Post of Concern About The Forums

[flynnibus]

Compared to experiences I've had on other fan forums...you all know 'em....they're the "big" ones...what I've observed elsewhere is a highly controlled environment that benefits it's owner(s).

More common than you might think...

It's human nature to give the person you know a little bit more slack than the one you don't 'know'. Hence the n00bs almost always get a shorter leash than the 'old timers'. It's something admins/mods must be conscious of.. but the familiarity also gives a bit of insight into the future. Moderation isn't always a B&W topic.. it often is about containment or defusing. The moderator 'can see where this is headed..' and may intervene more quickly or not based on that insight.

Good moderation allows the community to self-resolve things because when you have reasonable people involved, 'police force' can actually agitate the situation worse than letting those involved settle down with time and common sense. The challenge is when you don't have reasonable people involved, or people that can't self-regulate, or someone does something so offensive it's going to pull others in and escalate the situation. That's when mods should act quickly and swiftly. It's all about redirecting the thread back to norm.

Virtually EVERY person gets more agitated when they get moderated. So moderation can often be an agitator and not a calming thing. The key is diffusing and not just sledgehammering. It's the same mindset you see in bar bouncers, etc..

It's why you see @wdwmagic do things like close a thread for a period.. let it settle.. then open again after everyone has taken a breather and calmed down.

Good moderators can take that insight into the posters into account when deciding what action is necessary.. but it should be more about decoding the situation and not playing favorites or being hypocritical. Alas there is often 'friendship' involved in these kinds of disputes, or people who think some are more 'valuable' than others, mucking up these decisions. And some sites/owners just don't get it and don't understand the consequences of their actions. Some sites just get big by the alignment of the moons.. and are able to carry that mommentum into something bigger... vs being great based on the strength of their community.

Some have the great community.. and lose it (micechat) based on their choices. Some grow it organically (like WDWMagic).

Alas the discussion forum is aging in dominance. Front pages, blogs, feeds, etc are what drive a lot of traffic.. because most eyeballs are looking for the 'quick hit' of info and not the engaging discussion.

 

[DisneyDebNJ]

the problem with many leaving was mostly cause be a few that could not take a joke after someone clearly apologize and had to keep bringing up the past.no harm in having different opinion but if people cant not take a lighthearted humor then what is the point?

Very good point. I don't think there was a mad exodus of sorts, but alot just taking a break. The problem, from what I understand, wasn't the banter between two sides, but the other elements involved.

 

[DisneyDebNJ]

And just to clarify matters, I am quite sure that my name was on the top of the "enemy list", and I was the target of a lot of the stones being thrown.

Nemo in all honesty, I did not think it was directed towards anyone in particular. Atleast, I did not read it that way. In all honesty, I thought it was just a comment made. In no way, shape or form, did I think anyone in particular was being singled out.

 

[MOXOMUMD]

More common than you might think...

It's human nature to give the person you know a little bit more slack than the one you don't 'know'. Hence the n00bs almost always get a shorter leash than the 'old timers'. It's something admins/mods must be conscious of.. but the familiarity also gives a bit of insight into the future. Moderation isn't always a B&W topic.. it often is about containment or defusing. The moderator 'can see where this is headed..' and may intervene more quickly or not based on that insight.

Good moderation allows the community to self-resolve things because when you have reasonable people involved, 'police force' can actually agitate the situation worse than letting those involved settle down with time and common sense. The challenge is when you don't have reasonable people involved, or people that can't self-regulate, or someone does something so offensive it's going to pull others in and escalate the situation. That's when mods should act quickly and swiftly. It's all about redirecting the thread back to norm.

Virtually EVERY person gets more agitated when they get moderated. So moderation can often be an agitator and not a calming thing. The key is diffusing and not just sledgehammering. It's the same mindset you see in bar bouncers, etc..

It's why you see @wdwmagic do things like close a thread for a period.. let it settle.. then open again after everyone has taken a breather and calmed down.

Good moderators can take that insight into the posters into account when deciding what action is necessary.. but it should be more about decoding the situation and not playing favorites or being hypocritical. Alas there is often 'friendship' involved in these kinds of disputes, or people who think some are more 'valuable' than others, mucking up these decisions. And some sites/owners just don't get it and don't understand the consequences of their actions. Some sites just get big by the alignment of the moons.. and are able to carry that mommentum into something bigger... vs being great based on the strength of their community.

Some have the great community.. and lose it (micechat) based on their choices. Some grow it organically (like WDWMagic).

Alas the discussion forum is aging in dominance. Front pages, blogs, feeds, etc are what drive a lot of traffic.. because most eyeballs are looking for the 'quick hit' of info and not the engaging discussion.

