Trip Report VISIONS OF STEEL & WOOD - Roller Coaster Road Trip 2018

VISIONS OF STEEL & WOOD: ROLLER COASTER ROAD TRIP 2018​

Two whole weeks of nothing but roller coasters! A dozen amusement parks! Countless multiple dozen thrills! Hundreds of miles! Eight dark rides!

Come join me, - and assorted roller coaster fanatics – on an epic journey from Michigan through Ohio, Kentucky, Indiana, Pennsylvania and New Jersey. On this ridiculous roadtrip, there won’t be a single Disney or Universal theme park in view. Instead our sights are set on the opposite side of the amusement park coin, on the wondrous world of coaster parks!

Yes, it’s thrills over theming! And I couldn’t be happier! Now don’t get me wrong, I love Disney parks (I mean, obviously…I’m active on WDWMagic). But to fully appreciate Disney, I love to explore everything else available too. To see alternate evolutions on ride concepts. Historical parks which preserve what the amusement industry was like well before Walt’s revolution. Pier parks. Trolley parks. Iron parks with steel monstrosities towering hundreds of feet overhead. In this world, Cedar Fair and Six Flags are the top dogs. Parks aren’t resorts, they’re adventures. It’s tiring, it’s extreme, it’s a wholly different sort of vacation from Disney! (For that, see my Hong Kong/Tokyo TR from last year, or await my return from Shanghai in late September).

And what all destinations could we cover in a hectic two weeks?

​

Greenfield Village – A “living history” park created by Henry Ford to celebrate 19th century Americana, and an indisputable influence on Walt’s Disneyland.

Henry Ford Museum – The world class museum next door with its exceptional collection of American vehicles, inventions and more.

Cedar Point – Arguably the destination for roller coasters, and one of my three favorite parks in the world alongside Disneyland and Tokyo DisneySea. Home to the brand-new Steel Vengeance, already perhaps the world’s best roller coaster!

Kings Island – Cedar Point’s Cincinnati adjunct, a home for many exceptional coasters in a park whose theming and organization recall Disney.

Kentucky Kingdom – A small state fair wedged in between a mall and an airport, one which has become permanent.

Holiday World – A wonderful family-run park in Indiana’s most remote corner, noteworthy for its tremendous hospitality, water park and wooden coasters.

Kennywood – A Pittsburgh trolley park which opened in 1898, and to this day retains its vintage Luna Park style charm with some modern niceties.

Del Grosso’s Amusement Park – Basically a permanent carnival which emerged alongside a pasta sauce factory.

Knoebels – Wedged in the Pennsylvania wilderness is a timewarp where the 1920s never died, lawsuits never occur, and this incredible carnie-run park rejects every lesson ever learned by Disney.

Hershey Park – For some reason the Hershey Company decided to extend their brand with a park on par with Cedar Fair or Six Flags, full of professionalism, cleanliness, and no personality.

Dorney Park – One of Cedar Fair’s neglected regional parks. It has some rides.

Morey’s Piers – A wondrously fun pier park right along the Jersey Shore, like something straight out of Bob’s Burgers!

Philly on the 4th – Celebrating our nation’s birth on its birthday in its birthplace, in a town where the locals are more concerned with Rocky.

Six Flags Great Adventure – The grand finale occurs at the best Six Flags park, the world’s largest amusement park, home to the world’s tallest roller coaster.

Joining me on this quixotic quest would be a core group of four thrill-seekers, plus other assorted buddies here and there. Among this group, I was undoubtedly the Disney Dork™, the relative coaster novice with only around 100 previously under my belt compared to the 400+ these guys could boast.

Their perspective and insight is something else, and we’ll be meeting them all as my stream-of-consciousness report continues. (To start here’s the beginning of AJ’s very own trip report found elseweb.) For now, let’s simply dive into the thick of things and get this report rolling!

 

[D Hulk]

Did you ever get to ride the Racer when 1 coaster went backwards and 1 forward racing each other? I really miss being able to ride the backward one!!

Oh wow, I've never even heard about Racer running 1 side backwards! This sounds incredible! Why would they stop something like that?

 

[TheMouseFan]

Oh wow, I've never even heard about Racer running 1 side backwards! This sounds incredible! Why would they stop something like that?

I don't know why they stopped, but it happened soon after Cedar Fair took over.

 

[pezgirlroy]

I don't know why they stopped, but it happened soon after Cedar Fair took over.

That is how it always was when I was a kid (I am now 40 so it was awhile ago). I also miss the Hanna Barbara characters running around. I was once almost smothered by Captain Caveman.

 

[D Hulk]

Too Much Time Spent in Kings Island (Also THE BEAST!)
​

For whatever reason, for lunch we settle on a regional chain called Skyline Chili. As usual, I think Josh’s restrictive palette was a major deciding factor. The place is known for its distinctive chili, which they randomly serve on top of spaghetti. In practice it’s just a variation on spaghetti with marinara sauce. I order mine with extra spicy chili and habanero cheese. If there was even the slightest hint of kick to my meal, it escaped me. Midwestern food is very mild.

From the pic, you can guess the meal wasn’t too great. Decent ritz crackers. The restaurant’s hospitality, however, was really special in that great Southern style. Since we were all first-timers, we got the royal treatment. Take-home bags with little souvenirs and everything!

Adequately fed, we returned to Kings Island. By now the crowds have arrived, and we have to trek across most of the parking lot this time to reach the entrance.

