I’m removed from it now. But as most of you know my son was a Parks and Rec major. Where he worked for worked for over a decade, the soccer and football were the most troublesome parents each had a few that ruined it for most families. Most the trouble families had nice kids and talents. The trouble parents lacked awareness to how much second guessing they did each year, complaints about everything from what the philosophy of the program should be, who should play more, practice and game schedules, late registration wants, if they could play up or down also age vs grade level teams and why their kid should come late and leave early. Parents can be exhausting. The great parents that just sold popcorn and hotdogs at the concession stand and let their kids just play and be coached were awesome. But it only takes a few parents to upset a team or sport. Unfortunate.
He had enough. Now parents have a bull pen area they can’t leave depending on the sport. They till then had a parents advisory board and volunteers. Gone for everyone. No more input on uniforms or anything. It is better. Coaches coach. Kids learn and play. Know it all parents were finally silent. Majority elated.
You basically listed most of my concerns over the past 2 years.
However, as someone on the athletic board and a coach, I hope that I have more say on how our school handles youth sports and not just expected to “shut up and sell popcorn”.
Someone has to make the decisions on those things, without an athletic board there wouldn’t be an athletic program. In youth sports, it should be parents on these boards, not outsiders, imo.
Select sports are different, those won’t be player parent boards, but should still put the general well being of kids first and foremost above anything else. Even our academy sends seasonal surveys asking for feedback. At the end of the day, it’s “our” kids. Fees and/or fund raising shouldn’t be the only time they want to hear from us.
Without involved parents, especially former athletes, at any competitive or non competitive level, we would have never seen things like pitch count rules and no head balls prior to a certain age, which falls under general well being., had all of the parents of the injured kids just continued to stay silent, more and more kids would have been medically out of sports before finishing high school, with a heck of a lot more injuries as well even if they weren’t career ending.
We have so many problems with youth sports in this country, coaches and programs who expect one sport athletes all while knowing that it’s against every orthopedic recommendation, who push kids too hard and overlook their health. As well as too many bad coaches who drive kids out of sports, because the coach doesn’t know how to handle a youth team. I do hope that parents continue to speak up and be involved for the youth players in sports... it’s about the youth, not a coach. I also hope coaches and organizations realize that parental input and open communication is an integral part of youth sports. Parents are trusting us with their kids, possible injuries, confidence, so much in development.. we shouldn’t shut ourselves off from them. I couldn’t do that with the families of the kids that I coach. I would never allow my child to play for an organization with that mentality. Philosophy is the most important part of a youth program- school, recreational, or select/travel.
Obnoxious parents on the sideline are something different, and are unacceptable at all levels. One rule that I think works well to avoid parent-coach confrontations is the “no contact for 24 hours after a game”. I think that’s best for all. It’s also good to have team admins who act as a buffer between coaches and parents in select sports, when needed. Coaches also face plenty of abuse from irate parents and I think the admins and waiting time have helped.
ETA- after writing the paragraph I had to knock on wood.
. We’ve been sooooo lucky that our soccer team has not had any completely demanding parents who think their kid is the next Messi and cause problems with other parents, players, and the coach. I do not take this for granted, as I know this is rare, even within our club. I hope it remains this way for as long as possible. We’ve had a tight knit group even with all of the player changes over the past few years. The new families have fit right in so far. I realize that both T and I are lucky for that..it could have gone much differently.
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