Did I Really Just See That.....in Disney World?????

[Kelsybelle]

Originally posted by eliezrah:
RAN with her to the nearest bathroom (I even had to carry her to get her there faster and I was 23 weeks PG).

You are definaley "Super Mom!" LOL!
I'm not at the potty training stage yet (DD will be 2 in August) but I would
think if you were to let a child who was in the middle of potty training relieve themselves anywhere but the restroom you might be undoing some of your hard work!

Originally posted by eliezrah:
this was not one or two hits, this was a full on beating! The mom was going on and on whipping this kid like there was no tomorrow, when all he did was hold onto a chain...

I'm assuming your kids got to see that as well? It's bad enough that you had to see it but for children to see that is totally unacceptable!

 

[Mybails]

I have spanked my children and on very rare occasions, my grandchildren. I have not and would not beat them. They have recieved a whack on the butt for things such as hitting others, taking things that are not theirs, not telling the truth, and openly defying an adult (this has to be very open such as "NO I WON'T". I normally call the whack an attention getter. It works. I am also the parent and grandparent that they enjoy hanging with the most and my house has always been the main hangout for the neighborhood. I reward good behaviour and I take away privileges for bad behaviour. I believe in biting a biter, a 2 year old doesn't associate their biting with pain for another, you have to show them that. I once was bit repeatedly by a 4 year old, when I told him if he bit me again I would bite him, his mother (a relative) replied that she didn't believe in lowering herself to a child's level. I promptly asked her how she intended to raise him to hers. He bit me again and I put my teeth on his arm, bit softly enough for him to notice and he said ow. Guess what? He never bit anyone again and she called a week later to say that I had been right. I had been raising children for 11 years by then. I knew I was right. No parent should use corporal punishment as an every day occurence but we must instill the idea to our children that there is an ultimate cost to misbehaviour. Grabbing a toy or swinging on a chain should be dealt with by taking the toy back and removing the child from the play area or making them stand still beside you away from the chain. But I cannot agree with the "Johnny, it's not nice to kick the lady" stuff, my gang get an immediate "Stop that and apologize" at first and if they continue will be removed the area and probably will get a whack, before being marched back to give the apology that was ordered. Youth crime is not increasing because a child is spanked, youth crime is increasing because all too often, the youths know that society is not going to punish them because they are too young to know better. If they know they won't get punished, they know they are doing wrong and should be punished.

 

[Scott951]

Originally posted by eliezrah:
this was not one or two hits, this was a full on beating! The mom was going on and on whipping this kid like there was no tomorrow, when all he did was hold onto a chain...

I'm assuming your kids got to see that as well? It's bad enough that you had to see it but for children to see that is totally unacceptable!

Luckily this occurred back in March 2007 when it was just Lisa (Eliezrah) and I (we went twice last year, once in October with the kids and once in March when I went to a convention in Orlando for work). However, there were kids there and I am sure it did not do them good to witness that.

 

[RiversideBunny]

Where's Dexter when you need him?
He lives in Florida.

 

[Vernonpush]

I have spanked my children and on very rare occasions, my grandchildren. I have not and would not beat them. They have recieved a whack on the butt for things such as hitting others, taking things that are not theirs, not telling the truth, and openly defying an adult (this has to be very open such as "NO I WON'T". I normally call the whack an attention getter. It works. I am also the parent and grandparent that they enjoy hanging with the most and my house has always been the main hangout for the neighborhood. I reward good behaviour and I take away privileges for bad behaviour. I believe in biting a biter, a 2 year old doesn't associate their biting with pain for another, you have to show them that. I once was bit repeatedly by a 4 year old, when I told him if he bit me again I would bite him, his mother (a relative) replied that she didn't believe in lowering herself to a child's level. I promptly asked her how she intended to raise him to hers. He bit me again and I put my teeth on his arm, bit softly enough for him to notice and he said ow. Guess what? He never bit anyone again and she called a week later to say that I had been right. I had been raising children for 11 years by then. I knew I was right. No parent should use corporal punishment as an every day occurence but we must instill the idea to our children that there is an ultimate cost to misbehaviour. Grabbing a toy or swinging on a chain should be dealt with by taking the toy back and removing the child from the play area or making them stand still beside you away from the chain. But I cannot agree with the "Johnny, it's not nice to kick the lady" stuff, my gang get an immediate "Stop that and apologize" at first and if they continue will be removed the area and probably will get a whack, before being marched back to give the apology that was ordered. Youth crime is not increasing because a child is spanked, youth crime is increasing because all too often, the youths know that society is not going to punish them because they are too young to know better. If they know they won't get punished, they know they are doing wrong and should be punished.

