Son #1 married a girl who's parents are well off but practical the wedding I am guessing was in the 30K range (yikes) Son #2 married an only child so her parents went all out I'm guessing in the same range maybe more. When wife and I got married she made her own dress (was still sewing it the night before) and we had a wedding that probably didn't cost more than (reception) $1500 maybe 20 people family and a few friends. Times have changed---- have always thought if your going to spend that kind of money for a big wedding give me the cash for a down payment on a house. Then again I have always been practical--- wife says cheap I say frugal
I think you and I are around the same age, give or take a few, and that is like our wedding.
Her father had money, but was tighter then the bark on a tree. Her gown was handmade by a family friend, we got married in the University of Vermont chapel (cost about $25). I sprung for the flowers and the organist at the church. All he sprung for was the reception and that was as sparse as one could find, they used a meeting room at Holiday Inn, had dinner. One entree, Chicken, if you didn't like chicken you don't eat. The cake was nice but nothing all that fancy. No open bar, in fact no bar at all and no music, canned or otherwise. When we left the reception we had to drive our landlady back to her apartment.
One other funny thing that happened was the Priest that married us wasn't at all used to doing weddings. He was nervous, I guess, because he got both our names wrong. In the part where he says, "we are gathered her today to join Richard and Gloria in holy matrimony"! He got the first letter in each of our names correct, but, not even close on the rest of it. I thought my Mother was going to faint. The setup was that during that part we were about one step higher and we were facing the congregation. After that point we were to step down and change places with him with our backs to the people. As he stepped up I told him our names. I don't think that helped his nerves, but he publicly corrected it and continued on with no more errors. The right names did turn up on the Certificate of Marriage.
I guess I wasn't much better when my daughters married. I think not counting the gowns the rest cost me about $3500.00 total for each. It also helped that it was 20+ years ago. They never asked for anymore then that. I did pay for their Honeymoons so I guess that should be included, but, it was likely I would have had to spring for a wedding gift anyway. The first one married got a trip to WDW (their request) and the second wanted a Caribbean Cruise. That last one was a nightmare due to a freak Spring storm in good old Vermont. It was 75 degrees during the wedding and when we arrived at the reception. By the time we left, not more then 5 hours later, there was over a foot of snow on the ground. Anyone care to ask how long I had to think about it before I moved south?