working out for Disney

[Sans Souci]

I have no idea how many square feet our house is, but it's about the same size as the trailer house I grew up in. We do get natural light in the winter, which I do love, but some of that is going to change this year. They are making these houses more energy efficient, so they are replacing the facades and putting in double glass in the windows, which will no longer be wall-to-wall. It won't be enough of a change to rearrange furniture, though.

But as far as size goes, our master bedroom is just barely big enough to put a queen bed and 2 dressers in, and an armoir. (There's a tiny built-in closet that's really only big enough for one person's clothes that need to hang) We bought a new bed a year or so ago now with storage underneath it just because we don't have enough space in the house. Our son's bedroom is big enough for a single bed on one wall with a dresser and bookcase on the other wall, with about a foot and a half path to get between. That's about the size of my bedroom back home. And my mom's bedroom was about the size of our bedroom here, but she had an ensuite and we don't. She also had a big sliding door closet for clothes and a smaller storage closet for towels and such. Our kitchen is basically the same size as our son's room. It has counter and cupboard space on both sides, has a fridge on one side, oven and dishwasher on the other, and it's big enough that 2 people can pass each other if they squeeze. And the Dining room fits a 6 person table, but we don't have much room to walk around it. We only have the one shower/bath, and we have a 2nd toilet downstairs. This was a source of frustration to me when we moved in, because my MIL was determined that I didn't deserve to have a 2nd toilet AND a bathtub AND laundry facilities. She kept telling me I couldn't have it all and I kept saying yes I could. She called me every couple of days to tell me something else I could "give up" in order to have my bathtub. She wanted me to put my washer and dryer in the bathroom instead of having a bathtub. I said no, the closet in the hallway was big enough for the washer and dryer and we had already talked to a contracter about making a water hookup for the washer in that closet. Then she told me I'd have to give up the downstairs toilet for the washer and dryer, because it already had a water source. I reminded her we were having one put in that closet. Then she told me I'd have to put the laundry in the kitchen downstairs, and I said no way was I carting my dirty underwear in through my food prep area, the laundry was going into the closet. Period. Then when the contractor got to the house, I overheard her telling him the laundry was going in the bathroom upstairs and had to put him straight that she was wrong, it was going into the closet as we had discussed, because I wanted a bathtub, and then she started the argument all over again. She drove me absolutely nuts telling me what I could and couldn't have in my own house that WE were paying for, and when I asked her why I couldn't have something, she'd say "I didn't have that in MY first house!" In the end, my house and my money...she didn't get a vote. I have a bathtub (not common in the Netherlands), a washer and dryer, AND a 2nd toilet, and a dishwasher in the kitchen where she said I had to put my laundry. It's cramped, but I fit in everything I needed.

That's funny that your MIL keep telling you you couldn't have it all and you proved her wrong. Telling you that you don't "deserve" a 2nd bathroom/tub/laundry. WTH. And then she tried to tell the contractor that the w/d was going where she wanted it? I guess because she didn't have these things in her first house, you shouldn't either? Parents should be happy when their children do better than they did, not envious, imo. It means, as a parent, you set them up for success.

 

[Sans Souci]

Hello-

I did my YouTube workout this morning. I did skip a few ads this AM, since I had some things I needed to get done this morning. It's weird, because some days will have a reasonable amount of ads and others are just ad after ad. What doesn't help is that this is a four week program, so she has you string together 2-3 workout videos a day, so you get a ton of ads each time you start a new video.

We're not getting our new furnace until next Friday. I am low key looking forward to that.

I started a loaf of sourdough bread this AM. This is a new method I am trying, so I am going to see if it's any better than the one I've been using. This method is little less hands on and doesn't require as much baby sitting. Also, I am proud to announce that I am taking it to the next level with my sourdough starter--the one I have lovingly fed and nurtured since the beginning of the year. I have given him the name "Mr. Mojo."

I watched the series, "The Right Stuff" on Disney+/NatGeo and I got sucked into other NatGeo programs about the Mercury and Apollo missions. "The Right Stuff" was OK, but it was entertaining. It was a like a soap opera that focused on the competition between Alan Shepard and John Glenn. It was not what I recall old school National Geographic shows were like.