I agree, it only took me once to know the curse of my "Father's Belt". If I ever got close to that again ("Don't make me take off my belt"), I would do as told at once.
Today's children know that they won't have to pay the consequences of their actions. "That's not nice, little Jimmy. You shouldn't do that" is one reason that there has been an increase of crimes in the last few decades. "Spare the rod, and spoil the child"

*Off my soap-box.*

My OMG moment was at AK after a showing of Festival of the Lion King. Having a weak bladder, I proceeded to the Men's Room at Camp Minnie Mickey followed by a father and two daughters. I relieve myself (at the urinals) as the father takes his offspring to "the stalls". As I'm drying my hands (after washing) the father is saying "go wash your hands" to the youngest daughter while he finnishes up with the older one. I see her walk over to the urinals with hands extended and scream "NO!". The father comes over and says "Thank you", and I say "No problem" as I exit trying to hold back the laughter.

 

[earningmyfins]

Sickness

During 96 when the 25th Anniversary was present my brother, mom, and I went on Splash Mountain for the first time. Afterward my dad bought one giant turkey leg and stuff our faces. Although it was yummy my brother and I felt sick because we were eating too fast.

Later in the night my parents wanted to take us to SpectroMagic and my brother stopped right in front of the Cinderella Castle (in Disney World, Florida) and puked. I was so embarassed for him. Afterward a Disney cast member came up to us and told my father to get out of the street. My dad started to complain that my brother had just thrown up and that we wouldn't move till he felt better. The cast member argued and than escorted us to the First Aid.

I had to watch the parade from first aid...

 

[Vernonpush]

Originally posted by eliezrah:
this was not one or two hits, this was a full on beating! The mom was going on and on whipping this kid like there was no tomorrow, when all he did was hold onto a chain...

I'm assuming your kids got to see that as well? It's bad enough that you had to see it but for children to see that is totally unacceptable![/QUOTE]

That is when you tell your children:
"This is what happens when you don't do what you're told, let that be a lesson to you".

 

[fosse76]

Amen to that! :sohappy:

I am a firm believer in corporal punishment. And when I was a child, one of the dreaded sights was seeing Dad get out of his chair and undo his belt...because I knew he wasn't getting ready to go to the restroom! :lol:

If you have to hit your child to get them to listen to you, then you aren't raising them properly. You aren't teaching them right from wrong, only that they will be hit for not listening to you.

 

[Scott951]

That is when you tell your children:
"This is what happens when you don't do what you're told, let that be a lesson to you".

Considering my wife and I would never raise our hands to our children, these words would never leave our lips.

In my opinion, there are just better ways to parent than to hit your kids.

 

[Scott951]

If you have to hit your child to get them to listen to you, then you aren't raising them properly. You aren't teaching them right from wrong, only that they will be hit for not listening to you.

Amen

 

[Grim Grinner]

In 2000, the wife and I saw Fantasmic for the first time. It was a wonderful show that lived up to the hype.

Sadly, there was a child behind me with snotty hands (I'm talking strands of mucus) who kept punching my head and grabbing all over me.

I turn to the parents and give them a questioning look, but they shrugged at me.

The little kid stands up and kicks me in the head while the parents try to stifle a laugh. My glasses dropped, getting scuffed but not broken. I again try to gesture to the parents to gather some measure of control.

The kid went to slobber all over me, but the wife-having had enough pushes him backwards and says "No!"

A couple next to us offered to slide down so we wouldn't be in harms way and so we did.

