Tips for parents of children scared of rides

[kshiban]

Hi, anyone out there have advice for those of us with kids who are scared of rides?
Background: I have 2 boys (5 and 8). We are surprising them with a Disney trip at the end of February. Somehow the subject of DW came up (I don't plan on telling them about planned trip until last minute) and my oldest says, "I don't think I want to go to DW because the rides are too scary." WHAT?!? He was there once when he was 5 and had a really bad experience on Stitch's great escape. He was anxious about all rides from that point on. We still managed to have a good time.

My concern is now...well, 1) he is 3 years older. In every other aspect of his life, he isn't the scared-easily kind of kid. It is sooo unlike him. If he would just give rides he is scared of a chance, I know he'd love them! 2) My younger son ALWAYS follows his lead. So if he is scared, the youngest will undoubtedly be as well. 3) WDW is a lot of freakin money to be spending our time trying to convince our 8 year old that there is nothing scary about Peter Pan.

Any tips? thanks in advance!

 

[Hakunamatata]

Watch the planning DVD and youtubes of rides he liked. Stitch prob won't even be open so play that up. Focus on the fun.

 

[rob0519]

Start small. Tea Cups, Winnie the Pooh, Peter Pan, then Dumbo or the Magic Carpets. That strategy worked well for my 7 year old nephew at a Six Flags. You may have to ride with them a few times until they feel safe.

 

[21stamps]

Bribe.

I'm half joking. Talk to him, tell him you know that he'll like it. That you would never put him in a position that would hurt him, and that a person must try something to know if they will or will not like it. You know that's he's brave..etc etc.

I'm not a fan of watching YouTube videos because I think it takes away from the experience and the surprise that someone should have the first time. If they are heavily encouraged to try, and spoken to in an understandable way, then they should be able to at least try something once.
If all else fails- bribe him with ice cream or a souvenir as a reward for his bravery.
If that fails- tell him that he doesn't have a choice.lol.
If he goes on a ride and doesn't like it then at least you know not to do it again. More likely though, he'll surprise himself and enjoy it.

Did he go on any rides when he was 5?

 

[Nemo14]

Some kids don't like rides, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I really hate to see parents forcing their crying child to "try it once". Every child is different and if the price of a trip is the motivation for forcing a child to ride a stupid ride, then I think it might be time to take a step back and take a good look at your priorities.

 

[kshiban]

Bribe.

I'm half joking. Talk to him, tell him you know that he'll like it. That you would never put him in a position that would hurt him, and that a person must try something to know if they will or will not like it. You know that's he's brave..etc etc.

I'm not a fan of watching YouTube videos because I think it takes away from the experience and the surprise that someone should have the first time. If they are heavily encouraged to try, and spoken to in an understandable way, then they should be able to at least try something once.
If all else fails- bribe him with ice cream or a souvenir as a reward for his bravery.
If that fails- tell him that he doesn't have a choice.lol.
If he goes on a ride and doesn't like it then at least you know not to do it again. More likely though, he'll surprise himself and enjoy it.

Did he go on any rides when he was 5?

He did! He was scared of anything dark, so pirates, Peter Pan, etc... once we talked him into it he was fine....with the exception of pirates. However, each rode took constant encouragement (sometimes up to an hour or more) to get him on. Of course, we will do that this trip. I honestly was just really hoping to have a trip where I didn't feel like I was coercing/bribing (or fighting) the whole time.

 

[DisneyPrincess5]

If you haven't already, I would calmly probe him a bit and try to get to the bottom of what he feels scares him regarding the rides. Loss of control, being trapped, darkness, not knowing what's coming next, etc. For example, I have some claustrophobia issues and would never ride Stitch for that reason. Maybe being locked in around the head or neck (which is not typical of other rides he'd experience at Disney) is what freaked him out. Whatever happened on Stitch sounds like he's attaching that schema to all rides-"If that ride was scary, all rides are scary".
Just understanding why may help and then you can work with that.

Also, not sure where you live or when you're going but it may help to try and visit a fair or other type of place where he can chose or not to ride something before the trip if that is possible Basically, give him the chance to face what creates anxiety at a smaller scale if he chooses.

If he just refuses, let him refuse. You can't have an 8 year old be highly anxious about something as trivial as rides. Going to school, going to the doctor, getting in the car are all things that need to happen, but rides? Not so much. Don't fight it, let him have some autonomy in that way.

