Planning with divorced parents

[JeffnPa]

Seeking advise, my family wife and 3 kids are planning our 4th trip to WDW. the last time we went 2012, we went with just us, this time the kids have asked if their Grandparents can come along, the issue is they are divorced and have been for 20 +yrs. the real issue is the grandfather is remarried and "she" does not like anything about the grandmother. So we have asked each of them to come along and as you might have guessed they both said yes, I love the fact that they want to be with the kids to enjoy this time, but now the grandfather is upset because he knows this will cause an issue with his current wife, My suggestions were the following;
1. Everyone come and be adults and enjoy the magic that it is.
2. Grandfather and wife come at the beginning of the week and Grandmother at the end of the week.
3. Grandfather come to WDW without his wife.

Not sure how this will play out but anyone that has had to deal with I'd love to hear.

 

[Figgy1]

Well I wanted to thank everyone for their feedback, all were very good!! To update everyone on the what occurred, We have reached an agreement that will please all. The Grandmother will be coming to WDW with us in May, we will be staying at BC in a villa. The Grandfather has offered to take the family on a WDW cruise next year! So it appears that everyone will get "their" vacation time they wanted with the kids.

Congrats on a magical solution!

 

[Disvillain63]

This is so petty where an adult acts like a child. 20+ years divorced, the new wife has issues? There is a very simple solutions:

Tell the grandfather that he is welcome to come. Tell him his wife is welcome to come. Tell him if his wife creates an issue, drama, or anything else, that both will be asked to leave and never invited again.

All I can say is this is a train wreck from the start if the "new wife" goes. My only recommendation is let them split the trip with #2. Otherwise, your vacation will be ruined.

You would think that 2 adults could learn to disagree and let bygones be bygones for their kids...but it doesn't always work that way. My parents have been divorced 35 years and the bitterness lingers. Planning my wedding was 'fun' and then my children's baptisms, etc... It continues today in planning their weddings. I don't know why they divorced, but I know one parent is more resentful than the other. I think it's a pain that never goes away.

As for the OP, as much as I'd love to tell you to go with solution #1, I can't. Solution #2 is probably the best, but I'd give Grandma the choice of beginning of the trip or end of the trip, since it's Grandpa's wife that seems to have the problem. I, personally, would pick the beginning of the trip...it's more magical and the children are fresh (not exhausted).

 

[Hot Lava]

You lucked out! That sounds like an excellent solution. I am guessing that the new wife wanted nothing to do with a vacation with your mother (or maybe even full time at the parks?). Even if that is the case, a bonus vacation for you!