1. Yes. I mean, look at how slow their construction speed is nowadays! The company as a whole is definitely bloated and mismanaged.
But even Knott's couldn't just throw open the gates whenever they decided to do their event. You can't leave a theme park dormant for any period of time and just reopen (those seasonal parks that close for the winter don't just sit there for six months doing nothing and then throw open the gates-they're refurbishing, redecorating, inspecting/maintaining rides, etc). Inevitably you will have to do the necessary preparations to have guests in the space again, including cleaning, ordering food/merchandise, hiring and (re)training of staff, putting up new signage, etc. But Knott's is not only less watched than Disney but pivoted much faster, so it probably seems like they could do it overnight. No way that was actually the case.
2. Hence why I said unlikely. Disney can still be a very conservative company. What else is Iger's Disney output if not incredibly conservative and risk-averse? They're literally just making the same movies over and over again and being rewarded for doing so! Additionally, Disney knows that the minute they let the locals flood the parks, they will do so. Better to do it slowly and carefully.
3. The vloggers will absolutely lose their heads when MSUSA opens, not to mention the general population.
4. As I said, it's arguable, but DCA has some nice food options in Carthay, the Pacific Wharf, the cones, Ghiradelli, etc. Not saying DL has all bad options, but I think that pixie dust inflation and/or nostalgia applies more and makes the parks seem less equal than they really are in the food department.
6. I've always thought BVS was actually pretty nice, apparent questionable backstory aside! Not that there isn't something intangible about Main Street, but BVS is hardly amateur hour either.
It makes sense to start with DCA because right now people will eat up ANYTHING that will allow them a little bit of Disneyland. It's an appetizer. If they were to open bits of DL first and then slowly open parts of DCA, no one would care about DCA. But if DL itself remains closed, then suddenly just being in DCA will be highly appealing to many people.
Still, I'm sure that in time they will open DL and they could even do a "throwback" advertising campaign to match. "Remember when you could just come into Disneyland for a few dollars and enjoy it like an actual park? Well now, Disney presents a special, MAGICAL limited time offer to experience the atmosphere of the park the way it used to be, but with the modern amenities and Disneyland touches of the day that we know you've missed, like Plaza Inn Chicken and $20 churros, now featuring pumpkin spice!" etc.
Your post wins the Disneyland internet award for the week.
... only if it’s Soarin over California though.