i need advice!

[hrmom26]

i am sorry ahead of time for asking this on this forum but i'm not sure where to ask it and i need help i am a disney fanatic i went to disney for the first time in 2004 and i fell in love my kids love it as much if not more. well when i began planning my next trip one of my closest friend asked if i minded if she came along at first i thought it was a geat idea but as the planing progressed i realized it would be a disaster. everything i want to do she doesn't and vis-versa i want to stay in the perfered building at pop century because i have young kids who get tired and i like being close to everything she doesn't want to , i want to visit epcot, the water parks and disney quest , and the lego store she doesn't i have young kids she has a teenager we want very different things out of the vacation also she doesn't even seem to want to talk about the trip to much well i love the planning as much as going well not as much as going there but i love planning it any way. what do i do, should i try to compremize or should i go alone and how do i un-invite her with out messing up the frindship? agian sorry if i affend any one buy asking a question that doesn't derectly involve disney on this forum. has anyone ever had something like this happen to them if so how do you get out of it nicely? p.s. she is a bit of a drama queen so i need to be careful how i tell here also i should add i am afraid if we go together we would end up hating each other by the time we got home.

 

[bhg469]

i say dont worry. they can easily get around without you. Its so easy to go off and do your own thing.

 

[AliciaLuvzDizne]

i am sorry ahead of time for asking this on this forum but i'm not sure where to ask it and i need help i am a disney fanatic i went to disney for the first time in 2004 and i fell in love my kids love it as much if not more. well when i began planning my next trip one of my closest friend asked if i minded if she came along at first i thought it was a geat idea but as the planing progressed i realized it would be a disaster. everything i want to do she doesn't and vis-versa i want to stay in the perfered building at pop century because i have young kids who get tired and i like being close to everything she doesn't want to , i want to visit epcot, the water parks and disney quest , and the lego store she doesn't i have young kids she has a teenager we want very different things out of the vacation also she doesn't even seem to want to talk about the trip to much well i love the planning as much as going well not as much as going there but i love planning it any way. what do i do, should i try to compremize or should i go alone and how do i un-invite her with out messing up the frindship? agian sorry if i affend any one buy asking a question that doesn't derectly involve disney on this forum. has anyone ever had something like this happen to them if so how do you get out of it nicely? p.s. she is a bit of a drama queen so i need to be careful how i tell here also i should add i am afraid if we go together we would end up hating each other by the time we got home.

you dont necesarrily have to un invite... but remind her that this is your trip with your kids and she asked to tag along. then tell her where you will be staying and how much her half will be. even if you dont share a hotel room (which would mean that she can stay in any building you like) you can get together as you please. You do not have to do everything together, but it might be fun to have someone that you know there for various things.

For example...I am going next week with my best friend and her husband. They like universal Islands of Adventure, and I don't because I dont go on too many rollercoasters. They will be going without me. I like Pleasure Island and nightlife, they do not...so I will go without them. We are staying in the same condo, but renting 2 different cars. we know that we dont always have to be together, but we have fun together doing the things we all like to do. Other than that, we have plans to do our own thing.

 

[The Mom]

Sounds like my family reunions!! :lol: We all have different interests, so we mostly just get together for dinner every night. You might suggest a few restaurants, and then get PS for them. Let them know that you will meet them for dinner every night, socialize and talk about your day, and decide if you're going to stay in the parks longer, or go your separate ways again.

You might want to write down a few non-negotiable items, a few negotiable ones, and a few no interest whatsoever ones. This is what we've done in deciding a resort for our family reuniuons. There are several golf fanatics; I couldn't care less. However, with small children (in the past) a pool was a must, along with a full kitchen, and washer and dryer. I like to walk, shop, and tour interesting areas. We also like watersports, which some of the family hate.

We've always been able to find a place that had something, but not everything, for everyone; some have been better than others for us, but all have been tolerable.

WDW definitely has something for everyone, as long as you know that travelling with others ALWAYS involves a little bit of compromise from EVERYONE.

 

[Epcot82Guy]

I agree with everything everyone has said. My suggestion would be to go ahead and plan your trip out. Since you really enjoy doing that, simply tell her that. I would say keep an eye each day to making sure at least half the day is something she would enjoy. Then show her your plan. If there is something she doesn't want to do, she can use that part of the day to repeat something else or do something not on your list that she would like to. Have everyone meet up for a nice meal or something and tell about your day. I think she should understand that, and that will provide everyone with the vacation they want.

