I just remembered the California Adventure Country Bears show I came up with for a project in Season 3 of "One Little Spark" -
California Bear Jamboree. Might as well post it here (complete with concept art)...
n the Forests of Imagination, there lives a very large population of black bears. Big bears, small bears, fat bears, skinny bears, brown-furred bears*, black-furred bears, white-furred bears, all sorts of bears. And as anybody who's been to Walt Disney World knows, there's nothing that bears like better than gathering together for a good old fashioned musical jamboree. And you're in luck - today, the bears are putting on a show as a tribute to their home turf of California!
The show takes place in the majestic Redwood Lodge, so named for its being built almost entirely of redwood. Similar but not identical to Florida's Country Bear Hall, once one steps inside the building they'll find themselves in a cozy lobby decorated with portraits of the attraction's characters... and the occasional claw marks. Sitting in the center of the lobby is a fireplace. Sitting on the fireplace mantle is a mounted fish. This is Diego, a Yellowtail Rockfish with a Spanish accent who talks to guests while they're waiting for the show to begin. Diego often complains that it gets so boring sitting on the mantle in the lobby and how he longs to return to Lake Cachuma, where he was born. And when he's not complaining, he's telling tales of his adventures in the various lakes and rivers all over California... most of which are clearly made up.
Eventually, the doors on the northern side of the room open up, and we're allowed entry into the theater. As we take our seats, we take notice of the large stage in front of us. On either side of the stage is a smaller stage. Each stage is fronted by a red curtain. And over our heads is a makeshift chandelier crafted out of lanterns hanging from antlers. Once everyone is seated, a cast member presses a button that sets the show into motion.
Hanging on the right wall of the theater are three mounted animal heads who suddenly spring to life. It's none other than Max, Buff, and Melvin, a trio familiar to any fans of the Country Bear Jamboree. As Melvin wakes up with a yawn, Buff complains,
"Some California vacation THIS is. We've been hung up here in this theater since we got here!" "Keep your horns on, Buff. We promised Henry we'd stop by his cousin's show," Max points out.
"It's the least we could do." "Yeah," Melvin adds.
"But, uh, after the show, could we do a little sightseeing? I was hopin' to meet a movie star or two." Peering down at the audience, Buff says,
"Maybe there's one in the audience."
Eventually, a piano-played instrumental of "California Girls" begins to play as a large wood-paneled piano rises into view in front of the curtain on stage. Seated at the piano is a black bear wearing a cowboy hat and a neckerchief, tickling the ivories. This bear is named Frankie, and he's Henry's cousin and the host of the show.
"Howdy, folks!" he greets us.
"Welcome to our show. Here at Redwood Lodge, we're putting on a musical salute to this big ol' state of ours. Where the sun is always shining, a good actor can become a great governor, and you can't run any farther without getting wet... uh, whatever that means. But enough of my yammerin', let's get the show started with a song from the coolest bruins this side of the Golden Gate Bridge... the Beach Bears!"
The curtain on the main stage opens up, revealing a band of bears in front of a mural depicting the beach. The show's answer to the Five Bear Rugs, The Beach Bears are a rock band inspired by (obviously) the Beach Boys. The band consists of...
- Chase, the leader of the band. He has light brown (practically blonde) fur, wears blue swim trunks, and plays the guitar. He's also the band's lead singer.
- Dean, a pudgy grey-furred bear in a wetsuit who plays a guitar that he made out of an old surfboard.
- Julian, a laid-back bongo-playing bear with a moptop that covers his eyes, tie-dye swim trunks, and sandals. Not much riles up Julian. His motto is "Go with the flow... especially if it's headed for the beach."
- Parker, a muscular black-furred bear with sunglasses who plays the drums. When not performing, Parker enjoys working out, working on his tan, and impressing girl bears at the beach. He's actually quite humble, but not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.
- Sunny, the oddball of the bunch who's always wearing scuba gear even if he's not underwater. He plays the keyboard.
- Rocky, Chase's pet lobster and the only member of the band who isn't a bear. He doesn't play an instrument, he's just the band's mascot.
The Beach Bears perform "Surfin' U.S.A." with Frankie, then the curtains close and Frankie sinks back down into the stage. A car horn can be heard honking, immediately followed by a loud crash. The curtains on the smaller stage on the left open up, revealing that a Woodie (that's a type of station wagon for those unaware) has somehow driven through the theater's back wall. Seated in the Woodie are two bears, our next performers - husband and wife Bernie and Donna Bruin. Donna insists that they should've asked for directions. Bernie insists that their map and his instincts are all that they need to get to San Diego. The two argue in song, performing a rendition of "I've Been Everywhere" - or rather, "
We've Been Everywhere", listing the various misadventures that they've gotten into on their travels. Eventually, the curtains close as the Bruins continue bickering with each other.
Frankie reappears on the smaller stage on the right, introducing the next performer, Farmer Orson. Orson is a stout bear in overalls and a straw hat with fur a very orange-y shade of brown. He holds a basket of fresh oranges from his farm, and on either side of him on the stage is a beehive. In addition to his fruits and vegetables, Orson also raises bees, and his bees fly in and out of the hives and fly around him as he sings, buzzing along to the music. He sings "Good Day Sunshine".