 

[HouCuseChickie]

That all sounds awful! I'm so sorry. I'm going to send you a PM so I don't take up the whole thread here. Sooooo many red flags.

Thanks. I saw the PM and will reply later. I decided to take the day off to decompress and look at some possible replacement vehicles. I'm just so mentally spent right now.

 

[HouCuseChickie]

This sounds so stressful and I feel so badly for your daughter, especially when I read about how upset she got when she thought her friend had killed herself. Awful. She honestly sounds like she has a personality disorder. From what you've described here, she sounds like she is either borderline or a narcissist. The cutting and emotional manipulation/oversharing for attention makes me think borderline, but the lack of remorse and empathy makes me think she is a narc. At any rate, I would keep a log of these incidences with dates to pull from when you contact the school and the coaches. This is totally unacceptable and goes beyond teen girl pettiness. This is pro-level manipulation. She is likely going to try and reverse the offender and victim here (since she already did), so don't be shocked when a load of codswallop comes out of her mouth. Do not let her direct the narrative. Anything can happen, but you might have to transfer. It like her mom just changes schools when it gets too hot for her daughter. Also, consider if she is disciplined, she will get back at you and your daughter in a very underground manner. She might blame your husband for something when she slept over, she might say you helped. I know this might sound ridiculous, but look at what's she done already. Forewarned is forearmed. I'm not trying to be over the top here, but I would consider getting legal advice. All it takes is an accusation and even if it's proven false, people remember the accusations.

Edited to add: She might threaten suicide and make a gesture, so keep that in mind. I know I sound over the top, but my mom grew up into one of these people and these stories make my spidey senses tingle. Pitting people against each other for fun, gossiping/creating drama, accusing friends' (plural) husbands of making passes at her, thereby destroying that friendship. When I was 15, she tried to kill herself and blamed my brother and me. I carried that guilt around for so long. I could go on and on. But these people rarely get help, because they lack self-awareness. My mother found a therapist who unknowingly validated her behavior because my mother made herself the victim in her story. When I would tell her I didn't like how she was treating me, she would say the therapist told her she was right. I am not trying to tell you what to do, but I would consider maybe seeing a therapist with your daughter. What she's been through sounds so traumatic and a good therapist will help you get the tools you need to deal with this girl. This isn't your garden variety bully here. This isn't even bullying, this is emotional terrorism.

Yeah, what I'm seeing seems to go beyond your run of the mill teen drama. It reminds me of cases I read about in my psychology courses and things detailed in the DSM. Considering everything else she's said that's been crazy, we're sort of bracing ourselves for potential lies about us as well. The kids go back to school on Monday and we'll see what the school admin says/does. We both discussed the free legal services our employers offer us if needed. The mere fact that there's an element of cyberbullying was what got this conversation started, but if she's going to spread around that her father used to molest her, what might she say about us?

While the girl is in therapy and is supposedly on some meds, whatever they're doing doesn't seem to be helping. I hadn't considered that the therapist might be validating the behavior and exacerbating things, but that's entirely possible. Either way, we're really going to have to keep a close eye on things.

 

[HouCuseChickie]

No working out today...in fact, we ate all of the stuff today too! Donuts and Mexican food! Not all at the same time

I called the dealer yesterday for a status on my VW and they still haven't gotten back with me. It's been about 1.5 weeks since I've heard from them, and I'm the one doing all of the contacting of late. Today marks the 24th day they've had my vehicle with this most recent A/C outage, and the 53rd day it's been in the shop altogether since it was purchased a year ago. You've seen me discussing various makes and models. I have spent the last week looking at things on the road and doing some digging into reviews to help narrow the field. I have to like it both inside and out and not feel like I'm buying into another lemon. I also need to feel like it's suitable for our road trip and softball needs, while not feeling like a beast either. After narrowing things down based on that, I took a vacation day today and we tested the Telluride, the CX-9, the Palisade, and the Explorer. If I can get VW to lemon the Atlas and do a repurchase rather than replacement, we'll be looking to get the Palisade. It's spring break here this week, and both girls were along for the rides to caste their votes. It's unanimous.

