I think Tony's calling Steve to the mat handled this appropriately for me. He pretty much says 'its on YOU'.. leaves.. and even when they come crawling back.. he still tells them to pound sand. The use of Potts' approval to bridge the gap and settle Tony's perpetual unease about which life to lead is key. Now, why is that so easy for her, now that she has even MORE at stake? That could be argued as 'too easy'... but I like using her as the 'green light' that allows Tony to shift from conflicted... to determined.
The whole Thanos conflict serves as a great distraction away from people's individual conflicts... it's hard to keep focusing on 1-1 petty things when someone is basically saying 'half the universe is on the line'. That's what works for me for the other minor characters. Tony and Steve are painted as the most 'stubborn' if you want to call it.. and they reach a compromise... rather than simply 'forgiveness'.