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sweetpee_1993

Well-Known Member
To avoid further hijacking of this thread....so sorry @dreamlady85 ....here goes the sordid tale of the Remy footwear...

Once upon a time...on the beautiful Disney Dream...on an ocean far, far away.... Just kidding! LOL!

Basically, I showed up for our dinner Remy reservation a little early w/one of my roomies who was also on the reservation. The young female greeter at the podium said something along the lines of, "I have your reservation but I won't be able to allow you to go into the restaurant because of your attire. We have a dress code requirement for Remy." I was shocked. We both were wearing nice dresses with sandals not so drastically different from what I wore in this exact same restaurant on the exact same ship just a year ago. I asked for more info. "What's not acceptable?" "Well, um, your shoes. They need to be closed or maybe just not between your toes." Really? Because the black strappy heels I wore last year were between the toes not unlike what I was currently wearing. If anything, the white strappy sandals I was currently wearing covered more of my foot than the black strappy heels I wore last year since these had a strap that covered the back of my heel. We went back and forth with this conversation trying to nail down specifically what was unacceptable about the shoes because, let's face it, I didn't bring my entire wardrobe on vacation and was concerned I didn't even have anything with me on the ship that would work. I'll be honest, I don't own a wide variety of dressy shoes at all because in my normal life unless someone gets married or dies I don't wear anything besides sneakers, flip flops, or the occasional Ugg boots the 3 days a year we have cold temps.

During this entire exchange that took place at the podium I could see a few ladies beyond in Meridian watching and listening. The whole thing took place out in the wide open, not at a hushed tone or anything. Yeah, it was kinda embarrassing. No, it WAS embarrassing.

So then the young lady said, "Let me ask. Just one moment." She walked a few steps away and caught another female crew member passing by. She quietly said something to her. 2nd person stepped into full view of us, looked us up & down a few times with a judging/calculating expression, then shook her head. Another crew member came near and the same thing ensued. Veeeeery uncomfortable to be eyeballed up & down by people with very stern expressions then getting the disapproving head shake. So at this point I felt pretty much like I might as well have been standing there naked before the judging panel. Such FUN! All the while the ladies in Meridian watched everything and whispered. Magical experience, indeed. It sure set the tone for an amazing dining experience, right? :grumpy:

The young lady greeter returned and questioned if we had other shoes that were a bit dressier. Well, I might but they were horribly uncomfortable and the dress I brought them to wear with was still in need of dry cleaning (when I get on the Fantasy less than a week from this very evening). We were offered loaner-shoes and asked what size we wear. No. flippin. WAY am I down with loaner foot funk. That's not happening. We opted to trudge the walk-of-shame all the way back to our room to put on shoes that didn't match what we were wearing all that well because we didn't want to be no-shows for the rest of our dining companions. Honestly, if I'd given it better thought this might have been the better option for the others because it was going to be a real challenge to enjoy this meal now. Whatever.

So uncomfortable, semi-coordinating shoes on our feet we returned to the Podium of Judgement to see if we'd be able to pass inspection. The Gatekeeper granted us entry and we joined our dining companions in Meridian. We sat down and started to share the tale of our inappropriate shoes. The Gatekeeper gal passed by and made an obviously over-zealous point to compliment our much nicer shoes (they really weren't all that different, actually, but whatever). "Those look sooooo much better with your dresses..." Of course I couldn't keep my mouth shut, "Well, they're also extremely uncomfortable and hurt my feet." To my surprise, the gal then informed me, "Oh that's okay. When you get to your table you can just slip them off under the table so you'll be more comfortable."

o_O

Really? You just put us thru this entire ordeal nit-picking our shoes to inform us that once we get to our table the footwear transforms to optional? Really???? Color me perplexed. :facepalm: I politely declined this invitation to kick off my shoes and said, "I'm not taking any chances." :grumpy:

We were then invited to our table. I really was trying to mentally push my brain out of this dark cloud and get on with the evening. I swear, I tried with all my might. I sat in my chair like a good girl and didn't even kick those mean shoes off for the entire meal. All 4 hours of it. No, I never got up to use the restroom. Mostly I was creeped out by the escorting thing but also I wasn't walking on my aching hoofs in those shoes unless I absolutely had to. They really do hurt my feet. Every step I take in those shoes is like a new explosion of ouch that starts in the ball of my foot and shoots upwards to my shins & calves. It hurts. That's the truth.