 

[21stamps]

He did! He was scared of anything dark, so pirates, Peter Pan, etc... once we talked him into it he was fine....with the exception of pirates. However, each rode took constant encouragement (sometimes up to an hour or more) to get him on. Of course, we will do that this trip. I honestly was just really hoping to have a trip where I didn't feel like I was coercing/bribing (or fighting) the whole time.

I wonder if it could just be a "scared of the dark" type of thing?
Maybe he won't be that way now that he is older. If you live up north it may be hard to find an amusement park open before February, but some museums have the small capsule rides, maybe you could try one of those?

If I put myself in your situation I would definitely have talks with him first..maybe do the reveal a little earlier than planned? (At Least before you're in a cancellation penalty phase).
I'd probably talk to his pediatrician too, they usually have great advice. Do you guys have friends or family that visit WDW regularly? Maybe if his friends or even adults talk about certain things with excitement it may help him realize that all of these things are "fun".

The closest example I can personally give is this past summer we were at an amusement park. My 6 year old has been waiting to reach a height limit to do a certain ride. After waiting in line and getting in our seats (harnessed in)..he chickened out. As in "I don't want to do this. Please mommy please have them lift my harness. I don't want to do this!!"
I was shocked. I told him he would be fine. The ride operator came to check our restraints, my son started crying. So I asked them to let us out.
We got off the ride and sat there and watched everyone else. I talked to him while watching, he would say that he would go, then say "no. It's too scary". Then a little boy, maybe a year older than my son, was passing by to get in line. I asked him if it was his first time going on, he said - "No way! I love Drop Tower! It's my favorite ride here!" I looked at my son and said, "did you hear that?" He talked to the boy for a moment and then we got in line with them. We finished the ride and the little boy asked my son if he wanted to go again. My kid said "Yes! That was AWESOME!!" The boy's dad and myself followed them to get back in line, my son looked at me and said "Mommy, you don't need to go on with me. Why don't you just sit and watch." ?!?!??!?!? Not even 30 minutes ago he was crying that he didn't want to do it!!
They ended up going on 5 consecutive times together. It was adorable.

Goid luck with your situation. You know your kids better than any of us. Some people will say you shouldn't coax or force..Others will say that they should at least try something once. That's such a personal parenting decision one way or the other. I definitely agree with you that you don't want to be bribing/coaxing/forcing the whole time. Bring in back ups.. it takes a village right? . In my case a stranger got thru to my son more than I was as the mother.lol

 

[hanwill]

I would review the rides that he remembers as fun! And talk up the other rides.. maybe watch the planning videos... they make it look like so much fun! Talk up the parades, characters, etc...whatever he thought was fun before....

 

[kshiban]

If you haven't already, I would calmly probe him a bit and try to get to the bottom of what he feels scares him regarding the rides. Loss of control, being trapped, darkness, not knowing what's coming next, etc. For example, I have some claustrophobia issues and would never ride Stitch for that reason. Maybe being locked in around the head or neck (which is not typical of other rides he'd experience at Disney) is what freaked him out. Whatever happened on Stitch sounds like he's attaching that schema to all rides-"If that ride was scary, all rides are scary".
Just understanding why may help and then you can work with that.

Also, not sure where you live or when you're going but it may help to try and visit a fair or other type of place where he can chose or not to ride something before the trip if that is possible Basically, give him the chance to face what creates anxiety at a smaller scale if he chooses.

If he just refuses, let him refuse. You can't have an 8 year old be highly anxious about something as trivial as rides. Going to school, going to the doctor, getting in the car are all things that need to happen, but rides? Not so much. Don't fight it, let him have some autonomy in that way.

Unfortunately, living in the northeast, we don't have any fairs near us before February. That is an awesome idea, though. I just need to remember that this is supposed to be FUN! Anything that takes away from that fun is not worth fighting over. In the end, you are right...if he refuses, he refuses. I just know how much I loved these rides as a kid (still do). I want him to have these amazing experiences too.

 

[kshiban]

I wonder if it could just be a "scared of the dark" type of thing?
Maybe he won't be that way now that he is older. If you live up north it may be hard to find an amusement park open before February, but some museums have the small capsule rides, maybe you could try one of those?