 

[Songbird76]

That's funny that your MIL keep telling you you couldn't have it all and you proved her wrong. Telling you that you don't "deserve" a 2nd bathroom/tub/laundry. WTH. And then she tried to tell the contractor that the w/d was going where she wanted it? I guess because she didn't have these things in her first house, you shouldn't either? Parents should be happy when their children do better than they did, not envious, imo. It means, as a parent, you set them up for success.

Well she never came right out and said in so many words that I didn't deserve to have those things, but just the fact that when I said "Why can't I? I've figured out how it will all work, and it's our house. Why can't I have it? " and she said "I didn't have all that in MY first house!" The implication is that I should have to struggle first and didn't deserve to have everything right off the bat. Which actually is stupid, because it WASN'T our first home and we didn't have all that in our first home. We lived in the US for a year, in an apartment. We didn't have laundry facilities, we didn't have a dishwasher, and we only had one toilet. When we moved to the Nethlerlands, we couldn't even find affordable housing and we lived with them for three years, where I had NOTHING of my own. I wasn't even allowed to use MY furniture or redecorate....3 years of someone else telling me when I was allowed to go upstairs to my bedroom or when I had to stay downstairs and watch TV programs I hated and/didn't understand, 3 years where I wasn't allowed to speak English when I was with them, even though I didn't really speak Dutch well. 3 years of being told I couldn't go out that night because they needed us to do something for them. We weren't treated as adults there...we would get ready to go out and they'd tell us we couldn't because we needed to clean the bathroom or they needed someone to be home to give the school keys (my FIL was the keeper of the keys for the school) to the night school class and THEY had made plans to go out, so we had to cancel ours. 3 years of them telling me how I was allowed to spend our money or what I wasn't allowed to buy. I think what it really boiled down to was that they were trying to "re-raise" me, because I wasn't Dutch and didn't do things the "Dutch" way. So they were treating me like a kid, trying to control my every moment so I would become more Dutch. They made me do my Dutch homework downstairs while my MIL would sit next to me and watch so she could see everything I was doing and correct my mistakes. They banned English in the house, and insisted we had to watch TV with them every night, but we had to watch Dutch programs that they chose, and my husband wasn't allowed to translate for me. It was seriously like being a little kid. I had no freedom. I wasn't allowed to just go out, or read a book, or watch a tv program. It all had to be okayed by them. I was 25, married, my mom had just died, and I had left my country and everything I owned to move there for their son, and I was treated like a child.

I was miserable. I told my husband I was giving it 6 more months and if we didn't have our own place, we were moving back to the US, because I wasn't living with his parents where we couldn't be an independent married couple. Fortunately we got our house, but then they tried to control what we did with it. She told me she didn't like my wallpaper, she was going to take it down and go pick something out for us. I put my foot down and said no, she wouldn't, because it wasn't her home, it was mine, and she didn't HAVE to like the wallpaper. -I- had to like the wallpaper. I think she was trying to kind of test me, because she made a comment when I first got to the Netherlands about how she was the number one woman in her son's life. She had loved him first. And I told her that he had CHOSEN me...I was his number one now. I think sometimes she did things just to try and make him choose sides to prove he loved her more. It didn't work, but she did try to manipulate him...like we chose a paint color, she offered to drive him to the store to get it, but then tried to get him to buy a different color. Actually she DID get him to buy the other color, and then when he brought it home, I made him take it back because it was the color I told him I absolutely did not want, BEFORE they went out. I HATE yellow paint on walls. It makes me think of urine. And he knew that, SHE knew that (our room in their house had yellow walls), and she knew we had chosen a paint that was more off white, and she got him to buy the one that was more yellow. So he had to go back again. I don't think he realized she was manipulating him on purpose, but at least he did agree that it wasn't cool of him to change what we had agreed on because his mother liked something else.

 

[Songbird76]

Hello-

I did my YouTube workout this morning. I did skip a few ads this AM, since I had some things I needed to get done this morning. It's weird, because some days will have a reasonable amount of ads and others are just ad after ad. What doesn't help is that this is a four week program, so she has you string together 2-3 workout videos a day, so you get a ton of ads each time you start a new video.

We're not getting our new furnace until next Friday. I am low key looking forward to that.

