The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

[Songbird76]

I agree. I do use it everyday. We don't have a toaster or toaster oven. I have issues with counters and counter space. I don't like anything on my counters. Every appliance needs to be put away after I use it except the breadmaker. So I never wanted a toaster. Dh said we probably put 5 years of use on it after the 13 months. Well worse comes to worse if it is an expensive fix then I will use my home warranty. Hoping it is something simple though.

Oh I so hope it's easy to fix! Just out of curiosity...do you have a microwave?

Plus if it is a smaller place, that means there is less to clean!

A lot of my friends bought big houses and sometimes I'm a little envious because honestly their houses are nicer than mine. But then I think about how much time I would spend cleaning a bigger place and then I'm okay.

Our house is pretty small, but I can't even keep IT clean. Although, to be fair, part of it in our house is that we have very little storage space, so it's always cluttered. If I had more space to put things in, it would be easier to clean.

Sounds about right. I also have basically decided that I want to keep my last name if I get married and would like to pass it on to my children. Of course, that is partially because I have a very unique, but lovely, last name. It's short, simple, easily pronounced, but I've never met anyone outside of my family with it. AND there's no one else who will likely pass it along. My dad's brother has no children and and most likely will not at this point, my dad's other brother has a little girl, and I can't see him and his wife having any more either. And there is a 99.9% chance my brother will be childless. So if I have children, I'd really like to pass on my last name. Especially if I marry someone with the last name of Jones or Smith or someone with an absurdly long last name. But I'm also open to the idea of a hyphen.

I also refuse to wear a white wedding dress, carry flowers down the aisle, be given away, or wear an engagement ring unless he also does. We could go with red. Red is what they wear in China. And I'm sorry, but I think the amount spent on rings is absurd, and even if he's paying, I'm not about to let him. If it's an heirloom, fine, but if we could buy a car with it, forget it.

I am seriously not a traditional sort of gal. It will be amazing if any man will have me. Of course, I'm also cheap on rings, so there's that.

I didn't want a diamond...not my thing, and I agree on the prices of rings. Ridiculous! Mine is a pearl, rather than diamond, and it's beautiful and much more "me". And my husband wore a ring, too. He still wears both his rings. And over here, they always hyphenate the woman's name, and it comes after the man's name. So like...John Smith and Suzy Jones get married, she becomes Suzy Smith-Jones. It has actually caused some problems for me, because we got married in the states, and of course I changed everything into my married name. Then I moved HERE, and like, my passport is in my married name, but they won't let you use your married name for official documents. So then I show my passport as ID, and they get confused because it's my married name.

This one. They have made others prior that have the same ick...

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/wOnp/yoplait-back-seat

I don't even get it...what's the point?

@Songbird76 I'm going to give you a little background into my family because I think maybe it will give you some insight into yours...

When I was little, I was such a daddy's girl. My mom always tells the story about how we were staying at Coronado Springs, and she was checking in, and my dad took me into the gift shop, and in the ten minutes that it took her to check in, he and I came walking out, and I had a little 101 Dalmations purse in my hand. And my mom was like "Really? She's got you wrapped around her finger." And we were like that for the longest time. After my brother was born, as I got older, we used to go off and do things just the two of us. We'd go in the parks late at night and ride all the big stuff, he'd take me to Orioles games without my mom and brother, you name it, we did it.

And then came the autism diagnosis with my brother.

I was 11 when he was diagnosed, and at first, nothing really changed. But then, the pressure to keep my grades up started coming on a lot harder, and it came on stronger and stronger in high school. Then came the pressure to be a lawyer, like him, and for a while, I was all for it, until I wasn't. I decided I was too emotional for a legal career, and the business side of it would bore me to tears. He was not happy about it. I later found out from my mom that his expectation was that I would join his firm. That was never happening, even if I did become a lawyer. Then, when I was applying for colleges, he wanted me to go to his alma mater. Well, his alma mater was not like it was 35 years ago. It was huge, basically a school where anyone could go, and I was not impressed. It was my safety school, and I told him that. I ended up picking a small, private school that he was not a fan of, but in the end, it was a perfect choice for me and I got an excellent education there, and I got a business degree, which made him happy, and me because it was a good choice. Then came more pressure for law school, and I was more firm that it wasn't happening.

