Unnecessary harsh treatment of children in public spaces at WDW

BoarderPhreak

Well-Known Member
Back in "the old days" you knew to behave or you'd get a swift backhand or the nearest ashtray upside the head.

Today we're negotiating with kids to think about feelings and how they've misbehaved; laying out a framework to improve the stated issues with a follow-up to see if the goals were met "back at the hotel." Sanctions may be utilized to ensure compliance.

Somewhere in between is the answer. 😆
 

Mr Ferret 88

instagram mrferret888
Premium Member
Back in "the old days" you knew to behave or you'd get a swift backhand or the nearest ashtray upside the head.

Today we're negotiating with kids to think about feelings and how they've misbehaved; laying out a framework to improve the stated issues with a follow-up to see if the goals were met "back at the hotel." Sanctions may be utilized to ensure compliance.

Somewhere in between is the answer. 😆
Thank the lord my parents never smoked 😉
 

SteamboatJoe

Well-Known Member
I am a parent and was raised by boomer parents that did not treat me like a snowflake. I am a middle child of 4.

In most situations it is definitely possible to properly discipline your children in public without making a huge scene of it (assuming it's not a life/death situation). Being hot and tired, while relatable, is never an acceptable excuse for poor, uncalled behavior by an adult. How to behave in public is a ongoing education that should start long before making a trip to WDW.

That said....parents are human. We make mistakes. And kids really can be irrational and unreasonable. It isn't entirely fair to judge a person or situation by a few seconds of observation.

Finally, I have no problem with childless individuals forming child raising opinions, philosophies, and theories via observation.....privately. The only time it would ever be proper to publicly interject yourself into another family's affairs is when there is legitimate abuse occurring or a life/death situation exists.
 

jloucks

Well-Known Member
...is when there is legitimate abuse occurring...
Yea, but who defines legitimate? Also begs the question what is illegitimate abuse?

I would say that anytime you are not coaching, you are abusing. This includes shaming behaviors.

I'm no saint, I spanked my kids (about 3 times total between the 2 of them), and mastered the stealth pinch, but I do think too many parents take it too far with kids. I am not sold kids need "whippins" to grow up well adjusted. I think it actually doesn't help their adjustment.
 

bigrigross

Well-Known Member
So you're talking about most of the posters in this thread's parents - including your own?- being awful people. Awful humans. Okay then.
I was taught well by my uncles and grandfather. My direct parents were terrible parents which is why I was raised by my grandparents. But if people want to make blanket statements about millennials, then I have no issues making blanket statements about boomers.
 

dryerlintfan

Well-Known Member
I just did my best, so I can imagine it's the same with parents.
I think this is important to the conversation. We're all just doing the best we can. Kids are hard. Even good kids are hard. Sweet kids are hard. Empathetic kids are hard. Kids cannot act with the emotional maturity of an adult. It's not in their skill set yet. And that makes them really hard.

We're all just doing the best we can. Some days that's good enough. Some days that's not. But it's the only play in the play book: parenting is hard and unpredictable so just do the best you can.
 

phillip9698

Well-Known Member
If only children reduced misbehavior to moments inside of hotel rooms and in the car. That way nobody would have to witness the tantrum and the punishment. If you think you feel bad seeing the child and the parent that way in public think about how embarrassed the parent is, they are the one congnizant that everyone is looking, not the child. Of course im not talking about public beatings here.
 

KrzyKtty

Well-Known Member
I think a lot of people are forgetting that a lot of parents of young children, who are the most likley to act out, are virtually babies themselves. I had my 1st child when I was 23, most of my friends did as well. I was an entirely different parent then than I am now more than a decade later. Young parents are not perfect; older parents aren't perfect. I have blown up at my kids in public at times, and gotten weird looks for it. What most of those people didn't see was that later on when I had time to cool down I apologized to my children for how I acted, and then explained to them what they did wrong.

However, if you are only judging me on the 5 seconds you witnessed at my worst, you are not really getting the whole picture.

At the end of it all though, I am 1/2 Italian and 1/2 Irish. Both sides of my family fit every stereotype you will ever think of. Most of the the time my children know not to screw with mama if they expect to keep their heads firmly planted on their bodies lol.
 

Smiley/OCD

Well-Known Member
I too worked in retail management for 30+ years...all I can say with certainty is if I EVER acted like many of the kids I've witnessed in a store (or a park, etc.) at 55, I'd still be picking the shoelaces of my late dad's size 12 shoes out of my butt...sometimes that's the only way. ONCE. You learn your lesson on what's to come and yes, you do remember (even at an early age). I'm proud to say there are no remnants of shoelaces on by person except my shoes. I'm absolutely NO expert on raising children, but my 2 DD's now 19 and 21 were taught from the beginning proper manners and behaviors. My wife and I feel blessed that they learned from their mistakes, are NOT entitled and have become VERY GOOD adult women. I think the parameters we and their grandparents set for them worked very well. Oh, and by the way, with my late mom...it was just "THE LOOK"...witness it once, and the problem was solved. There were no time outs for my brother and me.
 
Top Bottom