I'm sorry this had to come late. I had a few bugs with my computer as I was adding the finishing touches.
Welcome to Dr. Newton's Time Travels!
Upon entering the line for what used to be Stitch's Great Escape, you notice that the TV monitors in the queue haves been changed to broadcast images of previous trips*, ranging from Baroque Austria to Paris in 2089. After watching the video loop on the minter several times, a Cast Member tells us it's time to come in.
On the walls on the queue are times that seemed to have converged in this room from across millennia**. You spot what could be old Roman uniforms, a dusty jukebox, and, hanging from the ceiling, a personal spaceship or two. Across a railing, you see a laboratory-like area with blueprints scattered about. It's quite cluttered. There are strange, bizarre gadgets and widgets on the workbenches and on the floor. The lights are dim, aside from a lone lightbulb dangling from the ceiling. In the approximate center of the area is a humanoid robot***. On the left side of the laboratory is a large, cylindrical capsule with a teddy bear inside****. Beside the tube, to the right, is a video screen.
The lights brighten up, and the show begins. The robot introduces itself as A.I.D.E, "or as my folks back at the factory call me, the Assistant In Data Exploration."
AIDE: You're all probably wondering why we've assembled you here today. Well, earthlings, today's your lucky day! You,re about to partake in what is possibly the most important scientific demonstration in millennia! My most ingenious boss, Dr. Barnabas Newton, is working out the finishing touches in his brand-new revolutionary time machine. It can bring you anytime from a few seconds into the future to a few centuries. However, to experience time travel, you cannot eat, drink. smoke, or take flash photography. It reverses the polarity and that certainly won't end well for any of us. Now, it appears Dr. Newton is ready. I hope he's ready; I'm just too hoppin' excited to test this out!
The video screen turns on, and Dr. Newton appears. From the looks of it, he certainly knows how to put himself together. The man is tall and quite slim. His thick brown sideburns accentuate his cheeks and Fu Manchu mustache. His outfit certainly invokes an academic or scientific vibe, with the lab coat, bowtie, and suspenders. He seems to be in his late 30s or early 40s. The man's energy certainly conveys it, as he is delighted to see us.
DR. NEWTON: Alright! They've come! Hello, fellow humans. A.I.D.E. probably introduced me, but if he didn't, I'm Dr. Newton, and welcome to my lab! I've been working for years on an extraordinary machine, one that could potentially change human ingenuity forever! Behold the Time Machine!
The tube lights up, giving us a better view of the teddy bear.
DR. NEWTON: In that tube is my little buddy Bob. Why's he called Bob? I don't know. He just is. Anyways, when I flip the switch, Bob will be transported fifteen seconds into the future. Impressive, huh? It certainly is, I'll tell you that! I've been waiting for this moment since my college days! Boy, do I miss them.
AIDE: Um...Doc? You're not going off on one of those tangents about college, are you?
DR. NEWTON: Oh...no. (he chuckles a bit) As I was saying, prepare for transport in five...four...three...two...one!
The tube lights up in multiple colors and there is a quick smoke effect. The bear has disappeared. There is silence for a bit, but in fifteen seconds, you see and hear electricity going through the tube and the teddy bear reappearing.
DR. NEWTON: It...it worked! It worked! A.I.D.E., it worked! We did it! We did it! Ha-ha-ha!
The doctor does a bit of a celebratory jig. A.I.D.E. joins in.
AIDE: We've done it, Doc! We have truly seized the future! (turns to the audience) Well, earthlings, we know our machine works. If it can transport one thing, it can transport many. To get you ready, one of our lab assistants will direct you to the time machine for our main event. See you there!
We are directed by the lab assistant (Cast Member) into the time machine and get in our seats. In the center is the control center, manned by Audio-Animatronics of Dr. Newton and A.I.D.E. Above us is a domed screen (it covers the ceiling and the upper half of the wall) which currently shows the sky*****. After everyone is settled in, our lab assistant gives us the "please remain seated" spiel and the show begins.
DR. NEWTON: Are the coordinates locked, A.I.D.E.?
AIDE: Coordinates locked.
DR. NEWTON: Engines ready?
AIDE: Engines ready.
DR. NEWTON: Thrusters in place?
AIDE: Thrusters ready to go!
DR. NEWTON: Prepare for transport in ten...nine...eight...seven...six...five...four...three...two...one!
Out the domed ceilings, we see clouds zoom by. The scenery quickly changes to a Twilight Zone-like atmosphere. Random shapes and blobs float about in the endless pace. Retro sci-fi style music is heard as we traverse this barren landscape.
DR. NEWTON: All systems go for landing.
AIDE: Commence landing procedures.
This is where things start to diverge. Like the new Star Tours, every experience is different. In no particular order, you will experience four of these possible scenarios in your time travel adventure:
1. You arrive in a prehistoric jungle. It's quite warm and humid. You see various dinosaurs walking around in the distance. The ground starts to shake. You hear big steps being taken towards he time machine. There's a loud crash, and above the wreckage you see a menacing tyrannosaurus rex, ready to chomp at anything that moves.
