Where in the World is Bob Saget?

[JenniferS]

One thing to think about concerning that. My youngest Daughter and I have been very, very close since her birth. Not that I didn't love my oldest Daughter as much, but we connected on so many levels that it was like we were one person. I turn 66 this year. I know that at best, due to the dreadful way I took care of myself most of my life, that if I can get another 10 years out of it, I will be extremely lucky.

I said all that because, my son-in-law and I were playing golf one day and we got on the subject of aging. Then he made the statement..."I can tell you one thing, the day that you die I am going to want go into hiding". I asked why and he said, that I must realize that she worshiped me and no matter how hard he would try, he was never going to be able to console her for a long time. At first, in a proud daddy moment, I was flattered, but soon came to realize that the very last thing I would want for someone that I love that much, is to be unable to deal with things if I wasn't around anymore. Nothing would make me sadder then the thought of that happening. I certainly understand that she might feel sad, for some time, but, I want her to realize her own importance and not spend years mourning my passing. An unfortunate turn of the facts of life is that we all die as some point in time. It is an expected part of life, yet, we have such a hard time accepting that it is not negotiable.

As far as that goes, I have been unable to discuss my thoughts or feelings about my own mortality with either of them. I understand that but there are things that they need to know if my wishes are to be respected when that time comes. What I have done is left sealed letters to both of them. I have told them that they exist and where they are located since neither of them wish to discuss it. One is 40 and the other is 38. I want them to remember the fun times we had as a family, the times we spent at Disney or whatever else we might have done together. I really don't want them to saddened by those memories, I want them to feel whatever affection they might have or have had toward me and smile about our time together.

I'm sure that your Dad wouldn't want you to be that upset over a normal human event such as dying. If he were alive he would do anything in his power to help you through it. My Father passed away in 1995, my mother in 2005. I still think about them almost daily in some form or the other, but, I remember them fondly, I remember some of my Fathers favorite jokes and have probably used them on these boards from time to time. I even remember my Mothers inability to understand that I was grown up and functioning independently for many years. I was always going to be her little boy. When she was alive it totally aggravated me, now I look at it knowing it was her love for me that wouldn't allow her to let go. All of us, with luck, have to deal with this at some point in our lives. Love what you had, cherish what you had, but understand that they loved you and, at least in my case, took their job of raising me as a independent and able person to face life with strength and resolve to move forward.

In the meantime, I hope that you can feel better and less sad.

Thank you for your kind words. You just blew your crusty curmudgeon persona.

I adored my dad. I had three younger brothers, and everyone always knew that Jen was the favourite.

My dad was 5' 9". Hubby is 6' 8". And I honestly believed, right up until a couple of weeks before he died, that he could "take" my husband.

My relationship with my dad was the least complicated relationship I ever had. He loved me fully and completely, just for who I was. He didn't NEED anything or want anything from me.

Hubby loves me almost as much, but at the end of the day, let's be honest, he wants something from me. Hint, hint. Treating me like a queen benefits him.

My mom and I were very close, but the mother/daughter dynamic is always complicated. She was very needy, and more or less promoted me to being the parent when I was a teenager. At her funeral, so many people told me how strong she was. My aunt (her sister) and I just looked at each other and whispered, "I guess they didn't really know her, did they?"

My dad, however, was very strong. He addressed his impending mortality head on. He talked about it. He prepared for it. But most of all, he prepared US for it.

I am a deeply religious person, and I truly believe that we will be reunited in Heaven. That being said, some days just suck. The Olympic Opening Ceremony (despite not watching it) was a trigger today. My second favourite SIL (I have 9 of them) was diagnosed with a golf ball sized brain tumour last week. Prognosis and treatment are being determined. I think that is weighing on me too.

I am not the type to share my feelings with people I know. That's just not me. Ergo, I dumped on all you. Folks, I consider my friends ... without any of you really knowing me.

 

[donaldtoo]

Then what was with that rant that my father went on the day he turned 50 for absolutely no reason?

Oh my.
My 50th was one of the best b-days I've ever had. My DWifey and kiddos got me my first iPhone and sent me on my first ever helicopter ride. It was AWESOME!!!

 

[acishere]

I'm glad they are explaining what is happening during the opening ceremonies because I don't get a lot of it. Does anyone else find it boring?

I hate how they talk when it is just a dance sequence, but they just leave us hanging when a guy starts speaking in Russian. This isn't live NBC. You had plenty of time to add some subtitles.

 

[JenniferS]

On a totally different note - our local Dairy Queen re-opened today. (It closes on Canadian Thanksgiving weekend, and re-opens the Friday before Valentine's Day.)

Sadly, for the first time in 10+ years, I wasn't a Day 1 customer.

 

[donaldtoo]

Thank you for your kind words. You just blew your crusty curmudgeon persona.

I adored my dad. I had three younger brothers, and everyone always knew that Jen was the favourite.

My dad was 5' 9". Hubby is 6' 8". And I honestly believed, right up until a couple of weeks before he died, that he could "take" my husband.

My relationship with my dad was the least complicated relationship I ever had. He loved me fully and completely, just for who I was. He didn't NEED anything or want anything from me.

Hubby loves me almost as much, but at the end of the day, let's be honest, he wants something from me. Hint, hint. Treating me like a queen benefits him.

My mom and I were very close, but the mother/daughter dynamic is always complicated. She was very needy, and more or less promoted me to being the parent when I was a teenager. At her funeral, so many people told me how strong she was. My aunt (her sister) and I just looked at each other and whispered, "I guess they didn't really know her, did they?"

My dad, however, was very strong. He addressed his impending mortality head on. He talked about it. He prepared for it. But most of all, he prepared US for it.