So I sat thru the meal. Towards the end my belly was so full and I was so delighted with the dessert courses (worth the price of admission all by themselves) that I truly felt like that black cloud that I started out with had drifted away for good.

Now, where I was sitting was with my back to a window faced into the dining room so I had a clear forward view of several tables. I don't make it a habit to examine other people. I actually have a bad habit of being oblivious to other people as some of you may already know. LOL!

We sat waiting (what felt like an eternity) for the checks to be settled when I noticed another lady at the little private table in the glass-enclosed room where the wine is kept directly in front of me stand up and leave the restaurant probably to go to the restroom. As she walked out from behind her table into the open I was shocked. She was wearing a casual cotton, tshirt material top with a few buttons at the neck/chest, bright floral casual pants, and single-strap flat flip-flop style sandals. The outfit, in all honesty, might've barely achieved cruise casual for the MDR but it wasn't anywhere near what I now understood as Remy-appropriate. In fact, I have several preppy-style Lilly shorts outfits that are much dressier than what this lady was wearing.

And that was all she wrote, folks. Oh, the black cloud brought friends upon his return. I believe they were more like Cat 5 hurricane level. I wasn't just annoyed. I wasn't just angry. I wouldn't even say I was furious. Nope, I was DEFCON 1 enraged. I was trembling. I was nauseated. I was quite literally seeing red. I glared at my empty water glass in front of me with visions of snatching it up and hurling it across the room. I went from near perfectly content to I'm-gonna-break-some-$h!t in less than 3 seconds. But I was good! I mentioned it to my dining companions. I think, but I'm not sure, everyone got a look at who I had seen. At least a few people told me I should say something but I couldn't do it. I knew if I opened my mouth it was not going to be pretty. If I started to let it out it was going to go very badly and I didn't want to embarrass my dining companions that way. I knew without a doubt I'd be a yelling, cursing fireball. If I got started I knew I was mad enough that there was no predicting how far I'd go. Yep, I have a really, reeeeeaaally bad temper. I haven't lost it to the point I was totally out of control in many years and, in the past, my temper has caused me injury. I just couldn't allow myself to go there this evening, not when I was with real ladies (not pretend ones like me) that I respect immensely, who I needed to be composed in the presence of. So I closed my mouth, smiled, and kept on moving.

We stood and left the restaurant. We were handed a rose and box of chocolates at some point between sitting at the table and exiting. I know as soon as I walked out the door I deposited my rose in the nearest garbage can, handed my box of chocolates to another of my dining companions, and walked off to the stairs alone. I was sooooo afraid I'd open my mouth and ruin any semblance of decorum I'd pretended to possess.

I returned to my stateroom where I changed into my pajamas, went to refill my tumbler with ice water, then returned to room where I propped up in bed to furiously write down everything that happened. I was hoping I'd get it all out and feel better. I don't like the fuming feeling, that urge of imminent implosion. So I scrawled away by myself. I was desperately trying to get it out. I knew if I didn't the next time I opened my mouth it'd be one. hot. mess.

Then one of my roomies who didn't go to Remy with us and had no idea what all had transpired came in from her dinner. I tried not to look at her or say much. I didn't want to bring anyone else down. In hindsight maybe I should've put on my running shoes and hit deck 4 for a mile or 20. LOL!

One thing I'm not good at is hiding my true emotions. It was only a few minutes before my poor unsuspecting roomie asked what was wrong. And of course I did the worst girl-thing ever that we all hate with our whole hearts but then it happens anyway and makes whatever was so horrible that much worse....

...I burst into tears. :arghh:

...which then made me even more frustrated with myself. :in pain:

It's such a girl-thing that happens and it es me off like you wouldn't believe when I do it because I am NOT a wimpy, weepy girl. Passionate? Yes! Emotional? Yes! Wimpy? I'll kick your butt for saying it!

