The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

[MySmallWorldof4]

Thank you! I'm sorry to hear about your SIL. It's so rare it seems for divorce to go smoothly nowadays. I've been reading that part of the issue is the growing number of people with narcissistic and/or borderline personality tendencies. People who feel entitled to what they don't deserve and when hurt will lash out at them regardless of anyone else. And it's not like you can reason with these people. They believe what they want to believe and call everyone else a liar.

Ha! Key word- narcissist. He is such a huge one. They actually had therapy and the therapist said he was one. He takes responsibility for nothing. He blames everything on her. He bad talks about her to the kids. He is actually still living in the house!!! He thinks it is fine to do that and even suggested they should keep it that way even after the divorce is finalized!!! The whole situation is just a mess.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

This is going to be long.. but thought I would post this article. It’s from last Fall.. I was just lead to it from another World Cup article.. but it’s an interesting read. I can say first hand that I understand what they’re saying (especially the bold).
I hope the best for youth soccer.. and I do think it’s incredibly disappointing that the USA will not be at the World Cup this year.
I’d actually blame the loss on a lot more than Youth Development, although it’s nice to see that we recognize there’s a problem.

In 2007, the U.S. instituted the Development Academy system, which essentially systematized the frequency of training and gameplay among 64 clubs across the country and has since expanded to over 150 clubs. MLS clubs all have academy teams, and if a player makes the team, all of his expenses are typically paid for. But for most of the non-MLS-affiliated clubs, players have to, as the jibe goes, “pay to play.” That tuition costs around $2,500 a year.

“Parents in the U.S. are routinely spending up to 50 to 100 times what parents in Europe spend on signing their kids up for competitive soccer,” Anderson said.

So if a player doesn’t live near an MLS academy, he only has access to the best training the country can offer if he can afford it. Elsewhere in the world, talent development is, as the Wall Street Journal put it, looked at as a “civic responsibility and an investment, because one of them just might turn out to be the next Lionel Messi.”
“Decisions in this country are made about the dollar instead of about the game,” Twellman said. “And I think when that changes, then you'll see incremental progress. But until that changes—and if every decision in our country is made about the dollar and not the game—then you’re in trouble.”

Then there’s the size issue: America is huge. European countries have training and coaching centers across the entire nation to make sure no talent falls through the cracks, but doing the same in the U.S. is a gargantuan task. We can’t systematize development in the same way a tiny country like Iceland has. (So, please stop using them as a point of comparison to America’s failings.)

“The U.S. Soccer Development Academy system has been an important step forward, but there are still large swathes of the country where the player pathway up the pyramid is virtually nonexistent unless parents want to go to extraordinary lengths and expenses,” Anderson said. “So you could and probably should easily double the number of USDA teams and introduce additional feeders.”

There’s no chicken or egg here: You can’t develop players without the proper coaching.
“Coaching development is the key to U.S. soccer’s long-term success,” Anderson said. “We are still playing catch-up when it comes to the number of adults interested in coaching who also played the game at a reasonable level.”
While the U.S. Federation offers varying levels of coaching degrees, they’re expensive, and the results have been scattershot at best. The Development Academy doesn’t start until under-12, so before then, many kids have to hope they get proper guidance from the right well-meaning volunteer parent. After that, the focus of coaches is too often on winning games against other American teams plagued by the same issues, rather than expanding the tactical and technical development of their players—results be damned.
“I see it at the national team when you are having conversations with a lot of these players,” Twellman said. “When these new players come in, the ones that are developed within the American system in some form or another, the tactical understanding of the game in multiple positions is lacking compared to the rest of the world.”

As always seems to be the case with American soccer, it’s capitalism’s fault.
“U.S. coaches continue to be heavy on athleticism and effort and weaker on tactical and technical sophistication,” Anderson said. “Size and speed are powerful when you’re interested in winning games at the youth level. When you have for-profit clubs where winning trophies is important for the business model to attract paying customers, technical and tactical ability are less important.”

It’s not easy to unwind all of the knotty for-profit structures that prop up the game in America. Hiring the right people is only the beginning, but there’s way more work to be done after that. Could missing the World Cup lead to some wide-scale introspection?
“I believe that the moment is there,” Twellman said. “I'm not completely convinced that the United States will maximize the moment. In my gut, I hope and think we do, but in my brain, part of me thinks that people are still too reluctant to admit and commit to change.”

