The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

StarWarsGirl

StarWarsGirl

Well-Known Member
In the Parks
No
Cesar R M said:
yes, but you need to go see the CMs..
TONDq.gif
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No, ya don't.

You just pick a ride from the list and can use your fastpass until the end of day.

The email will look like this:
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Gabe1

Gabe1

Ivory Tower Squabble EST 2011. WINDMILL SURVIVOR
figmentfan423 said:
My baby is mad at me yet again. Tonight we're going to see some friends that live a bit of a drive from here so we'll pick the boys up so we don't have to wait for buses. My younger ds said he didn't want to go and could go to one of his friend's houses. I don't like this age at all!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Yep and it will not end. About that age we made a conscious effort to pick our battles with our kids. Obviously at the 11th hour he is going.

Still we had to come to terms with our social life. While once we did drag them everywhere with us socially or drop them at my folks, adolescents are a completely different and when I put myself in their shoes I kinda got it. When small they play with whoever is around wherever they are at. By the time they hit the more awkward ages they tend to resent having to go sit at other people's homes or being social with people they no longer have a real connection with and the kids in that home maybe just as bored with the idea of having to be nice to the company's kids. We did start to find other things for our kids to do when went off with our friends and they were still to young to be left home alone plus way past being shuffled to Grandma's. It is a tough few years trying to be mindful of not making them miserable and maintaining a good rapport with them. It was really a pick my battle thing, did I really need to insist they go sit at our friends home with us or could I give them the choice and arrange for them to go to their friends home instead. I found I had a better time without them when socializing with friends. Hold on tight, it only becomes more interesting. I laugh at my friends that tried to re-establish curfews for their college aged kids when they were home on breaks. I so let that go. My new request was if you are not coming home at all shoot me a text.
 
Goofyernmost

Goofyernmost

Well-Known Member
I had more problems after they finished college. I tried to give them some transition time, to get a job, and find a place to live, because as soon as they reached 21, I felt that my obligation to support, financially, was coming close to finishing up. My youngest started to get in the habit of spending the night at her boyfriends place, then he would drop her off in the morning, where she came in and used the shower, ate breakfast, lunch and dinner and then left again when he was done work.

Not only did it bother me that I felt she was being treated like a girl (of the trade), but, what a racket her boyfriend had going for him. We sat down with her and told her that this was not working for us. We loved her and because of that it really hurt to think she was being used like this. She assured us it was really love. In that case, I said, there should be no problem with you two sharing all day, everyday. If he felt the same, then at least make the commitment to share your lives, either by marriage or cohabitation, but the idea of running back home to Mommy and Daddy in the morning was not working.

She moved out and into his place that week. I was fine with that, in fact, I helped her move. I don't have any desire to make moral judgements about how two adults live their lives and I felt amazingly better not witnessing or being used myself for the purpose of "being handy". They lived together for about 3 years and got married. Eighteen years later (21 total), they are still together and doing well. All of us were a lot happier with those arrangements. (Except MY Mother who was totally flabbergasted about it. Good thing it was my daughter and not hers.)

I still am involved with both my girls when situations arise. It was a difficult thing for all of us, but, in our case I think that it established that I trusted them to take care of their own lives, not be dependent on us forever and trust that I will tell them if I think they are heading in a direction that will be harmful to them. Not my business anymore and I would never interfere without being asked, but, they know I am there to help if I can. So, even though they are both over 40 now, I'm here to tell you that parenting never really ends until you do. I am proud that they feel they can come to me with any problem and that they know, I consider them adult equals. That I will help when needed and not as a limitless safety net.

Young teens, on the other hand, just require, in my mind, a certain degree of responsibility and trust that they will do the right thing. What we have as expectations have a tendency to come true, both good and bad. If we think they will screw up and they know it, there is no reason to be expecting anymore from themselves. If we expect them to achieve good things, they will also expect that of themselves. Individual mileage my vary. :)
 
Cesar R M

Cesar R M

Well-Known Member
Songbird76 said:
And they let his wife go, apparently. The news here this morning said he told them he was afraid, and that's why he brought in the guns. They were looking for his wife now.
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afraid of what? being assaulted by anti muslims.. in a disney area hotel? o_o

Songbird76 said:
Yep, it was a case of misidentification. But that seems fishy to me....he only wants to protect himself, so he brings a large amount of ammo with him, and his wife/partner disappears and can't be found?
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agree. very fishy!
 
Cesar R M

Cesar R M

Well-Known Member
Gabe1 said:
You can spend thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition at your kids university on one course. The University of Kentucky has one such course that can make parents squirm. Tacos Literacy, Public Advocacy, In Mexican food in the US South :101

Social Science of Mexican food in the south, taking tours of Mexican Restaurants, taking Taco Tours, Writing food reviews and posting them to Instagram. The professor of the course says alot of the course is Food Journalism. :eek:

To me it looks like Social Media everyday just without thousands of dollars in tuition. :cyclops:
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I actually applaud that professor.. teaching kids what is a real taco and what is not.. hint. taco bell is not a real taco :hilarious:
 
catmom46

catmom46

Well-Known Member
Goofyernmost said:
I had more problems after they finished college. I tried to give them some transition time, to get a job, and find a place to live, because as soon as they reached 21, I felt that my obligation to support, financially, was coming close to finishing up. My youngest started to get in the habit of spending the night at her boyfriends place, then he would drop her off in the morning, where she came in and used the shower, ate breakfast, lunch and dinner and then left again when he was done work.

Not only did it bother me that I felt she was being treated like a girl (of the trade), but, what a racket her boyfriend had going for him. We sat down with her and told her that this was not working for us. We loved her and because of that it really hurt to think she was being used like this. She assured us it was really love. In that case, I said, there should be no problem with you two sharing all day, everyday. If he felt the same, then at least make the commitment to share your lives, either by marriage or cohabitation, but the idea of running back home to Mommy and Daddy in the morning was not working.

She moved out and into his place that week. I was fine with that, in fact, I helped her move. I don't have any desire to make moral judgements about how two adults live their lives and I felt amazingly better not witnessing or being used myself for the purpose of "being handy". They lived together for about 3 years and got married. Eighteen years later (21 total), they are still together and doing well. All of us were a lot happier with those arrangements. (Except MY Mother who was totally flabbergasted about it. Good thing it was my daughter and not hers.)

I still am involved with both my girls when situations arise. It was a difficult thing for all of us, but, in our case I think that it established that I trusted them to take care of their own lives, not be dependent on us forever and trust that I will tell them if I think they are heading in a direction that will be harmful to them. Not my business anymore and I would never interfere without being asked, but, they know I am there to help if I can. So, even though they are both over 40 now, I'm here to tell you that parenting never really ends until you do. I am proud that they feel they can come to me with any problem and that they know, I consider them adult equals. That I will help when needed and not as a limitless safety net.

Young teens, on the other hand, just require, in my mind, a certain degree of responsibility and trust that they will do the right thing. What we have as expectations have a tendency to come true, both good and bad. If we think they will screw up and they know it, there is no reason to be expecting anymore from themselves. If we expect them to achieve good things, they will also expect that of themselves. Individual mileage my vary. :)
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I'm glad it worked out for your daughter. I wonder if it wasn't so much her boyfriend thought it was a great set-up for himself, but your daughter didn't think she needed to move out yet?
 

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