Pre-Trip It’s a trap?!

I have either made the best or worst vacation decision.

In May 2019 I will be combining a Universal trip with my MIL and SIL with a WDW trip with my immediate family.

I love my family but... I’ve come to realize that traveling with them isn’t my favorite way to vacation. It has the potential to get a little tense. But this time it may be better. Maybe?

I haven’t traveled with my MIL in like 15 years and never with my SIL. But in the spirit of this thread title... I have a bad feeling about this. This portion of the trip also has potential to be good or a disaster.

That’s why I choose “It’s a trap?!” as my pre trip title. I hope everything goes well but gut feeling is that it be messy.

Part 1: Accio Wine!

• 3 Nights at Cabana Bay
• 2 full park days at Universal and maybe partials on the either end.
• The Cast:
  • MIL
  • SIL
  • and I (BES)

Part 2: Dysfunctional still has the word fun in it, right?

• 1 night at AKL in a 1 bedroom villa.
• 6 nights at POP in 2 rooms.
• 7 days of park hopping
• The Cast:
  • my parents
  • my younger brother
  • my nephew (who will be 8)
  • and myself

The (mis)adventure begins in 68 days.

 

[aliceismad]

Deep breaths!

 

[Back!Elbow!Shoulders!]

There was a cardinal at my bird feeder today. I have heard that cardinals represent lost loved ones visiting you. Although I don’t believe that is literally true I like the sentiment and often find myself thinking about my brother when I see one. Not my little brother. My other brother.

I have been subconsciously avoiding this post because it is kind of a bummer. Hopefully it will provide some context into why I think this upcoming family trip should be better* than the last one. (*Not totally drama free because well there’s just a baseline level of dysfunction)

My other brother, the middle child, passed away suddenly about 2 and a half years ago. He is/was the father of my nephew.

It was only a couple of months after his death that my parents proposed the last family Disney trip. They wanted a positive thing for my nephew to focus on. I think it was also for them to have something to focus on too. I can see why they picked Disney as it was a place we had so many happy memories.

The previous trip got a bit out of hand because everyone was still pretty fresh in their grieving and there was this ultra-focus on being happy and everything being perfect etc. It was also hard be reminded of memories of past trips while there and being reminded that he was gone.

It was also very bittersweet to be there with my nephew for his first Disney trip. Although it was great to see him experience his Disney firsts, it was sad that his dad wasn’t there to see them too.

So now that more time has passed I think this trip should be somewhat less stressful. I think we’re at a point where we can talk about him and remember him in a way that’s less emotionally raw.

To end this post on a happier note- during that last trip a cardinal flew up and sat in a tree right by the queue we were in for the Barnstormer.

That was my nephew’s first rollercoaster. His dad was quite the thrill seeker. He would have been happy to know that my nephew very much enjoyed it and all of the other coasters he was able to ride.

 

[NessNewt]

There was a cardinal at my bird feeder today. I have heard that cardinals represent lost loved ones visiting you. Although I don’t believe that is literally true I like the sentiment and often find myself thinking about my brother when I see one. Not my little brother. My other brother.

I have been subconsciously avoiding this post because it is kind of a bummer. Hopefully it will provide some context into why I think this upcoming family trip should be better* than the last one. (*Not totally drama free because well there’s just a baseline level of dysfunction)

My other brother, the middle child, passed away suddenly about 2 and a half years ago. He is/was the father of my nephew.

It was only a couple of months after his death that my parents proposed the last family Disney trip. They wanted a positive thing for my nephew to focus on. I think it was also for them to have something to focus on too. I can see why they picked Disney as it was a place we had so many happy memories.

The previous trip got a bit out of hand because everyone was still pretty fresh in their grieving and there was this ultra-focus on being happy and everything being perfect etc. It was also hard be reminded of memories of past trips while there and being reminded that he was gone.

It was also very bittersweet to be there with my nephew for his first Disney trip. Although it was great to see him experience his Disney firsts, it was sad that his dad wasn’t there to see them too.

So now that more time has passed I think this trip should be somewhat less stressful. I think we’re at a point where we can talk about him and remember him in a way that’s less emotionally raw.

To end this post on a happier note- during that last trip a cardinal flew up and sat in a tree right by the queue we were in for the Barnstormer.

That was my nephew’s first rollercoaster. His dad was quite the thrill seeker. He would have been happy to know that my nephew very much enjoyed it and all of the other coasters he was able to ride.

I'm so sorry for yours and your family's loss. I imagine your trips with your nephew will all feel somewhat bittersweet, but I hope this one does feel less "raw" for all of you.

I love cardinals because my grandmother loved cardinals (she passed away a few years ago) and now whenever I see them I think of her. It does feel like a way to stay connected to someone who is gone.

 

[Darstarr]

Thank you for sharing. That was very brave and touching. I do believe in the Cardinal story/theory. I dont think your brother IS a Cardinal but, something. There is something...
(And a Cardinal lands on my back porch as I type this, but a female- your bro is not on Long Island)

 

[Swissmiss]

My sister also believes on the cardinal theory and she says one was hanging around her place the other day on the anniversary of our mom’s death.

