Poll: Adult Trips to WDW.

[DisAl]

We went for a full week for both our 35th and 40th anniversary, and plan to do it again next January for our 45th. FYI, we are taking the whole family (four generations from the 3 year old grandson to my (then) 89 year old mother) this June. While we love taking the family it is a TOTALLY different trip with just the two of us. and we had a wonderful time.
When we were there on our 35th anniversary trip our then 23 year old daughter told one of her co-workers that her family was torturing her. Shocked, the co-worker asked what was wrong. Daughter replied "My parents are at Disney World and they keep sending me pictures! Guilty......

 

[Dave B]

We are doing our first one this May for my wife's bday, forest time on any trip without the kids in almost 12 years, but it does feel a little weird, I will be honest

 

[jaklgreen]

We will see because contrary to recent generations this is an old situation, It is not, enough has not gone by yet to know if it will cause some people problems later in life. Just because you don't think so, doesn't make it anymore true then my saying that it will. Enough time has not passed to figure it out. I just personally, cannot wrap my head around why people feel that they have to get "away" from their children. It just seem completely self involved to me. Do as you please, it was just my opinion, time will tell.

People "get away" as you put it, from their kids all the time for various reasons. Some have to travel for work, some are in the military and are sent away, some are divorced and get a job in another city. Children adjust to life and are not scarred for it. BTW, my 15 and 16 year old read this thread and laughed at the response that they could somehow be "harmed" because I go to WDW without them. I am not saying we are perfect, but we are a far cry from anything close to dysfunctional for having gone on vacation. So I want to ask you, if it is so bad for families to be separated, how about those kids that go to sleep away summer camp? That is them going on vacation without their parents. Are all of those kids messed up because they were away from their parents for a week?

 

[Goofyernmost]

People "get away" as you put it, from their kids all the time for various reasons. Some have to travel for work, some are in the military and are sent away, some are divorced and get a job in another city. Children adjust to life and are not scarred for it. BTW, my 15 and 16 year old read this thread and laughed at the response that they could somehow be "harmed" because I go to WDW without them. I am not saying we are perfect, but we are a far cry from anything close to dysfunctional for having gone on vacation. So I want to ask you, if it is so bad for families to be separated, how about those kids that go to sleep away summer camp? That is them going on vacation without their parents. Are all of those kids messed up because they were away from their parents for a week?

There is a difference between have too and stay away from me kid. There are adult situations that I couldn't bring the kids too, but, we were talking about going to a place like WDW and even though I, of all people, understand that it isn't just for kids, it is a huge draw for them. I wouldn't have ever gone when they were children without bringing them. That may just be me, that is the way it was, do as you please. I'm certainly not going to stand at the gate and ask where the kids are. Your choice, but, I am a believer that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Someone else had that theory as well. Also, your kids are teenagers, I assumed we were talking about the range between 4 and 12. Just to be aware, my wife had severe reactions to how she was treated (non-physical abuse) as a child and it didn't manifest itself until she was in her late 40's. Just saying, but, lets agree to disagree on this point. Not every child will have an adverse reaction, but, how does one see, in advance whether ones children will or not? In answer to the question asked. I don't necessarily think it is mean, but, I also think it is filled with risks and hard feelings and a large portion of self absorption.

 

[jaklgreen]

There is a difference between have too and stay away from me kid. There are adult situations that I couldn't bring the kids too, but, we were talking about going to a place like WDW and even though I, of all people, understand that it isn't just for kids, it is a huge draw for them. I wouldn't have ever gone when they were children without bringing them. That may just be me, that that is the way it was, do as you please. I'm certainly not going to stand at the gate and ask where the kids are. Your choice, but, I am a believer that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Someone else had that theory as well. Also, your kids are teenagers, I assumed we were talking about the range between 4 and 12. Just to be aware, my wife had severe reactions to how she was treated (non-physical abuse) as a child and it didn't manifest itself until she was in here late 40's. Just saying, but, lets agree to disagree on this point. Not every child will have an adverse reaction, but, how does one see, in advance whether ones children will or not? In answer to the question asked. I don't necessarily think it is mean, but, I also think it is filled with risks and hard feelings and a large portion of self absorption.

So is it specifically that the parents are going to WDW now? Or just that they go on vacation without the kids? If the parents to go to let's say Vegas, that is better because the child will not want to go there? I guess I don't understand your theory. I get what you are saying about horrible parents, I personally had horrible parents. But part of being a good parent is also keeping yourself happy. And if going on vacation to WDW, either alone or with your spouse makes you happy, then that will benefit the children.