But then I realized that I somehow stopped being daddy's girl and had become the son who was carrying on the family responsibility. And I thought, "When did this happen?"

And that's when it hit me: all of this started after the autism diagnosis. When he got a son, he had expectations for him. That he would be like him, that he would go to college, maybe to law school, carry on the family name. When my brother got the autism diagnosis, all of those hopes went out the window. Whether he realized it or not, he had lost his expectations for his son, and in doing so, he switched over those expectations to me. Which is a tricky position to be in. You're still the daughter who he feels like he has to protect, but you're suddenly the son carrying on the family responsibilities. I love my father and value his wisdom and advice. And I think because I'm not a daddy's girl, my mom and I are unusually close, which I wouldn't trade, but part of me misses being a daddy's girl.

Anyway, I thought this might give you some insight into what may be going on in your DH's mind, whether he realizes it or not. I know my dad doesn't realize it consciously. He might be reacting more to this recent diagnosis than you realize though.

That's something to consider....you're probably right. But I think it's also hard because everyone always says girls are daddy's little girl, but my daughter has never been like that. She loves her dad and they have a lot of fun together, but she is totally my mini-me. She looks like me, she acts like me, we have pretty much the same taste in clothing and TV shows and music...she sings like me. I think DH feels left out sometimes. He even mentioned that with Disney, that he gets it...she and I are so much alike, it's logical that we want to go do Carrots of the Pirabbean 6 times in a row....but he doesn't have the same thing with DS that I have with DD. I think that makes him feel a little lonely at times. I think he totally LOVED the afternoon at DLP where she went with him and they did all the thrill ride stuff that I can't do. At least they have SOMETHING they can do together, just the 2 of them.

That or you can fill the freezer with microwave food.

Nope...DS won't eat any of that. I don't know if you are a reader, but have you read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime? That's kind of my DS with food.

 

[Gabe1]

@figmentfan423 and today's lunch veggie style

 

[Songbird76]

Yep it all makes sense. I wouldn't go thinking about ruling out Disney. I can't imagine another place in the world you could vacation that so many special accommodations for guests with all sorts of special needs. Likely from what you have described here your son will make good progress in his new school since the staff seems to have tried and proven methods for both behavior and also actually receiving a good education. I have high hopes for him in his new environment they seem to 'get it.' Top that off with your DS having a higher IQ there are so many positive things happening now ya can't help but be excited for the future.

My DD being non verbal messed with her education. I had to fight real hard and ultimately had to be run for school board because the powers to be were Twits and either she was disabled or bright. Could not acknowledge that a child could be both. Her Dad was great Dad to them growing up, he went to sporting events, helped with homework, helped with science fairs coached sports teams. Still when something had to be done and done in business hours or school hours it was always me. I needed to get her to speech theraphy 3 times a week as a preschool. If they got sick I either needed to stay home, bring the kid to work with me which I did many times or get my Mom to take the kid which meant she had call out for the day and she was a teacher. Sometimes she'd take the kid with her to her school on days off from their school. So I understand the not totally connected to the situation when you are not living it during most of a childs awake hours. My DD was fortunate, she pretty much has overcome her disability through a lot of work between her speech pathologiest, her own effort and my time commitment so she would have every opportunity she could. Her graduation from high school and University graduating at the very top of her class couldn't have been a prouder moment for me and looking back it impressed herself if you know what I mean? I pray your son now that he doesn't fear getting beat up night and day at school he might too get that spark too and be able to enjoy learning 'cause prior he had himself in that survival mode. So I'd wait it out before you give up on Disney. You can also do what my friend does, she hires a college student to go along to Disney, they don't pay her a lot but she gets very nice vacations paid for. Lots of creative ways like hiring a baby sitter there but have that baby sitter tag along with you and your children. An extra set of hands.

