News Tiana's Bayou Adventure - latest details and construction progress

[mickEblu]

It truly is. When they don’t even come within striking distance of my incredibly low expectations and create something this embarrassing and, as they say today, “cringe”, it is actually hard to believe.


Honestly, every person involved with this disaster should be fired.

And to think while they were creating this disaster they were spending time writing blogs about weathervanes and using a hot comb on AA Tiana’s hair to make it authentic. For 2 years on these boards I’ve been saying they had the wrong priorities and this was going to turn out bad. I just never imagined it could be this bad. Imagine if they would have used all that energy to just make a fun ride inspired by the actual source material?

 

[Epcot81Fan]

Then removing the tension from the lifthill and replacing it with ….nothing. I took my daughter on Little Mermaid yesterday. Theirs is more conflict on the omnimover ride in colorful clamshells than the ride with the 50 foot drop.

Another excellent point.

Over in the actual Fantasylands of the various parks (not “Frontierland” that has gigantic princess tiaras for some reason), the drama on those attractions come from:

- Running for your life from a witch that wants to put your heart in a box
- Being sent to Hell after being killed in a train crash after nearly destroying a city
- Being threatened with a life of imprisonment and child labor in the salt mines and devoured by a whale
- Kidnapping and sword fights to the death

In this ride the drama is…um…we may have to have Louis play solo at the party?

 

[Tha Realest]

For 2 years on these boards I’ve been saying they had the wrong priorities and this was going to turn out bad. I just never imagined it could be this bad.

Narratively the thing is a mess, which many of us expected. That said, many figured the story wouldn’t matter, as the improvement of the AAs would make up for the loss of narrative consistency or sheer volume of AAs, and that ultimately it’s a high-volume water attraction in a park that would continue to prove popular.

Even the most cynical of us underestimated how badly the technically operations would prove to be.

 

[erasure fan1]

Even the most cynical of us underestimated how badly the technically operations would prove to be.

That's very true. Of all the things I figured would go wrong with this thing. Technical operations never even made my list.

 

[mickEblu]

Another excellent point.

Over in the actual Fantasylands of the various parks (not “Frontierland” that has gigantic princess tiaras for some reason), the drama on those attractions come from:

- Running for your life from a witch that wants to put your heart in a box
- Being sent to Hell after being killed in a train crash after nearly destroying a city
- Being threatened with a life of imprisonment and child labor in the salt mines and devoured by a whale
- Kidnapping and sword fights to the death

In this ride the drama is…um…we may have to have Louis play solo at the party?

And then he doesn’t even play! Lol. You can’t make this stuff up. Louis should have had a nice solo at the end where the Mama Odie AA is with the beignets. Think the intro of the “When We’re Human” song. Since they didn’t play that or Friends on the Other side - my two favorite songs on the soundtrack. Or imagine how funny it would be if instead of another Mama Odie Lottie was “cat calling” male riders right before they get off the log? “No don’t go Hunny! I been waiting for you my whole life!”

 

[celluloid]

That's very true. Of all the things I figured would go wrong with this thing. Technical operations never even made my list.

Whatever Disney does not care about show, the same lack has been in operations for a long time.

Both guest experience. Which is something that has slacked entirely the last 12 years.

 

[Jedi14]

So every human musician in the entire city of New Orleans and surrounding area is booked for the evening and therefore the only solution is to venture out into the bayou to find little animals that can play music and bring them back to New Orleans to play at the party.

Uh, OK.

Well yes. That’s the plot… It’s stated in the queue that everyone’s booked.

 

[Incomudro]

Just checking to make sure I understand.

The final scene of the party appears to take place in New Orleans, not in the middle of the bayou.

So the entire premise of the attraction and catalyst for the “story” is based on they can’t find musicians in New Orleans?

Yeah, I said that once before.
They are in the mecca of jazz, but have to take a trip through a swamp in order to find animals that play instruments?

 

[Incomudro]

And to think while they were creating this disaster they were spending time writing blogs about weathervanes and using a hot comb on AA Tiana’s hair to make it authentic. For 2 years on these boards I’ve been saying they had the wrong priorities and this was going to turn out bad. I just never imagined it could be this bad. Imagine if they would have used all that energy to just make a fun ride inspired by the actual source material?

They had "one job."
Couldn't even get it right.

 

[Tha Realest]

Yeah, I said that once before.
They are in the mecca of jazz, but have to take a trip through a swamp in order to find animals that play instruments?

If there's anyone with a passing knowledge of New Orleans knows, let alone anyone that's been there once or twice (let alone on multiple educational trips), it's that there's a dearth of serviceable street musicians within earshot of anywhere in New Orleans proper at any given moment.

