I'm going to address a variety of the topics brought up here by both the original poster and some other Disney zealots...
Regarding employee behavior - having had annual passes to both Disney World and Universal Orlando for a couple of years now, I can say that Universal's employees are generally friendlier and more attentive than Disney's. You'll see someone with a cell phone every once in a while, sure, but I sure do see them a lot more often over at the Mouse's House. In addition, I can name maybe one or two times where I've had a memorably negative experience with a Universal cast member - at Disney? At least a dozen, if not more. That's just my experience. That said, they're people, and people will be people and do thinks they're not supposed to be, regardless of who they're working for.
The characters/movies you mentioned - Twister, Hulk, and Terminator - are all relevant to some extent.
The Hulk is a hugely popular comic book character that has two successful movies in the past year as well as a very well regarded TV series in decade's past. It holds a large amount of nostalgia for comic book fans... hardly "dated".
Terminator? Are you serious? It's had 3 incredibly successful movies and a fourth on the way as well as a well done TV series on Fox. In addition, the attraction, while based on the second movie, is still extremely entertaining and excellent. Is that dated, or did I miss something?
Twister, as a film, is not quite as relevant as some of the other films represented in the park. However, it really isn't necessary for one to be familiar with the film's plot to enjoy the attraction - besides, the plot is basically outlined in the two preshows anyway. It's a disaster attraction for god's sakes.
All of the other films/properties (Mummy, Blues Brothers, Seuss, Marvel, Jurassic Park, Men in Black, Simpsons, E.T., Barney, soon Harry Potter, etc.) are all to some extent either timeless or a major part of pop culture. I think you're just looking for reasons to complain there.
As for the parade floats - you think they look cheap? They look pretty damn similar to the floats seen at the real deal (Mardi Gras). I mean, what has Disney put out there lately? Another recycled parade with the snowglobe tops taken off? To me the floats are creative and look quite nice. The alcohol was especially present during your visit due to Mardi Gras - I mean come on, it's MARDI GRAS. There's going to be some alcohol. It's a part of life, really.
Addressing Dragon Rider on the Marvel "parade" - it is not advertised as a full parade or anything of the sort. It's a meet and greet in style. Toon Lagoon occasionally does one too with a toon trolley, as do the Simpsons in their trailer over at the Studios. If you ask me, for a meet and greet it's pretty fun and creative.
The Simpsons Ride, to me, is an awesome attraction worthy of replacing Back to the Future. Now, I'm not saying it's better than good ol` BTTF, but it IS no doubt a great motion simulator with a hilarious preshow and actual ride experience. I apologize your parents didn't enjoy it, but I assure you many others did - it won the best new attraction award last year. I notice you didn't comment on many of the other excellent rides Universal has - Men in Black, Spiderman, Jurassic Park, Cat in the Hat, Disaster, and Mummy, among many others...
Dudley Do-Right's a Splash Mountain clone? I didn't realize a flume ride with show scenes was a clone of Splash Mountain. As a thrill ride it destroys Splash Mountain, and the exterior of the structure is more impressive than Splash in my opinion. I think some of the interior scenes leave a bit to be desired, but the overall ride experience is very positive - even now I still chuckle at the clever jokes and puns as well as the subtle (and not so subtle) Disney pokes. And, in addition, the Popeye Raft Ride whoops Kali into the ground - it tells a classic and beloved story through effective show scenes with a lengthy and very wild ride.
Jaws and Jungle Cruise are a bit different in tone, but I find Jaws to be superior than Jungle Cruise due to both its skippers (which almost always give either a believable performance or a more light-hearted, funny one) and its sheer scope, as well as maintenance.
Speaking of maintenance, in most regards Universal is eons above Disney when it comes to maintenance. I have NEVER seen an element not function correctly on many of its rides, and when I do see something significantly wrong, I tell a team member when exiting - on Mummy for example, the first Imhotep was making some very odd movement and didn't look like it was working correctly. I informed the team member, and within a few minutes the ride went 101... by the end of the day the ride had reopened with Imhotep in a functional A-mode.
Universal's animatronics are usually of pretty good or excellent quality and as mentioned above are well maintained. Many, such as the T-80's (or whatever they're called), the T-Rex, the sharks over at Jaws, several of the more advanced aliens in Men in Black, and the Imhoteps in Mummy still make me go "Wow". Another nice thing to note is that Universal still constructs heavy-AA attractions... a great example is the Men in Black ride, built in the last decade. Would such a ride be built at Disney around the same time? I sadly doubt it. And it looks like another AA-heavy ride is coming with the new Harry Potter ride (some concept art shows off some giant spider and basilisk AA diagrams). Should be incredible.
I'm not saying Disney is crap, though its parks really have declined over the past few years... and I'm showing Disney that I don't like it by having not renewed my set of 4 Annual Passes and instead renewing my Universal passes. I think people need to stop going into Universal expecting the worst, cuz that's what you'll get. It's called a self-fulfilling prophecy folks. Go in with an open mind, and you'll find an amazing world-class resort that surpasses Disney in many regards. The two resorts CAN in fact coexist, as can people who love and enjoy both.