Has anyone ever had another guest start an issue with you?

[JenniferS]

Last trip I had adults who thought they could tell me what to do. Once, I was in the preshow room at Dinosaur, standing in the back (up against the back wall actually) and mouthing the words (not speaking!) an a woman turned around and shushed me. 1. How old do you think I am? and 2. My parents are standing right there! Don't you think if anyone should be telling me what to do it would be them? I'm heading out tomorrow without my parents (just me and a friend) so it should be interesting to see if there are any bossy "adults"

Take me along, and I promise to deal with any mean old bossy adults on your behalf.
P.S. Are we eating at 'Ohana and CRT?

 

[StarWarsGirl]

Take me along, and I promise to deal with any mean old bossy adults on your behalf.
P.S. Are we eating at 'Ohana and CRT?

No, but we are eating at Kona!

 

[JenniferS]

No, but we are eating at Kona!

Brekkie?
Mmmmmm ... macadamia nut pancakes with sausage, and French press coffee.

 

[ExtinctJenn]

Not to play devils advocate... but could you not also make that argument for children on the autism spectrum.

My wife holds a BA and Masters in special education specializing with autistic children and she does a lot of work with local organizations in creating IEP's and such and she's often appalled how many parents bring their children to Disney who really shouldn't be there.

The combination of sounds, colors, the weather, and the general environmental experience leads to some serious break down amongst special needs children. Makes you think why parents put their kids through that.

I have a lot of experience myself working with kids with autism and other special needs. I also have a lot of experience being a parent, and observing meltdowns from non-autistic kids and adults at the parks. But I don't pretend to be smart enough to know from casual observation who belongs at the parks and who doesn't, and who's a good or a bad parent. Making those sorts of judgments reflects a combination of arrogance and ignorance, especially if you've never been a parent yourself.

Some parents of autistic children have explained on these boards in detail how trips to WDW have helped their kids. Many other posters have explained how different autistic kids can be from each other, and how you can't always predict how they'll react to new experiences, or how one kid's reactions may change over time. You should read some of those posts.

As the parent of a child with a mental illness (that includes issues found in the autistic spectrum) I can share personally that our vacations to WDW bring out the best in our son. It definitely depends on the child but in many cases it's as simple as taking them out of their normal routine. My son has been going since he was 10m old. Some trips he's had more issues than others but on every trip, the time we spent on property was far better (melt down wise) than equal time spent at home. The key again though is, you have to know your child. Just because on paper they shouldn't be able to handle the noise, weather, etc. doesn't mean that when put into the situation it'll pan out as predicted. I know this, at home we deal with multiple daily melt downs that are very trying and in our week on property earlier this month, we had one.

 

[StarWarsGirl]

Brekkie?
Mmmmmm ... macadamia nut pancakes with sausage, and French press coffee.

Both breakfast and dinner. On the same day actually.

Blueberry pancakes!

 

[SagamoreBeach]

Last trip I had adults who thought they could tell me what to do. Once, I was in the preshow room at Dinosaur, standing in the back (up against the back wall actually) and mouthing the words (not speaking!) an a woman turned around and shushed me. 1. How old do you think I am? and 2. My parents are standing right there! Don't you think if anyone should be telling me what to do it would be them? I'm heading out tomorrow without my parents (just me and a friend) so it should be interesting to see if there are any bossy "adults"

Those bossy adults are everywhere! I attended a friend's funeral two weeks ago. I sat in the very back row of this really large church minding my own business. When it came time to kneel I just sat there quietly minding my own business - because I have a knee and hip problem and I feared once down I might not be able to get back up again without any great deal of difficulty. Anyway - a woman taps me on the shoulder and tells me...You need to kneel now! I thought ! I'm a 53 year old man - attending my friend's funeral and I need this? So, I said...I'm sorry. I don't speak your language. What are you saying? You have to kneel. Timmy fell in the well? Kneel there on that thing! What is it girl? She finally got the hint and went back to where she came from. Sheesh, that irritated me!

 

[ddbowdoin]

No offense to your wife, I have a lot of admiration and respect for anyone who works with special needs children, but what's on an IEP and what's on their reports isn't correct as to every aspect of that child's personality or if they will be able to handle a park. Heck, sometimes the reports aren't even right as to their level of academic achievement. Parents know their children individually best, and they can determine whether or not their child can handle WDW. My younger brother has autism and does great with WDW and DL (we didn't even need GAC/DAC until 2013), as have some of his classmates. Others may not be able to handle it. It depends on the child, and personally, I am not going to judge any parent who takes their child to WDW. Parents who fail to discipline their child? That's a different story, autism or not.

You're using a classic example of person-who reasoning... (my grandfather smoked for 60 years and died of natural causes, so smoking isn't bad for you) go back and read what I wrote, I didn't say all children with autism, I wrote that certain children who are on varying levels of the spectrum show great signs of distress when at WDW, a case in point is just going there and seeing the signs.