I started a loaf of sourdough bread this AM. This is a new method I am trying, so I am going to see if it's any better than the one I've been using. This method is little less hands on and doesn't require as much baby sitting. Also, I am proud to announce that I am taking it to the next level with my sourdough starter--the one I have lovingly fed and nurtured since the beginning of the year. I have given him the name "Mr. Mojo."

I watched the series, "The Right Stuff" on Disney+/NatGeo and I got sucked into other NatGeo programs about the Mercury and Apollo missions. "The Right Stuff" was OK, but it was entertaining. It was a like a soap opera that focused on the competition between Alan Shepard and John Glenn. It was not what I recall old school National Geographic shows were like.

I haven't seen that one, but I love documentaries and such. I watch a lot of Egyptology stuff, and archealogy programs. Sometimes I think I picked the wrong career....I should have become an anthropologist, or archealogist. I love learning about people and cultures.

 

[Songbird76]

No working out today...in fact, we ate all of the stuff today too! Donuts and Mexican food! Not all at the same time

I called the dealer yesterday for a status on my VW and they still haven't gotten back with me. It's been about 1.5 weeks since I've heard from them, and I'm the one doing all of the contacting of late. Today marks the 24th day they've had my vehicle with this most recent A/C outage, and the 53rd day it's been in the shop altogether since it was purchased a year ago. You've seen me discussing various makes and models. I have spent the last week looking at things on the road and doing some digging into reviews to help narrow the field. I have to like it both inside and out and not feel like I'm buying into another lemon. I also need to feel like it's suitable for our road trip and softball needs, while not feeling like a beast either. After narrowing things down based on that, I took a vacation day today and we tested the Telluride, the CX-9, the Palisade, and the Explorer. If I can get VW to lemon the Atlas and do a repurchase rather than replacement, we'll be looking to get the Palisade. It's spring break here this week, and both girls were along for the rides to caste their votes. It's unanimous.

I hope they'll go for the repurchase!! You've dealt with enough in the last few months...I think it's time something went your way!

 

[MinnieM123]

With some of my tax refund money, I indulged and bought two pair of hiking shoes (not boots -- these are regular ankle cut, but with really good lug soles for uneven terrain). About 5 days a week, I'm hiking through back woods trails, and I've had sturdy sneakers, but some of the terrain really calls for better soles. (To be clear, this is not any sort of technical hiking or climbing -- these are less difficult trails.)

Ordered two different brands to try, and one was much more comfy, and at about $50 cheaper that the more expensive brand (returning the more expensive ones). Liked it so much that I ordered another pair in a different color -- a gal has to have some variety, you know?!

 

[Figgy1]

Good morning I got my steps in and my bounce on. Seeing it's yucky yet again I'm going to have a long talk with mount laundry that may last all day

 

[Songbird76]

With some of my tax refund money, I indulged and bought two pair of hiking shoes (not boots -- these are regular ankle cut, but with really good lug soles for uneven terrain). About 5 days a week, I'm hiking through back woods trails, and I've had sturdy sneakers, but some of the terrain really calls for better soles. (To be clear, this is not any sort of technical hiking or climbing -- these are less difficult trails.)

Ordered two different brands to try, and one was much more comfy, and at about $50 cheaper that the more expensive brand (returning the more expensive ones). Liked it so much that I ordered another pair in a different color -- a gal has to have some variety, you know?!

I ordered two pairs of tennis shoes for work online since all the stores were closed. I hate buying shoes online....you really have to try them on to see how they feel. Neither were good, so now that the stores are open for appointments, I went on Monday morning, returned the two I bought online, and found two that I like much better and still got 80 euros back! Much better!!

 

[MinnieM123]

I ordered two pairs of tennis shoes for work online since all the stores were closed. I hate buying shoes online....you really have to try them on to see how they feel. Neither were good, so now that the stores are open for appointments, I went on Monday morning, returned the two I bought online, and found two that I like much better and still got 80 euros back! Much better!!

Glad to read that it turned out o.k., after your first experience. Note: I also hate buying shoes online, as it frustrates me to no end, that the exact same size in different brands -- fit differently. Why is that?!

