The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
21stamps said:
Wow. I needed to hear this, even though I didn’t know it. Thank you.
I’m guilty as charged. It’s been a rough few days, I’ve stayed awake late, I’ve questioned if my career is worth missing so many important moments in his life. We have had talks about this before, I missed his Christmas Play this year, and 2 years ago we missed a hockey game that he was super excited for, all from me being stuck at work. Those times were rough for him, he didn’t understand, and all I can do is explain why Mom is at work so often.
It is what it is though, this our life, for better or worse.. and we just get past things like that when they happen. I’m home today, he’s finishing his math work and then we’re going to an amusement park before his baseball game- which I will be at. I hope that there is enough of these moments, including our moments at home during the other days, to outweigh the “but you missed “x”!”

He does appear to be doing better today and yesterday, he asked if I’d heard about the wait list this morning, but that was at 7am.. he hasn’t brought it up since. I know he’ll be ok in the end, regardless of what we hear. It’s almost like the Wait-List is dragging it out even more though. Luckily he’s not in school so doesn’t have to see the other 4 kids right now., that may sound like I’m avoiding instead of facing, but I honestly do this that it’s better for him to not have that in his face. If he doesn’t get called up, then he’ll have to deal with it once he goes back to school, and the Fall season is in full swing.

Thanks again, I appreciate your words. :)
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You're welcome. Sometimes we need to hear we're doing a good job and we don't have to be perfect. Also, be kind to yourself. You'd never use the words you say to yourself if you were talking to T. You would never ask him why he didn't do this or why he didn't do that better. You'd never call him a failure because he messed up. So don't do that to yourself.

Do they usually do the waitlist right away? Or is it something that could happen later? If he practices with the team in the Summer, would it show his coaches the dedication and drive they want to see? Would that help toward him being called up?
 
Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
It's been a busy few days! Sunday was a choir festival in the centrum, so DD and I went and watched a few choirs perform. Then Monday I had to work, and we had a trial rehearsal with our new choir director! Well, NOW he's our new director...he wasn't then. It went really well and everyone was pretty happy and he felt good about it too. It's a relief because the old director said he wasn't coming back after the Summer, so if it didn't work out, we were out of a director. If it hadn't been a good fit, I'm afraid we wouldn't be a group much longer.
Then Tuesday was packing day. Got DD off to camp this morning with her classmates. She was still not looking forward to it, so I hope she has a great time!! But my entire day yesterday was spent getting the last things from her list and helping her pack. I bought really cheapy stuff so it's no big deal if it doesn't come home again. So that's where I've been the last few days....busy busy busy!!! But, it's been a pretty productive and positive few days, so I can't complain!
 
MySmallWorldof4

MySmallWorldof4

Well-Known Member
Songbird76 said:
That wasn't his day. It doesn't mean he can't do it, just that he has more to learn.
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This was such an excellent post. It makes you think also going back to the club's mission statement that said they were into player development. That statement blows that right out of the water. They are not willing to let him learn. They are just about winning.
 
MySmallWorldof4

MySmallWorldof4

Well-Known Member
Songbird76 said:
It's been a busy few days! Sunday was a choir festival in the centrum, so DD and I went and watched a few choirs perform. Then Monday I had to work, and we had a trial rehearsal with our new choir director! Well, NOW he's our new director...he wasn't then. It went really well and everyone was pretty happy and he felt good about it too. It's a relief because the old director said he wasn't coming back after the Summer, so if it didn't work out, we were out of a director. If it hadn't been a good fit, I'm afraid we wouldn't be a group much longer.
Then Tuesday was packing day. Got DD off to camp this morning with her classmates. She was still not looking forward to it, so I hope she has a great time!! But my entire day yesterday was spent getting the last things from her list and helping her pack. I bought really cheapy stuff so it's no big deal if it doesn't come home again. So that's where I've been the last few days....busy busy busy!!! But, it's been a pretty productive and positive few days, so I can't complain!
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I thought your kids didn't have summer break yet. Is this camp just a short camp?
 
Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
MySmallWorldof4 said:
I thought your kids didn't have summer break yet. Is this camp just a short camp?
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We still have 5 weeks of school. It's a tradition in the Netherlands for the 6th graders to go to camp to celebrate their last year of elementary school. It's only a few days. We pick her up Saturday. Every school is different....some go for a week, but my son's school only goes overnight. And one of my DD's friends from the Christian school they went to before it closed goes to a different school and their camp is 3 nights at the school. They don't go anywhere. Whereas my DD's class went to Ameland, which is an island in the north, so they left just after 8:00 this morning and expected to get there at 1:30 in the afternoon. They take a bus to the port and then have to take a boat to the island.

They have a the tradition that each class goes on a day trip towards the end of the year...they go to a play gym or an amusement park, etc. And the 6th graders go to camp instead.
 
MySmallWorldof4

MySmallWorldof4

Well-Known Member
21stamps

21stamps

Well-Known Member
MySmallWorldof4 said:
This was such an excellent post. It makes you think also going back to the club's mission statement that said they were into player development. That statement blows that right out of the water. They are not willing to let him learn. They are just about winning.
Click to expand...

A mom of another waitlisted teammate sent me an email this morning, I responded that T was upset, and we’re still waiting to hear.

Here’s a portion of her response to that-

(Sorry the cut is weird so I’ll fill in the words)
“I tried to..”
4B0A0BC9-6D25-4C5D-A092-4230828E7B88.jpeg

She withdrew her son from one of the 4 waitlist spots. I’ve heard of the club she mentioned, but don’t know anyone who has played for them in the past. I looked at their website.. 1st words are-

We are a Soccer Club, NOT a Soccer Business.

