PARENTS - Need advice

[NashvilleMouse]

Parents, my wife and I plan on starting a family very soon and we are in debate on how many kids would be appropriate. Personally, I would like 3 kids (future CMs) but my wife thinks there would be a "middle child" complex. 4 might be a little much for us and 2 is not enough... IMHO. Since I am an only child, I really do not know. Does anyone have any first-hand experience on this issue that they could share? I know we will be blessed with how ever many children God intends for us, but let's just pretend we decide on a number.

Thanks for any thoughts.

 

[MouseMadness]

Well, I've GOT 4, and i've gotta say that 3 was the hardest transition for me. Maybe it's because the 4th is such an "easy" baby, but she didn't affect me as much as the third one did. *shrugs* LOL Anyway... I guess this is something you'd have to decide for yourself when the time comes, HOWEVER, 2 was a great number! No "only child" and no "middle child" (keep in mind with 4 kids, you really do end up with 2 middle children. ) I'm experiencing this now. :hammer:

Good luck.

 

[Tramp]

Originally posted by NashvilleMouse
Parents, my wife and I plan on starting a family very soon and we are in debate on how many kids would be appropriate. Personally, I would like 3 kids (future CMs) but my wife thinks there would be a "middle child" complex. 4 might be a little much for us and 2 is not enough... IMHO. Since I am an only child, I really do not know. Does anyone have any first-hand experience on this issue that they could share? I know we will be blessed with how ever many children God intends for us, but let's just pretend we decide on a number.

Thanks for any thoughts.

You and the wife have pretty much eliminated 2 or 3 so the only possible answer would be 4. Start lookin' for a second job, my friend!:wave:

 

[Shaman]

Well...I don't have kids...too young (thinking about having kids makes me shudder)....but I think a good number is three...while I can't really speak about a middle child complex...cause I'm the oldest....I think it really isn't a big issue....

 

[MouseMadness]

LMAO Tramp! :lol:

 

[Legacy]

I think two is a good number personally.

(But I'm not a parent so you don't to consider my opinion... I understand )

 

[JBSLJames]

I've got two, girls, 2 1/2 years apart. This works great for us.

I am, however, the 5th of 5 kids in my family and my wife is the 3rd of 3.

I hope that God truly blesses you in this area for I strongly believe that raising children is God's plan for a couple. (if able, if not, providing a good example to our youth).

 

[NashvilleMouse]

Personally, I don't think 3 is all that bad. 4 kids would be a lot. I appreciate your post, JBSLJames. 2 girls, wow! I hope I have a few girls so I can torment the boyfriends like I was tormented when I was in high school. :drevil:

Mousemadness, do you have a big house? Where do you put all those kids? Our new house will have 4 bedrooms (including our own) so three kids would be ideal. As long works for Disney and get's daddy a lifetime pass, I will be happy! What is it like to take 4 kids to Disney?

 

[tigsmom]

I'm the third of four (2 boys then 2 girls), my DH is the oldest of four (all boys). We have 2 girls 15 & 8.(God's plan not mine...I was aiming for 4. )

 

[MouseMadness]

Originally posted by NashvilleMouse
Personally, I don't think 3 is all that bad. 4 kids would be a lot. I appreciate your post, JBSLJames. 2 girls, wow! I hope I have a few girls so I can torment the boyfriends like I was tormented when I was in high school. :drevil:

Mousemadness, do you have a big house? Where do you put all those kids? Our new house will have 4 bedrooms (including our own) so three kids would be ideal. As long works for Disney and get's daddy a lifetime pass, I will be happy! What is it like to take 4 kids to Disney?

My house is 1200 square feet. :lol: Not exactly "big." 3 bedrooms. We're getting by for the next few years. My husband is in his second year of a 5 year residency, so we're just getting by. My in laws make our Disney trips possible. I call them St. mom and St. dad. :lol: 4 kids at WDW was a nightmare when it was just my husband and I dealing with them, but we usually have at least one other adult with us, so then it's okay. They're a lot of fun. And they're all girls. *says prayer for self for those fast approaching teenage years*

 

[NashvilleMouse]

Re: Re: PARENTS - Need advice

Originally posted by Tramp
You and the wife have pretty much eliminated 2 or 3 so the only possible answer would be 4. Start lookin' for a second job, my friend!:wave:

:lol: :lol: :lol:
You mean sorting the chicken nugget dipping sauce at McDonalds won't cover 4 kids? I am up for promotion in May.

 

[NashvilleMouse]

Originally posted by MouseMadness
My house is 1200 square feet. :lol: Not exactly "big." 3 bedrooms. We're getting by for the next few years. My husband is in his second year of a 5 year residency, so we're just getting by. My in laws make our Disney trips possible. I call them St. mom and St. dad. :lol: 4 kids at WDW was a nightmare when it was just my husband and I dealing with them, but we usually have at least one other adult with us, so then it's okay. They're a lot of fun. And they're all girls. *says prayer for self for those fast approaching teenage years*

Sweet Jesus, you have four girls? Please give my regards to your poor husband! I hope your hot water tank is over 200 gallons! So your girls are sharing a room? That's a good idea. Don't they want to kill each other?

 

[WDWFREAK53]

I wish I had 4 girls...

anyhoo...

