Hell 2, The Sequel - No more room in Hell

[tigsmom]

Ohh...since Jill wears thongs...a thong wedgie...

Isn't that redundant?

 

[Irrawaddy Erik]

Isn't that redundant?

Floss daily... :lookaroun

 

[WDWScottieBoy]

My older brother called my younger brother in the next room to turn his stereo down so he could blast the computer speakers...sounds like we're all getting lazy.

*calls Gary for a Vanilla Coke*

 

[Hakunamatata]

Floss daily... :lookaroun

Mint or cherry flavored??? :lookaroun :lookaroun

 

[Lil'mermaid]

My friend got locked out of a room at school the other day while we were cleaning up and he called my phone to be let in. Knocking at the door is just too difficult for him.

 

[garyhoov]

:lol:
"Queen of the House of Madness" - What a wonderful pulp-gothic tone that has! I may ask people to start referring to me as that.

Seriously Christy (and hopefully I won't get hairy palms or go blind from quoting myself). I've got an old story I'm re-writing, and "Quothom" would make a great name for one freakish character I'm working on. Can I have your permission to use it? If it ever gets published, I'll give you an acknowledgement.

 

[MouseMadness]

Seriously Christy (and hopefully I won't get hairy palms or go blind from quoting myself). I've got an old story I'm re-writing, and "Quothom" would make a great name for one freakish character I'm working on. Can I have your permission to use it? If it ever gets published, I'll give you an acknowledgement.

LOL!! :lol: Oh, Gary, that one would've flown right by me, but I give you full permission to use that name. :wave: Acknowledgement isn't necessary, but that's so cool!! Glad I could be of help! :lol: :wave:

 

[garyhoov]

LOL!! :lol: Oh, Gary, that one would've flown right by me, but I give you full permission to use that name. :wave: Acknowledgement isn't necessary, but that's so cool!! Glad I could be of help! :lol: :wave:

Thanks. . . of course what are the chances that a book with a character named "Quothom" could ever get published:lookaroun . . . but if I can trick anyone into publishing it, I'll make sure to mention you.

 

[figmentmom]

Here's one for you.

6 YO = "Daddy, can you get me a kleenex"
Daddy = "Yes" and daddy hands 6 YO kleenex
6 YO = " Ok daddy, im done with it..... HERE! (post application of nasal residue)
Daddy = Stands dumfounded.

Tissues full of nasal residue? Please. That is the least of the many things Moms have to deal with! Since my kids were little, I have had purses full of used kleenex, spit-out gum, sticky candy wrappers, used wipes...at one point, even my husband was handing me icky stuff (I immediately re-educated him... :lol: )

 

[DisneyJill]

Thanks. . . of course what are the chances that a book with a character named "Quothom" could ever get published:lookaroun . . . but if I can trick anyone into publishing it, I'll make sure to mention you.

And you'll be sure to mention the princess of the house, too, right? :lookaroun

 

[DisneyJill]

Ohh...since Jill wears thongs...a thong wedgie...

OUCH!!

(someone teach me how to quote 2 people in one post and I won't double post...hint hint...)

 

[MouseMadness]

Thanks. . . of course what are the chances that a book with a character named "Quothom" could ever get published:lookaroun . . . but if I can trick anyone into publishing it, I'll make sure to mention you.

Hmmm, well, the thing is you have really gotten my interest here. I wanna read it!! :lol: So I'm counting on it getting published!

Also, when the movie gets made, I wanna play Quothom. :king: (Assuming Quothom is a woman.) :lookaroun

 

[tigsmom]

...

(someone teach me how to quote 2 people in one post and I won't double post...hint hint...)

Check your PMs. :wave:

 

[DisneyJill]

Check your PMs. :wave:

hmmm....

Originally posted by garyhoov
Thanks. . . of course what are the chances that a book with a character named "Quothom" could ever get published . . . but if I can trick anyone into publishing it, I'll make sure to mention you.

I did it!!! :sohappy: Thanks Mad!!

 

[garyhoov]

Hmmm, well, the thing is you have really gotten my interest here. I wanna read it!! :lol: So I'm counting on it getting published!

Also, when the movie gets made, I wanna play Quothom. :king: (Assuming Quothom is a woman.) :lookaroun

Well I've still got a lot of work to do, but here is the title page and introduction to hold you over until I can bribe some publisher:

The Land of the Blind​

(A Coming-of-Youth Story)​

Gary Hoover​

In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king
-Desiderius Erasmus



In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is seldom seen.
-A Salada tea bag



I know the wind-swept mystical air
It means I’d like to see your underwear
-Morrissey



Introduction:

Most people who are my age (old, over thirty) have come to the conclusion that there are no single, unifying, universal truths that help to describe life as we know it.