 

[Epcot81Fan]

If there's anyone with a passing knowledge of New Orleans knows, let alone anyone that's been there once or twice (let alone on multiple educational trips), it's that there's a dearth of serviceable street musicians within earshot of anywhere in New Orleans proper at any given moment.

The best part is having to endure WDI lecture us about what amazing “storytellers” they are in endless blog posts.

 

[Epcot81Fan]

Yeah, I said that once before.
They are in the mecca of jazz, but have to take a trip through a swamp in order to find animals that play instruments?

And exactly how loud do frog musicians play?

Can the people dancing in the finale even hear the frog musicians?

So they shrink you down to go get tiny musicians that can’t be heard at the party?

Good lord, this entire concept is idiotic.

 

[Jedi14]

And exactly how loud do frog musicians play?

Can the people dancing in the finale even hear the frog musicians?

So they shrink you down to go get musicians that can’t be heard at the party?

Good lord, this entire concept is idiotic.

Are you really going to question the concept of animal musicians?

 

[EagleScout610]

And exactly how loud do frog musicians play?

Can the people dancing in the finale even hear the frog musicians?

So they shrink you down to go get musicians that can’t be heard at the party?

Good lord, this entire concept is idiotic.

To add-

When you think about it, Tiana doesn't have the Bayou Adventure. She just finds 2 bands, then looks in a log, then goes to the party. Whee.

 

[Epcot81Fan]

To add-

When you think about it, Tiana doesn't have the Bayou Adventure. She just finds 2 bands, then looks in a log, then goes to the party. Whee.

Don’t forget the flailing! So, so much pointless flailing!

The disrespect they show for this character and the source material is just astonishing.

But WDI made her a custom dress for the finale! Or something!

 

[ᗩLᘿᑕ ✨ ᗩζᗩᗰ]

I'd forgive much of TBA if they'd just concoct a story of Tiana needing to finding a rare plant/herb for her latest "food" it could even be a plant that blooms, ripens, whatever when exposed to the sounds of music. Is it ridiculous, Yep! But it's still better than going on a quest to find an animal band (which is accomplished rather quickly)

 

[ᗩLᘿᑕ ✨ ᗩζᗩᗰ]

Don’t forget the flailing! So, so much pointless flailing!

It's the only way they can show off their advanced animatronic.

 

[Epcot81Fan]

I'd forgive much of TBA if they'd just concoct a story of Tiana needing to finding a rare plant/herb for her latest "food" it could even be a plant that blooms, ripens, whatever when exposed to the sounds of music. Is it ridiculous, Yep! But it's still better than going on a quest to find an animal band (which is accomplished rather quickly)

But even then - where is the “adventure” and is that a story worthy of an E-ticket attraction?

In the current version, not only does she not have an adventure or conflict of any kind, heck, she doesn’t even experience “inconvenience”.

The beats are:

“I need a band”
“Here’s one”
“Here’s another one”
“And another”
“Welcome to the party”

I have more of an “adventure” navigating traffic going to the dry cleaners.

 

[ᗩLᘿᑕ ✨ ᗩζᗩᗰ]

But even then - where is the “adventure” and is that a story worthy of an E-ticket attraction?

In the current version, not only does she not have an adventure or conflict of any kind, heck, she doesn’t even experience “inconvenience”.

The beats are:

“I need a band”
“Here’s one”
“Here’s another one”
“And another”
“Welcome to the party”

I have more of an “adventure” navigating traffic going to the dry cleaners.

The adventure is in trying to find the mcguffin. I agree it's weak sauce but let's not kid ourselves and think this was going to be anything other than a C-ticket. (on a good day) without any real stakes or conflict, it was always going to be an episode of Dora the Explorer. At least with trying to track down a missing ingredient or even Louis's trumpet there were some stakes, some sense of story progression.

As-is, the story progression ends the minute the attraction starts -- we find a band instantly. Horrah! Or should I say, Hallelujah!

 

[Epcot81Fan]

The adventure is in trying to find the mcguffin. I agree it's weak sauce but let's not kid ourselves and think this was going to be anything other than a C-ticket. (on a good day) without any real stakes or conflict, it was always going to be an episode of Dora the Explorer. At least with trying to track down a missing ingredient or even Louis's trumpet there were some stakes, some sense of story progression.

As-is, the story progression ends the minute the attraction starts -- we find a band instantly. Horrah! Or should I say, Hallelujah!

Exactly. The ride, based on its own premise, could end after the first scene.

“Hey, kids, meet Louis up ahead to find a band!” (flail, flail)

“Here’s Louis and a band!” (more flailing)

Please exit to your left.