Back at the hotel, my shirt's back was all but crusty with snot. I ended up getting sick for the last part of my honeymoon, but it wasn't enough to stop me from enjoying the trip.

 

[WildLodgeFan]

Perhaps we could get some insight from some of our British members?

Unkadug - just wanted to say I love your new avatar. Is that an old logo?

 

[eliezrah]

If you have to hit your child to get them to listen to you, then you aren't raising them properly. You aren't teaching them right from wrong, only that they will be hit for not listening to you.

Even though my DH already quoted you and agreed with you, I have to agree as well.

My children know what's right and wrong and can tell you if something is nice or not. Do they mess up a bit? Of course, they are 2 and 4 years old. But they do normal typical toddler/ preschool things like argue over toys and stuff. How do we handle it? We talk to them about what they did wrong so they UNDERSTAND and tell them they will get a consequence if they do it again. Then we follow through with that consequence. They remember what was taken away from them and that's what we "threaten" with the next time. I.E. remember when you couldn't watch tv all day because you did x,y,z? Well if you do it one more time you'll lose tv again." We pick something that's very important or meaningful to them (losing tv, going to bed w/o a story, leaving a friend's house or wherever we are, getting time out, etc) and take that away from them. According to ALL THE EXPERTS in child rearing, this is the best way to handle discipline since it shows them violence is NOT the answer (how can you tell your kids not to hit and then you hit them? That confuses them and shows them to do what you say and not what you do.). Taking away things as punishment and using time outs, etc still shows them there are consequences but also teaches them violence is WRONG.

The main thing with this type of discipline is following through with what you "threaten," which we do. Our children don't ever get away w/o getting punished for doing something wrong. Our children don't respect us because they fear us, they respect us for being loving and nurturing parents and teaching them by showing them what is right and wrong.

That is when you tell your children:
"This is what happens when you don't do what you're told, let that be a lesson to you".

Like Scott said, we would never raise a hand to a defenseless child so we would never say that or threaten that to our children.

Originally posted by eliezrah:
RAN with her to the nearest bathroom (I even had to carry her to get her there faster and I was 23 weeks PG).

You are definaley "Super Mom!" LOL!
I'm not at the potty training stage yet (DD will be 2 in August) but I would
think if you were to let a child who was in the middle of potty training relieve themselves anywhere but the restroom you might be undoing some of your hard work!

LOL Thanks!!! It was NOT easy to do, but I didn't want her to get upset by having an accident if I could prevent it. You are right, letting them go anywhere but the bathroom shows them that it's acceptable to do so. They won't know the difference between going behind a trash can at WDW or in the mall unless you be consistent!

As for hitting children, look up any article online or ask any pediatrician or child development expert, or anyone who's studied child development or worked with young kids, and they will all say the same thing...

Spanking
According to a BabyCenter poll, 85 percent of you were spanked as kids, and 69 percent of you do the same to your own children. A typical comment: "I was spanked when I deserved it. I think it kept me in line, and I spank my 2-year-old, too." Many parents say they only hit their child for downright dangerous behavior, like when a toddler runs into the street.

Some parents say a swat on the bottom is an effective discipline tool when all else fails — others call it child abuse. "I remember what I was wearing, how much she hit me, how I resisted, and the crying, pain, anger, and fear," writes one mom. "I do not remember the lesson or the deed."

What the experts say...

Toss it Spanking mostly shows that when you're bigger than someone it's okay to hit to show your anger or to hit to get your own way. The hurt, not the learning opportunity, becomes the message. There are three good alternatives: isolation (like a time-out), deprivation (taking away a privilege), and reparation (where a child works to right a wrong before doing anything else). The goal is to get your child to think twice before making the same mistake.
— Carl Pickhardt, The Everything Parent's Guide to Positive Discipline

Toss it Spanking is a temporary solution that does more harm than good. It "works" because it's external control over a child, but it doesn't promote internal decision-making. It simply teaches children to behave — or else. Spanking causes many children to focus on the punishment rather than on their poor decision. Spanking also has side effects. It's embarrassing, and that causes children to get angry or think about retaliation. Children who are frequently hit feel insecure. Many have poor self-esteem. Some withdraw. Others become excitable, overactive, and aggressive.
— Sal Severe, How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too!

