The Miscellaneous Thought Thread

[CaptinEO]

Right. So I’ll rephrase it then.

He climbed up on stage on live tv and then hit someone one time. One time. This doesn’t automatically make him an abuser.

I think it may help to understand that just because you are able to forgive someone who behaved violently on one occasion, doesn't mean that others do.

I think many people, myself included, see someone who has assaulted people as an abuser, even if it is one occurence.

 

[Parteecia]

Regarding the second part of your post, we caught Will Smith hitting someone one time. One time. This doesn’t automatically mean he’s an abuser.

My point was that his son saw hitting as good and something to be proud of.

 

[Californian Elitist]

I think it may help to understand that just because you are able to forgive someone who behaved violently on one occasion, doesn't mean that others do.

I think many people, myself included, see someone who has assaulted people as an abuser, even if it is one occurence.

I know, hence why I said that you personally may be done with him. I’m well aware that people will cancel Will Smith. I’m also well aware that many of his fans will continue to support him, despite this incident.

Regarding your second point, I don’t see certain things as black and white. Abuse is usually consistent behavior, though there are cases, such as sexual abuse, where sometimes once is enough. I’m not going to label Will Smith an abuser. Just like I wouldn’t label Jim Carrey and sexual abuser for planting on unwanted kiss on Alicia Silverstone. According to your own beliefs, I too am an abuser. So be it, I guess.

 

[Californian Elitist]

My point was that his son saw hitting as good and something to be proud of.

Again, given the context, I see nothing wrong with Jaden coming to the conclusion that he came to. It’s not black and white.

We’ll agree to disagree.

 

[Parteecia]

Again, given the context, I see nothing wrong with Jaden coming to the conclusion that he came to. It’s not black and white.

We’ll agree to disagree.

We absolutely will on this point. And hope that his son didn't learn the wrong lesson, that it's okay to suckerslap someone smaller than you for words.

 

[CaptinEO]

I know, hence why I said that you personally may be done with him. I’m well aware that people will cancel Will Smith. I’m also well aware that many of his fans will continue to support him, despite this incident.

Regarding your second point, I don’t see certain things as black and white. Abuse is usually consistent behavior, though there are cases, such as sexual abuse, where sometimes once is enough. I’m not going to label Will Smith an abuser. Just like I wouldn’t label Jim Carrey and sexual abuser for planting on unwanted kiss on Alicia Silverstone. According to your own beliefs, I too am an abuser. So be it, I guess.

Everyone reacts differently.

I know to me it's probably a safety mechanism that if someone was violent at any point I will stay away from that person as they are a violent person in my mind.

Reason being that someone committing an act is more likely to have those tendencies that allowed them to commit the act in the first place.

Not everyone sees that way but I know that's how my mind works.

 

[Californian Elitist]

We absolutely will on this point. And hope that his son didn't learn the wrong lesson, that it's okay to suckerslap someone smaller than you for words.

Okay.

 

[Californian Elitist]

Everyone reacts differently.

I know to me it's probably a safety mechanism that if someone was violent at any point I will stay away from that person as they are a violent person in my mind.

Reason being that someone committing an act is more likely to have those tendencies that allowed them to commit the act in the first place.

Not everyone sees that way but I know that's how my mind works.

Given that I’ve hit someone in the past, we’ll cancel those Disneyland meet-up plans (they were probably already cancelled, if we’re being honest). Wouldn’t want you feeling unsafe around me, as I’m a dangerous person.

 

[drizgirl]

Right. So I’ll rephrase it then.

He climbed up on stage on live tv and then hit someone one time. One time. This doesn’t automatically make him an abuser.

I'm not sure he's an abuser. We don't have enough to come to that conclusion. But I have enough to assume he might be. Throwing a punch is not something that comes naturally to everyone. Especially a FIRST punch, thrown in response to words, so something done in self defense.

And to climb a stage and do it publicly like that takes it to a whole other level. I can't imagine what he's like in private. Maybe he's not violent. Maybe he's not an abuser. But I think there's a chance he is.

