The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

[21stamps]

Isn't that exactly what married couples do every single day? Sometimes things are less of an issue when the responsibility is shared. I'm divorce (actually widowed) now, but, I don't think I ever could have raised my children alone. Among a lot of things that I am not grateful for, I am thankful that she waited until they were grown up and married before she decided she no longer wanted to be a couple.

Yes in a way, but mostly No.

Dating is entirely different than marriage, especially with a child. In a marriage, your spouse is at home.. you still take time for yourselves, but a lot revolves around your child or children, and once those children go to bed, then you and spouse are there, together. And most importantly, you’re married because you were a couple prior to your children.. you’ve had the time to bond.

When dating w/ a child - your sig other does not live in the home, your activities do not revolve around each one of your separate children in the beginning (for quite some time). You need to get to know each other as individuals. I don’t think a child should be involved in that process. The sig other is not there when the kids go to sleep, and you can’t constantly leave your child to make time for them. So unless all “dates” are after 9pm when you hire a sitter to be there while child is sleeping, then it’s hard to balance with a career (especially one with long hours) and children, especially those involved in many extracurricular activities.

The guy I was dating had kids who were in high school, and they mostly lived with his ex wife (shared custody though), so his schedule was a little more accommodating for “dating”. Plus, he had been divorced for 10 years, extremely amicable relationship with ex wife who is remarried, and kids probably didn’t think dating was shocking. My son was 4 then 5 at the time, it’s always been just me and him, and we live alone. My schedule/rules for who can become involved in kiddo’s life, was/is still not as accommodating.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

So...is Cortisone kind of a synthetic form of that? Would that be the injection I got?

I believe so.

 

[Goofyernmost]

Yes in a way, but mostly No.

Dating is entirely different than marriage, especially with a child. In a marriage, your spouse is at home.. you still take time for yourselves, but a lot revolves around your child or children, and once those children go to bed, then you and spouse are there, together. And most importantly, you’re married because you were a couple prior to your children.. you’ve had the time to bond.

When dating w/ a child - your sig other does not live in the home, your activities do not revolve around your children in the beginning (for quite some time). You need to get to know each other as individuals. I don’t think a child should be involved in that process. The sig other is not there when the kids go to sleep, and you can’t constantly leave your child to make time for them. So unless all “dates” are after 9pm when you hire a sitter to be there while child is sleeping, then it’s hard to balance with a career (especially one with long hours) and children, especially those involved in many extracurricular activities.

True, but, it is hard to find that special person that fits in with our needs without the dating part. Catch 22 anyone! Of course, the always better option is to win the lottery. I think that just means that life is far from perfect and we just play the cards that life deals us. So there is no wrong answer to that scenario, just our own personal preferences.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Me too. If I got 8 it would be awesome. I can't turn over in bed right now. If I want to sleep on my other side I literally have to sit up and put my pillow on the other end then lay down again.

Yup, and right now I can't drive.

Multiple sympathy likes.

 

[donaldtoo]

Absconded Chick-fil-A luncheon munchies...!!!!!!!

 

[StarWarsGirl]

Me too. If I got 8 it would be awesome. I can't turn over in bed right now. If I want to sleep on my other side I literally have to sit up and put my pillow on the other end then lay down again.

I laid down on the couch last night. A fat kitten leaped onto my chest and started purring before going to sleep. Then, eventually, the twelve pounds of fluff left, but only when I was half asleep. I went to bed at 9:30 and according to my FitBit got 8.5 hours of sleep.

Then I woke up with a migraine and realized why I was so exhausted. I considered calling in sick to work, but then when I saw the amount of work that was waiting for me, I was glad I decided to just stick it out.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Man, you are really stressing about these tests. Maybe he wasn't paying attention because he was bored with what they were learning and maybe the talking was he is a kid...being a kid.

My guess he was bored as well and not paying attention. @21stamps, I think T is a bright kid and kids have their moments of misbehavior or not paying attention. I wouldn't threaten with money. I would threaten with sports. Tell him if he doesn't stop chatting in class when he is not supposed to that you will cut our soccer and baseball. Money is difficult because you will get him stuff anyway like clothing and food. If he tells you school is his business, then tell him that in the business world people take their jobs seriously and pay attention to what they are supposed to do. Just a thought or two.

 

[Cesar R M]

View attachment 282818

But what if.. YOU'RE THE MOM?

Tagging @The Mom . Because she knows

 

[Cesar R M]

View attachment 282828

4 days until Mother's Day.

Tomorrow is mother's day for us.

 

[Cesar R M]

View attachment 282844

Internally or externally? "both".

 

[21stamps]

True, but, it is hard to find that special person that fits in with our needs without the dating part. Catch 22 anyone! Of course, the always better option is to win the lottery. I think that just means that life is far from perfect and we just play the cards that life deals us. So there is no wrong answer to that scenario, just our own personal preferences.

