Hoop Dee Doo for sure. Easily the best dinner show on property, and in fact, probably in the Orlando area. Great show (even with the recent revisions), always an energetic cast, and just a really good time. Plus who can argue with unlimited booze? I visit 5-6 times a year, and always see this show once. If you don't mind eating late, the 9:30 show can be a great bargain if you've got Tables in Wonderland.
Backyard BBQ is entertaining enough, but it's definitely geared towards yonger kids (not sure if you have kids in your group or not). I don't think a group of just adults would enjoy it (as they would the Hoop Dee Doo).
I'd stay away from the Spirit of Aloha show, which is interminably awful. The fire dancing is fun, but that occurs near the end, and the first 30 minutes of that show are unwatchable. The food is mediocre at best.