 

[CaptinEO]

Given that I’ve hit someone in the past, we’ll cancel those Disneyland meet-up plans (they were probably already cancelled, if we’re being honest). Wouldn’t want you feeling unsafe around me, as I’m a dangerous person.

There's context for everything.

My answer could've been more in depth but was just outlining the basics of how I feel.

There are situations where violence is justified be it verbal or physical.

Also would love to meet up with the hive of miserable bastards, just don't have an AP and most likely won't until they have an option with no reservations.

 

[Californian Elitist]

I'm not sure he's an abuser. We don't have enough to come to that conclusion. But I have enough to assume he might be. Throwing a punch is not something that comes naturally to everyone. Especially a FIRST punch, thrown in response to words, so something done in self defense.

And to climb a stage and do it publicly like that takes it to a whole other level. I can't imagine what he's like in private. Maybe he's not violent. Maybe he's not an abuser. But I think there's a chance he is.

People aren’t taking the context into consideration. They weren’t “just words.”

You’re welcome to your opinion. We can agree to disagree. This is tiring.

 

[Californian Elitist]

There's context for everything.

My answer could've been more in depth but was just outlining the basics of how I feel.

There are situations where violence is justified be it verbal or physical.

Also would love to meet up with the hive of miserable bastards, just don't have an AP and most likely won't until they have an option with no reservations.

Based on how you feel, and you’re welcome to your feelings, I’m an abuser that’s dangerous. Because anyone who puts their hands on another person, even if it’s just one time, is an abuser. Therefore, I am an abuser and for safety purposes, I should be kept away from. Safety first.

I’ve been mentioning context this entire time, but it’s been getting ignored.

 

[Californian Elitist]

This is the last thing I’m going to say regarding this topic, as it’s mentally exhausting.

Will Smith shouldn’t have gone up there and slapped Chris Rock. That was entirely wrong of him, and I truly wish he hadn’t done it because it has overshadowed his historic Oscar win. I found out he had won before finding out about the slapping incident, so my happiness was momentarily squashed afterwards. Chris Rock didn’t deserve that slap, but he’s come for the Smiths before. I love that he took the opportunity, as he always does, to mock black people in front of big, white audiences. And on top of that, joked about a black woman’s disease and loss of hair, hair being a historically sensitive topic for black women. Typical.

I don’t believe Will Smith should return his Oscar. Ban him from attending future ceremonies, sure, but taking away his Oscar would be very hypocritical of the Academy (unless there are strict guidelines about physical assault and earning an award). Given the context of the situation, I can and do understand why Smith may have felt that he needed to do what he did. Again, it wasn’t right, but I understand. I haven’t lost any respect for him at all. I admire his work as an actor and will not be canceling him, personally. I also understand Jaden Smith’s feelings towards the situation and refuse to criticize him for them.

The reactions from certain white celebrities are not only over-the-top, but are reminders that fear of black people is still prominent in this country. Would love to have this discussion outside of here with different people. I’ll leave it there.

I see human beings as very complex organisms. Things are not always black and white, as some people here seem to believe. Context is important. I don’t think Will Smith is an abuser who should take anger management classes and be feared. But, we’re all welcome to our opinions.

EDIT: I forgot to mention that in the right context and situation, to defend myself, I have no problem putting my hands on someone, whether harsh words are involved or not. I’ve stated this before.

-Dangerous Abuser

 

[CaptinEO]

Based on how you feel, and you’re welcome to your feelings, I’m an abuser that’s dangerous. Because anyone who puts their hands on another person, even if it’s just one time, is an abuser. Therefore, I am an abuser and for safety purposes, I should be kept away from. Safety first.

I’ve been mentioning context this entire time, but it’s been getting ignored.

Lets not get carried away.

Just because I generalized my thinking since I didn't feel the need to type out all the scenarios violence would be justified in, doesn't mean I believe those scenarios don't exist.

Context is a part of any situation. Everyone can agree that no one should steal food. But those same people would also change their mind if that person may be starving.

There's disclaimers and what ifs to every scenario.

 

[Parteecia]

This is the last thing I’m going to say regarding this topic, as it’s mentally exhausting.