An interesting read and relevant to what T has gone through.

 

[21stamps]

An interesting read and relevant to what T has gone through.

I thought so to. If T would have not played at all..I would have lost hope in the system. I didn’t realize that they were debating between keeping him Premier or moving down.. which still bothers me, but I’m trying to be optimistic.

Speaking of.. look what I received in my inbox this afternoon.. so now I have to predict if T will grow enough to make a new uniform investment worth it. Especially because... they’re changing the kits after next season. Why wouldn’t they? Gotta keep up with the professionals.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

I thought so to. If T would have not played at all..I would have lost hope in the system. I didn’t realize that they were debating between keeping him Premier or moving down.. which still bothers me, but I’m trying to be optimistic.

Speaking of.. look what I received in my inbox this afternoon.. so now I have to predict if T will grow enough to make a new uniform investment worth it. Especially because... they’re changing the kits after next season. Why wouldn’t they? Gotta keep up with the professionals.

View attachment 289764

Pray he doesn’t grow and stick with the ones he has? Unlikely, huh?

 

[StarWarsGirl]

I can definitely understand a hectic schedule.. I’ll bet you’ll be thrilled when you have it home tomorrow.

Ugh. My dad just told me he's trying to get more than they offered for the trade in on my car. Now he's like, "Well, maybe not tomorrow..." I want to tell him yes, tomorrow, if they tell you no, we're still doing it. But UGH! I've had it. I just want my car.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Ugh. My dad just told me he's trying to get more than they offered for the trade in on my car. Now he's like, "Well, maybe not tomorrow..." I want to tell him yes, tomorrow, if they tell you no, we're still doing it. But UGH! I've had it. I just want my car.

Frustrating. You can look up Kelley Blue Book values online and plug in your cars info in it. It will give you a good idea how much it is worth.

 

[StarWarsGirl]

Frustrating. You can look up Kelley Blue Book values online and plug in your cars info in it. It will give you a good idea how much it is worth.

That's what he did. They undervalued it. He's going to call tomorrow. I told him I'm good cop; he's bad cop. I just don't. Want. Any. More. Delays. My goodness, I've been at this since January. I've had it.

 

[21stamps]

Pray he doesn’t grow and stick with the ones he has? Unlikely, huh?

I think I’ll order 2 pair of shorts..one pair of socks..one practice shirt.. and new warmups.
I bought both the home and away jerseys in size 10.. one practice shirt in a 10, and one practice shirt in an 8..his shorts are 8s. Thr size 8s will most likely be too small before August..he’s just so skinny though!

The Game jerseys are custom from Nike (which is why I bought them a little big), but the practice jerseys and warm up suits are basically iron on decals and/or patches on top of Nike club gear. I don’t see why those would need to be decided on right now...I wish we had another month for that. I’m not buying 3 more pair of socks before the uniform change, for sure.

 

[donaldtoo]

I loved the spitting. We were at DS on Thursday and I don’t remember seeing him. Hope he spits again soon.

Yes, it was always awesome when he would spitch...

 

[21stamps]

That's what he did. They undervalued it. He's going to call tomorrow. I told him I'm good cop; he's bad cop. I just don't. Want. Any. More. Delays. My goodness, I've been at this since January. I've had it.

How much of a difference are you at? Have you thought about just putting your car on Autotrader or Craigslist? You’ll get more money selling it as retail instead of trade.

It’s tough with older trades because the dealer most likely can’t resell them as a retail vehicle, which means they aren’t inline with what KBB says. Kelley Blue Book is a good resource for private sales if you do go that route.

 

[donaldtoo]

View attachment 286644

So far behind, I have no clue, but, it looks kinda' Volvo-ish...

 

[StarWarsGirl]

How much of a difference are you at? Have you thought about just putting your car on Autotrader or Craigslist? You’ll get more money selling it as retail instead of trade.

It’s tough with older trades because the dealer most likely can’t resell them as a retail vehicle, which means they aren’t inline with what KBB says. Kelley Blue Book is a good resource for private sales if you do go that route.

They valued it at $500. My old Aurora, which we traded in for my dad's Lacrosse, we got $550 for, and it was older and in worse shape. Like, limping to the dealer bad. He's going to go higher on them and ask for $1000

 

[21stamps]

They valued it at $500. My old Aurora, which we traded in for my dad's Lacrosse, we got $550 for, and it was older and in worse shape. Like, limping to the dealer bad. He's going to go higher on them and ask for $1000

A lot of dealers will give $500 if the car can make it there without being towed...at that point they’re all basically wholesale.