Also, it’s starting to get stupid hot with a big summer heatwave approaching. Time for a slower, indoors ride with A/C. Time for Boo Blasters on Boo Hill. This is another of those rinky- Sally Corp dark rides like Gobbler Getaway, one with a bog standard haunted house theme. Previously it was a Scooby-Doo ride. That influence is still evident, with a cartoonish aesthetic and an off-model Fred animatronic.

This is not a very good dark ride. The blasters rarely work and are hard to use anyway. The scenery is cheap-looking and not terribly imaginative to boot. At Holiday World I’m more forgiving of a similar ride. Kings Island, which has shown a real talent for theming elsewhere, could certainly make something a lot better. The park needs a dark ride, especially over here in the rather good Planet Snoopy area, so for now this one fits the bill I guest.

Afterwards we all do Mystic Timbers again.

As the afternoon continues, it just gets hotter and more crowded. And we’ve basically finished the park twice! My travel mates decide to do a third tour of the park, doing all the same coasters yet again only in hotter, longer queues. I decline. Instead I head off on my own with the simple plan to loiter aimlessly until the day concludes.

To that end, I start by riding the Kings Island & Miami Valley Railroad. It’s another relaxing full-scale steam train tour, this one through the forests surrounding Mystic Timbers and out to the remotely-located Soak City. And if you thought Kings Island was crowded…!

Then I head back over to Banshee, not to ride Banshee, but to get some blue-and-purple Banshee ice cream. I’m told that this special flavor is discontinued, so instead I simply get Kings Island’s famous, iconic blue soft serve. It tastes like schnozzberries.

Then I went to giant enclosed beer garden for a pint of local Yuengling. (Not the Yuengling!) I’m the group’s only drunk now that Jim is gone. For some reason the German beer hall was host to a live country music performance. Why is country the only live music done at amusement parks???!! The performance slowly morphs from “patriotic” to “nationalistic” to “xenophobic ethnostate,” at which point I dart off to the park’s central French icon instead.

I ride the elevator up to the Eiffel Tower’s observation deck. There are great views of the many big coasters and surrounding suburbs. It’s a pleasant-if-brief rest, but not a way to fill out the day.

And there are many, many hours remaining. I am at a loss. At last, I decide to simply do my favorite thing in Kings Island, and to do that repeatedly until the day ends…

I go and ride The Beast seven times in a row!

So far I’ve been putting off a full detailed description of The Beast. Here it is:

The Beast is legendary. It was built in-house in 1979, and it’s very rare that a park will design and build its own ride without a manufacturer’s help. (See also Cannibal, Lagoon.) To this day The Beast remains the world’s longest wooden coaster, falling just short of a jaw-dropping mile and a half long! Let’s climb on board and ride this Beast out!

From off-ride all you’ll see is the rather tall lift hill, vanishing away from the park’s safety into the dark and foreboding Ohio forests. The train rattles up an ancient chain lift reeking of oil, while a staticky speaker ominously intones “No standing on The Beast.”

The hill is 110’ tall. The drop is 140’. You tumble helplessly towards the prairie, only to suddenly discover a concrete ditch which plunges you further into the earth. Darkness and shaking! You emerge into the forest primeval, transported to a primitive animal state where Man has never dared enter. The Beast rushes directly past branches and roots and ditches.

​

It is a single-minded monster, simply following the terrain at heedless speeds further and further from civilization. (Too bad about the trim brakes.) Those who pooh-pooh The Beast say it needs to do something out here, to have a drop or an overbanked turn. But The Beast doesn’t follow the rules of other coasters. It’s about that journey, about the coaster and the setting matching each other. This wouldn’t work plopped into a parking lot, and that’s one of my big arguments for why coasters a more than simply physical thrills.

Then The Beast has a second lift hill – it goes out so dang far that it can’t even get back to the station! The hill carries us back within sight of Kings Island. Not to waste this new built-up energy, the ride then performs a ridiculously massive double-helix, screaming through old resin-stinking tunnels, plunging forever leftwards with merciless lateral forces pressing you against the seat. The train struggles to remain tethered to its track, like a proper woodie. This latter half of The Beast definitely pales to its initial wooded rush, but it helps to fill out a wildly generous 4-minute ride length.

***

As the day goes on, eventually my travel mates discover me reentering The Beast’s queue for the umpteenth time. Several hours remain before closing time, but we all concur that we’re pretty much done with Kings Island now. So we leave, we stop at a Raising Cane’s restaurant for dinner (a concession to Josh, who exclusively eats pizza and chicken tenders), and we call it quits.

Up next: Kennywood!!!

 

[Disneyhead'71]

Too Much Time Spent in Kings Island (Also THE BEAST!)
​

For whatever reason, for lunch we settle on a regional chain called Skyline Chili. As usual, I think Josh’s restrictive palette was a major deciding factor. The place is known for its distinctive chili, which they randomly serve on top of spaghetti. In practice it’s just a variation on spaghetti with marinara sauce. I order mine with extra spicy chili and habanero cheese. If there was even the slightest hint of kick to my meal, it escaped me. Midwestern food is very mild.

From the pic, you can guess the meal wasn’t too great. Decent ritz crackers. The restaurant’s hospitality, however, was really special in that great Southern style. Since we were all first-timers, we got the royal treatment. Take-home bags with little souvenirs and everything!