Will Smith shouldn’t have gone up there and slapped Chris Rock. That was entirely wrong of him, and I truly wish he hadn’t done it because it has overshadowed his historic Oscar win. I found out he had won before finding out about the slapping incident, so my happiness was momentarily squashed afterwards. Chris Rock didn’t deserve that slap, but he’s come for the Smiths before. I love that he took the opportunity, as he always does, to mock black people in front of big, white audiences. And on top of that, joked about a black woman’s disease and loss of hair, hair being a historically sensitive topic for black women. Typical.

I don’t believe Will Smith should return his Oscar. Ban him from attending future ceremonies, sure, but taking away his Oscar would be very hypocritical of the Academy (unless there are strict guidelines about physical assault and earning an award). Given the context of the situation, I can and do understand why Smith may have felt that he needed to do what he did. Again, it wasn’t right, but I understand. I haven’t lost any respect for him at all. I admire his work as an actor and will not be canceling him, personally. I also understand Jaden Smith’s feelings towards the situation and refuse to criticize him for them.

The reactions from certain white celebrities are not only over-the-top, but are reminders that fear of black people is still prominent in this country. Would love to have this discussion outside of here with different people. I’ll leave it there.

I see human beings as very complex organisms. Things are not always black and white, as some people here seem to believe. Context is important. I don’t think Will Smith is an abuser who should take anger management classes and be feared. But, we’re all welcome to our opinions.

-Dangerous Abuser

Thank you. I appreciate that you took the time. I was about to ask you about context because I just wasn't getting it.

Context can matter. My boyfriend's ex once made him so mad that he put his fist through the wall. In the short time they were still together after that she treated him like he was an abuser. But the only time he ever hit anyone (9 years Air Force, career in rough and tumble oil industry) was when he was using a park urinal in a dicey area and 2 guys came up behind him with bad intentions. He uppercut the first and the other ran away. He had so much adrenaline going that he didnt realize until he got to his car that his dingle was still hanging out.

 

[CaptinEO]

In Will Smith's case do I think he goes around slapping people all day? No.

Do I think he reacts this way verbally or physically when emotional or under stress? It's now a definite possibility.

But he certainly lashed out in a way many believe to be inappropriate. Not the typical behavior of someone with that salary and pedigree.

It's because many people respected Will Smith that they feel betrayed in how he acted. I mean he was getting the most prestigious award by a room of his peers the same night he did this.

This week should've been him on all the morning shows talking about his big win and now he's facing one of the strangest PR disasters of any celebrity.

 

[ParkPeeker]

I should have made it more clear. Bragged about the suckerslap then kind of apologized the next day, after hearing there may be repercussions. And even then used the "look what you made me do" language of the abuser.

ETA: I'm saddened by the toxic masculinity being passed to the next generation. Will could've broken the cycle after seeing his father hit but he didn't. And now his son thinks hitting solves problems and is something to be proud of.

I don’t think we should make conclusions that Jaden now thinks hitting someone solves problems. I do get what you’re seeing, but you see everything about the Smiths in a negative light. Jaden’s words can be interpreted as being proud that his father let it be known that it wasn’t ok to make that kind of joke, yes he did it a wrong way, but he let it be known nonetheless. Will stated this isn’t the person he wants to be and “the devil coming out etc” I highly doubt the family is coming out of this thinking violence is a valid solution.

who have endured worse insults gracefully

I don’t know the context of that situation but people shouldn’t just “gracefully endure” jokes of this context. It should at least be met with a shout of disapproval. It shouldn’t get physical but it shouldn’t be just be ignored.

My point was that his son saw hitting as good and something to be proud of.

We absolutely will on this point. And hope that his son didn't learn the wrong lesson, that it's okay to suckerslap someone smaller than you for words.

I don’t think that’s what he meant. People keep thinking about the “violence” of the slap, but they can’t see that it was a disapproval of an unacceptable joke. All they see is the “violence” part not anything further.