 

[ajrwdwgirl]

Well she never came right out and said in so many words that I didn't deserve to have those things, but just the fact that when I said "Why can't I? I've figured out how it will all work, and it's our house. Why can't I have it? " and she said "I didn't have all that in MY first house!" The implication is that I should have to struggle first and didn't deserve to have everything right off the bat. Which actually is stupid, because it WASN'T our first home and we didn't have all that in our first home. We lived in the US for a year, in an apartment. We didn't have laundry facilities, we didn't have a dishwasher, and we only had one toilet. When we moved to the Nethlerlands, we couldn't even find affordable housing and we lived with them for three years, where I had NOTHING of my own. I wasn't even allowed to use MY furniture or redecorate....3 years of someone else telling me when I was allowed to go upstairs to my bedroom or when I had to stay downstairs and watch TV programs I hated and/didn't understand, 3 years where I wasn't allowed to speak English when I was with them, even though I didn't really speak Dutch well. 3 years of being told I couldn't go out that night because they needed us to do something for them. We weren't treated as adults there...we would get ready to go out and they'd tell us we couldn't because we needed to clean the bathroom or they needed someone to be home to give the school keys (my FIL was the keeper of the keys for the school) to the night school class and THEY had made plans to go out, so we had to cancel ours. 3 years of them telling me how I was allowed to spend our money or what I wasn't allowed to buy. I think what it really boiled down to was that they were trying to "re-raise" me, because I wasn't Dutch and didn't do things the "Dutch" way. So they were treating me like a kid, trying to control my every moment so I would become more Dutch. They made me do my Dutch homework downstairs while my MIL would sit next to me and watch so she could see everything I was doing and correct my mistakes. They banned English in the house, and insisted we had to watch TV with them every night, but we had to watch Dutch programs that they chose, and my husband wasn't allowed to translate for me. It was seriously like being a little kid. I had no freedom. I wasn't allowed to just go out, or read a book, or watch a tv program. It all had to be okayed by them. I was 25, married, my mom had just died, and I had left my country and everything I owned to move there for their son, and I was treated like a child.

I was miserable. I told my husband I was giving it 6 more months and if we didn't have our own place, we were moving back to the US, because I wasn't living with his parents where we couldn't be an independent married couple. Fortunately we got our house, but then they tried to control what we did with it. She told me she didn't like my wallpaper, she was going to take it down and go pick something out for us. I put my foot down and said no, she wouldn't, because it wasn't her home, it was mine, and she didn't HAVE to like the wallpaper. -I- had to like the wallpaper. I think she was trying to kind of test me, because she made a comment when I first got to the Netherlands about how she was the number one woman in her son's life. She had loved him first. And I told her that he had CHOSEN me...I was his number one now. I think sometimes she did things just to try and make him choose sides to prove he loved her more. It didn't work, but she did try to manipulate him...like we chose a paint color, she offered to drive him to the store to get it, but then tried to get him to buy a different color. Actually she DID get him to buy the other color, and then when he brought it home, I made him take it back because it was the color I told him I absolutely did not want, BEFORE they went out. I HATE yellow paint on walls. It makes me think of urine. And he knew that, SHE knew that (our room in their house had yellow walls), and she knew we had chosen a paint that was more off white, and she got him to buy the one that was more yellow. So he had to go back again. I don't think he realized she was manipulating him on purpose, but at least he did agree that it wasn't cool of him to change what we had agreed on because his mother liked something else.

i can’t believe you last three years like that. That’s a lot more patience than I could have summed up.

 

[Songbird76]

i can’t believe you last three years like that. That’s a lot more patience than I could have summed up.

I didn't really have much of a choice. He hadn't been able to find a job in the US besides stocking shelves at Walmart...he's an engineer with a masters degree. So we moved back here for him to be able to work, but they had just switched to the Euro and the economy was awful. The Euro was worth twice what the Gilder was, but companies converted salaries from Gilders to Euros, but stores just changed the signs, so everything cost twice as much as it had. He had a good job with above average pay and we still didn't qualify for a mortgage. My in-laws were ok, because their house was provided by the school as part of my FIL's salary. But we went to every bank and every real estate company....we couldn't buy, and renting was astronomically expensive and we wouldn't be able to save anything toward buying...so we lived with them until our lot was drawn on a cheaper housing website.