AIDE: I don't want to be an early dinner! Let's get out of here!
DR. NEWTON: Commence transport procedures.
2. You arrive in the middle of a hot, dry desert. Looming int the distance are two great pyramids of immense size. In a scene reminiscent of The Ten Commandments, an Egyptian army is riding through the desert towards you.
DR. NEWTON: Ah, yes! Ancient Egypt! Land of the pyramids and empire of the Nile!
AIDE: It sure does go on for niles and niles.
DR. NEWTON: It certainly does. You know, I think this is where my mummy came from.
AIDE: Oh dear...that's for another time! Ha-ha!
3. The time machine appears in a large arena with cheering crowds. You can tell this this is an event of prestige and great importance. You soon hear an unfamiliar voice.
AIDE: I hope this is isn't what I think it is...
ANNOUNCER: The brave and noble man has arrived! Please welcome Maximus the Great!
The crowd cheers. A rather fit man enters the stadium in full gladiator regalia.
ANNOUNCER: Death to the Metal Beast!
DR. NEWTON: Looks like we won't be staying for long.
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
4. You arrive on the deck of a pirates' galleon. The crew were enjoying a few sea shanties when you showed up, so they're obviously hoppin' mad.
PIRATE 1: Get that landlubber!
PIRATE 2: Yar! Make him walk the plank!
AIDE: Oh...I don't have a very good feeling about this!
PIRATE 1: Send him to Davey Jones' Locker!
DR. NEWTON: It's definitely not a pirate's life for us. Let's get out of here!
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
5. You appear in what seems to be an extravagant European palace. A crowd of people are surrounding a young boy playing the piano. We close in on the boy, be he notices us and starts to follow us.
AIDE: Oh dear! Oh dear! Oh dear! This is not good! I repeat; this is not good!
AUSTRIAN MAN: What are you doing with Wolfgang!?
DR. NEWTON: No worries, mate. Commence transport procedures.
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
6. The time machine arrives on a busy metropolitan street. Horse-and-buggies are passing to and fro. The sounds of church bells can be heard off in the distance.
AIDE: Quick! Act natural! (casually whistles)
DR. NEWTON: I'm pretty sure these people will still find a giant metal object traveling through the streets of London to be just a bit unnatural, don't you think?
AIDE: Sheesh, at least I'm trying! Hey, we should leave before the authorities send us to Botany Bay.
DR. NEWTON: Commence transport procedures.
7. We land on a farm somewhere in the northeastern United States. There is a man in a blue uniform laying next to us with a rifle. Cannons on the other side of the field fire off in the distance. There's another man screaming in agony.
AIDE: What's going on, Doc? I don't think I can handle it!
DR. NEWTON: It's the American Civil War, A.I.D.E. Brother against brother. What a horrible time.
AIDE: Then why are we staying here! Let's leave before we get caught in the crossfire!
DR. NEWTON: Commence transport procedures.
8. The scenery changes to a quintessential Wild West town. Cowboys and Indians abound.
DR. NEWTON: I've always wanted to visit the Wild West! The big, wide, open frontier is just so exciting.
An outlaw busts out of the bank and hops on his horse. The sheriff quickly runs after him. Gunfire is exchanged.
AIDE: Why do we always get stuck in these situations?
DR. NEWTON: Don't worry, A.I.D.E. I know just what to do!
Dr. Newton proceeds to pilot the time machine to knock the outlaw off his horse. The sheriff then comes and arrests the outlaw.
DR. NEWTON: Howdy, partner!
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
9. We arrive at the 1889 Paris Exposition. People from all over the world have convened in Paris to showcase their countries' technological marvels. Among the most notable is the famed steel Eiffel Tower dominating the Parisian skyline.
DR. NEWTON: A.I.D.E., this is something I've wanted to see my whole life, the Exposition Universelle de Paris, Mille Neuf Cents.
AIDE: Speak English!
DR. NEWTON: The Universal Exposition in Paris, 1889. It was when the Eiffel Tower was first built. In fact, we're about to meet some of my heroes, Jules Verne and H.G. Wells.
AIDE: So, where are they?
DR. NEWTON: Yes...that's them! AIDE, keep your cool.
AIDE: Doc, I think one of them's got me...
Jules Verne is seen hanging on to AIDE as he ascends back to the machine.
DR. NEWTON: Uh, uh...commence transport procedures.
10. We land on a sandy beach where we see two men with an odd flying contraption.
AIDE: Did we book an impromptu R&R trip, Doc?
DR. NEWTON: No, A.I.D.E., we're at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina, where the Wright Brothers are testing their airplane.
AIDE: What's so special about a bunch of wood and cloth?
DR. NEWTON: Can't you see? All of aviation lends itself to these two. Without them, we'd be stuck on the ground!
AIDE: Well, I'll least watch them fly.
The Wright plane takes off and circles about.
DR. NEWTON: Isn't it breathtaking, watching a world-changing event right before your eyes?