So I burst into tears and sobbed out the whole, terrible tale. I really was perplexed as to why I was even affected to deeply by something so trivial at best. I verbalized my confusion over it all for days still not able to wrap my brain around why it was such an over-the-top emotional reaction. Heck, just writing about it right now has me in fury of emotion and tearing up a little. So irritating!!!!! :banghead:

Here's my best explanation: I'm a natural caretaker. I've taken on the caretaker roll with everyone around me my whole life. When I was a kid I assumed responsibility and charge for all my siblings. As I moved from teenager to adult I hovered and parented my parents thru transitions in their lives. Then I got married and became the gal who was gonna take care of my bestest friend. I became a mother and, yeah, I prob'ly overdo that a bit. Just ask my inlaws how neurotic I was about the boys when they were little guys. ;) So here I was on this cruise with mostly girls who were first timers that I felt largely responsible for ensuring their experiences were flawless since I was one of the people who came up with the whole idea of doing the cruise to begin with. My roomie who accompanied me to this dinner was my cousin's wife. He had been stressing in the days leading up to the cruise over his wife having nothing but an amazing time. So when we arrived at that podium I wasn't just embarrassed for me because if I'd been alone or with my husband we would've laughed then promptly left, not returning. My cousin's wife wasn't a first time cruiser but it was her first time at a Disney cruise upcharge restaurant so I was absolutely mortified that the experience was anything short of enchanting. When I saw that lady dressed so drastically inappropriately (as stated by the podium girl earlier in the evening because IMO she looked fine as did the shoe selection I started the evening with) it was the crazy, protective caretaker that went all bat-$h!t crazy in my mind. I was eat up with wanting to exact justice for the wrong that had been leveraged against one of my girls cruise gals as well as my FAMILY. Serious as a heart attack, people. If there's one thing you don't want to do in life it's wrong someone in my family because I become this crazy monster trying to exact my wrath upon you. It's just bad.

Am I still sore about what happened? You betcha. Am I still enraged over it? Notsomuch. I would've appreciated an apology but then I wasn't exactly reaching out to the podium folks at Remy to give them a chance. Then again, perhaps they should've reached out to us since we didn't really do anything wrong.

I am very glad that Remy has a dress requirement and that it is (sometimes) enforced. I've had a special occasion meal in a WDW signature restaurant that had dress suggestions that the majority of our fellow diners didn't observe and, yeah, it did bring down the overall atmosphere a notch and put a little tarnish on the special-ness of the evening. I think it's wonderful that DCL cares about maintaining a higher level of decorum in their fine dining experiences. Heck, I think WDW could learn a thing or two from them in this area.

However, I think the key to enforcing any rule, be it with parenting or in any situation, is consistancy. It's not right to pick and choose when or where a rule will be enforced. Certainly there was more than 1 crew member manning the podium that evening. Proper training of all crew would result in the consistancy our evening lacked. If there's any one thing that is paramount in any business it's consistancy. Without it your guests and patrons won't trust that their experience will align with expectations. Without trust you have doubt. Doubt has kept me away from the majority of WDW's eateries for quite some time because we experienced lack of consistancy of product quality a few too many times. It's a prime example.

Soooooooo, I rest knowing that this evening at Remy and it's lack of consistancy in treatment of guests DID come at a cost. I promptly cancelled the Remy brunch I was booked to experience 2 days later as did my cousin's wife. Why would we return to where we felt unwelcomed??? I also cancelled the Remy dinner I had booked on the Fantasy the following week for my 20th anniversary dinner with my husband. I had intended to book Remy brunch for us on the Fantasy as soon as we boarded the ship in a few days but that went right out the window. And, I knew at some point I'd prob'ly be writing out this entire story on the interwebs somewhere and I can't help but wonder will the experience I had tip the scales for someone who was previously on the fence about Remy and cause them to decide against it. I know if I was on the fence about it, this sort of thing would definitely influence me in a negative way.

My mother always taught me that guests should always feel welcome in your home. That's paramount. Unfortunately, Remy wasn't so welcoming to me no matter how many fake smiles and sugar-coated words slipped from the mouths of the crew that night. Something about being looked up and down, inspected, and judged...I dunno....it has a way of making you feel pretty darned unworthy and unwelcome. In my family if someone makes you feel unwelcome they're seriously WRONG. That's a transgression of the worst kind.

In conclusion, in all my lack of sophistication and couth, Remy can pucker up and kiss my proverbial boo-tay. If you can't accomplish something as basic as making someone feel welcome, at home, or at ease then you pretty much suck. It's that simple. I don't feel like I need to put myself thru such treatment to eat good food. The food is good but it's not THAT good. How good can food be if you can't relax and enjoy it anyway? Not very. That's for damned sure. ;)
 

ChuckElias

Well-Known Member
Wow, sweetpee. Just . . . wow. So sorry. I hope you let someone at DCL know of this story. Even if you just forward your post to Guest Services.