 

[Sans Souci]

With some of my tax refund money, I indulged and bought two pair of hiking shoes (not boots -- these are regular ankle cut, but with really good lug soles for uneven terrain). About 5 days a week, I'm hiking through back woods trails, and I've had sturdy sneakers, but some of the terrain really calls for better soles. (To be clear, this is not any sort of technical hiking or climbing -- these are less difficult trails.)

Ordered two different brands to try, and one was much more comfy, and at about $50 cheaper that the more expensive brand (returning the more expensive ones). Liked it so much that I ordered another pair in a different color -- a gal has to have some variety, you know?!

That's the best when the shoes that are better are the cheaper of the two. I will also buy 2 different colors of the same shoe if I really like them. Sometimes they discontinue them, so if I really love them, I buy a couple of pairs.

 

[Sans Souci]

No working out today...in fact, we ate all of the stuff today too! Donuts and Mexican food! Not all at the same time

I called the dealer yesterday for a status on my VW and they still haven't gotten back with me. It's been about 1.5 weeks since I've heard from them, and I'm the one doing all of the contacting of late. Today marks the 24th day they've had my vehicle with this most recent A/C outage, and the 53rd day it's been in the shop altogether since it was purchased a year ago. You've seen me discussing various makes and models. I have spent the last week looking at things on the road and doing some digging into reviews to help narrow the field. I have to like it both inside and out and not feel like I'm buying into another lemon. I also need to feel like it's suitable for our road trip and softball needs, while not feeling like a beast either. After narrowing things down based on that, I took a vacation day today and we tested the Telluride, the CX-9, the Palisade, and the Explorer. If I can get VW to lemon the Atlas and do a repurchase rather than replacement, we'll be looking to get the Palisade. It's spring break here this week, and both girls were along for the rides to caste their votes. It's unanimous.

I hope this goes off without a hitch for you. Between this car issue and that troubled girl, it seems like one thing should go in your favor. What a headache.

 

[Sans Souci]

Well she never came right out and said in so many words that I didn't deserve to have those things, but just the fact that when I said "Why can't I? I've figured out how it will all work, and it's our house. Why can't I have it? " and she said "I didn't have all that in MY first house!" The implication is that I should have to struggle first and didn't deserve to have everything right off the bat. Which actually is stupid, because it WASN'T our first home and we didn't have all that in our first home. We lived in the US for a year, in an apartment. We didn't have laundry facilities, we didn't have a dishwasher, and we only had one toilet. When we moved to the Nethlerlands, we couldn't even find affordable housing and we lived with them for three years, where I had NOTHING of my own. I wasn't even allowed to use MY furniture or redecorate....3 years of someone else telling me when I was allowed to go upstairs to my bedroom or when I had to stay downstairs and watch TV programs I hated and/didn't understand, 3 years where I wasn't allowed to speak English when I was with them, even though I didn't really speak Dutch well. 3 years of being told I couldn't go out that night because they needed us to do something for them. We weren't treated as adults there...we would get ready to go out and they'd tell us we couldn't because we needed to clean the bathroom or they needed someone to be home to give the school keys (my FIL was the keeper of the keys for the school) to the night school class and THEY had made plans to go out, so we had to cancel ours. 3 years of them telling me how I was allowed to spend our money or what I wasn't allowed to buy. I think what it really boiled down to was that they were trying to "re-raise" me, because I wasn't Dutch and didn't do things the "Dutch" way. So they were treating me like a kid, trying to control my every moment so I would become more Dutch. They made me do my Dutch homework downstairs while my MIL would sit next to me and watch so she could see everything I was doing and correct my mistakes. They banned English in the house, and insisted we had to watch TV with them every night, but we had to watch Dutch programs that they chose, and my husband wasn't allowed to translate for me. It was seriously like being a little kid. I had no freedom. I wasn't allowed to just go out, or read a book, or watch a tv program. It all had to be okayed by them. I was 25, married, my mom had just died, and I had left my country and everything I owned to move there for their son, and I was treated like a child.