Well said.

 

[sweetpee_1993]

Agree, people need to grow a bit of thicker skin.
Nowadays people seem very delicate when someone "insults THEIR" feelings (aka just mention flaws in their points, but they take them as an insult)
Id say people need to keep always in mind the other side is not always just to "get them".
Only when things get personal.. the mods should step up and calm things down.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a naturally thick-skinned person. I always had way too tender a heart for that. As a kid if another kid said "Boo!" to me I'd run & hide. I was always perfectly friendly with everyone and anyone just because it wasn't in me to be anything else.

As a younger adult I was much the same. Had a few instances where other adults reduced me to a blubbering baby completely because I took something personal that I shouldn't have.

Then I worked in law enforcement and a LOT changed. My husband got where he wouldn't come to my office to see me because he said he didn't know who I was when I was there working. He said I wasn't myself, that I was cold and void of empathy. It was the job. The job demanded that I move on from that. I learned more control of my emotions. Since leaving that profession I've softened back up quite a bit but I don't think I'll ever lose the tough skin entirely. I can pull that suit of tough armor on real quick then shed it.

Won't say I've never had my "feelings hurt" on a discussion forum. Comes with the territory. This is when I step back, re-center myself, learn what I need to, and move on with life. Regardless of what does or does not go down online, regardless of who thinks what of me out there tomorrow the sun is coming up, I'll breathe, my family is good, and life shall continue. If the online stuff isn't working out then leave it there. Not a necessity in life. Nice perk when times are good but not necessary for a fulfilled life. Right?

 

[Tiggerish]

I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a naturally thick-skinned person. I always had way too tender a heart for that. As a kid if another kid said "Boo!" to me I'd run & hide. I was always perfectly friendly with everyone and anyone just because it wasn't in me to be anything else.

As a younger adult I was much the same. Had a few instances where other adults reduced me to a blubbering baby completely because I took something personal that I shouldn't have.

Then I worked in law enforcement and a LOT changed. My husband got where he wouldn't come to my office to see me because he said he didn't know who I was when I was there working. He said I wasn't myself, that I was cold and void of empathy. It was the job. The job demanded that I move on from that. I learned more control of my emotions. Since leaving that profession I've softened back up quite a bit but I don't think I'll ever lose the tough skin entirely. I can pull that suit of tough armor on real quick then shed it.

Won't say I've never had my "feelings hurt" on a discussion forum. Comes with the territory. This is when I step back, re-center myself, learn what I need to, and move on with life. Regardless of what does or does not go down online, regardless of who thinks what of me out there tomorrow the sun is coming up, I'll breathe, my family is good, and life shall continue. If the online stuff isn't working out then leave it there. Not a necessity in life. Nice perk when times are good but not necessary for a fulfilled life. Right?

Exactly right.

 

[flynnibus]

Won't say I've never had my "feelings hurt" on a discussion forum. Comes with the territory

Unfortunately many people are now raised or sheltered in environments where they are taught to only be positive (even if it means lying), and they falsely shelter each other from reality. Then when they go outside their bubble, they act like the world is over because they didn't stroke them the way they are accustomed to.

"Tough Love" and honesty are no longer PC..

So when they join a community where people are allowed to be critical.. often some are lost in that open range that can swing both positive and negative..

Hopefully in a generation or two we outgrow this 'shelter everyone' and 'everyone is a winner' attitude that blossomed in the 90s/00s. Else the first time a more self-sufficient, resilient society challenges us.. they'll blow us over.

 

[Hakunamatata]

Unfortunately many people are now raised or sheltered in environments where they are taught to only be positive (even if it means lying), and they falsely shelter each other from reality. Then when they go outside their bubble, they act like the world is over because they didn't stroke them the way they are accustomed to.

"Tough Love" and honesty are no longer PC..

So when they join a community where people are allowed to be critical.. often some are lost in that open range that can swing both positive and negative..

Hopefully in a generation or two we outgrow this 'shelter everyone' and 'everyone is a winner' attitude that blossomed in the 90s/00s. Else the first time a more self-sufficient, resilient society challenges us.. they'll blow us over.

It would do our culture good if we told little Johnny "You really are a bad soccer player and you are not getting a trophy for showing up. We give trophies to the winners."

 

[BoarderPhreak]

Coffee is for closers.

I think some have a general misunderstanding of the "haters" (such an incorrect term, ugh). If these folks didn't love Disney so much, first of all - they wouldn't notice these things in the first place - or care. Likewise, the World n00bs may not know any different because of their age, indifference or only went there for the first time last week. Being this is a discussion forum, one has to understand that people have different opinions - which leads to the very discussion the name alludes to.