On the left stage, the curtains part to reveal a bear in a prison cell! The new performer is Furry Fritz, who could've become a famous guitar player had it not been for the fact that he's currently imprisoned in Alcatraz for robbing several banks). Dressed in striped prison clothes, Fritz performs "Jailhouse Rock".
The curtain closes on Fritz, and Frankie introduces Ursula Major. Ursula is a bear who believes in "flower power" - in other words, someone who'd probably feel more at home in the 1960s. With her literal rose-colored glasses, flower-patterned clothes, and trusty guitar, Ursula sings "San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Flowers in Your Hair)" as colorful flowers rise up behind her.
Then the sound of a hornpipe fills the air as a grizzled sailor bear takes the stage. Say "ahoy" to Captain Bluster, a salty old bear in a sailor's cap and boots, a long furry beard framing his face. Accompanying him is his faithful sidekick, Joe, a seagull who perches on the bear's shoulder and makes wisecracks. Captain Bluster sings a sea shanty to the tune of "What Should We Do With a Drunken Sailor" about the strange things he's encountered on his way to California - sea serpents and merbears and a sea lion the size of an elephant? Max, Buff, and Melvin are skeptical, but Captain Bluster insists that he's telling the truth. What do YOU think?
After Captain Bluster's performance, the Beach Bears take the stage again and join Frankie for a performance of "Fun, Fun, Fun". About halfway through, however, the song is interrupted by a female bear with a camera running onto the stage.
"Oh my gosh! The Beach Bears!" she exclaims before snapping a photo of them. This is Gaga Gigi, whose main character trait is that she's an obsessive fangirl over anybody who happens to be famous. She sings a song as well, a version of "I Love LA" where she lists various celebrities that she'd love to meet. Eventually, Frankie gets rid of her by opening a trapdoor under her feet.
The next performer is No Job Jake, a shabby-looking hobo bear in tattered clothes carrying a knapsack over his shoulder. He is accompanied by Zephyr, a tortoise who plays the harmonica as Jake sings a song to the tune of "I've Been Working on the Railroad" about their misadventures riding the rails on the California Zephyr. After the song, he says,
"Y'know, this sure is a nice theater... could me and Zephyr move in?"
A group of bears in leather jackets ride into the theater on motorcycles. Frankie introduces them as The Fearsome Furballs - leader Eddie the Teddy, Aloysius the Ferocious, Izzy the Grizzly, Harold the Feral, and Ashley the Nasty. They're a group of juvenile delinquents, but they're also really good singers, as proven by their performance of "California Sun".
Hailing from Yosemite is the next performer, Fuzzy Wuzzy. When he first appears on stage, Fuzzy might scare the pants off of you - he's a gigantic bruin, the largest bear in the show, with tiny red eyes, a mouthful of sharp teeth, inky black fur, and long claws. But there's no need to be afraid of Fuzzy - he wouldn't hurt a fly. Playing a fiddle, he sings a song about his cave back in Yosemite to the tune of "On Top of Old Smokey".
Finally, Frankie enlists the help of the Beach Bears, Bernie and Donna, Farmer Orson, Ursula Major, No Job Jake, and Fuzzy Wuzzy in capping off the show with "California, Here I Come". Throughout the song, images of various California landmarks are projected on the walls. Of course, once they've finished the song, Gaga Gigi climbs out of the trapdoor and chases the Beach Bears away begging for their phone numbers. Frankie shrugs -
"Just a usual day for big name bears in California!" he tells us.
With that, the show comes to a close. Guests are ushered out of the theater and into - you guessed it - a gift shop.
Farmer Orson's Market boasts an impressive supply of souvenirs, as well as fresh fruits and vegetables from Farmer Orson's farm.
LIST OF SONGS:
- "California Girls" (instrumental)
- "Surfin' USA" - Frankie, The Beach Bears
- "We've Been Everywhere" - Bernie and Donna Bruin
- "Good Day Sunshine" - Farmer Orson
- "Jailhouse Rock" - Furry Fritz
- "San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Flowers in Your Hair)" - Ursula Major
- "Captain Bluster's Sea Shanty" - Captain Bluster, Joe, Max, Buff, Melvin
- "Fun, Fun, Fun" - Frankie, The Beach Bears
- "I Love LA" - Gaga Gigi
- "I've Been Ridin' on the Railroad" - No Job Jake
- "California Sun" - The Fearsome Furballs
- "On Top of Old Smokey" - Fuzzy Wuzzy
- "California, Here I Come" - Frankie, The Beach Bears, Bernie and Donna Bruin, Farmer Orson, Ursula Major, No Job Jake, Fuzzy Wuzzy, Max, Buff, Melvin
* Despite their name, black bears can actually come in brown, white, and blue-gray.
) attached. I’d really appreciate it if you kept your posts on topic to the thread, and at least try to connect your songs to the individual bears!