The Chit Chat Chit Chat Thread

[Gabe1]

well, she has the right to be with what she wants.
if Auntie wants to go heroically doing what she loves to do.. what other people can do?

Yeah, it is so hard. It happens all the time within families, what the loved one wants to do that is ill and what the family wants them to do. Sometimes the wishes are polar opposite. Never simple. Sucidoodles.

 

[donaldtoo]

Pass.

Non-pass...

 

[donaldtoo]

I'm seriously suffering Disney vacation deficiency.

There seems to be a lot a' that goin' around, lately.

 

[donaldtoo]

Thank you for sharing that. I don't know anyone with autism, so it's always good to have some knowledge about it, while keeping in mind your comment that it's also a complicated situation. Let's hope that researchers will unlock more of the mysteries. Your brother is blessed that he has such a loving and supportive family around him.

I know I've mentioned all this before, but, our super premie, formerly 1 lb. 4 oz., now 22 yr. old DS is on both the autism and Asperger's spectrums. Not as severe, and actually pretty mild compared to so many others. He absolutely loves animals, especially dogs. He can read like a maniac, but still has many problems with writing, and time and space issues. There are just so many different levels and variations for so many people with this affliction, and that's what makes it so difficult to nail down. Every case is unique in some small or large degree.
Truly a complex puzzle that can vary so much from individual to individual.

 

[donaldtoo]

I may have stirred the pot, sort of without meaning to. That's a big "sort of".
Missionary Auntie is still not back to fighting form, and had to go to town (Mwanza) to a clinic for more medical treatment. Her lung infection is finally cleared up (after 2 months), but she still can't breathe without her puffers every four hours, and is completely housebound. Kinda hard to feed village kids or preach out of town, when you are unable to leave your house.

Anyway, all of her email updates are very vague ... deliberately.
She did however, ask her daughter to get things all set up with a respiratory specialist for when she gets home in June. There is a marked difference between her x-rays of this week compared to those from 6 months ago.

Cuz gave me a call to get a little info. She couldn't remember the name of Auntie's condition (ideopathic pulmonary fibrosis). And then ... we got talking, and told her what I knew about it. The Boss' much older second husband died of the same disease in June of 2006. The Boss, as you may recall, is a close friend of 25+ years, so I was intimately involved with the process.
Like Auntie, Frank was asymptomatic for three years, he started to get ill in year four, and once he got legit sick, he was gone in six weeks.

Cuz got on the internet and learned that the average life expectancy after diagnosis was 5-7 years. Auntie was diagnosed in 2011. Cuz is now very concerned, and so she should be.

She is going to complete her internet investigations, carefully word an email to her mom, and insist she come home. For once, I'm on her side, rather than Auntie's.

Prayers.

 

[JenniferS]

well, she has the right to be with what she wants.
if Auntie wants to go heroically doing what she loves to do.. what other people can do?

Yes and no.

 

[Gabe1]

There seems to be a lot a' that goin' around, lately.

Soon we can live through @Cesar rm vicariously. If it isn't me it may as well be someone else!

 

[JenniferS]

a boot in the butt for son #1 might work

He says school is all he can handle.
Never mind that everyone I ever knew (or currently know) held some type of job simultaneously. Nobody is suggesting that he work 40 hours/week, but yikes! he should be able to work 5-10.

 

[Gabe1]

Yes and no.

Yep. Exactly what I spoke to. It is hard.

I watched it with my Gran. Her son (not my Dad) won. They did it his way. She lived longer for him, but she went through heck and back again and had a long slow painful 2 more years. She wanted to just live out the few months she had left doing what she wanted to and not go through years of pain. She did for him. It is such a hard call.

 

[Gabe1]

He says school is all he can handle.
Never mind that everyone I ever knew (or currently know) held some type of job simultaneously. Nobody is suggesting that he work 40 hours/week, but yikes! he should be able to work 5-10.

Yeah, my kids while away at college worked about 10 hours a week, pocket money is what it was.
In high school though they both worked about 20 hours a week. Especially since he is repeating you'd think he could do something. Still with all the issues he has had with education I'm not sure rocking his boat while he is actually doing high school again is worth the small amount of money with the big picture if the goal still is to go to University.

How was his first round of grades after returning? Is he still moving this weekend?

 

[donaldtoo]

Sweet Disney dreams, gang!
Laterrrrrrr...!!!

 

[JenniferS]

Yeah, it is so hard. It happens all the time within families, what the loved one wants to do that is ill and what the family wants them to do. Sometimes the wishes are polar opposite. Never simple. Sucidoodles.

If she dies in Africa, she will be buried there.

Right now, she is accomplishing very little, and only because she has two young people on their first mission trip staying with her. When Chloe and Sean leave in 6 weeks, she will be on her own.