I think it swings both ways. One group shouldn't be putting down another or "bombing" each other's threads just for the sake of causing a stir.

Live and let live. But be an adult. Good, healthy debate is nice. Being a tool is not.

Use the Ignore and Report tools as necessary; they're there for a reason, and work.

 

[Minthorne]

I guess we see what we see - I haven't noticed this as much until I read this thread.
Can't we all just get along!

I love you all and want to give you a big hug!!

 

[sweetpee_1993]

Coffee is for closers.

I think some have a general misunderstanding of the "haters" (such an incorrect term, ugh). If these folks didn't love Disney so much, first of all - they wouldn't notice these things in the first place - or care. Likewise, the World n00bs may not know any different because of their age, indifference or only went there for the first time last week. Being this is a discussion forum, one has to understand that people have different opinions - which leads to the very discussion the name alludes to.

I think it swings both ways. One group shouldn't be putting down another or "bombing" each other's threads just for the sake of causing a stir.

Live and let live. But be an adult. Good, healthy debate is nice. Being a tool is not.

Use the Ignore and Report tools as necessary; they're there for a reason, and work.

Short, sweet, and to the point. Me likey!

I hate when I even think the word n00b because no matter what age I was the first time I did something I was once the n00b, too. Right?

 

[sweetpee_1993]

I guess we see what we see - I haven't noticed this as much until I read this thread.
Can't we all just get along!

I love you all and want to give you a big hug!!

Love fest!!!!!!

 

[BoarderPhreak]

Short, sweet, and to the point. Me likey!

I hate when I even think the word n00b because no matter what age I was the first time I did something I was once the n00b, too. Right?

Everyone was a n00b at one point, yep! As grizzled veterans, we should be gently guiding them with The Wisdom of the World.

 

[rsoxguy]

*Momentary Serious Post*

I have indeed witnessed the turn of events over the past few days here on the forum. I find it somewhat sad and ironic that such virulent things can occur on a website devoted to Disney World. In addition to the sociological observations made by members above, I would like to add an observation of my own. Our society has been changing for quite some time in the direction of self-centered communication, in which individuals only listen to others for the sake of waiting to speak. The attitude of many today involves a painful reality; if others claim that they are wrong regarding a certain matter, they are labeled as being judgmental and hateful ignoramuses. If, however, they claim that others are wrong regarding a certain matter, they consider themselves as being intelligent and rational people who are simply enlightening others. Anyone daring enough to disagree is taken down to the level of worms because of their audacity in having a differing opinion. This happens often in the field of politics, etc. Unfortunately, I find this to have occurred to some level over the past few days here.

I think that there was a bit of a lack of common civility on both sides, and things escalated to ridiculous levels. Regardless of the end result, I'm certain that things will calm down soon and we'll get back to debating the size of bolts needed for IASW to operate correctly.

I honestly have little use for such things, hence my lame attempt at levity. Some have claimed to quit the forum, others have stayed, but in the end I believe that the overwhelming cause involved the simplicity of arrogance and pride. The two are a more dangerous combination than matches and a four year old child. Me? I disagree with some, and agree with some. I find this to be true far beyond the internet.

 

[Cesar R M]

I guess we see what we see - I haven't noticed this as much until I read this thread.
Can't we all just get along!

I love you all and want to give you a big hug!!

Hugs cost 25$ a piece, please note that I accept traveler's check

 

[Minthorne]

Hugs cost 25$ a piece, please note that I accept traveler's check

is there a Fastpass+ available?

 

[flynnibus]

I hate when I even think the word n00b because no matter what age I was the first time I did something I was once the n00b, too. Right?

n00b and ignorance are both conditions tied to a point in time that an individual can resolve - they are not persistent like stupidity

One can be ignorant or a n00b and function quite well... the key is acknowledging the condition and acting accordingly If one does that... they don't stay in that condition long.

 

[MOXOMUMD]

Hugs cost 25$ a piece, please note that I accept traveler's check

Gives @Minthorne big hug, they're free. Waves hi to you. I need the $25 for my Glow Ears.

 

[sweetpee_1993]

n00b and ignorance are both conditions tied to a point in time that an individual can resolve - they are not persistent like stupidity

One can be ignorant or a n00b and function quite well... the key is acknowledging the condition and acting accordingly If one does that... they don't stay in that condition long.

Absolutely. Self-awareness goes a long way.

 

[Lucky]

Can't we all just get along!

I love you all and want to give you a big hug!!