I was miserable. I told my husband I was giving it 6 more months and if we didn't have our own place, we were moving back to the US, because I wasn't living with his parents where we couldn't be an independent married couple. Fortunately we got our house, but then they tried to control what we did with it. She told me she didn't like my wallpaper, she was going to take it down and go pick something out for us. I put my foot down and said no, she wouldn't, because it wasn't her home, it was mine, and she didn't HAVE to like the wallpaper. -I- had to like the wallpaper. I think she was trying to kind of test me, because she made a comment when I first got to the Netherlands about how she was the number one woman in her son's life. She had loved him first. And I told her that he had CHOSEN me...I was his number one now. I think sometimes she did things just to try and make him choose sides to prove he loved her more. It didn't work, but she did try to manipulate him...like we chose a paint color, she offered to drive him to the store to get it, but then tried to get him to buy a different color. Actually she DID get him to buy the other color, and then when he brought it home, I made him take it back because it was the color I told him I absolutely did not want, BEFORE they went out. I HATE yellow paint on walls. It makes me think of urine. And he knew that, SHE knew that (our room in their house had yellow walls), and she knew we had chosen a paint that was more off white, and she got him to buy the one that was more yellow. So he had to go back again. I don't think he realized she was manipulating him on purpose, but at least he did agree that it wasn't cool of him to change what we had agreed on because his mother liked something else.

You have the patience of a saint! There is no way I could tolerate that for three years! I am more of the slow burn type, but I think I would have eventually blown up into a mushroom cloud and came back to the US. She was controlling nearly every aspect of your life!

The comment about her being the number one woman in her son's life is straight up skeevy. I can't see myself ever saying that about my son. That is such a weird sentiment.

The worst thing I can say about my MIL is she talks non-stop and she sometimes talks over me. It does irritate me, because I am an introvert and I am not someone who talks a lot. It frustrates me that I am not being heard. I give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she is just a very social person. But sometimes I will start talking about something and she's not interested, so she will say, "Hmm. OK." and then start discussing what interests her.

It's not just me who thinks she talks a lot. My MIL and SIL came to visit us once and when they got on the plane to fly back to the UK, my SIL asked my MIL not to talk so much. MIL kept talking, I guess, because my SIL pulled a hat over her face and said "I asked you not to talk too much." She kept the hat over her face for the entire flight. I don't think my MIL was too happy, because she told my husband about it when she got home.

 

[Sans Souci]

I haven't seen that one, but I love documentaries and such. I watch a lot of Egyptology stuff, and archealogy programs. Sometimes I think I picked the wrong career....I should have become an anthropologist, or archealogist. I love learning about people and cultures.

Maybe it's me, but these newer documentaries seem to be different than the NatGeo stuff that used to air on PBS. Maybe it's because they have ads now. I don't know.

 

[Sans Souci]

Yeah, what I'm seeing seems to go beyond your run of the mill teen drama. It reminds me of cases I read about in my psychology courses and things detailed in the DSM. Considering everything else she's said that's been crazy, we're sort of bracing ourselves for potential lies about us as well. The kids go back to school on Monday and we'll see what the school admin says/does. We both discussed the free legal services our employers offer us if needed. The mere fact that there's an element of cyberbullying was what got this conversation started, but if she's going to spread around that her father used to molest her, what might she say about us?

While the girl is in therapy and is supposedly on some meds, whatever they're doing doesn't seem to be helping. I hadn't considered that the therapist might be validating the behavior and exacerbating things, but that's entirely possible. Either way, we're really going to have to keep a close eye on things.

Definitely keep your ear to the ground. She is likely to be covert with any sort of smear campaign now, because she knows you have her number.

 

[Sans Souci]

Hello-

Just checking in with day 13 of my four week YouTube schedule. I kind of want to go back to yoga, but I think I will have to wait until we get our new furnace. I like the room to be warm before doing yoga and it was cooooollllllldddd where I workout this AM. I am worried about injuring myself if I am not warm enough, especially since I work out straight out of bed.

I have bread doing it's final rise before putting it in the oven. I have to turn my oven on at 500 F for an hour before I bake it, so that will heat up the house a bit. It's sunny today, that will help heat up the house, too.

We're supposed to go to DC next Friday. I am still on the fence. The only thing I am worried about is the hotel room. We decided we will go to the National Arboretum and Mount Vernon, if we go. They are both outdoor activities. We have restaurant reservations that are outdoor seating, but depending on the weather, we might get delivery if it's too chilly. I'll think about it. My husband gets his second shot tomorrow, so he'll probably be more confident than I am about going.