I love that he took the opportunity, as he always does, to mock black people in front of big, white audiences. And on top of that, joked about a black woman’s disease and loss of hair, hair being a historically sensitive topic for black women. Typical.

Exactly. And we’ve stated this on this thread already and people just go back to, violence is never ok, whatever the joke, as if it was just a joke and as if this was just violence.

Chris knows black women and he used an unacceptable insult at Jada, he is aware about it, but plays the targeting off as just a joke. Everyone in the audience is just laughing (don’t even mention Will laughing as hypocritical or whatever cause it’s been addressed, go back and read) so it’s shown as not a big deal.

Yes Will shouldn’t have slapped him like I’ve said before, but y’all are seeing this as the most violent thing you’ve ever seen. And people are doing what ifs to more extreme violence. And no one is bringing up Chris’ joke, all the outrage is on Will.

All they see is Slap, violence. They aren’t seeing it without the physical aspect. They aren’t seeing that it’s ALSO a “no you can’t do that” message. So it just becomes this simplified garbage take of Violence vs Joke. No one is seeing the slap further than just a “violent act” and the “joke” gets heavily heavily downplayed, no matter how much we explain, cause of the “violence.” Very frustrating. Hopefully it all dies down soon and celebrities stop saying the same exhausting take.

 

[Californian Elitist]

I don’t think we should make conclusions that Jaden now thinks hitting someone solves problems. I do get what you’re seeing, but you see everything about the Smiths in a negative light. Jaden’s words can be interpreted as being proud that his father let it be known that it wasn’t ok to make that kind of joke, yes he did it a wrong way, but he let it be known nonetheless. Will stated this isn’t the person he wants to be and “the devil coming out etc” I highly doubt the family is coming out of this thinking violence is a valid solution.


I don’t know the context of that situation but people shouldn’t just “gracefully endure” jokes of this context. It should at least be met with a shout of disapproval. It shouldn’t get physical but it shouldn’t be just be ignored.


I don’t think that’s what he meant. People keep thinking about the “violence” of the slap, but they can’t see that it was a disapproval of an unacceptable joke. All they see is the “violence” part not anything further.


Exactly. And we’ve stated this on this thread already and people just go back to, violence is never ok, whatever the joke, as if it was just a joke and as if this was just violence.

Chris knows black women and he used an unacceptable insult at Jada, he is aware about it, but plays the targeting off as just a joke. Everyone in the audience is just laughing (don’t even mention Will laughing as hypocritical or whatever cause it’s been addressed, go back and read) so it’s shown as not a big deal.

Yes Will shouldn’t have slapped him like I’ve said before, but y’all are seeing this as the most violent thing you’ve ever seen. And people are doing what ifs to more extreme violence. And no one is bringing up Chris’ joke, all the outrage is on Will.

All they see is Slap, violence. They aren’t seeing it without the physical aspect. They aren’t seeing that it’s ALSO a “no you can’t do that” message. So it just becomes this simplified garbage take of Violence vs Joke. No one is seeing the slap further than just a “violent act” and the “joke” gets heavily heavily downplayed, no matter how much we explain, cause of the “violence.” Very frustrating. Hopefully it all dies down soon and celebrities stop saying the same exhausting take.

Thank you.

 

[DrAlice]

I have a question for Hollywood: Why do you invite comedians that make horrible jokes at your expense to your most important awards ceremony? Comedians to lighten the mood, sure. Comedians that are known for over-the-top mean-spirited jabs??? I don't get it. I have never found that stuff funny, and I don't understand why it has always been a presence at the award shows. That's probably why I don't watch and just google the results the next morning.

 

[Parteecia]

but you see everything about the Smiths in a negative light.

Watched his TV show some, saw a few of his movies. She was on some shows I watched. Don't follow celebrity gossip so all I knew about his family was when it seeped into the mainstream news, which for me is NY & LA Times, my local SCNG paper, and OTA broadcast news except for Fox. Wasn't my favorite to win but I had no problem with it. Saw or read a few pre Oscar puff pieces because they popped up in my regular media. I thought he seemed likeable and had nothing against him. But you're right, from my point of view he has handled everything from the joke on poorly.