Some people would argue (not me, but people who give a damn) that this lack of a universal truth is, itself, a universal truth.

Others might argue that this inherent contradiction in the fabric of truth makes perfect sense and helps to explain otherwise unexplainable things such as the success of American Idol.

A recent study in The Journal of Inane Federally Funded Medical Research concluded that excessive thought on the matter can cause butt pimples in laboratory rats, however there are three proven methods for driving such unwanted thoughts from one’s mind:
· Drinking beer
· Watching network television
· Perusing a copy of Reader’s Digest

I once tried all three of these at once. The clouds parted, God revealed himself to me, made some rude sounds with his armpit and said: “Well, I’d say this planet is about due for a right good annihilation.”

This story is not about universal truths.

This story would not know a universal truth if it had a sign around its neck saying: “Hey there, look at me. I’m a universal truth.”

This story is about college life. Loud music, booze, ______, butt pimples on rats and rude armpit sounds.

Oh, it’s also a story of madness.

Whose madness? I’m afraid I haven’t figured that out yet.

 

[MouseMadness]

Well I've still got a lot of work to do, but here is the title page and introduction to hold you over until I can bribe some publisher:

The Land of the Blind
(A Coming-of-Youth Story)

Gary Hoover​

In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king
-Desiderius Erasmus



In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is seldom seen.
-A Salada tea bag



I know the wind-swept mystical air
It means I’d like to see your underwear
-Morrissey



Introduction:

Most people who are my age (old, over thirty) have come to the conclusion that there are no single, unifying, universal truths that help to describe life as we know it.

Some people would argue (not me, but people who give a damn) that this lack of a universal truth is, itself, a universal truth.

Others might argue that this inherent contradiction in the fabric of truth makes perfect sense and helps to explain otherwise unexplainable things such as the success of American Idol.

A recent study in The Journal of Inane Federally Funded Medical Research concluded that excessive thought on the matter can cause butt pimples in laboratory rats, however there are three proven methods for driving such unwanted thoughts from one’s mind:
· Drinking beer
· Watching network television
· Perusing a copy of Reader’s Digest

I once tried all three of these at once. The clouds parted, God revealed himself to me, made some rude sounds with his armpit and said: “Well, I’d say this planet is about due for a right good annihilation.”

This story is not about universal truths.

This story would not know a universal truth if it had a sign around its neck saying: “Hey there, look at me. I’m a universal truth.”

This story is about college life. Loud music, booze, ______, butt pimples on rats and rude armpit sounds.

Oh, it’s also a story of madness.

Whose madness? I’m afraid I haven’t figured that out yet.

:sohappy: Look, you said Madness!! :lol: :king:

Now I'm not feeling so dumb for picking my name. :lol: :lookaroun

I like it!! Made me giggle quite a bit. :lol:

 

[DisneyJill]

Gary, are you familiar with Dave Barry? Your humor is similar to his...dry and sarcastic but literally makes me spit my drink out at the computer because it's so funny. :wave:

 

[garyhoov]

:sohappy: Look, you said Madness!! :lol: :king:

Now I'm not feeling so dumb for picking my name. :lol: :lookaroun

I like it!! Made me giggle quite a bit. :lol:

That's why I like the "Queen of the House of Madness" title so much. It fits perfectly. I'm still not sure if I'll use the name or not, but either way, I'll make sure I mention you and Jill in the acknowledgements if, for no other reason, than to start rumors.

While I've never published any fiction before, I am a published author:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0471970557/104-8851610-0810342?v=glance&vi=contents

(check the "liquid fluoroelastomers" chapter three quarters of the way down) so I do have a shot.

 

[garyhoov]

Gary, are you familiar with Dave Barry? Your humor is similar to his...dry and sarcastic but literally makes me spit my drink out at the computer because it's so funny. :wave:

Well thank you! I am familiar with his stuff, and I'd consider that good company.:king:

(of course he actually makes money, and I do most of this for free . . .:lookaroun )

 

[DisneyJill]

Well thank you! I am familiar with his stuff, and I'd consider that good company.:king:

(of course he actually makes money, and I do most of this for free . . .:lookaroun )

All in good time, my friend. All in good time.