The conditions in her village have seriously deteriorated in the past 6 months. Nobody has running water right now, and she has to pay someone to fetch her 3 jugs every day from the central depot.
She had an invasion of army ants (think IJ/Crystal Skull) and they had to pour kerosene all around the perimetre of the home, and set it ablaze. You know, 'cause burning kerosene is so good for the breathing-impaired.

Things just aren't going well this trip. Customs refuses to clear our food container. The longer they stall, the more food expires, the less likely it will ever be cleared!
It just may be God's way of telling her to turn the work over to a younger, more well-funded group. And maybe she just doesn't want to hear.

Not sure. Also, not my mother.
My mother, her sister, chose not to deal with her own serious medical condition, and died within 5 hours, at the ripe old age of 62.

 

[JenniferS]

Yeah, my kids while away at college worked about 10 hours a week, pocket money is what it was.
In high school though they both worked about 20 hours a week. Especially since he is repeating you'd think he could do something. Still with all the issues he has had with education I'm not sure rocking his boat while he is actually doing high school again is worth the small amount of money with the big picture if the goal still is to go to University.

How was his first round of grades after returning? Is he still moving this weekend?

He's not moving. Probably not ever!
Report cards haven't been issued yet, but he says he got 74, and 2 x 90-something. We'll see.

 

[MOXOMUMD]

8 days until Valentine's Day.

 

[Gabe1]

He's not moving. Probably not ever!
Report cards haven't been issued yet, but he says he got 74, and 2 x 90-something. We'll see.

Do you have access in Canada to adult children grades. We do not here, legally anyhow unless they are disabled in some way.

 

[Gabe1]

If she dies in Africa, she will be buried there.

Right now, she is accomplishing very little, and only because she has two young people on their first mission trip staying with her. When Chloe and Sean leave in 6 weeks, she will be on her own.

The conditions in her village have seriously deteriorated in the past 6 months. Nobody has running water right now, and she has to pay someone to fetch her 3 jugs every day from the central depot.
She had an invasion of army ants (think IJ/Crystal Skull) and they had to pour kerosene all around the perimetre of the home, and set it ablaze. You know, 'cause burning kerosene is so good for the breathing-impaired.

Things just aren't going well this trip. Customs refuses to clear our food container. The longer they stall, the more food expires, the less likely it will ever be cleared!
It just may be God's way of telling her to turn the work over to a younger, more well-funded group. And maybe she just doesn't want to hear.

Not sure. Also, not my mother.
My mother, her sister, chose not to deal with her own serious medical condition, and died within 5 hours, at the ripe old age of 62.

I completely understand what you guys want. Any idea of what the Auntie wants? That is always a difficult conversation, we don't want to loose the ones we love. As I said I watched that with my Gran and she suffered a great deal because my uncle could not cope with her passing the way she wanted to pass. I'm to a lesser degree watching this with my DH and his Mom and her progressing dementia. He knows it deep down, the accepting of the inevitable has not happened. Conditions or not maybe that is where Aunties heart is and where she has made peace with. It is a hard decision for her and you guys and a lot to pray on.

 

[JenniferS]

Do you have access in Canada to adult children grades. We do not here, legally anyhow unless they are disabled in some way.

Nope, no access. Once he turned 18, I was shut out.
I've offered him $$ -
$20 for 75-79
$50 for 80-84
$100 for anything over 85.

It's up to him if he shows me.

 

[JenniferS]

I completely understand what you guys want. Any idea of what the Auntie wants? That is always a difficult conversation, we don't want to loose the ones we love. As I said I watched that with my Gran and she suffered a great deal because my uncle could not cope with her passing the way she wanted to pass. I'm to a lesser degree watching this with my DH and his Mom and her progressing dementia. He knows it deep down, the accepting of the inevitable has not happened. Conditions or not maybe that is where Aunties heart is and where she has made peace with. It is a hard decision for her and you guys and a lot to pray on.

Again, not my mom, so I have no say.
That being said, her missionary zeal has hardened the hearts of two of her children.
If she continues to be "selfish" (their words, not mine), and she dies over there, they will never forgive her ... or God. I'm sure that the last thing Auntie wants to do is turn two of her own children completely against God.

Me, I get it. I understand her mission. As you may have discerned, I am very involved in supporting her.
But, I do think that unless her health dramatically improves, she may be more good to the ministry back here, rather than there, given that she hasn't been anywhere but to the clinic (twice) in the three weeks she's been there.

We'll see what transpires. Cuz sent the email already, and pointed all fingers at me. "You don't think I threw you under the bus, do you?"

* Uh yeah! But that's okay; I'm a big girl, I can take it.

 

[MinnieM123]

I would have enjoyed seeing the Minnie colorblind outfit.

Yes, I was quite the sight to behold!

 

[MinnieM123]

Me either. They have "ants on a log" as an option with my daughter's lunch sometimes and she always gets it.

Your daughter eats ants for lunch?!