Do you even know what I was addressing??Let's refresh what I call absurd.
Another poster gave us this:
""Well, it’s like criticizing someone’s driving when you’ve never driven before""
If someone is driving under the influence of drugs or endangering others by the way he drives then anybody witnessing such danger has standing to criticize ---yes, anyone even those without a driving license.
Yes anyone who witnesses something is considered an outsider into a situation therefore their view is perceived differently so saying it is absurd is not true either in this case as it depends on the situation because if we are talking about parents that are going extreme on their kids that is when I think the driving reference implies example: beating/child abuse so it really depends and goes back to the initial intent of the person writing the question discussion topic in the first place. the quote you were referencing that was originally listed showed something different when I viewed it which made it seem you were saying that people with kids are indeed going to extreme on their kids on purpose. My question for the original poster is the intention of the post what to the original poster is considered extreme?
Nicely said agree with youI was with you until the last paragraph. It is way over stated that negative will cause major problem later in life. All of this, either positive or negative will have future problems if overdone and not with the judgment it takes to decide which one is the most effective at the moment of need. My generation was given "positive" rewards for doing things that were expected of us. We didn't get participation trophies. We earned our rewards and our less then ideal negativity. I know that my kids did well and were always well behaved (at least after the first time they met with negative the first time they misbehaved). I'm not talking about beating a child physically, (btw, a slap on the butt is not the same as beating) but setting out what is expected of them and they will do what is necessary to get the positive reinforcement.
However, like adults, each child is different in personalities. I have a grandson who when he was little you could actually see his mind working as he decided what was worth the punishment and what wasn't. Since he was not my problem I found it comical. The kid is still quick witted and will test at every inch of the way. He is 18 now and still has a personality that is intriguing. He will take chances if he thinks it will be alright, but he also is one of kindest, sincerely sympathetic young men I have ever known. He never fails to make me laugh. What a piece of work. He cares about his parents, wants to make them proud, but if he thinks he is right about something he can be like a giant tree and is unmovable. His lifetime has been a constant exposure of negative from his Dad, especially when it came to sports. But, over the years he has developed a "water off a ducks back" attitude who knew he was pretty talented, and his Dad was just a perfectionist when it came to that stuff. With that, because it was extreme and long lived his dad will suffer a detachment because he no longer is willing to accept the negative. That is the payback that bad parents get. Sad, but understandable, but still only if it is extreme. Negative reinforcement in an isolated situation like visiting a theme park is not something that will carry over to adulthood. Over reaction to that will usually result in under reaction when it is to the benefit of all those involved.