 

[StarWarsGirl]

You're using a classic example of person-who reasoning... (my grandfather smoked for 60 years and died of natural causes, so smoking isn't bad for you) go back and read what I wrote, I didn't say all children with autism, I wrote that certain children who are on varying levels of the spectrum show great signs of distress when at WDW, a case in point is just going there and seeing the signs.

I understand that, but meltdowns are bound to happen with a child with autism regardless of where they are. You are right that not every child can handle it, but you seem to indicate that you can determine that based on observing a child briefly in the parks or looking at their record (which, I hate to tell you, is quite often wrong).

 

[StarWarsGirl]

Those bossy adults are everywhere! I attended a friend's funeral two weeks ago. I sat in the very back row of this really large church minding my own business. When it came time to kneel I just sat there quietly minding my own business - because I have a knee and hip problem and I feared once down I might not be able to get back up again without any great deal of difficulty. Anyway - a woman taps me on the shoulder and tells me...You need to kneel now! I thought ***! I'm a 53 year old man - attending my friend's funeral and I need this? So, I said...I'm sorry. I don't speak your language. What are you saying? You have to kneel. Timmy fell in the well? Kneel there on that thing! What is it girl? She finally got the hint and went back to where she came from. Sheesh, that irritated me!

Lol, sometimes I wonder if it's me because I'm only 18 or if it's the person. I think age is a factor sometimes, but your example was just funny. And also, that person was rude. And needed to mind her own business.

 

[Crazydisneyfanluke]

I have a lot of experience myself working with kids with autism and other special needs. I also have a lot of experience being a parent, and observing meltdowns from non-autistic kids and adults at the parks. But I don't pretend to be smart enough to know from casual observation who belongs at the parks and who doesn't, and who's a good or a bad parent. Making those sorts of judgments reflects a combination of arrogance and ignorance, especially if you've never been a parent yourself.

Some parents of autistic children have explained on these boards in detail how trips to WDW have helped their kids. Many other posters have explained how different autistic kids can be from each other, and how you can't always predict how they'll react to new experiences, or how one kid's reactions may change over time. You should read some of those posts.

If i remember correctly, wasn't there a special needs child who rode Snow whites scary adventure a ton of times and was the last one to ride it?

 

[JenniferS]

Those bossy adults are everywhere! I attended a friend's funeral two weeks ago. I sat in the very back row of this really large church minding my own business. When it came time to kneel I just sat there quietly minding my own business - because I have a knee and hip problem and I feared once down I might not be able to get back up again without any great deal of difficulty. Anyway - a woman taps me on the shoulder and tells me...You need to kneel now! I thought ***! I'm a 53 year old man - attending my friend's funeral and I need this? So, I said...I'm sorry. I don't speak your language. What are you saying? You have to kneel. Timmy fell in the well? Kneel there on that thing! What is it girl? She finally got the hint and went back to where she came from. Sheesh, that irritated me!

Your choice of course, but I would have just said, "Bad knee, can't kneel". I guarantee she would have felt much worse, and may in fact, think twice before butting in next time.

 

[Tom]

If i remember correctly, wasn't there a special needs child who rode Snow whites scary adventure a ton of times and was the last one to ride it?

Yes, Ben. His dad, @Lokheed is a long time member here on the boards. You can check out the entire story on his Blog (http://www.shmoolok.com/Blog/tabid/62/EntryId/53/SWSA-Final-Night-Prelude.aspx), or even buy his book!

 

[EvilQueen-T]

My sister and I were in the queue for the old test track in the room where you would watch the video before getting in the last line to load into the cars. We were some of the last people entering the room and everyone was basically still standing in line not filling in the space (despite the cm telling everyone to fill in the room and specifically said to the room in general you don't need to stay in a line etc...) when the family directly in front of us stepped out of the line to do as the cm asked when all of a sudden the man directly in front of them started screaming at them, getting in what I assume was the father of the groups face, that they weren't going to get away with cutting in line and that he'd beat his a$*. The angry man was only inches away from the fathers face. I was in total shock. The cm either didn't hear or didn't want to get involved and never stepped in but for us it was the most uncomfortable feeling as the doors shut to start the movie not knowing if we were about to be shut in a room with a fist fight about to break out.

 

[SagamoreBeach]

Your choice of course, but I would have just said, "Bad knee, can't kneel". I guarantee she would have felt much worse, and may in fact, think twice before butting in next time.

True. I could have. But it wasn't my turn to fix her.
-Tony

 

[Lokheed]

If i remember correctly, wasn't there a special needs child who rode Snow whites scary adventure a ton of times and was the last one to ride it?

Yup, that would be my son Benjamin. (Shameless self-promotion: I wrote a book about the whole thing, there is a link in my signature below if you are interested).

Over the past ten years I have met several other families who bring their autistic children to the park. Sometimes it is a good experience, sometimes not so much. On balance with Ben it has been an overwhelmingly positive experience, but there have been days when it has been not great for anyone.