Toss it How are we going to teach our children it's not okay to hurt others when we keep hurting them? For 2- to 4-year-olds, lots of supervision along with distraction and redirection are better tools. All the spanking in the world won't teach a child it isn't safe to run into a busy street until he's developmentally ready to learn that lesson.

Some children will push and push until they get a spanking and then settle down. They've been conditioned not to settle down or cooperate until they're spanked. Instead, try holding a disobedient child firmly on your lap. No matter how much she struggles, don't let go until she calms down or agrees to cooperate.
— Jane Nelsen, the Positive Discipline series

 

[WildLodgeFan]

My siblings and I also grew up never having any trouble with the law, never been in a fight, graduated and do charitable work all over the world and we have never once been hit by our parents with hand, belt or anything else so I guess it can work both ways :shrug:

Goes to show that different approaches work with different parents and different kids. I'm not against corporeal punishment within reason - I've certainly given my children the spank on the bottom when they deserved it. But I agree, I think based on the original post, it seemed the punishment with the belt was excessive.

 

[WildLodgeFan]

I have spanked my children and on very rare occasions, my grandchildren. I have not and would not beat them. They have recieved a whack on the butt for things such as hitting others, taking things that are not theirs, not telling the truth, and openly defying an adult (this has to be very open such as "NO I WON'T". I normally call the whack an attention getter. It works. I am also the parent and grandparent that they enjoy hanging with the most and my house has always been the main hangout for the neighborhood. I reward good behaviour and I take away privileges for bad behaviour. I believe in biting a biter, a 2 year old doesn't associate their biting with pain for another, you have to show them that. I once was bit repeatedly by a 4 year old, when I told him if he bit me again I would bite him, his mother (a relative) replied that she didn't believe in lowering herself to a child's level. I promptly asked her how she intended to raise him to hers. He bit me again and I put my teeth on his arm, bit softly enough for him to notice and he said ow. Guess what? He never bit anyone again and she called a week later to say that I had been right. I had been raising children for 11 years by then. I knew I was right. No parent should use corporal punishment as an every day occurence but we must instill the idea to our children that there is an ultimate cost to misbehaviour. Grabbing a toy or swinging on a chain should be dealt with by taking the toy back and removing the child from the play area or making them stand still beside you away from the chain. But I cannot agree with the "Johnny, it's not nice to kick the lady" stuff, my gang get an immediate "Stop that and apologize" at first and if they continue will be removed the area and probably will get a whack, before being marched back to give the apology that was ordered. Youth crime is not increasing because a child is spanked, youth crime is increasing because all too often, the youths know that society is not going to punish them because they are too young to know better. If they know they won't get punished, they know they are doing wrong and should be punished.

Amen - my philosophy exactly. One of the major issues is that we do not make kids accept responsibility for their behavior.

 

[eliezrah]

Amen - my philosophy exactly. One of the major issues is that we do not make kids accept responsibility for their behavior.

That's a pretty big generalization. Just because I don't spank my kids doesn't mean I fit into your generalization. My kids take full responsibility for their actions and get punished if they do something wrong with an age appropriate time out or getting something taken away. Then we discuss what they did and why it was wrong so they can start to understand.

 

[Scott951]

Those damn Redsox!

I just thought of something else I could not believe I witnessed.

It was October 2004 and my wife and I were staying at the Pop Century resort on the bottom level in the 60's building right by the pool. Well those stinking Redsox were thumping the Cardinals at the time, and to my amazement, management let the outside pool bar show the game. That wasn't what I could not believe. The thing that ticked me off to this day is that 10-15 drunken guests were allowed to cavort outside screaming at the top of their lungs until the game ended at 12:30 in the morning.

Granted, we had no kids with us at the time, but they were right in the courtyard where there are tons of rooms with kids in them. I called to complain, and they said that they received a number of other complaints, but couldn't do anything because the pool bar was open until Midnight (even though they left it open until the end of the game).