I am a deeply religious person, and I truly believe that we will be reunited in Heaven. That being said, some days just suck. The Olympic Opening Ceremony (despite not watching it) was a trigger today. My second favourite SIL (I have 9 of them) was diagnosed with a golf ball sized brain tumour last week. Prognosis and treatment are being determined. I think that is weighing on me too.

I am not the type to share my feelings with people I know. That's just not me. Ergo, I dumped on all you. Folks, I consider my friends ... without any of you really knowing me.

Sincerely, I'm so very sorry you are having such a hard time with all that you've been through. I cannot even imagine the emotions I will go through when I finally lose my parents. Although, in the spirit of lightening things up a bit and maybe putting just a touch of a smile on your face, the way things are lookin', I may go well before them.
Which, sadly, is also most parents worst nightmare...their children going before them.
Anyway, I hope you find more peace soon, as you seem like the kind of person that deserves to be happy.

 

[JenniferS]

Sincerely, I'm so very sorry you are having such a hard time with all that you've been through. I cannot even imagine the emotions I will go through when I finally lose my parents. Although, in the spirit of lightening things up a bit and maybe putting just a touch of a smile on your face, the way things are lookin', I may go well before them.
Which, sadly, is also most parents worst nightmare...their children going before them.
Anyway, I hope you find more peace soon, as you seem like the kind of person that deserves to be happy.

Thank you. I am normally a happy person.

Just sad today.
Time to go wash my face before hubby gets home. No need for him to know I've been crying all day.
FYI - My dad was his best friend. He actually had more time with my dad than with his own. My dad told him that he didn't love him LIKE a son - he loved him EQUAL to his own sons. Hubby cried more at my dad's funeral than at any funeral before. Or since.

And whatever it is that you're doing that makes you think you might check out before your parents - KNOCK IT OFF!

 

[donaldtoo]

I have the desire to pinch some of our administrators real hard sometimes. Weather, sure glad it is their call and not ours. The schools got beat up real bad in Atlanta, I on the other hand soooo understand how that happened. Well minus the part of not knowing where chunks of those kids were, that was bad.

Yea, I know even with computer models and such, weather's still kinda' a carp shoot (I mean, just one Gary Busey raw steak traf could throw the whole forecast completely outta' whack ), but, it still seems like grandma's bursitis did a better job.

 

[donaldtoo]

Thank you. I am normally a happy person.

Just sad today.
Time to go wash my face before hubby gets home. No need for him to know I've been crying all day.
FYI - My dad was his best friend. He actually had more time with my dad than with his own. My dad told him that he didn't love him LIKE a son - he loved him EQUAL to his own sons. Hubby cried more at my dad's funeral than at any funeral before. Or since.

And whatever it is that you're doing that makes you think you might check out before your parents - KNOCK IT OFF!

You're welcome, no problem. That's very cool about your hubby and your pop, although it would have been nice if he was closer to his own pop too.

As to that last part...
Thank you, too. Workin' on it...

 

[JenniferS]

This link highlights some of the best and worst of the Opening Ceremony outfits.
I'm not crazy about the Canadian outfits, although generally they received a thumbs up.

Sorry guys, I did not like (not even a little) the Team USA knitted jackets.

http://life.nationalpost.com/2014/0...-nations-outfits-are-the-olympics-of-fashion/

 

[donaldtoo]

Don't we get a free pass to buy a Porsche at 50?

Only if when you turn 50 you can afford one. Me, not so much.

 

[PUSH]

Does Cris Collinsworth have to be on the Olympics coverage team? I already get enough of him during the NFL season.

 

[donaldtoo]

Thanks! We are going to haufbrahaus tomorrow... German beer and food and dancing and beer and food and shot luge. Kinda excited. More excited about the birthday cake that follows! I'm bring a pig and double dipping on the b day cake. Having it tomorrow aaaand again on my actual birthday.


I don't wanna think about what happens after age 39.

That sounds like a blast! Hope you have one!
B-day cake. It's what's for breakfast, lunch, and dinner...!

39? Pssssshhh...mere child's play.

 

[acishere]

I guess NBC cut the Russian Cops singing "Get Lucky." Between this and a clueless Matt Lauer for 3 hours I feel like they are punishing America for keeping them at 4th place in the ratings.

 

[JenniferS]

That sounds like a blast! Hope you have one!
B-day cake. It's what's for breakfast, lunch, and dinner...!

39? Pssssshhh...mere child's play.

Go back further. She's only turning the big 3-0!

 

[donaldtoo]

Go back further. She's only turning the big 3-0!

I know, but look at her post again. She also posted...
"I don't wanna think about what happens after age 39."

 

[JenniferS]

I know, but look at her post again. She also posted...
"I don't wanna think about what happens after age 39."

Yep. Either way, she's a young 'un compared to us!
I liked 30. I wouldn't want to be in my 20's again, but 30 - no problem.

 

[JenniferS]

P. S. You want to know what happens after 39?

Gravity.

 

[donaldtoo]

Yep. Either way, she's a young 'un compared to us!
I liked 30. I wouldn't want to be in my 20's again, but 30 - no problem.

I get that. As long as I knew then what I know now and could go back and do a few things differently along with my same DWifey and kiddos.

 

[donaldtoo]

P. S. You want to know what happens after 39?

Gravity.

Woof! Tell me about it! My man boo...never mind.....

 

[Gabe1]

Yea, I know even with computer models and such, weather's still kinda' a carp shoot (I mean, just one Gary Busey raw steak traf could throw the whole forecast completely outta' whack ), but, it still seems like grandma's bursitis did a better job.

Hee Hee. True, Grandma knows best. Me, my foot that I've broken multiple times now is a a true barometer