 

[wendysue]

First off, 10 year olds think anything that they want and don't get makes their parents mean. Trust me when I tell you that Moms from generations past could have cared less that their kids thought that they were mean. Second, just because you have children does not mean that you are slaves to them and do not have your own life anymore. Especially after the infant stage of their lives. I travel annually without my kids. They know that Mom has her own life too and frankly, I think it is helping my daughters to know that you can be a part of a family and still be true to yourself. I have seen so many people that are unhappy with their lives because they try to be and do too much for others and do not take time for themselves. There is absolutely nothing wrong with going on a vacation with your spouse(or yourself) without the kids. That is what grandparents are for. And do not even think of feeling 1 shred of guilt over it.

Hey....Wait a minute!! We are grandparents that go by ourselves to WDW. We don't take the kids (now grown) OR the grandkids. Actually, we offered to have our kids and grandkids come down with us, but they don't want to. (how weird is that??)

 

[SyracuseDisneyFan]

I don't think so

 

[BuddyThomas]

So glad that I don't have this dilemma. For me, it's an adult trip every time, although I admit that I often behave like an insane 10 year old, so there's that.

 

[Disneyworld_here_we_come]

I'm struggling with this right now. I really want to take an adults only 10 year anniversary trip with the hubby next year BUT I do worry because our 6 (will be 7 then) year old is very clingy. My older kids are not, probably because of age but also because of divorce and are gone every weekend anyways, so it's just the little one I worry about having a hard time with it. I'm half mom who wants to go to Disney without watching a dramatic child fall to the ground cause he's tired of walking, and half mom who doesn't want to break her sons heart because he loves traveling and we don't do it often. At least I've got time to figure it out. But I did answer the question as no because I plan on taking many trips without children in my future.

 

[notslim99]

We are doing our first one this May for my wife's bday, forest time on any trip without the kids in almost 12 years, but it does feel a little weird, I will be honest

Y’all will love it! Be sure to book a “date night” reservation at a nice restaurant. My wife and I love O’Hana or California Grill for dinner.

 

[jimbojones]

I wouldn't do it, personally. My daughters are very young but I expect to travel without them at some point, but it won't be to WDW. WDW is way more fun with the kiddos IMO.

There are many places I would like to travel with just my wife, but none include disney anything. At least half the fun for me is the fun my kids are having. I think I would miss my kids dearly if I was at WDW without them watching all the other families having fun together. If I wanted adults only I'd go to Vegas

 

[jimbojones]

So is it specifically that the parents are going to WDW now? Or just that they go on vacation without the kids? If the parents to go to let's say Vegas, that is better because the child will not want to go there? I guess I don't understand your theory. I get what you are saying about horrible parents, I personally had horrible parents. But part of being a good parent is also keeping yourself happy. And if going on vacation to WDW, either alone or with your spouse makes you happy, then that will benefit the children.

I think both you and Goffyernmost have good points although I tend to agree with goofyer more . I asked myself, if I was 10 and my parents said they were going to disney without me , how would I react. The answer is that I would have been heartbroken, and that is putting it mildly, I would have been absolutely devastated and resentful. If they said they were going to vegas for a weekend alone, I would not have cared at all. In fact,my parents took short trips alone when I was a kid and we happily stayed with our cousins or grandparents for a few days. But they were never going to a kids destination.

But for me, my feelings about my kids mirror those of Goofyernmost, there is only a brief window of time where the kids are old enough to appreciate and remember doing stuff as a family but not so old they no longer want to be with you. I figure you have a 10 or 12 year window between 4 and 14 or so. After that the rest of your life will be spent mostly without your kids. I would not want to waste a WDW trip by leaving them at home. WDW will still be WDW in 10 years, my now little kids won't be little kids in 10 years. I can wait 10 years to go with just my wife again.

Go to vegas, go to a resort in the Bahamas, but don't go to WDW and leave your kids at home. As always just my opinion, in the end we all do what we feel is right for us and our family. But as someone who has lost a child I will suggest that you don't take your kids for granted, incorporate them into as much of your life as you can while you can.

 

[CaptainAmerica]

But part of being a good parent is also keeping yourself happy. And if going on vacation to WDW, either alone or with your spouse makes you happy, then that will benefit the children.

