DD had a few groaners to add here:
A termite walks into the bar and asks "Is the bar tender here?"
I asked a Frenchman if he played video games. He said Wii.
What do you call a camel with no humps?
What did one plate say to the other?
What do sea monsters eat?
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
Playing Ketchup. Yesterday was a big huge craft fair and I took DD to it. We had a great time and I needed it. Friday was a sucky day. I pulled a stupid...DS's new school is awesome, but they have a different schedule that I'm not used to yet. Wednesdays and Fridays are half days, and for some reason I had 12 in my head instead of 12:30. So I left my house at 11:20 so I would get there about 10 minutes to 12. I get halfway there and I realize my mistake and normally I bring a book with me so I have something to do while I wait, but since I thought I was only going to be there 10 minutes early, I didn't bother. So I'm right by the city center, berating myself for the mistake and thinking where I should go for that half hour, and a woman on a bike turned right in front of a car...I didn't see her at all until she flew over the hood of the car. I actually thought it was a kid because I thought what I saw flying over the car was a backpack...but it was the woman. I called an ambulance and I wasn't the only one, or even the first, but someone was doing CPR and someone else jumped into the street to direct traffic...there must have been about 20 other people who saw it. And then the ambulance came...well, actually 3 or 4 showed up, and they called for an airlift. They ended up canceling the airlift...it was too late. My husband had to come home from work to pick DS up from school. I was SOOOOO glad it wasn't on the way BACK, that HE didn't witness that. When I got home, I was still so shaky I ended up pouring myself a large shot. I hardly ever drink, but that called for some booze. The policeman I gave my statement to was really nice, though. He asked me how I was handling it and told me to ask my doctor for help if I needed someone to talk to. Really nice guy. So that was my Friday. Well, and I worked, but at least that was a good distraction.