The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
Goofyernmost said:
I can relate to that. I live close to my girls but because of this damn plague, I don't see them often. The weather here hasn't been awful but the cold air (low 30's) make it to cold to play golf and that is what kept me in tune with the family. I don't call them, not because I think it is their job to call me, but it saddens me a little that they don't call to at least check up. I am almost 73 with a list of problems that on the surface aren't life threatening, but could quickly turn into it. I don't call because they are very busy with work, with their kids, with their husbands and life in general. If you have ever called someone for a chat and figure out quickly that you have called at a bad time, but they don't want to tell you. So I tell them please call me. I'm idol most of the time. I'm on the computer a lot, but the phone is within 10 inches of me. I have to admit that it bothers me a little. I don't think that they don't care, but I could be lying here dead for weeks before anyone would call me. I don't know the reason why, maybe it is something I am doing that upsets them or with everything else going on, or maybe they just innocently forget. I would know pretty quickly if any of the family got ill because someone in the group would let me know. There is no one here to call them if something were happening to me.

Is that selfish of me to expect to be checked on occasionally. I had my 2nd covid shot last Saturday. No one had called to ask if I am OK.

To be honest, one of them does check Facebook and can see if I posted anything recently. The other doesn't do social media, "anymore". I thought we had a good relationship, but now I am starting to get paranoid and wonder just how strong our relationship really is. Vent Done!!!
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I'm sorry they don't call. I can't answer for them. I used to let my dad call me because he generally didn't have his phone on unless he was calling me, and then as soon as he hung up, he turned the phone off again. It was very hard to get ahold of him. Even when he had a land line, he'd fall asleep and not hear the phone ringing. More than once, I called, couldn't get him on the phone, and sent friends looking for him to make sure he was ok. But he lived 20 miles outside of the nearest town, 40 outside the other town, and lived alone. It was harder for people to get out there to check on him.

I'd guess for your daughters, it might be more of a case where they remember to call at times that they aren't able to....like, driving to work. "Oh, I need to remember to call dad today when I get home!" and then by the time they are in a position to call you, they've forgotten. I do that ALL.THE.TIME....not so much with calling, since my parents are both gone, but with things like remembering to ask my husband about something, or to pay a certain bill, or look something up on the internet. I think of it when I'm not able to do whatever it is....then when I COULD, I've forgotten.

But I'm sure it doesn't feel good, like you feel abandoned. I'm sure that's not their intent, but it still hurts. I'm sorry.
 
Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
MySmallWorldof4 said:
I called my stepdad the day after and the day after that after he got his first vaccination. He is all alone also. I call him a few times a week. He is 84 now and I worry he is alone and have begged him to sell his house and move in with us. He is still able bodied and thinks our house would just be too noisy for him with the kids and pets. He has lived alone for over 20 years now since my mom passed and I got married. He also for some reason doesn’t want to leave Queens for the country of PA. Makes me sad actually. I worry about him.
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My dad was the same way. Obviously, I wasn't begging him to move here, but I did beg him to move into town because he was so far out in the country. Every time there was a storm, I worried that he was without power or water out there, all alone. And then he started having mini strokes and I was terrified he was going to have a stroke or a heart attack, and it could be days before someone thought "Oh hey, I haven't heard from Dale in a while...I should check on him." There was a blizzard one year and he was stuck at the ranch with no power for 3 days, and no water. A tornado went through once and he was supposed to be at a family reunion in Kansas, so I wasn't worried until a cousin asked me if he was ok because he hadn't shown up to the family reunion. The tornado had knocked out all the power and phone lines, so he couldn't call me to let me know he was ok. The tornado had broken all his windows and ripped the roof off his trailer, so he had to buy a new one, but at least he was ok.

But someone reminded me that he had lived in that same place his whole life, and he was in his 80s when he started having the mini strokes...it was the only home he knew and moving would have been scary. Everything is getting harder, their bodies don't work like they used to....at least the home they have always lived in is familiar, like a security blanket. It was so hard to always be worried, but I understood it would have been hard for him to move, too. Just too many changes. My dad died a few months after finding out he was going to have to move. He didn't own the land his house was on....they had sold it to the coal company before my parents even got married, and they leased it back from the coal company. But the coal company decided to start mining that bit of land, and to do that, they had to clear it of living things because they open it up with explosives. It wouldn't be safe to live where he was, so they had given him notice that his lease wouldn't be renewed. I think that was probably the final straw for him...he couldn't face more changes. I was far away, my brother didn't have much contact with him, he'd been having the health issues, friends were passing away frequently...I think he just didn't feel he had much left, and now that was being taken away too. Maybe your dad is just clinging to what's familiar and comfortable. There's so little else they have control over.
 
donaldtoo

donaldtoo

Well-Known Member
MySmallWorldof4 said:
Really glad that your family is doing well, and have not been impacted by your freakish winter weather. We may actually hit 50 next week! Looking forward to that. I think this may be our last cold week.
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Thank you..!!! :)
“Freakish” would be a good description...!!!!! 😜🤪:hilarious:
I had every intention of tryin’ to get into the office this mornin’, but, a section of the highway I use was closed in both directions, and the other curvy, hilly roads just aren’t an option right now...! 🤷‍♂️
 
