Here's my Jungle Cruise defense.:lol:
Story
Whether people know it or not, the Jungle Cruise has a great story behind it. The Jungle Cruise Navigation Company is actually part of a larger transportation company that decided to start tours through the jungle after they opened up a railroad line in the area.* Unfortunately, the railroad workers they got to become boat skippers have no idea what they are doing in the jungle, nor do they no much about the plants and animals that populate it.
*The reason the railroad story is part of the ride, is the I've been told, originally, the second floor was to be a stop on the Walt Disney World Railroad. After plans were scrapped for that, they kept the story, because you can still hear the train's whistle as you cruise the rivers of adventure. Also, more recently, it is rumored that the owner of the company is none other than Merriweather Pleasure.
Queue
While it isn't the best queue in the world, JC's has some very nice details. You can see relics and souvenirs collected by the skippers and their crews on their expeditions, some of which are marked for transport to Mr. Pleasure's famous Adventurers Club. You also pass the JC Navigation Company's offices, along with some pretty nice gags.
We also have Mr. Albert Awol, "the voice of the jungle", broadcasting the hits that are rocking the 1930s, and some very interesting jokes.
Also, we get to make announcements over the queue's PA system, where some of our funnier skippers incite laughs from those in line.
Ride
There isn't a ride anywhere like the Jungle Cruise. The level of cast member to guest interaction is un paralleled. There's nothing like having a boat full of people laughing, and being able to interact with them, and have the guests interact back.
Our ride vehicles are incredibly themed, with our personal effects hanging on the side/back, and really look like a jungle vessel.
Our show scenes could use a little work right now, but they still deliver the great sight gags, and smiles for adults and children a like. There's nothing like seeing a kid's face light up when they see an African elephant poking out of the jungle.
Theming
You are literally in the jungle. Plain and simple. Many of the plants that surround you are authentic, and do a perfect job of transporting you into the world of adventure. And the radio broadcast in the queue does a fantastic job of placing you in the 1930s.
Humor
Yes, there are some duds when it comes to the skips, but most of us are very funny, and very committed to our jobs. Give a skipper a happy, attentive audience and he or she will give them the ride of their life.
And there you go.
I like your explanation!