That's not something a ten year old should be expected to understand.

If you REALLY want to go to WDW without your WDW-obsessed kid, I think the only way to do it is to not tell him. Tell him that you and your spouse are going on an adults trip just the two of you, but you don't tell him where.

 

[larandtra]

There is nothing wrong with going to WDW sans kids. All this " they will be damaged" stuff is nothing but typical excuse making. Kids behavior isnt molded by mommy and daddy taking a trip to WDW without them. Geez. Can you think of anything more ridiculous to use as an excuse for poor behavior? If you are good parents at home, show your children love and that respect is mutual, help them learn to make good decisions, arm them witht he ability to stand on their own two feet and have a happy and successful life, support them in their endeavors, etc. You are doing a great job as a parent and much more than most parents are doing these days. Seems more and more they are self absorbed and teach kids the "me" and I "deserve" concepts. Going to WDW on your own as parents is not even close to being a bad thing or a viable "excuse" for how someone acts when they grow up.

 

[Dave B]

So we talked to our kids about going and they actually did not want to miss school, since it is at the end of the school year, I was very impressed, they are really looking forward to staying with Grandma and having a good time, I would NEVER lie to my kids personally

 

[jaklgreen]

There is nothing wrong with going to WDW sans kids. All this " they will be damaged" stuff is nothing but typical excuse making. Kids behavior isnt molded by mommy and daddy taking a trip to WDW without them. Geez. Can you think of anything more ridiculous to use as an excuse for poor behavior? If you are good parents at home, show your children love and that respect is mutual, help them learn to make good decisions, arm them witht he ability to stand on their own two feet and have a happy and successful life, support them in their endeavors, etc. You are doing a great job as a parent and much more than most parents are doing these days. Seems more and more they are self absorbed and teach kids the "me" and I "deserve" concepts. Going to WDW on your own as parents is not even close to being a bad thing or a viable "excuse" for how someone acts when they grow up.

Yes! Thank you. The idea that a child will be scarred for life because they could not go one one of the many Disney trips is ludicrous. I started going solo for the food and wine fest when my kids where around that age( my oldest will be 17 in a couple of weeks). They have been going almost every year of their lives and so them not going with me for my fall trip is a non-issue. They don't feel neglected or unloved because I take this time to do what I like to do. I am with them the rest of the year. I see them every day, we have dinner together every night. I only work when they are in school so we get plenty of family time. A lot of parents do things without their kids throughout the year and leave them with grandparents or sitters and no one says the kids will be traumatized by the parents not taking them out to dinner with them. It is stupid. What is messing kids up is the parents that give the kids the control of the household.

 

[larandtra]

And I would second that I would never lie to my child about going. That teaches them that deception to "spare" someones feelings is ok and sets a terrible precedent. Being honest and ensuring they know why is a much more responsible track.

 

[JIMINYCR]

No, you don't need that. If your bonds are not strong it won't matter where you are or who is with you... you're in trouble.

Yes you start out in marriage with a strong love and bond with/for your spouse but over time, with the stresses of life, work, kids, hardships, hitting you day after day... marriages sometimes start feeling the strain life hands out. Pressures build and even the best relationships start feeling out of whack. Having the opportunity to get away from it all and reconnect with one another, in a setting thats away from the world, can help many relationships. Sure if you dont have a strong bond nothing may be able to save you, especially when one spouse gives up on the other and refuses to try. But a lot of relationships are better off for having time away and finding each other again.

 

[WDW_Jon]

I could not do it

 

[Goofyernmost]

Yes you start out in marriage with a strong love and bond with/for your spouse but over time, with the stresses of life, work, kids, hardships, hitting you day after day... marriages sometimes start feeling the strain life hands out. Pressures build and even the best relationships start feeling out of whack. Having the opportunity to get away from it all and reconnect with one another, in a setting thats away from the world, can help many relationships. Sure if you dont have a strong bond nothing may be able to save you, especially when one spouse gives up on the other and refuses to try. But a lot of relationships are better off for having time away and finding each other again.

Yes, but it doesn't have to be at WDW without the kids. There are multiple places for couples to go to try and re-establish that healthy relationship. The discussion was about going to WDW without the kids, not the idea that a short adult get away isn't a good thing. Again I will repeat, I wouldn't chose a place like Disney to get away from young children. Not that a get away might not help a relationship, but, like so many thing... location, location, location!