Your treatment at the podium was poor, but might charitably be viewed as simple insensitivity. But putting you through that embarrassment and THEN allowing much poorer dress into the restaurant is unacceptable.

You HAVE to make DCL aware of the incident.
 

sweetpee_1993

Well-Known Member
Wow, sweetpee. Just . . . wow. So sorry. I hope you let someone at DCL know of this story. Even if you just forward your post to Guest Services.

Your treatment at the podium was poor, but might charitably be viewed as simple insensitivity. But putting you through that embarrassment and THEN allowing much poorer dress into the restaurant is unacceptable.

You HAVE to make DCL aware of the incident.

Thanks, Chuck. I didn't say anything because, seriously, they wouldn't have taken a flippin' out idiot seriously and I knew that. I knew I couldn't open my mouth and have it go well. It was still waaaaaay too fresh when I was on that ship. I think I heard mention that another of my dining companions did say something but I don't really know what she said or what the response was so I didn't feel like I could insert that bit into the story. It doesn't change what happened either way. I do intend to address it. I've got household/homeschool stuff to get caught up on at the moment but I fully intend to address what happened now that I seem to have gathered my thoughts more and distanced myself enough to conduct myself more like a lady.
 

Disneyfalcon

Well-Known Member
Wow, sweetpee. Just . . . wow. So sorry. I hope you let someone at DCL know of this story. Even if you just forward your post to Guest Services.

Your treatment at the podium was poor, but might charitably be viewed as simple insensitivity. But putting you through that embarrassment and THEN allowing much poorer dress into the restaurant is unacceptable.

You HAVE to make DCL aware of the incident.
Thanks, Chuck. I didn't say anything because, seriously, they wouldn't have taken a flippin' out idiot seriously and I knew that. I knew I couldn't open my mouth and have it go well. It was still waaaaaay too fresh when I was on that ship. I think I heard mention that another of my dining companions did say something but I don't really know what she said or what the response was so I didn't feel like I could insert that bit into the story. It doesn't change what happened either way. I do intend to address it. I've got household/homeschool stuff to get caught up on at the moment but I fully intend to address what happened now that I seem to have gathered my thoughts more and distanced myself enough to conduct myself more like a lady.

Thanks for sharing, Kelly. I didn't want to tell your story for you.

I actually did go talk to the staff after Kelly left. I told them that being told to change shoes is embarrassing, but they were okay and ultimately we appreciated someone that actually enforces the dress code (hello California Grill). But when we saw the girl in full out flip flops we realized it wasn't being enforced for everyone and that wasn't okay.

She apologized profusely and said the other family was let in by someone else (a manager actually) who didn't notice the other person's shoes. They were probably camouflaged by her knit floral borderline appropriate pants. :rolleyes: She couldn't get to them in time to stop them apparently.

I'm not going to sugar coat it, they messed up (and the girl I talked to knew it). There's no way that other guest should have made it in.
 

sweetpee_1993

Well-Known Member
Thanks for sharing, Kelly. I didn't want to tell your story for you.

I actually did go talk to the staff after Kelly left. I told them that being told to change shoes is embarrassing, but they were okay and ultimately we appreciated someone that actually enforces the dress code (hello California Grill). But when we saw the girl in full out flip flops we realized it wasn't being enforced for everyone and that wasn't okay.

She apologized profusely and said the other family was let in by someone else (a manager actually) who didn't notice the other person's shoes. They were probably camouflaged by her knit floral borderline appropriate pants. :rolleyes: She couldn't get to them in time to stop them apparently.

I'm not going to sugar coat it, they messed up (and the girl I talked to knew it). There's no way that other guest should have made it in.

Thanks, Tammy. I knew you had said something but wasn't sure what you'd said so I couldn't comment on that.