It’s really making me think, the club T was playing for is definitely the most prestigious club in our Tri State area.. but really, is it helpful to all kids? Or do only some kids thrive in that kind of extreme-professional environment?
I told him about his teammate, and asked if he wants me to check and see if he can receive a private tryout., he said “No. If I can’t play with ___, then I don’t want to play for anyone. If I don’t get off the waitlist I’ll just try out again in the Fall.”

I hope that we’re doing the right thing here. I agree with you, the mission statement and their supposed “Club culture” is just words..not actions to prove those words..maybe once you’ve been playing with them for several years it is true,. I don’t know.
 
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FutureCEO

FutureCEO

Well-Known Member
21stamps said:
A mom of another waitlisted teammate sent me an email this morning, I responded that T was upset, and we’re still waiting to hear.

Here’s a portion of her response to that-

(Sorry the cut is weird so I’ll fill in the words)
“I tried to..”
View attachment 288082

She withdrew her son from one of the 4 waitlist spots. I’ve heard of the club she mentioned, but don’t know anyone who has played for them in the past. I looked at their website.. 1st words are-

We are a Soccer Club, NOT a Soccer Business.

It’s really making me think, the club T was playing for is definitely the most prestigious club in our Tri State area.. but really, is it helpful to all kids? Or do only some kids thrive in that kind of extreme-professional environment?
I told him about his teammate, and asked if he wants me to check and see if he can receive a private tryout., he said “No. If I can’t play with ___, then I don’t want to play for anyone. If I don’t get off the waitlist I’ll just try out again in the Fall.”

I hope that we’re doing the right thing here. I agree with you, the mission statement and their supposed “Club culture” is just words..not actions to prove those words..maybe once you’ve been playing with them for several years it is true,. I don’t know.
Click to expand...

Kids need to fail in some things. As much as we don't want them but it's true. There will be a whole generations of adults expecting everything handed to them. As in people today.
 
MySmallWorldof4

MySmallWorldof4

Well-Known Member
21stamps said:
A mom of another waitlisted teammate sent me an email this morning, I responded that T was upset, and we’re still waiting to hear.

Here’s a portion of her response to that-

(Sorry the cut is weird so I’ll fill in the words)
“I tried to..”
View attachment 288082

She withdrew her son from one of the 4 waitlist spots. I’ve heard of the club she mentioned, but don’t know anyone who has played for them in the past. I looked at their website.. 1st words are-

We are a Soccer Club, NOT a Soccer Business.

It’s really making me think, the club T was playing for is definitely the most prestigious club in our Tri State area.. but really, is it helpful to all kids? Or do only some kids thrive in that kind of extreme-professional environment?
I told him about his teammate, and asked if he wants me to check and see if he can receive a private tryout., he said “No. If I can’t play with ___, then I don’t want to play for anyone. If I don’t get off the waitlist I’ll just try out again in the Fall.”

I hope that we’re doing the right thing here. I agree with you, the mission statement and their supposed “Club culture” is just words..not actions to prove those words..maybe once you’ve been playing with them for several years it is true,. I don’t know.
Click to expand...
Hmmm. I think your friend is doing the right thing. It doesn't hurt to check them out. Sounds like T is still having issues with not making the cut. Tell him that if he really loves soccer, that maybe he should at least look at them, unless of course now he is afraid of getting judged by another coach. Maybe his confidence is just screwed up and that is why he said no, not because he doesn't want to play but is scared now. Maybe ask him if he is afraid?
 
21stamps

21stamps

Well-Known Member
FutureCEO said:
Kids need to fail in some things. As much as we don't want them but it's true. There will be a whole generations of adults expecting everything handed to them. As in people today.
Click to expand...

For sure, but in athletics is completely normal to try out for more than one team.. from youth to adult professional levels.

The strange thing about youth sports, especially youth soccer right now, is that coaches/clubs know that kids club hop, this has always happened for one reason or another, maybe a move, or friends, or just don’t like the current coach of your team.. but it’s become almost crazy now because they almost scout out the kids from other clubs, there are strict laws on that.. but it can still be done.

For example there is a “player’s right to choose” law. You can not switch during a season, but you can not be bound to a club indefinitely. Every one of the kid’s players cards have “current team”, but a right to choose attached to the application itself.

Trying to simplify this.,lol... let’s say an elite kid from one team gets second-hand invited to tryouts- this is legal.. or maybe the kid just does it on his own.. that kid knocks one player off or down, then it snowballs.. now let’s say two kids do this.. the coaches are trying to make the very best teams, and the clubs are trying to get the most awards and college D1 signings..

There’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s one reason why restricting yourself to only one club, such as my son is doing, is a mistake.

I don’t want to jinx us.. but wait-list is a horrible place to be. If you’re cut, you’re cut.. but wait-list is like living in purgatory!
If for one second I thought he didn’t have the skills, I would end this.. but all of the feedback we’ve had, and what I can see for myself.. is that the kid does have the skills, and not even on the bottom percentage of kids on his team.. he just has problems with nerves sometimes, imo- this is the age where a club SHOULD help a player like that if they are claiming that he does have the skills, and has displayed them over and over again, why wouldn’t they develop and help a kid like that thru those nerves.. especially after a season of so many cancelled training sessions and games. Any kid, not just mine. That mom said what I have been afraid to think.
 
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