Well, at least DD is in 6th grade this year, so next year she's off to high school and that school will be a distant memory. DS is super happy in his new school and it's amazing. I was so tempted to pull DD out of the school and send her somewhere else, too, though she wouldn't qualify for DS's school, but she actually wanted to stay because of her friends, and I understand that. Plus, she's not bullied like he was. There are some little snots in her class, but they don't torment her like DS was tormented. How old is your oldest? I'm so sorry you've dealt with the bullying, too...it's been a very rough month for us because of it. We've been dealing with it for several years, but it escalated this year to the point that he wasn't safe in that school, so we pulled him out. We just got him into a special school this past week and things are so much better. But I hate to hear about anyone else going through what we have. DS is 9, in 5th grade and had stomach aches and nightmares every night and didn't want to go to school and would cry 2 days before he had to go back. It was awful and it was handled so badly by the school.
My oldest is 11 and in 6th grade now - new school, very supportive, and understanding that he basically went through hell in elementary school. We're still getting systems in place (he's in integrated classes), but the kids in his class like him and don't bother him, so so far, so good.
It REALLY helps that I'm finishing up my bachelors in Education, so I'm able to speak to the teachers, admins, etc. in their own language and that there's really no communication gap...which is sort of why I chose that as my second major to begin with. I will say that I don't get involved in ANY of the school activities anymore, and it's definitely had an effect on my kids' social lives, which really stinks, but I refuse to subject any of us to the snobbery that is so prevalent. (It was so bad at his old school that one kid was calling him names all day DURING class and the excuse "his teacher had a really difficult group of kids" was thrown at me. I don't care - that's unacceptable and the school has a zero tolerance policy that's worthless.)
My youngest is 6. He has a severe speech delay (he talks as if he's maybe 3-4-ish depending on the subject), but he understands everything you say to him. He's in a separate autism program and he ADORES school...to the point where I can use it to my advantage if he's being a skootch! He goes to the same school my oldest went to for elementary, but where he's in a separate program we haven't had any issues.
Honestly, we're in MA where we're supposed to have the "best" schools around, and I have yet to see evidence of that. Not to get political, but the extreme liberalism here is causing some things that I really have issue with and we're working towards moving to Florida. Tons of reasons for the decision, but Disney is definitely one of them as both my boys thrive there (and seem to make developmental leaps on every trip), and it's our family happy place.
I'm so happy you guys were able to find a great place for your son!!!
Honestly, I can make money from home, and my goal once I finish my degrees (English and Education, specialization in instructional design, and you can bet I have tons of life experience with special needs) is to parlay them into tutoring and using my other skills to earn enough so that I can home-school my oldest. He really, REALLY hates school and is a technological wiz-kid (like his mom, lol). That wouldn't happen until after we move, but we know enough people down in FL already that socializing really would be a non-issue. Up here we're out in the middle of nowhere and pretty much by ourselves.
Color me more than shocked. Now @MinnieM123 can try and figure out why I wanted a magnetic plate 
BUT!!! You my friend get a sympathy like you already have too much on your plate to make them.