If I put myself in your situation I would definitely have talks with him first..maybe do the reveal a little earlier than planned? (At Least before you're in a cancellation penalty phase).
I'd probably talk to his pediatrician too, they usually have great advice. Do you guys have friends or family that visit WDW regularly? Maybe if his friends or even adults talk about certain things with excitement it may help him realize that all of these things are "fun".

The closest example I can personally give is this past summer we were at an amusement park. My 6 year old has been waiting to reach a height limit to do a certain ride. After waiting in line and getting in our seats (harnessed in)..he chickened out. As in "I don't want to do this. Please mommy please have them lift my harness. I don't want to do this!!"
I was shocked. I told him he would be fine. The ride operator came to check our restraints, my son started crying. So I asked them to let us out.
We got off the ride and sat there and watched everyone else. I talked to him while watching, he would say that he would go, then say "no. It's too scary". Then a little boy, maybe a year older than my son, was passing by to get in line. I asked him if it was his first time going on, he said - "No way! I love Drop Tower! It's my favorite ride here!" I looked at my son and said, "did you hear that?" He talked to the boy for a moment and then we got in line with them. We finished the ride and the little boy asked my son if he wanted to go again. My kid said "Yes! That was AWESOME!!" The boy's dad and myself followed them to get back in line, my son looked at me and said "Mommy, you don't need to go on with me. Why don't you just sit and watch." ?!?!??!?!? Not even 30 minutes ago he was crying that he didn't want to do it!!
They ended up going on 5 consecutive times together. It was adorable.

Goid luck with your situation. You know your kids better than any of us. Some people will say you shouldn't coax or force..Others will say that they should at least try something once. That's such a personal parenting decision one way or the other. I definitely agree with you that you don't want to be bribing/coaxing/forcing the whole time. Bring in back ups.. it takes a village right? . In my case a stranger got thru to my son more than I was as the mother.lol

LOVE that story about your son! I will have my husband and my parents there as back up. Hopefully one of us can get to him without him feeling pressured. I happened to leave out our "Disney World for kids" book to get him looking through that on his own terms. Thanks!

 

[Kristamouse]

I am a mother to 6 Disney loving kids. I completely and respectfully disagree with the above poster on making your kids try the ride once. We have put our kids on rides when they were old enough and tall enough despite their precieved fear of said ride. We have had kids a bit apprehensive of Haunted Manison, Pirates, Rock and Roller Coster and Tower of Terror. We told each child they had to ride once and then could choose not to ride in the future. Every single time and every single kid has enjoyed the experience. They exited the ride happy and proud they conquered a fear.
Now I did't make my huge 3yo (in size 5 clothing) ride Dinosaur even though he was tall enough. Dinosaur, in my opinion, be scary for that age group. He happily played while my hubs and older kids rode. We did, however, make our 6yo ride Space Mountain. He had been on Thunder Mountain and Everest and was starting to get anxious because he would not sit next to us but behind or infront of us. He got a pep talk from us and a helpful CM. Our son rode 3 more times that day and many more after that and is a huge Space Mtn fan.
If you child has an establish fear of heights than TOT is not the ride for them. But if your child is just uneasy because it is a new experience than get them on the ride. My guess is that they will enjoy.
At the end of the day you know your child better than any of us and need to adjust any decision for them personally.
Enjoy your trip

 

[kshiban]

I am a mother to 6 Disney loving kids. I completely and respectfully disagree with the above poster on making your kids try the ride once. We have put our kids on rides when they were old enough and tall enough despite their precieved fear of said ride. Every single time and every single kid has enjoyed the experience.
Now I did't make my huge 3yo (in size 5 clothing) ride Dinosaur because that could, in my opinion, be scary for that age group. I did make my 6yo ride Space Mountian and he rode is 3 more times that day and many more after that.
If you child has an establish fear of heights than TOT is not the ride for them. But if your child is just uneasy because it is a new experience than get them in the ride
At the end of the day you know your child better than any of us...
Enjoy your trip

Yes, I do tend to really push if I know they will enjoy it. With my son, it is more of a dark thing, than it is a ride thing. I guess I will just play it by ear. For the most part, I know when I can push and when he has dug his heels in and wont go no matter what. That is where I am hoping that my husband or my parents can help since him and I tend to fall into a power struggle or battle of wills

 

[Kristamouse]

Yes, I do tend to really push if I know they will enjoy it. With my son, it is more of a dark thing, than it is a ride thing. I guess I will just play it by ear. For the most part, I know when I can push and when he has dug his heels in and wont go no matter what. That is where I am hoping that my husband or my parents can help since him and I tend to fall into a power struggle or battle of wills

Be Strong Mama
Ask others in line and CM for additional
Pep talks! The family infront of us waited for my son and I get off Space. They cheered him and told him he was very brave!