They didn't even attempt to quiet down the guests.

Maybe this situation was made worse because I am a die hard Yankees fan :animwink::lol:, but if the shoe was on the other foot and the Yankees were in the world series that year, I would respect the other guests and not yell and scream.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[Pumbas Nakasak]

He he, the usual tree hugging nonsense, oh I reason with my child, yes because under the age of 10 they are really able to understand the concept.

Lets burn the incense, hold hands and sway......its a great big beautiful tomorrow.

However, such things are now the law, kids have rights, shame they ignore the responsibility part, but next time they do your house over, rob your granny or daub graffiti on the walls rest assured when they get caught they will be given a thorough reasoning with.

 

[KingStefan]

Here's how to get a kid with his head stuck in a railing out: hold him up by his feet so he's upside down then have him tuck his head towards his chest. It's the ears going in reverse that stops them from coming out, so by holding them upside down you eliminate that problem.

This has nothing whatsoever to do with Disney, but once when I was about 8 our neighbor's daughter (who was about 6) got her head stuck between the rails on the back of a kitchen chair. My family was having a BBQ dinner over at their house. She was scared, and she screamed at first and then just cried.

Well, to make a long story short, after an hour or two, just about every dad in the neighborhood had come over (some with power tools!), each with a different opinion about how to get her head out. The poor girl had had her head gently guided this way and that, her ears taped back, had lubricant (butter, I think) applied in various ways, etc.

I was sitting next to her head, encouraging her to be brave and telling her that I'm sure we'd get her out soon, etc. Then, all of a sudden, while all the men were standing around arguing about what to do next, she lifted her head and turned it a certain way and pulled it out will practically no effort at all, without anyone but me noticing. She calmly walked over to her mom and asked for a glass of water, and someone said "hey, look, Susie's got her head out!" And everybody cheered, and the men all had a beer and went home. One of my strongest childhood memories! So funny.

I think the joke is pretty nonsensical, as many jokes made up by small children tend to be. We just thought it was hysterical that the little girl found it so funny, and assumed everyone else did, too.

Unless there's actually some really witty punchline hidden in there that I missed, and the girl's actually a comedic genius.

Really, people, stop trying to make sense of it. To this day we kid my sister-in-law (who's now in her 30's) about how one day we were all sitting around telling jokes and she told this one: "What has three legs and hops? A telephone pole, of course!". She was also around 4.

DH and I saw tons of people who shouldn't have worn certain outfits. People who wear certain clothing thinking that it's comfortable or looks good on them does the EXACT OPPOSITE and just shows off the rolls of their fat (upper and lower body). When did back-fat, fupas, and muffin tops ever become sexy?:shrug:

Oh, I agree with you here. But what the heck is a "fupa"?

Edit: OK, just googled it and got to fupahunter.blogspot.com. Sorry I asked!! (although what is the origin of that word, I wonder - please don't answer - it's meant to be a rhetorical question!) Edit*2: OK, just found the answer to that, too

 

[Scott951]

He he, the usual tree hugging nonsense, oh I reason with my child, yes because under the age of 10 they are really able to understand the concept.

Lets burn the incense, hold hands and sway......its a great big beautiful tomorrow.

However, such things are now the law, kids have rights, shame they ignore the responsibility part, but next time they do your house over, rob your granny or daub graffiti on the walls rest assured when they get caught they will be given a thorough reasoning with.

So if all kids are hit by their parents, there would be no crimes? There's logic at work for ya!

The references above are from experts in their fields. Search some more and you would see the vast majority saying that hitting your kids is not acceptable (except in extraordinary cirumstances). As you mention there are laws protecting the kids, maybe there might even be a reason for that.

Once again, in my opinion, there are better methods of parenting. Hitting kids to me just sends the message that to get your point across you must hit someone. How can you discipline your kid for getting into a fight in school if this was the behavior you instilled in your kid?

This is my last comment on this subject. People definitely have different opinions, and one side will not change the other's mind.

Interesting discussion I must say. I never knew so many people were passionate about the opposite side of the spectrum when it comes to corporal punishment.