Adequately fed, we returned to Kings Island. By now the crowds have arrived, and we have to trek across most of the parking lot this time to reach the entrance.

Also, it’s starting to get stupid hot with a big summer heatwave approaching. Time for a slower, indoors ride with A/C. Time for Boo Blasters on Boo Hill. This is another of those rinky-**** Sally Corp dark rides like Gobbler Getaway, one with a bog standard haunted house theme. Previously it was a Scooby-Doo ride. That influence is still evident, with a cartoonish aesthetic and an off-model Fred animatronic.

This is not a very good dark ride. The blasters rarely work and are hard to use anyway. The scenery is cheap-looking and not terribly imaginative to boot. At Holiday World I’m more forgiving of a similar ride. Kings Island, which has shown a real talent for theming elsewhere, could certainly make something a lot better. The park needs a dark ride, especially over here in the rather good Planet Snoopy area, so for now this one fits the bill I guest.

Afterwards we all do Mystic Timbers again.

As the afternoon continues, it just gets hotter and more crowded. And we’ve basically finished the park twice! My travel mates decide to do a third tour of the park, doing all the same coasters yet again only in hotter, longer queues. I decline. Instead I head off on my own with the simple plan to loiter aimlessly until the day concludes.

To that end, I start by riding the Kings Island & Miami Valley Railroad. It’s another relaxing full-scale steam train tour, this one through the forests surrounding Mystic Timbers and out to the remotely-located Soak City. And if you thought Kings Island was crowded…!

Then I head back over to Banshee, not to ride Banshee, but to get some blue-and-purple Banshee ice cream. I’m told that this special flavor is discontinued, so instead I simply get Kings Island’s famous, iconic blue soft serve. It tastes like schnozzberries.

Then I went to giant enclosed beer garden for a pint of local Yuengling. (Not the Yuengling!) I’m the group’s only drunk now that Jim is gone. For some reason the German beer hall was host to a live country music performance. Why is country the only live music done at amusement parks???!! The performance slowly morphs from “patriotic” to “nationalistic” to “xenophobic ethnostate,” at which point I dart off to the park’s central French icon instead.

I ride the elevator up to the Eiffel Tower’s observation deck. There are great views of the many big coasters and surrounding suburbs. It’s a pleasant-if-brief rest, but not a way to fill out the day.

And there are many, many hours remaining. I am at a loss. At last, I decide to simply do my favorite thing in Kings Island, and to do that repeatedly until the day ends…

I go and ride The Beast seven times in a row!

So far I’ve been putting off a full detailed description of The Beast. Here it is:

The Beast is legendary. It was built in-house in 1979, and it’s very rare that a park will design and build its own ride without a manufacturer’s help. (See also Cannibal, Lagoon.) To this day The Beast remains the world’s longest wooden coaster, falling just short of a jaw-dropping mile and a half long! Let’s climb on board and ride this Beast out!

From off-ride all you’ll see is the rather tall lift hill, vanishing away from the park’s safety into the dark and foreboding Ohio forests. The train rattles up an ancient chain lift reeking of oil, while a staticky speaker ominously intones “No standing on The Beast.”

The hill is 110’ tall. The drop is 140’. You tumble helplessly towards the prairie, only to suddenly discover a concrete ditch which plunges you further into the earth. Darkness and shaking! You emerge into the forest primeval, transported to a primitive animal state where Man has never dared enter. The Beast rushes directly past branches and roots and ditches.

​

It is a single-minded monster, simply following the terrain at heedless speeds further and further from civilization. (Too bad about the trim brakes.) Those who pooh-pooh The Beast say it needs to do something out here, to have a drop or an overbanked turn. But The Beast doesn’t follow the rules of other coasters. It’s about that journey, about the coaster and the setting matching each other. This wouldn’t work plopped into a parking lot, and that’s one of my big arguments for why coasters a more than simply physical thrills.

Then The Beast has a second lift hill – it goes out so dang far that it can’t even get back to the station! The hill carries us back within sight of Kings Island. Not to waste this new built-up energy, the ride then performs a ridiculously massive double-helix, screaming through old resin-stinking tunnels, plunging forever leftwards with merciless lateral forces pressing you against the seat. The train struggles to remain tethered to its track, like a proper woodie. This latter half of The Beast definitely pales to its initial wooded rush, but it helps to fill out a wildly generous 4-minute ride length.

***

As the day goes on, eventually my travel mates discover me reentering The Beast’s queue for the umpteenth time. Several hours remain before closing time, but we all concur that we’re pretty much done with Kings Island now. So we leave, we stop at a Raising Cane’s restaurant for dinner (a concession to Josh, who exclusively eats pizza and chicken tenders), and we call it quits.

Up next: Kennywood!!!

Yeah! Kennywood is OPEN!

 

[pezgirlroy]

Now I have to chime in and disagree. Cincinnati chili (skyline particularly) is one of the greatest foods in the world. If you are born in Cincinnati it is basically in your blood. First thing I do when I go home to visit is go to Skyline.

 

[D Hulk]

I don't know why they stopped, but it happened soon after Cedar Fair took over.

That is how it always was when I was a kid (I am now 40 so it was awhile ago). I also miss the Hanna Barbara characters running around. I was once almost smothered by Captain Caveman.

There's so much history to Kings Island, especially from the Paramount years. Tomb Raider sounded amazing. I gather that early on when Cedar Fair took over, things changed at Kings Island and not exclusively for the best. Would have loved to see the park in its earlier years with all the characters and themes fully intact.

