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Favorite Jungle Cruise Jokes
- Thread starter RSoxNo1
- Start date
TheOneVader
Well-Known Member
Probably already been posted, but I like thsi one:
"And now we bring you back to the Magic Kingdom, where dreams come true... Unless you dream of cheap food and short queues."
"And now we bring you back to the Magic Kingdom, where dreams come true... Unless you dream of cheap food and short queues."
orleans97
Member
Mine were on an expendition with a phenomenal skipper: all jokes seemed to be timed right and he pushed them perfectly.
That is a 64 impala, man those are rare. :lion roars: yes folks it has a hemi.
Turn corner to tribesman :black skipper: hey look my family reunion, and goes on to tell more jokes of his crazy hunting uncle.
Or Becky with the great tale of, "Hey folks, with 4 years of college and a degree you can also be a jungle skipper like me. My parents are so happy."
Tons more but those are unique enough to stand out.
That is a 64 impala, man those are rare. :lion roars: yes folks it has a hemi.
Turn corner to tribesman :black skipper: hey look my family reunion, and goes on to tell more jokes of his crazy hunting uncle.
Or Becky with the great tale of, "Hey folks, with 4 years of college and a degree you can also be a jungle skipper like me. My parents are so happy."
Tons more but those are unique enough to stand out.
Sorry to bring back one of my old threads, but I was reminded of some more favorite lines from my trip over thanksgiving:
At the backside of water: (shines flashlight on the water) Ladies and Gentleman... FANTASMIC!
At Chief Nami: Chief Nami just got fire from his job at TGI Fridays...
At the backside of water: (shines flashlight on the water) Ladies and Gentleman... FANTASMIC!
At Chief Nami: Chief Nami just got fire from his job at TGI Fridays...
bradandsarabr
Member
Q: what kind of snake is that??? A hint, it starts with the letter "P."
A: No . . . it's "plastic."
A: No . . . it's "plastic."
Skipper Dan
Active Member
Please forgive me if someone has already posted this, as I was lazy, and skipped through most of this forum. :hammer:
One of my last trips, me and my brother were on the Jungle Cruise, and as we pulled into the dock, the skipper said, "Alright everybody, I hope you enjoyed your ride. If you did I'm Jennifer, and this is the Jungle Cruise. If you didn't my names Tom, and this is Space Mountain. Have a great day, and please don't watch your step." :ROFLOL:
One of my last trips, me and my brother were on the Jungle Cruise, and as we pulled into the dock, the skipper said, "Alright everybody, I hope you enjoyed your ride. If you did I'm Jennifer, and this is the Jungle Cruise. If you didn't my names Tom, and this is Space Mountain. Have a great day, and please don't watch your step." :ROFLOL:
Mansion Butler
Active Member
Looks at Chief Nami and shakes head.
"Mary Poppins, you've really let yourself go."
------
"I'd like to take this opportunity to point out some of my favorite plants on the Jungle Cruise."
"There's one."
"There's one."
-----
Most I ever laughed was when my friend randomly pulled out his gun, shot out into the woods, and said, "I love monkeys."
"Mary Poppins, you've really let yourself go."
------
"I'd like to take this opportunity to point out some of my favorite plants on the Jungle Cruise."
"There's one."
"There's one."
-----
Most I ever laughed was when my friend randomly pulled out his gun, shot out into the woods, and said, "I love monkeys."
Launchpad
Account Suspended
"I will use my psychic powers to make this hippo go away."
[Raises hand at hippos direction and it sinks back down]
"Speaking of psychic powers. I have a joke for all of you that can read minds. Ready?"
[Pause as people laugh]
"Pretty hilarious isn't it?"
___________________
"Rides over. Get out. I'm sorry. Where was my Disney hospitality? Get out and have a magical day."
[Raises hand at hippos direction and it sinks back down]
"Speaking of psychic powers. I have a joke for all of you that can read minds. Ready?"
[Pause as people laugh]
"Pretty hilarious isn't it?"
___________________
"Rides over. Get out. I'm sorry. Where was my Disney hospitality? Get out and have a magical day."
Rob562
Well-Known Member
I think the all-time jaw-dropping "I can't believe he said that" joke I ever heard on the Jungle Cruise was set up like this:
It was approaching the abandoned camp (the one with the gorillas, I guess) he set up with something like
"Now we're going to stop in and visit the camp of a friendly group of locals from the Fugowee tribe."
At first we thought he'd just let that sit and let people finish it in their head, but sure enough we turned the corner, the skipper turned around, saw the empty camp and called out "Hey! Where're the Fugowee??"
My former-CM friend and I looked at each other and our jaws just about dropped...
Then we laughed. :lol: Of course I think there was ONE kid in the entire boat, and she was about 3 or 4, so it went WAY over her head...
(and for those having pronunciation problems, that was pronounced Fug-ow-ee...)
-Rob
It was approaching the abandoned camp (the one with the gorillas, I guess) he set up with something like
"Now we're going to stop in and visit the camp of a friendly group of locals from the Fugowee tribe."
At first we thought he'd just let that sit and let people finish it in their head, but sure enough we turned the corner, the skipper turned around, saw the empty camp and called out "Hey! Where're the Fugowee??"
My former-CM friend and I looked at each other and our jaws just about dropped...
Then we laughed. :lol: Of course I think there was ONE kid in the entire boat, and she was about 3 or 4, so it went WAY over her head...(and for those having pronunciation problems, that was pronounced Fug-ow-ee...)
-Rob
JungleSkip
New Member
(in reference to the lions surrounding the zebra) Theres the first law of the jungle survival of the fittest, as shown by the pride of lions protecting the sleeping zebra
crew laughs
...I"m just kidding kids.....he's dead.
crew laughs
...I"m just kidding kids.....he's dead.
iheartdisney91
Well-Known Member
ok here's a funny quote!
" oh he is having a wonderful sale tonight. he's willing to trade one of his heads for..(she banged her foot on the ground and flickered the lights) one of yours!!"
it was soooo funny omg i loved her, she made little kids cry lol:ROFLOL: oh not that i dont like kids lol
" oh he is having a wonderful sale tonight. he's willing to trade one of his heads for..(she banged her foot on the ground and flickered the lights) one of yours!!"
it was soooo funny omg i loved her, she made little kids cry lol:ROFLOL: oh not that i dont like kids lol