 

[mellie882]

The way we always solved it is to do some things together, and then split up later and decide on a meeting time and place. For example, you can all shop on Main Street and enjoy breakfast at the bakery. Then, you go your way and your friend's party goes theirs, knowing that you will meet at the castle for noon for lunch, etc. For my family, it was always nice to meet for food but do attractions separately. Maybe make a few reservations to give the trip some structure.

 

[mwc1996]

When we went last year we invited both my parents and my In-laws. My in laws had to back out so we had to change some of the plans a few months out. Since it was our vacation, I did the planning, made the reservations, bought the park and airline tickets, everything. I then let my parents know what our plans were. If they wanted to join us they could and if they didn't they could do what they wanted. They split from us almost everyday for a little bit which was fine with everyone. Everyone had a blast. Don't feel like because you invited your friend that she has to spend every waking second with you. There is so much to do that there no way you could do everything that everyone wants to do. Split up some and everyone will have a good time.

 

[Pixiedust1393]

Well- I think since it is your trip, do what you want to do, and stay where you want to stay... Just tell her about your kids, how they get tired and everything... She doesn't have to stay at the same resort you do, you guys can meet up in the park or watch fireworks together or something.... Don't worry about it! :wave:

 

[Dizknee_Phreek]

Wow, sounds like when I took one of my friends. All she wanted to do was rest and lay by the pool. Then she ended up losing her park ticket (which my parents bought her) and her camera (which her aunt had just bought her for graduation). Anytime I asked her if she wanted to do something she'd always say "well, if you want to do it, I guess I will." I got a pretty good fill of her during that week. *sigh* You know the last time I saw/spoke to her? The midnight showing of The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King - and that was only because she was working at the theater I went to.

Anyway, back to you. Since your friend is an adult and not a teen (like my friend was, at the time), I'd say you could still let her go and do what she wants to do, while you and your kids go do what you want to do. That way you're not stepping on anyone's toes, and you still get to have the magical vacation that you want. Maybe you can find something that you and your friend want to do - playing mini golf, eating at a certain restaurant, etc. and do that, then go your seperate ways again. So she wants to stay at a different complex than you; so let her...just because she doesn't want to stay in the same complex you do, doesn't mean you can't stay there. Just because she wants to tag along doesn't mean she has to be your shadow, ya know? Remember - this is YOUR vacation first and foremost. If you have to, remind HER of that. YOU were the one to get the ball rolling in the first place. And I think it's pretty safe to say you and your family would be going with or without her. So, if it were me in your situation, I'd plan how I want to plan (esp. since she doesn't seem extremely interesting in the planning process anyway), stay in whatever building I wanted to stay in, plan to do whatever I wanted to do. If she wanted to follow your lead, great; if she doesn't, fine; if she gets upset and decides not to go, that's her problem. That's just the way I see it Good luck!

 

[snoopi_grl]

My friend and I went to Disneyland together and we had a blast! Even though she is my best friend, one of us didn't like one ride or the other didn't like another one... When we went, things actually worked out fine. You got ur kids and ur friend, you might as well just give it a shot going with her and her teen... it might turn out to be a really fun vacation!

 

[dvcnut39]

First of all, welcome to our nightmare. All we every do is think about WDW. 2nd, travel with your friend, but let her know that once you hit WDW, you are going to do this and that. Period! If she wants to happily join you, great! If not, tell her to enjoy herself and you'll see her on the plane.

 

[CAPTAIN HOOK]

I think you have two real choices - go with her family but do your own things in the parks and meet up at night, or, let her down politely and go to WDW by yourself

 

[GenerationX]

Since you were the one who was originally planning to go to WDW and she just asked if she could tag along, you have more room to move. Tell her you've decided that your family would like to stay at Pop, and she's more than welcome to join you there. Tell her which parks you've decided to visit, and if she also wants to accompany you there, great, you can tour together.

It's your vacation and it's a lot of money ... I wouldn't be willing to make too many compromises at all.

 

[Kadee]

I think everyone is pretty much "on the mark" with this one.


Plain and simple: Plan YOUR vacation...stay where YOU want, go where YOU want. Write it all down and give it to her. Tell her, "These are MY plans; you may plan accordingly if you wish." I assume since you are staying at the Pop that you are not sharing rooms since only 4 people max can stay in one room. So you getting a preferred building and her not getting one should not be a problem.