Yeah! Kennywood is OPEN!

Kennywood RULES!

Now I have to chime in and disagree. Cincinnati chili (skyline particularly) is one of the greatest foods in the world. If you are born in Cincinnati it is basically in your blood. First thing I do when I go home to visit is go to Skyline.

Hope there's no anger. We still had a great time at Skyline; their hospitality was on-point. Didn't know Cincinnati chili was a thing, which is neat. Will have to try it again next time I'm in the area.

 

[Disneyhead'71]

There's so much history to Kings Island, especially from the Paramount years. Tomb Raider sounded amazing. I gather that early on when Cedar Fair took over, things changed at Kings Island and not exclusively for the best. Would have loved to see the park in its earlier years with all the characters and themes fully intact.

Kennywood RULES!

Hope there's no anger. We still had a great time at Skyline; their hospitality was on-point. Didn't know Cincinnati chili was a thing, which is neat. Will have to try it again next time I'm in the area.

I'm personally not a fan of Skyline. It's a mid-west thing. Even Steak and Shake, which is from Indianapolis, serves Cincinnati style chili (bland watery chili and toppings over spaghetti). No offense meant @pezgirlroy where I come from they put molasses in their Hot Dog Chili, YUCK!

 

[pezgirlroy]

There's so much history to Kings Island, especially from the Paramount years. Tomb Raider sounded amazing. I gather that early on when Cedar Fair took over, things changed at Kings Island and not exclusively for the best. Would have loved to see the park in its earlier years with all the characters and themes fully intact.

Kennywood RULES!

Hope there's no anger. We still had a great time at Skyline; their hospitality was on-point. Didn't know Cincinnati chili was a thing, which is neat. Will have to try it again next time I'm in the area.

No anger at all. It is one of those things where you love it or hate it. I believe there are even books written on cincinnati chili. It is truly one of those things that is not understood outside of the area. And it really isn't chili. It is more of a meat sauce. And I miss it like crazy. Probably because I cannot get it here unless I order cans from amazon.

 

[Skibum1970]

Paramount let the park and the parks in the chain go to seed. They started off great and just changed the focus. For instance, they decided "no more thrill rides" and started trying to build either family coasters or rides that just didn't fit. Tomb Raider was one and it was a maintenance nightmare. Other rides, such as the sim "Days Of Thunder" were actually fun but also closed. When Cedar Fair came in, KI was kind of dismal and neglected. CF then cleaned up the park and made it really nice again. Yes, the movie theme was removed but the park was improved. So, the Paramount Years were a mixed bag but ended on a negative note.

More Interesting Notes:
The Beast: Designed inhouse but with Charles Dinn, a KI Construction Director. Dinn went on to form Dinn Corp which designed many notorious coasters such as the Mean Streak, Texas Giant, and Georgia Cyclone and all three are now RMC'd. The Beast is best experienced after evening has set in and it is getting dark. Also, from what I recall, the coaster reaches its max speed after the second tunnel when the coaster is hurtling down the back stretch.

The Racer: Backwards wasn't all that great. Not bad but not great.

Boo Blasters replaced the third iteration of rides in that spot, Phantom Theater, which was a fun dark ride. Boo Blasters sucks and the guns do as well.

I may have spent too much time at Kings Island. However, it was the only park close (two hours vs Cedar Point's three hours) and I had a season pass there for almost two decades.

 

[Disneyhead'71]

You guys are gonna get me monologueing. The Racer's importance to the Renaissance of coasters/amusement park during the '70s can't be overstated. John Allen was to The Philadelphia Toboggan Co. (PTC) that John Hench was to WDI. Ok, more like the Tony Baxter, but you guys get my point.

 

[Skibum1970]

You guys are gonna get me monologueing. The Racer's importance to the Renaissance of coasters/amusement park during the '70s can't be overstated. John Allen was to The Philadelphia Toboggan Co. (PTC) that John Hench was to WDI. Ok, more like the Tony Baxter, but you guys get my point.

It's funny. Last night, my friend and I were riding the Racer and afterward talked about how it was the Big Dog in its day. Sadly, it is a little rough right now. Screamscape stated that RMC was touring it and there was conjecture about what that meant. I wouldn't expect it to get the Mean Streak treatment but maybe new topper track. You really have to pick your seat carefully or you'll get jackhammered.

 

[MinnieM123]

The Beast is legendary. It was built in-house in 1979, and it’s very rare that a park will design and build its own ride without a manufacturer’s help. (See also Cannibal, Lagoon.) To this day The Beast remains the world’s longest wooden coaster, falling just short of a jaw-dropping mile and a half long! Let’s climb on board and ride this Beast out!

Oh my gosh! I just watched the POV of The Beast--amazing!!! That's got to be the top (or close to the top) wooden coaster in the country. Wow, just wow!!

 

[DisSplash]

This is a fantastic trip report!! My 14 year old son is a coaster fanatic, who also apparently counts his coaster rides on his iPad, so I guess I got myself a kid with "credits," huh? Never knew that was what it was called. In any case, he is enjoying your writeups when I read them to him (while he watches coaster POV's on youtube).