 

[21stamps]

I am a mother to 6 Disney loving kids. I completely and respectfully disagree with the above poster on making your kids try the ride once. We have put our kids on rides when they were old enough and tall enough despite their precieved fear of said ride. We have had kids a bit apprehensive of Haunted Manison, Pirates, Rock and Roller Coster and Tower of Terror. We told each child they had to ride once and then could choose not to ride in the future. Every single time and every single kid has enjoyed the experience. They exited the ride happy and proud they conquered a fear.
Now I did't make my huge 3yo (in size 5 clothing) ride Dinosaur even though he was tall enough. Dinosaur, in my opinion, be scary for that age group. He happily played while my hubs and older kids rode. We did, however, make our 6yo ride Space Mountain. He had been on Thunder Mountain and Everest and was starting to get anxious because he would not sit next to us but behind or infront of us. He got a pep talk from us and a helpful CM. Our son rode 3 more times that day and many more after that and is a huge Space Mtn fan.
If you child has an establish fear of heights than TOT is not the ride for them. But if your child is just uneasy because it is a new experience than get them on the ride. My guess is that they will enjoy.
At the end of the day you know your child better than any of us and need to adjust any decision for them personally.
Enjoy your trip

Love this!!!

Yes, I do tend to really push if I know they will enjoy it. With my son, it is more of a dark thing, than it is a ride thing. I guess I will just play it by ear. For the most part, I know when I can push and when he has dug his heels in and wont go no matter what. That is where I am hoping that my husband or my parents can help since him and I tend to fall into a power struggle or battle of wills

Be Strong Mama
Ask others in line and CM for additional
Pep talks! The family infront of us waited for my son and I get off Space. They cheered him and told him he was very brave!

Agree!! Sometimes peer pressure is a good thing!
..and what person, adult or child, doesn't love the feeling of conquering a fear afterwards!

I think it sounds like this- if you can somehow get him to conquer or put a dent in the darkness thing before your trip, then you're probably more than halfway there!

 

[kshiban]

Be Strong Mama
Ask others in line and CM for additional
Pep talks! The family infront of us waited for my son and I get off Space. They cheered him and told him he was very brave!

That's so awesome of them! I bet it made your son feel even better about getting on the ride!

 

[kshiban]

Love this!!!


Agree!! Sometimes peer pressure is a good thing!
..and what person, adult or child, doesn't love the feeling of conquering a fear afterwards!

I think it sounds like this- if you can somehow get him to conquer or put a dent in the darkness thing before your trip, then you're probably more than halfway there!

Yes! Now how to do that...?
I actually am starting to realize some of this is my own selfishness. I want to go on all of the scary rides! My husband isn't into rides. My 8 year old needs to be my future ride buddy!

 

[21stamps]

Yes! Now how to do that...?
I actually am starting to realize some of this is my own selfishness. I want to go on all of the scary rides! My husband isn't into rides. My 8 year old needs to be my future ride buddy!

Ever since my son hit 48" I've been having a blast. I feel like a teenager again every time we go to an amusement park, fair, festival, etc. So trust me, I understand!!! Good Luck!

 

[Dead2009]

If you think he would be easily startled by a certain ride, there's always POVs of said rides that you could show him to garner his reaction to them.

 

[Reggie Colorado]

Our son had similar issues when we went to DL (age 5) and then MK (age 7).

Skipped: Big Thunder, Space Mountain

Skipped but he probably would have been fine: Haunted Mansion (elevator room was scary, less so once you get into the doom buggies), Seven Dwarfs Mine Train (it looks wilder than it is)

Rode but he did not want to ride again: Splash Mountain (did not like getting wet), Pirates (loud noises)

Apprehensive but enjoyed once he rode: Barnstormer (mini-coaster), Peter Pan (darkness), Buzz Lightyear (loud noises)

We had no issues with any of the other rides (we skipped Stitch). It helped to "work our way up" -- e.g., rode Winnie the Pooh before Peter Pan