MOXOMUMD
Well-Known Member
My father was a darn good man, a SINGLE father that raised FOUR daughters ON HIS OWN. So I stand by my statement that it is not "always the mom" but thanks. When and if you have kids I hope your significant other does his share too or it will always be you.Well, always is a bit of a generalization, in anything, but you can't deny @Songbird76 's point that American men tend to let the mothers take the most active parenting role, be it changing diapers or carrying snacks and such in the parks. It's a trait that has been part of American culture that we seem to have inherited from our British predecessors, the same way we've retained other cultural traits, such as distance from the other person when they talk. In other cultures, they tend to talk very closely together whereas as Americans, we prefer to keep the other person arm's length away. The British are also that way, a trait we share with them.
To be fair as well, gender roles have only begun to change in the past fifty years or so. When my parents were growing up, it was expected that the mother would do much of the job of parenting, changing the diapers and such. The change has been gradual, first with women going out into the workforce and leaving their homes, forcing the men to take a more active roll. Now, men are wanting to take on more responsibility. Years ago, a single father house would be rare, now it's common. Stay at home Dads are becoming more and more common; they were few and far between years and years ago. Men like who are in your family are leading the change, and the women who have them are very fortunate. My dad pushed the stroller, but I know my mom would have loved for him to change a diaper every now and then, or carry the diaper bag.
Songbird was obviously referring to her own experiences having been a part of two different cultures with the attitudes towards men in the family. Her experiences here were different than in the Netherlands, and your experiences here have been different than hers. It doesn't make either one of your experiences invalid just because they differ. She didn't mean to invalidate your own with the word "always". It's the internet; we try our best, but I don't know about you, but my English isn't 100% correct all of the time, so I don't correct others.
But then again some in this thread shouldn't be judgmental to young mothers who have older boyfriends that adore their girlfriend's children either.
on my arm. Once I realized it was just a strand of hair, I calmed down.
He can't cope when I freak out--I must always be cool, calm and collected for him. 