I realize it's the Cedar Fair connection, but King's Dominion also has that Stunt Coaster (I am personally not a fan), that terrible Boo dark ride in its Snoopy land, and an identical entry to the park with that Eiffel tower lookalike. We drove out to KD last month for my son, and tried to get him on Twisted Timbers, but true to your assessment of RMC built rides, it was in its "Regular Maintenance Constantly" phase. We never even saw them run the empty cars in the whole two hours we hung out there. We ended up leaving early, as my son ended up going the way of your friend Josh with his stomach issues, but we are going back next week. We'll see how it works out next time!

Cannot wait to hear more of your wild and crazy coaster trip!

 

[D Hulk]

Day 8 – Kennywood
​

First thing this morning we drop Kevin off at the Kentucky airport. His vacation is complete.

We’re down to four now – me, AJ, Josh and Evan. The next leg sees us driving the reasonable distance into Pennsylvania, into Pittsburgh. Waze sends us across many convoluted rural back roads to avoid Pittsburgh traffic, meaning it’s past noon once we reach our destination…Kennywood, an incredible antique trolley park filled with character!

We stopped for lunch at a dumpy A&W/Long John Silver’s within eyesight of Kennywood. The food was meh.

Parking is along a cracked old asphalt lot. Overflow parking is further up slope, accessed via chairlift. Either way parking is free, with great views of the tiny 80 acre park below. And unless you’re springing for “VIP” parking, you’ll be taking a covered escalator to the park’s entrance. All this, mind you, is found across the street from Kennywood. This confused Josh to no end, because he doesn’t like uncertainty in life. After we passed through the quaint entry gates we reached a stadium-style concrete tunnel running under the boulevard, and all was right again with Josh’s life for about five minutes.

Emerging, you are instantly within the splendid woodsy groves of Kennywood. It is a vintage trolley park dating back to 1899, with many Victorian Era buildings and design features retaining that era’s allure. Newer additions (by “newer,” I mean “1920s”) include Coney-esque electronic penny arcades and a Laughing Sally. This is an independent park, no chain acquisition, so it keeps a lot of that “rough around the edges” nostalgic beauty. Even before doing any rides, I know I’m gonna love this place!

Sky Rocket is a launched inverting steel coaster with a top hat by Premier Rides. It was closed for our visit, which is alright as it looks like the least interesting of their “big boy” rides.

Instead we begin at the beginning, chronologically, with Jack Rabbit, one of the very oldest wooden coasters in the whole wide world. It dates way back to 1920, and visually it definitely looks the part. Really, wonderfully vintage! That aesthetic alone is enough to propel Jack Rabbit to my #1 ride in the park, even pre-ride.

The train cars are boxy old rattlers. They feature stiff, unmoveable lap bars, and not even seat belts. You just gotta wedge in under the bar and hold on – it isn’t coming down! The ride itself is fantastically smooth; it’s holding up great! Using the park’s terrain, there’s a big unexpected drop and even a turnaround tunnel before the lift hill. Following that is an amazing, airtime-filled double down moment. Just a really fun ride!

Josh feels sick because he ate Long John Silver’s, so for now he sits out Jack Rabbit. For his sake, we do a dark ride next – Garfield’s Nightmare. Ignore the IP, the ride’s bare skeleton is the world’s oldest surviving Old Mill dating way, way back to 1901. The exterior façade retains that antique look. So do the boats and the layout – a simple water trough (like a predecessor to Small World) through the basic “tunnel of love” route.

We sit down and don our 3D glasses. Yes. The Garfield element is all blacklight backdrops painted in glowing neon colors, like a bad phantasmagorical acid trip. The 3D glasses bring out certain colors, which make the nightmarish imagery float eerily. That imagery is of anthropomorphic food attacking Garfield, mostly. It’s pretty bizarre stuff – the type which creates nervous insane laughter in your fellow adult riders.

I’d’ve loved to see the earlier ride incarnations, like the travelogue and diorama rides or the awesome-sounding “Hardheaded Harold’s Horrendously Humorous Haunted Hideaway.” It makes sense that Kennywood would want to license a known IP, to keep this century-old ride appealing to the younglings.

Next we head to the newest ride so far…1927’s Racer. It’s another wooden racing coaster, one distinguished by its inimitable vintage quirks. Even the outer façade, with its Victorian proscenium and popcorn bulbs, recalls old-time Coney. The interior loading station is a maze of wood, creaking and oil-smelling. Trains rush under the switchback queue to their lift hills, then utilize that same rolling Pittsburgh terrain to create an unexpectedly exciting and wild coaster ride. Notably, it’s a Moebius coaster, the only one in the U.S.; trains return to the opposite loading dock.

We pass around Kennywood’s tiny swanboat-infested lagoon, and past its iconic twin yellow arrows and their terrifying Aero 360 flat ride. Past the picnic grounds and the expected kiddie area with its expected (and unridden) kiddie coaster, Phantom Junior. We head to Auto Race.

This is like the predecessor to the Tin Lizzies, or even to a go-kart track. It’s an electrified outdoor mini-car ride held in place not by rails, but by a wooden coaster-style trough which surrounds the cars. Each tiny car holds two, but you’ll be kissing your knees. Since Josh drove this morning, I elect to chauffeur him on Auto Race. We head out after AJ and Evan, with several double-back moments allowing Evan and me to high five each other.

(This is likely against the park’s rules, but Kennywood’s the sort of place where safety warnings are mere guidelines. The ride ops walk on the coaster tracks!)