I agree, and I like to think that I’m now self aware enough to not put anyone else thru all of the last-minute-cancellations that I put that man through. I wasn’t fair in the relationship, I was selfish, and I know that it won’t change. When T is in high school, or maybe once he’s driving, at that point I’ll have time to date, if I feel like I want to. Honestly though, I’ve been married, I don’t feel a rush to do it again... and mostly, I don’t want my child to play a factor in the decision of feeling like I need help, or because things would be easier with a spouse. I’m good as we are right now.

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Points if you name the movie this is from ..
View attachment 282941

Casablanca?

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

Went we first got married my wife had a cat named Daisy. I had the, sorry I couldn't keep a straight face, duty of telling my Registered Nurse wife that Daisy was actually a Charlie. He responded better to Charlie anyway.

When we got one of our cats almost 3 years ago, we were told it was a boy. When we took it to the vet they said, "nope, it's a girl".

 

[Cesar R M]

I laid down on the couch last night. A fat kitten leaped onto my chest and started purring before going to sleep. Then, eventually, the twelve pounds of fluff left, but only when I was half asleep. I went to bed at 9:30 and according to my FitBit got 8.5 hours of sleep.

Then I woke up with a migraine and realized why I was so exhausted. I considered calling in sick to work, but then when I saw the amount of work that was waiting for me, I was glad I decided to just stick it out.

so.. Mount StartWars girl was again conquered by Belle?
8.5 hour seems nice to get.

 

[DryerLintFan]

You just described the exact reason as to why I don’t date.
No, but seriously, your saying is true. I’ve dated one guy in the past 7 years, he is a great guy, but one day I just realized that I didn’t have the energy to have a career, be a mother, and have to care about someone else as well...or at the very least add one more ball to the juggling act. So I told him the cliche “it’s me, not you.” and I wasn’t being disengenuous with that line, it was 100% true, and he knew it.

I’m far from the perfect parent, and I miss a lot of my son’s life, and I drop a lot of balls, but I can’t drop a ball with the ‘big stuff’ where he is concerned. If our schedule is having any impact on school at all, then something needs to change. I don’t think it is, but I don’t know. Or maybe even if it has nothing to do with his schedule, but needing attention in one area or another. His teachers see him more than I do during the week, so I want to know if they’ve noticed a difference throughout the year, or just to give me any feedback in general. I’ve never had a requested conference, so didn’t even meet with them after the last report card. I’ve assumed based on grades and emails that everything is fine.

I feel the same way about how vital it is to communicate with teachers because they spend more hours with the kid than I do. By the by, how did they like their Teacher Appreciation presents?

I agree, and I like to think that I’m now self aware enough to not put anyone else thru all of the last-minute-cancellations that I put that man through. I wasn’t fair in the relationship, I was selfish, and I know that it won’t change. When T is in high school, or maybe once he’s driving, at that point I’ll have time to date, if I feel like I want to. Honestly though, I’ve been married, I don’t feel a rush to do it again... and mostly, I don’t want my child to play a factor in the decision of feeling like I need help, or because things would be easier with a spouse. I’m good as we are right now.

Things are not always easier with a spouse.

 

[Figgy1]

I laid down on the couch last night. A fat kitten leaped onto my chest and started purring before going to sleep. Then, eventually, the twelve pounds of fluff left, but only when I was half asleep. I went to bed at 9:30 and according to my FitBit got 8.5 hours of sleep.

Then I woke up with a migraine and realized why I was so exhausted. I considered calling in sick to work, but then when I saw the amount of work that was waiting for me, I was glad I decided to just stick it out.

Are you sure Jasmine isn't part jaguar?

 

[Figgy1]

The big bad leaf got me. I was pulling a few leaves and weeds out of my garden and OUCH hip OUCH. Heating pad and a Potter movie or 3 and I should be fine

 

[Goofyernmost]

Absconded Chick-fil-A luncheon munchies...!!!!!!! View attachment 282946

I have to ask... what is the purpose of the Gluten Free chips when everything else in the box is almost pure gluten.

 

[donaldtoo]

Points if you name the movie this is from ..
View attachment 282941

It's a C-47 with the D-day black and white stripe markings on the wings, but, I'm not sure what movie it's from.
But, I'll hazard a guess (even though I don't remember any C-47's in this movie off the top of my head) and say "Saving Private Ryan"...?

Also, possibly "The Longest Day" or "Where Eagles Dare"...?

I know, 3 guesses, but, you didn't put a limit on guesses...!

 

[MySmallWorldof4]

The big bad leaf got me. I was pulling a few leaves and weeds out of my garden and OUCH hip OUCH. Heating pad and a Potter movie or 3 and I should be fine

Sympathy like, but your remedy sounds perfect to me.