I'm so glad your DD has overcome her issues. Gives me hope that DS will, too. So many people see it as being broken, and I don't see it that way. I just have to figure out what he needs so we can do what we need to do. And we've done physical therapy for the motor skills, psychology, self-esteem programs...and yep, it's usually me who takes him to everything. Sometimes, if we're really caught, DH can start early or work late a different day to come home and take him to something, but mostly it's me. Days like today are hard, because it was REALLY nasty weather...sleet and hail. So riding my bike 30 minutes to his school, and 30 minutes back, are tough. Well, it was mostly dry when I went to get him. It was later, when I was taking DD to GRID that was really bad. But, you do what you gotta do. Buck up, Sissypants!
Interesting thought about bringing a babysitter. I have to say, the first time we brought the kids to Disney, my friend came with us to the parks, and her Husband joined us a lot of the time, and it was really helpful having the extra hands! DD loved my friend and really wanted her to push her stroller, and DS was really fascinated with her husband and would hold his hand going across a parking lot without a fit like he threw if it was me. And if we could bring his therapist along, he'd probably have a GREAT time...she has a way of making things into a contest, or into a game, that he loves. She's so amazing with him. But I doubt I could afford THAT pay grade.

 

[Songbird76]

Picked up the new glasses today. I can DEFINITELY see signs and things more clearly...it's pretty nice. But it DOES mess with my peripherals, particularly in going down stairs. And for some reason, at first, it made the distance between my eyes and the floor seem greater, so I felt like I had been stretched. Now it's fine though. I think they suit me, but the kids both think it's weird seeing me with glasses.

 

[DryerLintFan]

Oh I so hope it's easy to fix! Just out of curiosity...do you have a microwave?

Our house is pretty small, but I can't even keep IT clean. Although, to be fair, part of it in our house is that we have very little storage space, so it's always cluttered. If I had more space to put things in, it would be easier to clean.

I didn't want a diamond...not my thing, and I agree on the prices of rings. Ridiculous! Mine is a pearl, rather than diamond, and it's beautiful and much more "me". And my husband wore a ring, too. He still wears both his rings. And over here, they always hyphenate the woman's name, and it comes after the man's name. So like...John Smith and Suzy Jones get married, she becomes Suzy Smith-Jones. It has actually caused some problems for me, because we got married in the states, and of course I changed everything into my married name. Then I moved HERE, and like, my passport is in my married name, but they won't let you use your married name for official documents. So then I show my passport as ID, and they get confused because it's my married name.

I don't even get it...what's the point?

That's something to consider....you're probably right. But I think it's also hard because everyone always says girls are daddy's little girl, but my daughter has never been like that. She loves her dad and they have a lot of fun together, but she is totally my mini-me. She looks like me, she acts like me, we have pretty much the same taste in clothing and TV shows and music...she sings like me. I think DH feels left out sometimes. He even mentioned that with Disney, that he gets it...she and I are so much alike, it's logical that we want to go do Carrots of the Pirabbean 6 times in a row....but he doesn't have the same thing with DS that I have with DD. I think that makes him feel a little lonely at times. I think he totally LOVED the afternoon at DLP where she went with him and they did all the thrill ride stuff that I can't do. At least they have SOMETHING they can do together, just the 2 of them.


Nope...DS won't eat any of that. I don't know if you are a reader, but have you read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime? That's kind of my DS with food.

My daughter is a mini me, too. Ever time she gets mouthy with me, I think about how much worse this is going to be when she picks up and perfects sarcasm. Because sarcasm is my primary language.

 

[Gabe1]

Maybe you passed it on over here....when I picked up DD to take her to Musical Theater, it was hailing so hard. I ended up having to wrap my head in my scarf because it stung so much with little pellets hitting my face.

Ouch! And our Little Miss @MinnieM123 loves this why?

 

[Gabe1]

My daughter is a mini me, too. Ever time she gets mouthy with me, I think about how much worse this is going to be when she picks up and perfects sarcasm. Because sarcasm is my primary language.

My DD are joined at the hip, always have been. My DS and I are closer than many sons are with their Moms. I am his confidant and he bounces his thoughts off me. We get along so well and he is my guardian protector.

 

[Gabe1]

As far as I'm concerned, it's to benefit Disney only--they can cut down on CMs to count the cash at the end of the day, so to speak. I have no problem with people who don't want to use cash; I just don't like having only one option (electronic) to pay.

I've been in the parks when tap to pay is broken. I've been at Kiosks when they only took cash because of tech error the were having. Then what people?