Already we’ve physically covered half of this tiny park, but there’s tons more to see! We continue around pop-up stands where local merchants have set up their little mom & pop shops. Beads, knickknacks, art galleries, stuff you’d expect at a swap meet instead of an amusement park.

We pass by construction walls. Kennywood had just begun construction on a new Thomas Town area for families. It says something about Kennywood’s construction speed (versus Disney’s) that Thomas Town will be opening three days from now, well before I complete my trip report.

Next is Ghostwood Estate, a 2008 ride with old school charm. Because seemingly every park needs a haunted house shooter dark ride. This one is actually really good! There’s a pre-show, much like Haunted Mansion’s stretching room, outlining the backstory. It turns out that one Lord Ghostwood just happens to a own a ghost-infested manor, and he’s relying upon us random sweating interlopers to blast the ghosts as a way to evict them.

The entire ride is upstairs, above shops and restaurants. We ride Ghost Buggies equipped with Ghost Blasters. These are ETF Ride System trackless vehicles. I was shocked at first that a park like Kennywood would’ve managed to go trackless, but these aren’t the hyper-expensive LPS marvels of Disney, these are simpler wire-embedded vehicles. They don’t really take advantage of the trackless aspect (not like Efteling’s Symbolica, which uses the same system), mostly following a linear path at a constant speed.

The shooting element is a bit improved from the Boo/Gobbler style…though it’s still a bit stiff. Rather, the most impressive part was simply the set dressing, the aesthetic. Picture Haunted Mansion made on a regional budget, but with heart and imagination to spare. After a while I basically quit on the shooting element to admire the sights & frights.

One more antique wooden coaster to go – Thunderbolt, a relative newbie from 1968. Actually, it’s a refurb of a 1924 model called Pippin. It’s a bit larger than the others, given its newer vintage, again with fantastic use of Kennywood’s rolling terrain. There’s a decent coaster section even before the lift hill, all found along a vegetated cliffside overlooking the Monongahela River and its rusted smoking steel factories hundreds of feet below. A great view!

Following the lift hill, Thunderbolt rampages through a rather forceful lateral spin, looping twice around the exposed sunbaked queue. Then it again plummets over the cliff’s edge, providing more astounding dropoff views before rocketing back into the station.

Upon return, I remark on Kennywood’s ride operations. They aren’t good. Every ride (with the odd exception of Jack Rabbit) is running only a single train, and they’re loading slowly. It’s the flipside to that “anything goes” feeling of an antique park. Thunderbolt’s control booth sits directly above a parked train, which the operator is using as her stepladder. A rather funky old setup altogether, before codes and regulations and industry standards.

Up next: Kennywood kontinues.

 

[D Hulk]

By the way, I am loving the discussion that’s happening around this trip report. Love hearing about other’s experience with these and other coaster parks. I’ve mostly lived on the West Coast, so I’m learning some neat stuff from you guys. Loved the debate on regional chili too.

@DisSplash, I hope you and your son manage to return to KD soon and do Twisted Timbers. AJ’s been on it, and he actually prefers it to Steel Vengeance because it’s shorter and less repetitive. That Kings Island/Dominion connection goes way way back before Cedar Fair. Both were owned by Paramount, and I think by Taft Broadcasting before that.

 

[MinnieM123]

The train cars are boxy old rattlers. They feature stiff, unmoveable lap bars, and not even seat belts. You just gotta wedge in under the bar and hold on – it isn’t coming down! The ride itself is fantastically smooth; it’s holding up great! Using the park’s terrain, there’s a big unexpected drop and even a turnaround tunnel before the lift hill. Following that is an amazing, airtime-filled double down moment. Just a really fun ride!

Lap bars! ( ) That's what makes the ride even better and I'm so happy to hear that they have not replaced those with seat belts on Jack Rabbit. (Seat belts . . . )

Seat belts are the only drawback (even though the ride is still great) to the Yankee Cannonball (that I had previously mentioned in your thread here). Seat belts kill "air time" -- (note: this was similar to when they removed the lap bars in Tower of Terror in DHS -- the attraction was even more fun when the bars were used).

Anyway, I copied (below) directly from a Wikipedia article, the change from bars to seatbelts (on the Yankee Cannonball), and how that affected the ride --

Quoted From Wikipedia--
The primary elements include small hills designed to give moments of airtime and strongly banked turns. Restraints on the trains used to consist of a single lap bar with no seat belts allowing single riders to slide across the seat, making full use of the banked turns. Seat belts and center seat dividers were later added.

 

[D Hulk]

Kontinued Kennywood Craziness
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Noah’s Ark feels the most lawless of anything so far. This is a simple funhouse walkthrough, set in a goofy cartoonish replica of Noah’s Ark. The ark visibly sways, drawing you in. That rocking continues inside, as totally enclosed rooms never stop tilting 10 degrees on an axis. It’s disorienting by design. Even once you’re past the rocking, the confusion persists. Floors which zigzag. Floors which bounce up and down. A dizzifying “gravity hill” room. Flashing strobes which (signs promise) induce deadly vertigo. Walking through a spinning starfield tunnel. Plus chintzy plaster animals everywhere!

I went in expecting some sort of overtly religious proselytizing. That’s just a fig leaf. I came out unsure of my sanity.

Now, back to Thunderbolt. Throughout that ride, you can’t help but notice the bigger, snazzier, steelier coaster nearby – Phantom’s Revenge. It too takes full advantage of Kennywood’s tempestuous terrain and that amazing Monongahela overlook…better advantage, in fact, for outside of Ocean Park in Hong Kong, Phantom’s Revenge has the most beautiful, striking setting of any coaster I’ve yet seen.