I swear, in all things in life I make it a point to take something constructive to give things purpose. I never want to stop learning. If I learned anything on this cruise it's how much of a true lady in every sense of the word that @Disneyfalcon is and how much I aspire to be that sort of person. Being positive even when things are not is completely unnatural but not impossible as Tammy demonstrated. Even when you don't like something it's possible to find something you do and that can be your focus. ((Sanaa...I knew the dinner was a stretch but then I think dessert totally eclipsed that which made it great. ;) )) Change. Diversity. Even craptasticness. It's all good. You just have to take it all in stride and find ways to create positive experiences for yourself rather than walk around letting things throw you. Tammy is the coolest of all cucumbers and a constant positive. I need to work on that. I want to be more like that.
 

Disneyfalcon

Well-Known Member
Thanks, Tammy. I knew you had said something but wasn't sure what you'd said so I couldn't comment on that.

I swear, in all things in life I make it a point to take something constructive to give things purpose. I never want to stop learning. If I learned anything on this cruise it's how much of a true lady in every sense of the word that @Disneyfalcon is and how much I aspire to be that sort of person. Being positive even when things are not is completely unnatural but not impossible as Tammy demonstrated. Even when you don't like something it's possible to find something you do and that can be your focus. ((Sanaa...I knew the dinner was a stretch but then I think dessert totally eclipsed that which made it great. ;) )) Change. Diversity. Even craptasticness. It's all good. You just have to take it all in stride and find ways to create positive experiences for yourself rather than walk around letting things throw you. Tammy is the coolest of all cucumbers and a constant positive. I need to work on that. I want to be more like that.

Wow. That is so incredibly sweet of you! Seriously! You just blew me away. That really means a lot. I may be a little teary right now...

By the way, I thought the chicken was great at Sanaa! It was my fault for not being prepared for how spicy the "spicy" chicken really was, lol. And you're right the dessert was amazing. :)
 

Kerby626

Active Member
@sweetpee_1993 you said it better than I could have. It truly did change my mind on how up charge restaurants on the ships are. Palo was amazing from the very beginning and something I would def do again. Remy is a different story and maybe with just two people it would not take near as long to complete. But I felt outbid my element in there. Maybe brunch is totally different and something I might try.

Non the less thank you for talking me into trying it with the girls cruise. I am glad it was an experience for all of us

@Disneyfalcon was such a bright spot through it all. I could tell she was there to support and make sure out concerns were noted. She is an excellent friend that took the time to make sure something was said on our behalf
 

Disneyfalcon

Well-Known Member
@sweetpee_1993 you said it better than I could have. It truly did change my mind on how up charge restaurants on the ships are. Palo was amazing from the very beginning and something I would def do again. Remy is a different story and maybe with just two people it would not take near as long to complete. But I felt outbid my element in there. Maybe brunch is totally different and something I might try.

Non the less thank you for talking me into trying it with the girls cruise. I am glad it was an experience for all of us

@Disneyfalcon was such a bright spot through it all. I could tell she was there to support and make sure out concerns were noted. She is an excellent friend that took the time to make sure something was said on our behalf

Thank you, Christina! I'm so glad you were there. :)
 

iloverags2

Active Member
In conclusion, in all my lack of sophistication and couth, Remy can pucker up and kiss my proverbial boo-tay. If you can't accomplish something as basic as making someone feel welcome, at home, or at ease then you pretty much suck. It's that simple. I don't feel like I need to put myself thru such treatment to eat good food. The food is good but it's not THAT good. How good can food be if you can't relax and enjoy it anyway? Not very. That's for damned sure. ;)

Wow, just wow is about all I can say after that. I love your final thought on all of this, and agree with you wholeheartedly. This pretty much sealed the deal for me (really, us) on Remy. I was on the fence about it after the V&A fiasco, thinking maybe we should give it a try...but no way now.

And I agree with others...this is something you definitely need to make DCL aware of. Quite honestly, why the sandals were not ok in the first place remains a mystery to me (have they not seen some of the incredibly HOT footwear out these days, that tends to be of the strappy sandal variety???), but the public embarrassment about it all was not ok regardless of their footwear policy. That alone needs to be addressed, even before Miss Floral Pants' approval to enter even comes into play.

I say you send DCL exactly what you posted here. Honestly. They need to know everything.
 

Camelot

Active Member
@sweetpee_1993: I admire that you kept your cool for not just one, but two faux-pas' at Remy's. And they don't even realize how much business they have lost, just from you and others on this forum, who know of your horrible experience there. Word of mouth is a powerful thing.
 

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