I'm banking on having 2...2 is good for me...my IDEAL situation would be to have a boy and girl...boy being the oldest (NMouse...so he can help me torment the "dates" :lol If this doesn't happen and I get two of each...I would try for a third...but 3 is my limit.

Oh, and Nmouse...about the living situation...my grandparents on my father's side had 6 kids(5 boys and 1 girl)...living in a 2 bedroom house...with a finished basement...and this was a small house...(And they all grew up just fine)

 

[The Mom]

I'm the youngest, and only girl, of 5. My husband is the youngest, and only boy, of 5. (We were meant for each other. :lol: ) My oldest brother is 10 years older than I; his oldest sister is 5 years older than he. (there are twins)

We have two children, a 20 year old girl and 10 year old boy...it just worked out that way. So, each of them has the "only" child syndrome. Although it was difficult going back to changing diapers, etc. there are also some benefits. After a certain age, I rarely had to hire a babysitter, and now my son is almost old enough to stay home by himself for short periods of time at night. (He already does during the day, as long as my neighbors are home.) It's also nice to not have two of them in college at the same time, or getting married close together.

BTW, we had a three bedroom house when I was growing up. As the only girl, I had my own room. My brothers had two sets of bunkbeds in their room.

 

[DisneyPhD]

I am 4 of 4 children (3 older brothers, the only girl) Hubby has one older brother. His father is an only child, and becasue of this we have decided we can't have just one (even though we are perfectly happy with the one we have.)


My advice in planning how many children to have is, have one see how it goes, how you feel and how your wife handles pregnancy and childbrith. Then when and if you feel ready, see about having another. After that see how you feel, stop there, or have another. I am not a big fan of having many kids close together. I think it has it's benifits later when the kids are older, but just way to hard on both the parents and the kids when they are young.

Little PhD (our 1st) will be 3 in the end of March. If all goes well we will have a second child Aug 2004. Personally I am thinking 2 pregnancys is enough for me, I am a wimp. However I am not 100 % sure I want to be done having kids after this one, so who knows? However hubby is ready to go under the knife when number 2 is born.

Also depending on what you have 1st, (boy or girl) and what kind of child they are, often changes your ideas if you want more. Many people want at least one son and daughter, so when they get 2 of the same right away, they try again (keep in mind my parents had to have 3 boys before they finally got a girl.)

 

[The Mom]

Originally posted by DisneyPhD


Also depending on what you have 1st, (boy or girl) and what kind of child they are, often changes your ideas if you want more. Many people want at least one son and daughter, so when they get 2 of the same right away, they try again (keep in mind my parents had to have 3 boys before they finally got a girl.)

Read my post.

 

[pinkrose]

I have two kids, 2ys 5 months apart. My son is 9 and my daughter is 6 (till April). Right now, two works out for me. If I had another one, I couldn't drive my car :lol: (only room for 2 in the back). j/k I would like to have at least one more, but as of right now, that's not going to happen. Two is a good number though.

This May will be their 3rd trip to Disney. Their first was when they were 6 and 4. They were at great ages for Disney. We didn't even leave the park for naps. They sat in a stroller from attraction to attraction, and did just fine.

 

[DisneyPhD]

Mom, we must of been posting at the same time!!!!!!!!!! As the only girl I also was the only one who never had a share a room! I don't think my brother who is above me really has ever forgiven me for being born and stealing is room! Infact when I was born my dad called home and my brother answered the phone. My dad told him I was a girl, and he went and told everyone I was a boy, it was 2 days later until they knew they had a sister!

I do belive if you get your heart set on a certian number of ______ of children, you will be disapointed (or surprized) at home point.

Pink Rose, Right now I can get my DD and the new one in the car I have now. However I have 2 newphews and a neice that are always with us (like right now, long weekend) and we need to get a van for them. How fair is that?

 

[Erika]

My mom was a middle child, and she tells EVERYONE who will listen not to have 3 kids :lol: She feels an even number is the way to go.

Personally I don't know that it matters how many you have, as long as you are able to give each one the attention he or she deserves

Edit- regarding the issue of trying for a girl/boy- I have seen a lot of people try this (and fail :lol: ). But we have patients at our office who did it the fool-proof way: They had a girl and wanted a boy, so they adopted one from overseas. It's expensive and difficult, but at least they had the gender guarantee! And an orphaned little boy found a loving home.

 

[NashvilleMouse]

Originally posted by Erika
My mom was a middle child, and she tells EVERYONE who will listen not to have 3 kids :lol: She feels an even number is the way to go.

Personally I don't know that it matters how many you have, as long as you are able to give each one the attention he or she deserves

Edit- regarding the issue of trying for a girl/boy- I have seen a lot of people try this (and fail :lol: ). But we have patients at our office who did it the fool-proof way: They had a girl and wanted a boy, so they adopted one from overseas. It's expensive and difficult, but at least they had the gender guarantee! And an orphaned little boy found a loving home.

My wife appreciates your post. (She worries about the middle child "syndrome") And you are right, adoption wouldn't be so bad either. I have co-workers that have adopted.

Looks like everyone posting has had at least two children. But DisneyPHD has a good point. Wait and see how the first one goes and then decide where you want to go from there. Hell, we just might go for 6! :lol: :lookaroun

I thought about having the boys "bunk up" in the same room if necessary. But, won't they kill each other when they are teenagers?