We queue up for this renowned monstrosity, and I start to worry. Phantom’s Revenge began as Steel Phantom, precisely the sort of of older looping Arrow Dynamics coaster which I dislike. It had the world’s largest drop upon opening, over 200’, and we’ve since learned that inversions aren’t really needed on hypercoasters. Well, the rechristened Phantom’s Revenge lost its inversions! In 2000 it was retracked and altered by D.H. Morgan, becoming a perpetual Top Ten coaster.

The outset is underwhelming by coaster freak standards. We go up a slight 160’ lift hill away from the cliff, then ease into a gradual banking drop. Pretty ho-hum, really. Ah, but then you reach the ride’s second drop, which is taller! Trains plunge straight down Kennywood’s kliff, down towards an unseen bottom, straight through Thunderbolt, straight through the foliage! Phantom’s Revenge, you have my attention!

Okay, this moment is anticipated from the queue. What follows is even more shocking. Using up its enormous drop energy, Phantom’s Revenge transforms into an airtime champion! Banking around the ravine, bunny hopping over natural terrain, there’s barely a seated moment from now on! And the excellent D.H. Morgan trains only feature lap bars, really accentuating the awesomeness! (@MinnieM123)

(Note that next year, Kennywood will be getting an even taller steel coaster. Steel Curtain is to be part of a new land themed to the Pittsburgh Steelers. This’ll have the most inversions in the United States, with a rather atypical S&S layout, and could prove interesting.)

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The Phantom’s Revenge exit deposits us in Lost Kennywood, an area dedicated to the park’s nostalgic early 20th century history. The central feature is a Beaux Artes central fountain lagoon which is a scale replica of Coney Island’s old Luna Park. Like at Luna, a splash boat plunges into the canal. This gives the space real kinetics. With Phantom’s Revenge in the rear skyline, old-timey flat rides everywhere and the smells of cotton candy and corndogs wafting, there’s one obvious conclusion…Disney royally missed the mark with Paradise Pier! Some say Disney shouldn’t emulate pre-Walt parks; I say PP was a half-measure, made even worse now by Pixar “I Cancelled My Disneyland AP” Pier.

Our next major ride goal is Exterminator. However, we’re waiting for AJ’s friend Rob to arrive. He’s driving out from Williamsburg on his own solo coaster road trip, and has just reached Kennywood’s parking lot. While waiting for him, we do The Whip.

This is one of those truly iconic old flat rides. Cars on a rink move around a central bar. At the corners, cars whip out and drift like it’s Tokyo. Disney fans know the ride system from Mater’s Junkyard Jamboree or Alien Swirling Saucers. The Whip’s ride experience is just as much fun, with a nostalgic aesthetic all its own.

Rob enjoying a non-alcoholic beverage
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Once Rob arrives, we all queue up for Exterminator. This is an enclosed, fully themed Wild Mouse coaster. Pretty good theming, too, for a small regional park. The idea is that we’re all rats – giant grotesque mutated feral ooze-fed sewer rats – on the run from exterminators. Kind of the logical outgrowth of the whole Wild Mouse coaster concept. I’m not sure that a sewer is the most pleasant setting for a theme park…For about half an hour we switchback queued in a concrete sewer substation bunker, the shrieking voices of sun-drunk teenagers echoing in the tiny space. It felt convincingly like a dingy old drainage cistern, so props to Kennywood’s theming folks I guess.

The sewage theming continues throughout the ride. The ride itself, I’m told, is the same layout as Primeval Whirl at Animal Kingdom. Most Wild Mouse layouts are pretty similar already. You start with the usual unbanked hairpin switchbacks on the top, then do some dips and turns under the compact structure. Halfway through, the rat-shaped car starts to spin. I ride with Rob for unequal weight distribution. That experience is all rather typical. There’s only so much that can be done with the Wild Mouse format. The dark ride elements elevate it as much as possible, with hazmat suits and flashing lights. Not my favorite Kennywood ride, but certainly a distinctive family thrill ride.

Next we grab a dinner at The Potato Patch, possibly Kennywood’s best-known food hole. They’re famed for their loaded French fried topped with hot creamy cheese, gigantic bacon, beef gravy, garlic salt, and other life-shortening delicacies. I’d hoped to share mine with Josh – it was far more fry than I could pound – but Josh’s delicate tastebuds refused. The fries were tasty and overwhelming, and piping hot too.

Following fries, we set about redoing our favorite attractions. Another topsy turvy stumble through Noah’s Ark. The revenge of Phantom’s Revenge. Thunderbolt strikes again. While the others rerode Racer, I paused at a fresh-squeezed lemonade stand (independently operated) for a really truly genuinely good and refreshing drink. Then we did Jack Rabbit again, a gift to Josh since he’d missed out before. Then for Rob’s sake we redid Garfield’s Nightmare.

Night falls and Kennywood puts on a little nighttime spectacular near their lagoon. There’s a small drop-screen with a GIF laser show. Generic pop music, of course, accompanies. It’s another neat wrinkle to the day.

