Parades & Critter Country (& Tomorrowland)
Parade time! Tokyo’s are supposed to be excellent, so I proceed giddily to the hub to wait for Happiness is Here.
Now, typically in Disneyland I don’t watch the parades. My home park is famously congested, which parades exacerbate. It’s not much fun at all staking out a spot for hours on end, only to fight some flatulent tourist who tries sitting on top of me at the last minute.
Tokyo solves a lot of this simply because you’re not allowed to start reserving spots until an hour before show time. Tokyo’s guests across the board are rule-abiding and polite too, with their comfy branded floor mats, making it a joy to sit amongst them. The quality of cast members and guests at Tokyo Disney Resort is simply the best, and it’s most apparent in scenarios like this where I can directly compare to the other Disney Parks. Incidentally, there were some simply adorable families here, such as the lads who sat near me:
Sitting here, let’s examine the hub…Let’s talk about the layout, about Cinderella Cas-
Is that grass real?!?!
I swear, until touching it I thought that was astroturf. Nope, that grass is alive! How is Tokyo keeping every single blade precisely the same length?! This detail, for me, sums up the insane cleanliness and precision of Tokyo Disney Resort.
Now, about that Cinderella Castle. Actually, about that hub altogether. My understanding is that all this is a near-exact duplicate of the same space in Magic Kingdom (minus some later renovations in Florida). It’s a design which Disney’s first-generation Imagineers fine-tuned in Orlando, and it works wonderfully. It’s the only part of Tokyo Disneyland I’ve seen so far where the scale seems appropriate. The wide parade pathways are proportioned well with the tall castle. The castle itself is massive – same exact height as Mt. Prometheus – but light, airy and inviting. Further castle thoughts I’ll save for visiting Magic Kingdom. It’s certainly not Sleeping Beauty Castle in Disneyland (or Hong Kong). Tiny SBC is perhaps mostly symbolic; CC is a constant looming presence, which gives the entire park a different feel since it's almost always visible.
At last Happiness is Here is here. It is a procession of assorted Disney characters (all the parades are) with floats resembling, like, colorful oversized Victorian toys.
These vehicles are nicely designed and perfectly maintained, as is the fur on the life-size characters.
We see some uncommon characters, particularly a dapper centipede gentleman from an early, forgotten Silly Symphony.
As with the live shows of Hong Kong, I’m at a loss to better praise this parade without simply listing out float units, but trust me that it was exceptional. Again, there was an indefinable energy in the air, a joy and professionalism which made this seem, to me, a well-above-average daytime parade.
Following that, I use my Hunny Hunt FastPass. Then I grab one for the park’s final half hour, the day’s last FastPass.
Then I skip over to Critter Country, where Splash Mountain is the park’s sole Single Rider. Good thing, too, since Splash’s wait times are always multi-hour affairs.
They’ve called this the best Splash of all. From the Critter Country lead-in alone I must concur. This land alone in Tokyo Disneyland (hub aside) doesn’t feel disproportioned. Every element fits together at the same scale, the wide walkways feel right with the hilly animal structures. It’s also the only part of TDL with hills of any sort, elevation changes to carry guests over the flume ride’s waterways, to create a changing topography, which is more in keeping with DisneySea’s design. Indeed, yesterday I’d climbed nearly 30 floors, and today so far only one (for Western River Railroad).
There are so, so many details in this Critter Country, like tiny animal houses of all sizes, including little mouse doors at the bases of lampposts. It is impeccably designed, giving Chickapin Hill an ideal uncompromised picturesque location.
Even with Single Rider – sharing the FastPass queue until the merge – the Splash Mountain is dang near 40 minutes. They were dispatching the logs very slowly, and unload had a mighty backup too. This is uncharacteristic in this Resort, so I’ll consider it a fluke. Good thing the queue’s underground details were as elaborate as all the rest.
The ride is substantially slower, more relaxed than Disneyland’s, giving it a laidback rustic vibe. Tokyo’s phenomenal upkeep meant every single animatronic was working at 100%. Not chipped rockwork. Bluegrass music and unique (to me) scenes suggest a lazy backwoods swamp cruise. By the pacing alone, this felt more family-friendly than Disneyland’s rather frantic thrill ride. The drops were similarly less hair-raising, in part due to the side-by-side lap bar seating. Disneyland has you straddling a central bench without restraints, making that final drop always feel genuinely dangerous.
My only issue with Tokyo’s Splash Mountain – otherwise a top tier ride, a true competitor to Hunny Hunt as the park’s best – is the seating. Too small for me. I’m tall by Japanese standards, 5’11”, and this is the only ride where I felt it. I had to curve my legs unnaturally for that lap bar to come down. Worse still, a cruel plastic mold in the seat continually dug into my…laughing place. After 14 minutes of ride time, I was super ready to be free of that!
One other problem, my fault: I’d been carrying this dinky paper bag around for my gear (rechargers, mifi, maps). It rode on the log’s floor, and halfway through the exit queue I find it bottom had worn away. So I collect my strewn possessions – helped by courteous Japanese guests, who are simply the best – trashing what I don’t need and awkwardly pocketing the rest.
Recovering, I stop at Raccoon Saloon for a snack. The soft serve was a swirl of sweet milk and seasonal pumpkin. It was definitely to my taste, really refreshing. There’s also a hotdog wrapped in a tortilla, which sounds like something I’d’ve done as a college freshman, but it was actually really good.
Critter Country also boasts a Beaver Brothers Canoes ride (guest-powered like Disneyland’s), but I choose to go explore the Rivers of America by other means.
As I’m strolling towards the Mark Twain in Westernland, soaking in the beautiful bucolic ambiance of the wilderness, I blurt out the loudest vulgarity you’ve ever heard!
My eReader is still riding Splash Mountain!
Stupid me, I’d been rereading “IT” some more before rope drop, and then completely forgotten about it. Hastily, I rush back towards Splash Mountain and very, very awkwardly explain the situation to the ride’s greeter. What with language barriers, I use Google image search to describe the problem. And bless the exceptional Tokyo cast members, they came through! They understood the problem, they retrieved the eReader (it floats too), and I spent some more time taking in Critter Country’s details while waiting.
Now, I’d hoped to spend this time on the Mark Twain, or on Tom Sawyer’s Island, but after the greatest non-crisis of the trip there just wasn’t the time. Instead my Space Mountain FastPass was nearly expired, so once again I found myself in Tomorrowland.
Note this photo was taken during Happy 15 early entry, this is in no way indicative of TDL's normal crowd patterns. (Hong Kong's, maybe.)
Tokyo’s Space Mountain is like Disneyland’s, but old school. The same tracks, but no onboard audio. Otherwise, everything else once you enter the Space Age dome is entirely the same. The ride vehicles have no plastic torture devices. But the audio accounts for a lot, particularly with Michael Giacchino’s great new score, so Disneyland’s is still better. Score home team!
And I gotta now leave Tokyo Disneyland early, to figure out the evening’s hotel situation, but I will return tonight!
Up next: Hotel Transfer and Nighttime Parades
– full of photographs, park observations, and hopefully advice for anyone who’s ever considered a trip to the other East Coast. It’ll be fun! 