I’m sure this trip will be very different - as you mentioned, at the very least the emotions will be less raw.

AND you know that you can exaggerate any story for us and it will be good therapy for you to type it out

 

[Back!Elbow!Shoulders!]

I'm so sorry for yours and your family's loss. I imagine your trips with your nephew will all feel somewhat bittersweet, but I hope this one does feel less "raw" for all of you.

Thank you. I suspect you’re right that it won’t be devoid of bittersweetness. Just hoping that we have enough distance to more healthily deal with our new normal.

Thank you for sharing. That was very brave and touching.

And thanks for reading. I have been finding trip reporting to be way more therapeutic that I ever would have thought. Having to pause and put words to experiences seems to be really helpful in processing them.

AND you know that you can exaggerate any story for us and it will be good therapy for you to type it out

Oh between the MIL portion and my family having general hot-mess tendencies there should be plenty to share. I hope the stories will be as amusing to read as they will be therapeutic to share.

 

[Laura Loves Tigger]

I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. I will be praying that there will be moments of joy when you are sharing thoughts and memories of previous trips.

 

[Back!Elbow!Shoulders!]

Final pre-trip day.

Haven't packed yet. Decided that spending the weekend with DH would be a better use of my time and I'll back today when he is at work. I already pre-miss him. And doggo.

DH has been giving me trip pep talks.

DH: You'll have fun. You'll have SIL around (who I adore), and later on your brother (also much adoration).

BES: True. You're probably right.

DH: I mean it's not going to be as fun as your last trip- but c'mon that's probably like your ideal trip, right?

BES: That trip was really fun but I still think going with you would be ideal.

DH: Awww. We'll see...

How can I leave all that fluff?

 

[Back!Elbow!Shoulders!]

Final pretrip ramblings:

I did a final pre-trip Target run this weekend. @Darstarr- you're right there's something off there now. I was really disappointed in the swimwear selection after multiple years of good finds there. Also was devastated to learn they discontinued the underwear that I have been buying for years. Years. Ugh. Get it together Target.

Lastly, my dad had told me that it was my mom who wanted the regional airport even if it meant a connection.

In coordinating my mom driving me to the airport, I learned that she thinks this flight thing is bananas too. Totally not her idea. Between her and my brother I think they will be able to successfully herd my dad and nephew thru ATL. If they are awake enough.

Off to pack now. I have a pedicure scheduled with my mom for later today so my goal is to be fully packed before then.

See you in the real TR. Thanks for reading!

 

[NessNewt]

Happy packing day!

 

[Janir]

BES: One bummer thing if I end up being [on a 9 month booze and sushi break] this year I wouldn’t be able to see all the Star Wars stuff for years. I was kind of hoping to sneak in another quick trip before my AP expires.

DH: You could still go. You just couldn’t ride a lot of stuff.

BES: Just walking around and snacking are also very important parts to a Disney trip. I could (hopefully) still do those.

DH: ...Maybe we could go together.

BES:
View attachment 363866

This is the most interest DH has expressed in doing anything Disney- ever.

There’s just too much up in the air right now to actually get serious about this but... I am tentatively dreaming about a little trip in Oct. or Nov.

Maybe DH would like Coronado. It’s not too Disney... ok. I had better stop thinking about this. I don’t want to spook him. Gotta play this real cool.

So to get DH interested in taking Disney Trips with you, you have to plan to be pregnant during the trip?? ;-/

Maybe his original objection is not wanting to ride the rides? But a Food/Wine festival trip might be his speed. Then you sneak him into a few dark rides after a few drinks, he has some fun and then some more and soon you have a convert! Sneaky, but if it works. ;-P

 

[Back!Elbow!Shoulders!]

So to get DH interested in taking Disney Trips with you, you have to plan to be pregnant during the trip?? ;-/

Maybe his original objection is not wanting to ride the rides? But a Food/Wine festival trip might be his speed. Then you sneak him into a few dark rides after a few drinks, he has some fun and then some more and soon you have a convert! Sneaky, but if it works. ;-P

The potential trip and potential new family member have more to do with DH’s job situation than each other.

You are correct in that he doesn’t like rides. Well- thrill rides. I convinced him years ago to go to Dollywood and he only managed one coaster but he does still speak highly of Dollywood overall.

I think the seeds of a conversion are already started. He did comment last night that he wished that he was going on this trip.

 

[Nunu]

Catching up and following along!
Happy and safe travels!

 

[aliceismad]

The potential trip and potential new family member have more to do with DH’s job situation than each other.

You are correct in that he doesn’t like rides. Well- thrill rides. I convinced him years ago to go to Dollywood and he only managed one coaster but he does still speak highly of Dollywood overall.

I think the seeds of a conversion are already started. He did comment last night that he wished that he was going on this trip.

Then Disney should be perfect for him! So many great rides and attractions that are not thrill rides.

 

[Laura Loves Tigger]

Have a wonderful trip!