One final hurrah before we go! Kangaroo, this bizarre little flat ride which stands out among the rest. From off-ride it doesn’t look like much to hardened coaster psychopaths, just wheeled cars running around in a circle. At one end they rise up a short ramp, complete with “sproing!” sound effect, then drift back to Earth. Occasionally a toothless prospecter’s voice hollers “Kangarooooo!” Ride this, though, and you’ll find a pleasantly goofy flat with some unexpected airtime on that ramp. Worth doing as a forgotten antique you can’t find anyplace else.

There is of course more at Kennywood which we didn’t do. This is true of every park throughout. Carousels, rafts, vomitifying flat rides, shoot the chutes, you name it. With more time or interest, maybe we’d do these too. At every park, our focus has been on the best and most noteworthy rides.

Up next: DelGrosso’s & Knoebels

 

[MinnieM123]

Okay, this moment is anticipated from the queue. What follows is even more shocking. Using up its enormous drop energy, Phantom’s Revenge transforms into an airtime champion! Banking around the ravine, bunny hopping over natural terrain, there’s barely a seated moment from now on! And the excellent D.H. Morgan trains only feature lap bars, really accentuating the awesomeness!

O.k. That sounds scary!!

Moving right along here, I think that Kangaroo ride at Kennywood looks like hilarious fun!

Oh, I forgot to mention that the blue ice cream at Kings Island looks so healthy. (I'll take two, please! )

 

[D Hulk]

Day 9 – DelGrosso’s Amusement Park
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We spend the night in Pittsburgh, in a Comfort Inn which doesn’t have the now-expected terrible complimentary breakfast. Instead they have a Panera. It’s nice to get a decent pastry in the morning instead, though I resent paying for it.

Now we must say farewell to Evan, who’s parting ways with us in Pittsburgh. He’ll spend the day touring the city’s steel factories before flying back to L.A. The remaining three – me, AJ and Josh – we’ll be driving due east towards Knoebels.

(Rob is doing a detour on his own to do some tiny credit coasters at some little kiddie playlands. Sounds like a really awkward day for a lone grownup man.)

A slight road trip detour takes AJ, Josh and me to Tipton, Pennsylvania, to a minuscule little place called DelGrosso’s Amusement Park. This is easily the trip’s least known park. It barely even qualifies for the term “park.” “Permanent carnival” more like it. Most of the attractions are literally the same you’d find at your town’s annual harvest festival, portable plug ‘n’ play off-the-shelf flat rides just plopped atop the asphalt, with dinky chain link fences surrounding them. It’s a picnic ground with rides.

I’m not painting DelGrosso’s in a very flattering light so far. It’s actually a heartwarming little place, given its history. The DelGrosso family has run it for generations, and you definitely feel that family history. I once used DelGrosso’s in an armchair Imagineering competition, making it hard for me to pass up.

We park for free in a lot of gravel and grass. From there the fairgrounds are free to enter, accessed via a pedestrian bridge crossing the local State Route. Like any carnival, rides are pay-to-play, with tickets available from a little old lady in a fake plaster castle. We each buy around $4 worth.

First AJ and I do the X-Scream Tower drop tower while Josh saved himself the $1.50.

Then we all do DelGrosso’s Wild Mouse, Crazy Mouse. It’s outdoors, it doesn’t spin, it’s a generic Wild Mouse. This is DelGrosso’s biggest roller coaster.

Afterwards AJ alone does the Wacky Worm, a tiny powered coaster in a bedroom-sized space intended exclusively for small children under 6. AJ’s doing it because it’s there, and he’s being a coaster credit today. He’s just a big silly boy!

That does it for our epic DelGrosso’s ride tour, conquered in under 15 minutes. We ignore the other generic offerings, the Scrambler, the “Carouselle,” the Pharaoh’s Fury swinging ship or the Tilt-a-Whirl or the Dodgem. And of course we don’t do the flats in Kiddie Kingdom, since even scrawny Josh is too tall and heavy and massive to be allowed on.

Instead we lunch at Murf’s Kitchen, which is DelGrosso’s main draw. The DelGrosso family is mainly known for their Italian pasta sauce, which distributes regionally throughout Pennsylvania supermarkets and possibly a little further. Mama Murf, the family matriarch, used the park to test out her homemade recipes. Though she’s passed on, this humble quick service window continues her legacy.

The lunch is simply a meatball sandwich, and it’s only the DelGrosso’s sauce which really elevates, but that’s enough. You can feel that unspoken familial bond throughout the no-budget picnic ground settings. Deceased older generations are memorialized in a nearby grove. Local businesses advertise on signs throughout. Their mascot Buddy Bear (who looks just as you’re imagining) occasionally waddles past. Banners proclaim the picnic grounds’ upcoming concert series and other local events. It’s all incredibly low key.

Passing along the elevated walkway back to the car, we cross over DelGrosso’s best feature – its Laguna Splash water park. What I’ve described so far is the “old” DelGrosso’s. Laguna Splash, which only opened in 2016, represents where they’ve come.

It’s a modest-enough water park, one done with a charmingly goofy Italian theme (floating olive oil barrels, a miniature Tower of Pisa squirting off water). The place is eminently…professional. It feels permanent, unlike the fairgrounds. Compared to even your local Six Flags’ Hurricane Harbor, it’s a humble and small-scale water park, but for DelGrosso’s if feels like a major achievement.

Not that there’s anything here that’s remotely a draw for non-locals. We’re just passing through anyway, with far bigger plans for the majority of our day. Today we’re doing America’s Number One Amusement Park!

Up next: Knoebels!!!