 

[Gabe1]

Nope I don't like that at all!!!!! What a PITA it will be to keep gift cards for kids loaded with small amounts

And do you have to buy a gift card with a credit card? Honestly when Disney sends that E-mail out to guests long already booked at Animal Lodge wonder how many will be annoyed? Wonder how many will ask to be transferred. And if your one of the many DVC members that does pay cash for some things I wouldn't want to be the trial sampling. Given the high cost of AKL my thought is Disney should simply say, Welcome Home and accept anyway the guest wants to part with their money. Who would have thunk you'd need a credit card to purchase a bottle of water?

 

[MinnieM123]

Ouch! And our Little Miss @MinnieM123 loves this why?

Oh, I would love to stroll along that lovely wooden bridge now . . .

 

[ajrwdwgirl]

Oh, yes, that one. That one I'm lukewarm on. Whoever wants to marry me should yes, go talk to my parents (and both, not just dad) and ask for their blessing. But blessing, not permission. There is a difference. And the only reason I would say to do that is because I don't think my father would ever fully respect someone who didn't come talk to him before marrying me, and that's just not good. I don't want to start off like that. So we're going to have to do that one. Not thrilled, but okay.

My husband talked to my parents before he proposed to me and if he hadn't I think I would have been disappointed for some of the reasons you talked about. I think with him talking to both of my parents (which he did in person) it showed a lot of respect for my parents, family, and me. It was like he was more seeking their acceptance to join the family and reassure them of how much he cared for and respected me. To me it was a very manly move for him to be able to express his love for me to my family. My parents were very touched that he came to talk to them, they already liked him but they liked that they were included in such a momentous moment.

For our wedding we/I was pretty traditional. I love flowers so I wouldn't have dreamed of having a wedding without a bouquet. My dress, I had a nice one but it was simple and really not that important to me. I also wanted a really great cake, because I like cake. I wore a veil, not over my face, but because it helped me feel like a "princess" on my special day. My husband didn't care what his ring looked like and encouraged me to get him the cheapest one possible! I wanted it at Disney and he was adamant it be in a church, we compromised and had it at my home church and took our honeymoon in WDW. So as someone said (@dryerlintfan) some things have to be compromised.

It is interesting to hear about how everyone sees the different elements of a wedding and nice that everyone has their own beliefs. And that is totally fine for people do start new traditions and disregard others, it is their wedding.

But what I totally disagree or can't with is how much money people spend on wedding and how crazy some brides and grooms get about it. My wedding was small and we kept it to a very tight budget and we had a fantastic time. Sometimes I think people get so caught up in the wedding part that they forget to spend time and money on what actually matters.....the marriage and the partnership of the two people dedicating themselves to loving and caring for one another.

 

[ajrwdwgirl]

Update on the oven. Just for the heck of it, I decided to turn it on this morning. After about 30 seconds of it not beeping the error code I watched the temp go from 100 to 350 without issue. I didn't cancel the repair, cause you know, fluke? In any case repair guy still not here. Was told he would be here between 8 and 5. Don't you love it? When I call I just get a voicemail box. Well I am out of here at 4:30 for cheer practice assuming they don't close for the night, so hopefully he will come before. Part of me is thinking he will not show up. Kind of annoyed because I wanted to make muffins and couldn't because the oven needs to be cool to be looked at.

Probably a good idea not to bake in the oven until it is checked out just in case the temperature isn't calibrated correctly with this error. No need to risk food poisoning or anything.

 

[Elsa]

Had a nice time with my PAC person today

 

[DryerLintFan]

My husband talked to my parents before he proposed to me and if he hadn't I think I would have been disappointed for some of the reasons you talked about. I think with him talking to both of my parents (which he did in person) it showed a lot of respect for my parents, family, and me. It was like he was more seeking their acceptance to join the family and reassure them of how much he cared for and respected me. To me it was a very manly move for him to be able to express his love for me to my family. My parents were very touched that he came to talk to them, they already liked him but they liked that they were included in such a momentous moment.