There was one occasion in particular when Ben started randomly hitting and kicking strangers in line for Peter Pan's Flight for no apparent reason, something just triggered him and he became openly hostile. From the middle of the line I had to physically pick him up and carry him out of the queue while holding him in a bear hug to contain him. I heard more than one person make disparaging comments aimed at me for being a terrible parent, abusing and manhandling my child like that. In the moment all I could do was contain my child and prevent him from harming anyone else, and I really didn't have the time or energy to explain things to random strangers. If someone had gotten in my face just then, I might well have fit right in here with the other bad experiences people are describing.

My points being:
1) You never really know the full story of anything that is happening around you, so perhaps don't be so quick to judge.
2) Families with autistic children are just like any other families with children - sometimes we have good days, sometimes we have bad days, most of the time going to Disney is an awesome experience, but some of the time it is just hellish.

I really do try to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume positive intent. We are in the parks all the time, but for a lot of guests they have spent a ton of money for a very short time on what will probably be their one and only trip to Disney. They are under a lot of pressure to get the most out of their trip, and people under pressure tend to break in very unpredictable and unflattering ways. It doesn't make it right or okay, but it is at least predictable and understandable.

 

[ExtinctJenn]

My points being:
1) You never really know the full story of anything that is happening around you, so perhaps don't be so quick to judge.
2) Families with autistic children are just like any other families with children - sometimes we have good days, sometimes we have bad days, most of the time going to Disney is an awesome experience, but some of the time it is just hellish.

This is so so true and true anywhere, not just Disney. On this past trip, when my son did have his one big meltdown (at DtD) people were pointing and mumbling under their breath as they passed. They had no sympathy/empathy to the situation at all and were simply judging what they saw. To anyone from the sidelines it would've appeared that my son was a spoiled brat pitching a fit and we were horrible parents for either saying no or allowing him to go on like that without punishing him and/or pulling him away from the situation. Had they known however that he has a mental disorder and his therapists and doctors have given us pretty specific advice about handling those times (including walking away and ignoring him) maybe they'd have shut their mouths and moved on about their vacation.

That kind of turned into a rant but the point is valid. Too often people judge based on what they see without having any insight into what the real situation is, especially in a case where 75% of the time my child appears to be a normal happy 7-year old boy.

 

[Crazydisneyfanluke]

Too often people judge based on what they see without having any insight into what the real situation is,

This.

 

[graphite1326]

Your choice of course, but I would have just said, "Bad knee, can't kneel". I guarantee she would have felt much worse, and may in fact, think twice before butting in next time.

You are being kind. I would have told her to go mind her own #@$%^*! business. With a smile on my face of course.

 

[GoofGoof]

Yes, Ben. His dad, @Lokheed is a long time member here on the boards. You can check out the entire story on his Blog (http://www.shmoolok.com/Blog/tabid/62/EntryId/53/SWSA-Final-Night-Prelude.aspx), or even buy his book!

Thanks for the tip. I checked out the blog then bought the kindle book and read it in less than 24hrs.

Yup, that would be my son Benjamin. (Shameless self-promotion: I wrote a book about the whole thing, there is a link in my signature below if you are interested).

Great read. Anyone who is a fan of WDW would appreciate this book. I am a big fan of the Unoffical Guide books too and I remember the reference to your family. Who knows we may have even crossed paths at the parks on one of my trips. The last days of Snow White was right around when I started actively posting on these boards.

1) You never really know the full story of anything that is happening around you, so perhaps don't be so quick to judge.

This is advice to live by that extends beyond WDW and can be applied to anyone.

 

[Belle457]

I usually go to WDW during low crowd seasons and have never had anything happen other than the occasional collision from some not paying attention or the bump of a stroller now and then, but I had some uncomfortable experiences on my last trip.

My sister is a castmember and my mom and I braved the Christmas crowds so she wouldn't be alone for Christmas.

My sister works with the Celebrate the Seasons castle show. During her one day off during the Christmas/New years two weeks, we went into the parks so that she could watch the show she performs every day.

We waited near the back of one show and moved to the front for the next show. We went straight to the front and stood, making sure there was no one behind us. It was 45 minutes until the next show and we stood the entire time. With less then 10 minutes until the start of the show, the area behind us was still empty.

When the show started, the people who filled in behind us and were sitting (remember we have been standin for the last 45 minutes) started booing and yelling at us to sit down. You cannot see the show up front if you are sitting and we had been standing the entire time, so we ignored the calls. A lady carryng a baby came up and asked us to sit because she could not see while sitting in the crowd behind us. We told her we had been standing the entire time and we were not going to sit. She got mad and said something else, but we ignored her. She then said we should be ashamed because her kids can't see. We again ignored her and she left. Someone next to my mom continued to hit her in the back throughout the show, but we ignored it and my sister ended up with a nice experience watching her show and interacting with characters on stage who recognized her.

After the show my sister told me that a lot of cast members in the show who come to watch it on their day off have similar experiences of standing the entire time before the show and then being boo'd.

It really bothered me that families chose to sit behind standing people and then attempted to bully them into sitting.