Your current vehicle is an SUV right? You may be able to get $1000 for it. I hope you do!

 

[StarWarsGirl]

A lot of dealers will give $500 if the car can make it there without being towed...at that point they’re all basically wholesale.

Your current vehicle is an SUV right? You may be able to get $1000 for it. I hope you do!

Yeah, and it's not limping along; it just needs a bunch of repairs, which I'm not doing. If it weren't for the AC and the 12v ports (cigarette lighters) going up, it would still definitely be okay.

Low KBB value was $750; I think if he can get them to agree to that, he'll take it. But my uncle said he'd give us $500 for it and he and my grandfather would fix it, so we'd give it to them before we'd give it to the dealer for $500.

 

[21stamps]

Yeah, and it's not limping along; it just needs a bunch of repairs, which I'm not doing. If it weren't for the AC and the 12v ports (cigarette lighters) going up, it would still definitely be okay.

Low KBB value was $750; I think if he can get them to agree to that, he'll take it. But my uncle said he'd give us $500 for it and he and my grandfather would fix it, so we'd give it to them before we'd give it to the dealer for $500.

The dealer won’t fix it.. it will cost them too much to retail it after, they won’t get their money back. I think you have a high probability of at least $750 from the sounds of it. If you live in a county and state with high sales tax, and a tax credit for new cars, then it may benefit you to trade.. but the taxes on that amount are still relatively small so you may want to sell it to your uncle.

I’m not a fan of KBB because it’s not accurate enough, it doesn’t ask enough questions, and it doesn’t see or drive the vehicle..and they won’t write a check for a car. Run your vin number and fill out questions on NADA.. that’s most likely what the dealer is going off of, definitely more than KBB. It will give you a more accurate idea, or it may even be the same which will give you more leverage.

 

[donaldtoo]

How much of a difference are you at? Have you thought about just putting your car on Autotrader or Craigslist? You’ll get more money selling it as retail instead of trade.

It’s tough with older trades because the dealer most likely can’t resell them as a retail vehicle, which means they aren’t inline with what KBB says. Kelley Blue Book is a good resource for private sales if you do go that route.

Yep, you'll never get (most of the time, not even remotely close) as much for trading the used vehicle in, as you'll get if you take the time/hassle to sell it yourself.
And, many dealers don't want the used ones on their lots, so they sell them to wholesalers, that sell them to other dealers. Everyone has to make some money in that food chain, thus the low trade in values/money.

 

[donaldtoo]

Alrighty gang, I'm a goner for now...!
Y'all all be cool, and sweet dreams to all...!!!
See y'allllllllllllllll

 

[21stamps]

Yep, you'll never get (most of the time, not even remotely close) as much for trading the used vehicle in, as you'll get if you take the time/hassle to sell it yourself.
And, many dealers don't want the used ones on their lots, so they sell them to wholesalers, that sell them to other dealers. Everyone has to make some money in that food chain, thus the low trade in values/money.

Yep.

 

[StarWarsGirl]

The dealer won’t fix it.. it will cost them too much to retail it after, they won’t get their money back. I think you have a high probability of at least $750 from the sounds of it. If you live in a county and state with high sales tax, and a tax credit for new cars, then it may benefit you to trade.. but the taxes on that amount are still relatively small so you may want to sell it to your uncle.

I’m not a fan of KBB because it’s not accurate enough, it doesn’t ask enough questions, and it doesn’t see or drive the vehicle..and they won’t write a check for a car. Run your vin number and fill out questions on NADA.. that’s most likely what the dealer is going off of, definitely more than KBB. It will give you a more accurate idea, or it may even be the same which will give you more leverage.

Thanks...that was way higher. $1650 at the lowest point.

 

[MinnieM123]

That's what he did. They undervalued it. He's going to call tomorrow. I told him I'm good cop; he's bad cop. I just don't. Want. Any. More. Delays. My goodness, I've been at this since January. I've had it.

Hang in there--it will happen . . . eventually . . . (Have to tell you, though, that I did smile when I read the above. All I could think of was the standard lawyer's mantra, "We could argue that . . . " In other words, this might take a bit longer . . . )