For our wedding we/I was pretty traditional. I love flowers so I wouldn't have dreamed of having a wedding without a bouquet. My dress, I had a nice one but it was simple and really not that important to me. I also wanted a really great cake, because I like cake. I wore a veil, not over my face, but because it helped me feel like a "princess" on my special day. My husband didn't care what his ring looked like and encouraged me to get him the cheapest one possible! I wanted it at Disney and he was adamant it be in a church, we compromised and had it at my home church and took our honeymoon in WDW. So as someone said (@dryerlintfan) some things have to be compromised.

It is interesting to hear about how everyone sees the different elements of a wedding and nice that everyone has their own beliefs. And that is totally fine for people do start new traditions and disregard others, it is their wedding.

But what I totally disagree or can't with is how much money people spend on wedding and how crazy some brides and grooms get about it. My wedding was small and we kept it to a very tight budget and we had a fantastic time. Sometimes I think people get so caught up in the wedding part that they forget to spend time and money on what actually matters.....the marriage and the partnership of the two people dedicating themselves to loving and caring for one another.

Agreed!! We pinched pennies for our wedding and took an extravagant honeymoon backpacking in Patagonia. We had so much fun at our wedding, but even more on our honeymoon!

 

[MinnieM123]

My husband talked to my parents before he proposed to me and if he hadn't I think I would have been disappointed for some of the reasons you talked about. I think with him talking to both of my parents (which he did in person) it showed a lot of respect for my parents, family, and me. It was like he was more seeking their acceptance to join the family and reassure them of how much he cared for and respected me. To me it was a very manly move for him to be able to express his love for me to my family. My parents were very touched that he came to talk to them, they already liked him but they liked that they were included in such a momentous moment.

For our wedding we/I was pretty traditional. I love flowers so I wouldn't have dreamed of having a wedding without a bouquet. My dress, I had a nice one but it was simple and really not that important to me. I also wanted a really great cake, because I like cake. I wore a veil, not over my face, but because it helped me feel like a "princess" on my special day. My husband didn't care what his ring looked like and encouraged me to get him the cheapest one possible! I wanted it at Disney and he was adamant it be in a church, we compromised and had it at my home church and took our honeymoon in WDW. So as someone said (@dryerlintfan) some things have to be compromised.

It is interesting to hear about how everyone sees the different elements of a wedding and nice that everyone has their own beliefs. And that is totally fine for people do start new traditions and disregard others, it is their wedding.

But what I totally disagree or can't with is how much money people spend on wedding and how crazy some brides and grooms get about it. My wedding was small and we kept it to a very tight budget and we had a fantastic time. Sometimes I think people get so caught up in the wedding part that they forget to spend time and money on what actually matters.....the marriage and the partnership of the two people dedicating themselves to loving and caring for one another.

That's really nice. I'm enjoying all these wedding conversations, and how people have their own ideas on what works for them.

I was thinking about how some men speak with the woman's father, which is a considerate gesture. In my case, it was moot, because my parents had passed away. But one of my brothers asked (now hubs) if he planned on marrying me. He said yes. My brother told him, "Good, welcome to the family, but just don't ever mess up Christmas for her!" (That was his approval blessing to hubs at that time.)

 

[donaldtoo]

Greek salad and a gyro (plane ) wrap for din-din tonight...!!!!!

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Oh I so hope it's easy to fix! Just out of curiosity...do you have a microwave?

Our house is pretty small, but I can't even keep IT clean. Although, to be fair, part of it in our house is that we have very little storage space, so it's always cluttered. If I had more space to put things in, it would be easier to clean.

I didn't want a diamond...not my thing, and I agree on the prices of rings. Ridiculous! Mine is a pearl, rather than diamond, and it's beautiful and much more "me". And my husband wore a ring, too. He still wears both his rings. And over here, they always hyphenate the woman's name, and it comes after the man's name. So like...John Smith and Suzy Jones get married, she becomes Suzy Smith-Jones. It has actually caused some problems for me, because we got married in the states, and of course I changed everything into my married name. Then I moved HERE, and like, my passport is in my married name, but they won't let you use your married name for official documents. So then I show my passport as ID, and they get confused because it's my married name.

I don't even get it...what's the point?