Songbird76

Songbird76

Well-Known Member
Goofyernmost said:
I never really got wrapped up in the "ice age" theory, but climate change seemed absolutely, unmistakably obvious to anyone paying attention. I stated that I remember the first MAJOR snow storm in the south in like 100 years in 1980. Then after that when we made our yearly February Trips to Florida it was very noticeable that every year it was getting just a little warmer in the north and cooler in the south. I can remember when you could set your watch on -20 or -30 always being around the middle of February and would stay that way for a couple of weeks. It was always that temperature in Vermont at the end of February. Then through the years it was getting warmer and warmer. Still winter but the huge, long lasting "frigid" cold started to ease up a little and frost was more frequent in Florida. It would warm up quicker in the south, but over the last 40 years the south has been colder and overall, the north has been warmer and less snow. This year might not indicate that but on the average, I'd bet that each year winter gets milder in the north. I think I mentioned that sometime in those earlier years I predicted that someday people will go north for the winter warm weather and south for winter sports. None of us will be around that long, but I still think it will happen.
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They compared our weather in the last 10 years with 100 years ago on the news this morning. 100 years ago, winter started earlier and lasted 28 days longer than the current trend. They defined Spring as the first day that temps hit 15 celsius. It used to be the end of March....lately, the average is March 11th, and now we're supposed to reach that already this weekend. So it's definitely warming up overall.
 
MySmallWorldof4

MySmallWorldof4

Well-Known Member
donaldtoo said:
Thank you..!!! :)
“Freakish” would be a good description...!!!!! 😜🤪:hilarious:
I had every intention of tryin’ to get into the office this mornin’, but, a section of the highway I use was closed in both directions, and the other curvy, hilly roads just aren’t an option right now...! 🤷‍♂️
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We are used to this kind of weather also, and still wouldn’t purposely venture out in it. I-81 banned all empty trailers for today because of the impending bad weather.
 
donaldtoo

donaldtoo

Well-Known Member
MySmallWorldof4 said:
We are used to this kind of weather also, and still wouldn’t purposely venture out in it. I-81 banned all empty trailers for today because of the impending bad weather.
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I saw some footage of some of the roads earlier, and they looked pretty deserted. Even if folks could make it to work, they probably wouldn’t have any water or electricity, or both.
No point in even tryin’ to get to work.
 
Goofyernmost

Goofyernmost

Well-Known Member
Songbird76 said:
My dad was the same way. Obviously, I wasn't begging him to move here, but I did beg him to move into town because he was so far out in the country. Every time there was a storm, I worried that he was without power or water out there, all alone. And then he started having mini strokes and I was terrified he was going to have a stroke or a heart attack, and it could be days before someone thought "Oh hey, I haven't heard from Dale in a while...I should check on him." There was a blizzard one year and he was stuck at the ranch with no power for 3 days, and no water. A tornado went through once and he was supposed to be at a family reunion in Kansas, so I wasn't worried until a cousin asked me if he was ok because he hadn't shown up to the family reunion. The tornado had knocked out all the power and phone lines, so he couldn't call me to let me know he was ok. The tornado had broken all his windows and ripped the roof off his trailer, so he had to buy a new one, but at least he was ok.

But someone reminded me that he had lived in that same place his whole life, and he was in his 80s when he started having the mini strokes...it was the only home he knew and moving would have been scary. Everything is getting harder, their bodies don't work like they used to....at least the home they have always lived in is familiar, like a security blanket. It was so hard to always be worried, but I understood it would have been hard for him to move, too. Just too many changes. My dad died a few months after finding out he was going to have to move. He didn't own the land his house was on....they had sold it to the coal company before my parents even got married, and they leased it back from the coal company. But the coal company decided to start mining that bit of land, and to do that, they had to clear it of living things because they open it up with explosives. It wouldn't be safe to live where he was, so they had given him notice that his lease wouldn't be renewed. I think that was probably the final straw for him...he couldn't face more changes. I was far away, my brother didn't have much contact with him, he'd been having the health issues, friends were passing away frequently...I think he just didn't feel he had much left, and now that was being taken away too. Maybe your dad is just clinging to what's familiar and comfortable. There's so little else they have control over.
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Wonderfully said, and believe me until you get to the "advanced" ages no one really has any idea what being aware of your own mortality is like. I'm not afraid of dying and have accepted that there is a lot more time behind me then ahead, and I'm OK with that, but when you are alone and feeling like people don't care it is hard to not think about it. I appreciate the my mind is still sharp. I hope it is, it's hard to tell when you are inside yourself, but physically it is so discouraging to not be able to do what you once did without any thought. I used to carry a 100 lb. window AC up and down my basement stairs by myself. I don't think I can even pick up that much anymore. I've always been "strong like bull", on Christmas eve I was at my daughters and had brought one of those Shrimp trays for party food. They come with a little bowl of Cocktail Sauce that had a plastic seal cover over it. I, this big hulk of a guy could not get that cover off the bowl. Couldn't do it. My 17 year old granddaughter was standing next to me and I asked her to see if she could get it off. She took it and with one move it was removed. Talk about one's sails deflating. That will do it.

I'm not really complaining because I have had a good life comparatively. My problem if there was one, was that I lived in a State with no real opportunity to make something of yourself. Unless your were named Bernie Sanders or Ben or Jerry. Beautiful state, but scenery doesn't pay your bills and allow for unlimited financial security. My life turned out good, but didn't live up even close to my own expectations. The part when you finally realize that it is to late to start over now.
 
93boomer

93boomer

Premium Member
donaldtoo said:
We still have power and gas, but, as of a little while ago, we no longer have running water.
Megan, Emmy, and Daniel are same, as well as my folks.
It’s not a frozen pipe issue, but a delivery issue.
Fortunately, we have plenty of bottled water, but, if it’s off for a while, we’ll probably hafta’ melt snow to use for the toilets...!!!!! :D:hilarious:
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You know that works in an emergency.😉My DD has had to use pool water before when their pump went out.
 

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