AIDE: Yeah, yeah. Commence transport procedures.
11. It's New York, the city that never sleeps, at the height of the Roaring 20s. Night has fallen and a street party in Times Square has commenced. Swing and jazz music fill the air.
AIDE: Aw, Doc, I knew you were a party animal!
DR. NEWTON: I guess I am, A.I.D.E. But that's not why we're here. This is New York City at the height of the Roaring 20s. America's never been richer.
AIDE: Can't we go to a party anytime?
DR. NEWTON: Maybe we can, but this is no ordinary party. Everything's bigger, bolder, and grander! It's a time for social change and cultural revolution!
The crescendo of Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin is heard, as fireworks fill the Manhattan sky.
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
12. We land outside a high school in the 1950s. Hound Dog by Elvis Presley plays in the background s the students are let out of school for the day.
AIDE: Aren't all these people on vacation, Doc? Why are taking them back to school?
DR. NEWTON: No, A.I.D.E., they're not going back to school early. We're just here to show them the freedom our youth gained in this marvelous time. Diners, rock & roll, bowling, muscle cars. You name it, they had it!
AIDE: Time travel, perhaps?
DR. NEWTON: Well, no, but...you get the idea!
AIDE: I got you there, Doc.
DR. NEWTON: Yeah, you did. Let's go!
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
13. We arrive in suburban America in the 1980s. Stereotypical 80s techno music is heard.
AIDE: Why's everyone dressed so funny?
DR. NEWTON: This is the 1980s, A.I.D.E. It was a radical decade of Live and Let Live.
AIDE: That sounds like my kind of time! Can I stay? Please, please, please?
DR. NEWTON: No, you have a job to do.
AIDE: Aw shucks!
DR. NEWTON: Anyways, the 1980s brought about many cultural and technological revolutions, like commercial video games, computer animation, heavy metal, big hair. This decade had it all! In fact, the 1980s are my favorite decade of the 20th century.
AIDE: Looking around here, I can see why, Doc.
DR. NEWTON: Enough is enough. Let's go.
AIDE: Commence transport procedures.
14. We are transported to sunny Florida. The pleasant and soothing scent of oranges fill the room. Up ahead is a familiar castle. There's a parade going down Main Street, U.S.A.
AIDE: Where are we? In fact, when are we?
DR. NEWTON: I've come here to the year (insert current year) C.E. to investigate a supposed "magic kingdom" in the mysterious land of Florida.
AIDE: Floor-ee-da?
DR, NEWTON: Apparently so. That castle in the center looks to be the commercial and cultural center of this kingdom.
AIDE: Doc, what are all those people doing down there?
DR. NEWTON: I believe they're holding a procession in honor of the king with big ears******. It's a daily ritual here. It's quite festive, actually?
AIDE: Should we investigate?
DR. NEWTON: Probably not. We wouldn't want to intrude on their spiritual festivities.
AIDE: Alrighty then. Commence transport procedures.
15. It is now the far future, perhaps several generations ahead of our time. The landscape bears a great resemblance to the concept art for the abandoned Tomorrowland 2055 project at Disneyland. Elements of Star Wars and Wall-E can also be seen throughout.
DR. NEWTON: Behold, Tomorrowland 3000!
AIDE: I never thought I'd live long enough to see this.
DR. NEWTON: A.I.D.E., you're a robot. You'll never die.
AIDE: Oh yeah.
DR. NEWTON: As I was saying, this metropolitan empire before us is the absolute pinnacle of human civilization. What comes next, I'd rather not say.
AIDE: Why not, Doc?
DR. NEWTON: It's for the safety of our human passengers.
AIDE: Aw...that's a shame!
DR. NEWTON: I know, A.I.D.E., I know.
ANNOUNCER: Emergency! Emergency! All persons are to report to their meteor shelters! I repeat! All persons are to report to their meteor shelters!
A slew of meteors begins to fall upon Tomorrowland 3000. People are heard screaming, and fires start to sprout all around.
AIDE: Doc, we need to get out now!
DR. NEWTON: That's right! Commence transport procedures.
After the four scenes are done, this scene occurs.
DR. NEWTON: Well, I hope you enjoyed and appreciated our technological achievements here. It's been a great ride! I hope to see some of you back here again sometime, and have a great day in Tomorrowland!
AIDE: (impersonating Mickey Mouse) That's right! Have a magical day! Ha-ha!
DR. NEWTON: Quit it now.
AIDE: Sorry!
We are bow directed by a lab assistant to the exits, which lead to Merchant of Venus and Mickey's Star Traders. All Stitch merchandise here is removed in favor of generic Tomorrowland merchandise.
*mostly archived footage from The Timekeeper.
**former props from Horizons, World of Motion, Timekeeper, the Backlot Tour, etc.
***humanoid in the sense that it has a face and arms
****There's a Hidden Mickey on its tummy, similar to the marks you see on Care Bears.
*****The screen actually changes in real time, so the sky looks the same as it actually does outside.
******Take a guess as to who it is.