That's something to consider....you're probably right. But I think it's also hard because everyone always says girls are daddy's little girl, but my daughter has never been like that. She loves her dad and they have a lot of fun together, but she is totally my mini-me. She looks like me, she acts like me, we have pretty much the same taste in clothing and TV shows and music...she sings like me. I think DH feels left out sometimes. He even mentioned that with Disney, that he gets it...she and I are so much alike, it's logical that we want to go do Carrots of the Pirabbean 6 times in a row....but he doesn't have the same thing with DS that I have with DD. I think that makes him feel a little lonely at times. I think he totally LOVED the afternoon at DLP where she went with him and they did all the thrill ride stuff that I can't do. At least they have SOMETHING they can do together, just the 2 of them.


Nope...DS won't eat any of that. I don't know if you are a reader, but have you read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime? That's kind of my DS with food.

Yes. We have a microwave. I actually used the oven to bake muffins this afternoon. It worked fine. No worry about food poisoning if the temp wasn’t exact cause they are vegan and fat free. So no eggs, butter, or milk. Yes they taste awesome! I called the repair guy and left a message. I have heard nothing back. I will need to call GE again if he doesn’t contact me tomorrow.

 

[donaldtoo]

This is an interesting question!! On international flights, you know you're in for a long wait on the landing (customs) but I've never paid any specific attention to getting through security there. I can tell you that Italy, by far, took the longest for me to get through (3 hours!!) and that United Arab Emirates had the most thorough screening I've ever been through (Scanned our technology devices and did a thermal check on us to make sure we didn't have swine flu)

Got distracted and forgot to reply to this one last night...

On our cruise last month we were told you could take either your drivers license/state ID or your passport, or both, with you to get on and off the ship at our ports of call. We chose to leave our drivers licenses in the cabin safe and take our passports 'cause DWifey wanted us to get our passports stamped. Funny thing is, all they ever wanted to see was our room key/cards. They had a crew member before the checkpoint telling everyone to get their room keys out all 3 times off the ship and all 3 times back on.

Going through customs to get on the ship was considerably more time-consuming. There was a lot of keyboarding going on.
Going through customs to get back in the US was a bit different.
There were, IIRC, 6-8 lines. They split us up into groups of two and sent us to 3 different lines. Oldest DD and SonIL in one, DWifey and youngest DD in one, and myself and DS in the other.
Our line (DS and myself, of course) moved the slowest! We were still about 8 pairings/groups back when Oldest DD and SonIL and oldest DD got through, and DWifey and youngest DD were about 4 back. DS and I finally were next in line, and then the real fun happened...
The lady in the group right in front of us was being quietly scrutinized up one side and down the other.
This, for some reason, took no less than 10 minutes.
So I'm thinkin' "What might they put us through?!"
It was finally our turn...
We presented our passports and were told to have a nice day and sent on our way...like poop through a goose...!!!!!

Have no clue what the problem was with that one lady, but, it was obviously eventually resolved.
Interesting international travel experience, all the way around...!!!

 

[donaldtoo]

Both DDs wore, pretty much, the same outfit to work today...!!!

 

[Gabe1]

Oh, a veil, another thing I forgot I will not be doing. My thought on marriage is that we will be entering a partnership. I will not be owned by him. My father is not giving me to him, he will not lift the veil to reveal his prize, and before the wedding, I will not be his property and will not wear a ring to show that unless he also wants to wear one.

I probably will have to do some sort of ceremony even though I would love to elope because my mother would never forgive me...I honestly only have a few close female friends, so I would probably just have a maid of honor or two and that would be it, then he could have a best man. Small wedding on the Chesapeake with close family and friends sounds about right to me without getting super pricey.

That sounds like a nice plan for a wedding. For the life of me I didn't understand my Mom and that need for a veil over the face, my Dad would have likely ripped the whole thing out of my head. My Sister had maybe 60 people, she was married out of state. She wore a solid white Laura Ashley plain white cotton short sleeved dress calf length. She looked so cute. I a baby pink Laura Ashley too and I think it was the same dress. My DS who was two years old and my Dad had on identical Tux's on. My sons prize for standing up there was that soft sided Fisher Price Doctor bag. He marched around the wedding and reception with his new Doctor bag. She was married at the Chapel on Campus where she went to law school and married by a judge. She knew lots of Judges so that was not a problem.