Help! Ride fear in 4y.o.

[Highland_Holly]

My sister just called me from their FIRST trip to WDW with their 4 y.o. boy and 7 y.o. girl. This is day 3 and they are miserable! The 4 y.o. is hysterical in any ride line... won't meet characters, etc. He has never been like this at home. We (dh & I ) are seasoned WDW vets and have taken our kids several times and have NEVER encountered this! Mine are all WDW enthusiasts... no fears! Every trip has been fun and magical!

My sis called asking for advice as her dh is becoming impatient. I suggested changing tactics... opt for shows and things that are open-air (skip the rides with him) and maybe split up, each parent with a child. I also suggested slowing the pace... maybe starting tomorrow with a leisurely morning at the pool.

Any other suggestions would be appreciated... tip/tricks for making the dark lines/queues better. I would hate for the remaining 4 days to go like this... I want their trip to end on a magical note!

Thanks!

 

[disneymyway]

I suggest the mom takes one for the team and goes over to goes to the play areas and places that aren't scary and let the 7 year old and dh go off by themselves. I had to do that once and it was one of the sweetest times I've ever had at WDW. The rest of them had fun, but I had really precious moments with my little princess!

 

[DisneyJoe]

Toys/games to pass the time in the queues.

Flashlights while on the ride to reduce the dark fear factor (penlights or cell phone lights work great)

Don't force the issue, gotta take it at the child's pace. If you force it once too many times....its difficult to recover.

We used to visit every other year (now its usually once per year). My sons are 12 years apart in age. The oldest started going when he was 6 almost 7, we never had any issues with him.

The youngest went when he was 1 - mostly in the stroller, napped a lot, fearful of characters, but was ok on rides - sometimes distractions were needed.

When he was 3, he was VERY afraid of characters, we left 1 character meal and canceled a few others. Was much braver on rides - actually gave us the most problem on the buses!!!

When he was 5, he was fine to walk up to characters and get autographs and hug the characters. Went back at 5 1/2, he was a seasoned veteran!


I suggest that they split up and do different activities at this point.

 

[daverube]

How about letting the 4 year old work with Mousekeeping all day scrubbing bathrooms and making up beds. That way the 4 year old will understand the difference between work and fun!!!

In all seriousness, I'd tell your sis to go sit near the Aloha Isle all day and eat Dole Whip floats with her child. That way, even if she can't ride the rides, she can enjoy the BEST SNACK IN ALL OF WDW!!! :king: Plus, you have the Treehouse right next door. As it is an open-air, walk through attraction, maybe the 4 year old will become acclimated a little bit to the atmosphere or WDW......

Then again, who knows what kids are going to do.....

dave

 

[disneymyway]

then again, who knows what kids are going to do.....

dave

So true....

 

[Coree]

We had the exact same experience the last trip when my DD was 2 1/2. There wasn't anything we could do about and we just had to relax and do what we could, which basically meant a couple of outdoor shows (she freaked in the theater shows), playgrounds, and lots of walking around.

 

[pjulie75]

Agree with previous posts, it sometimes just becomes a different kind of trip visiting with young kids. I would just venture round park and maybe try and go on the odd ride, ie IASW or the carousel something gentle with small queues. Would she even like the Bobbidy Bobbity Boutique to get her nails done and hair (Mum would be there of course to give her confidence)? Go for a ice cream sundae. I have heard there a Belle Storytime throughout the day at the bookstore at the back of the castle. What about, I don't know what it is called:veryconfu, the people mover type ride that you go on near Space Mountain. You can just sit back and relax on the ride. What about doing some sort of treasure hunt, give her things she has to find each (ie spot the castle, Ariel, Mickey shaped balloon, a horse (carousel) etc etc) and then of course, a treat at the end from one of the shops. My kids love things like that and they are 5. I really hope they enjoy their trip, it can be a bit overwhelming:animwink:

 

[Highland_Holly]

Thanks everyone... I will pass on the advice to her. I know she is just WAY frustrated. And her dh is a bit of a vacation kamikaze! LOL! A hard combination when you throw in an uncooperative 4 y.o.!

I have been thinking about this since she called, and I have zeroed in on what I think her biggest mistake was. They didn't tell the kids they were coming until last weekend. Total surprise. Her poor ds had no preparation for it... had no idea what to expect... and I think he is operating on extreme overload! Surprises are fine, but I think a little preparation can go a long way!

Thanks!

Holly

 

[bears163]

where are they from? are the kids ever in big crowds like at disney? it can be overwhelming for kids who never have been in a place like that. i would do like others have posted. take the 4 y.o. & stay at the pool or something that is slow & then maybe work their way back to the rides & anything else that scared him. but i gotta say i like the idea of leaving him the the mousekeeping though. great idea...lol

 

[tink68]

This is a big fear of mine when we go in October with our 3 1/2 yr old son. We have let him watch the planning videos, youtube ride videos, etc, etc. I like the idea of the light in the dark lines so I will buy him one of those light up toys when we get there. I am already planning nap times, break times and switching with hubby the older kid if he does not want to go on certain things so that we all get to have some fun. This is our first visit with such a young one so should be interesting but fun. Good luck to your sis and her family. :wave:

 

[durangojim]

I feel for your sister but you definately can't force the issue. In May when we were on POTC a father tried to force is 4 y/o daughter to get on the ride and then berated her when the CM wouldn't let them go while the girl was crying hysterically. Not cool at all. "You're going to have fun D*** it!"

By the way this brings up an interesting point about how many of us WDWMagicers have taken our kids to WDW at an early age, and if they have had any ride/character anxiety. My son was 7 weeks when we first went and just turned 3 yesterday. He's been to WDW 9 times and loves all the characters and rides (especially the pirate ride and the ghost ride) and has not had any kind of fears yet (knock on wood). I think alot of that has to do with the fact that my wife and I would always tell him what to expect before the ride and while we were on it, always emphasizing that this is pretend. My daughter is 5 months and has been to WDW once and will be again next month. We plan to do the same for her because when you think about it, a very young child doesn't know what is supposed to be scary or funny and takes its cues from the people around her. Not trying to be on a soapbox, just making some observations.

 

[Highland_Holly]

My sister's kids went to Sesame Place last year and loved it. I have never been, so I don't know if there are any comparable parts. We/they are all from Michigan. Definately not city people, but they have been exposed to crowds at festivals, etc. though. We tried to get them to come to WDW with us 2 yrs ago, but my sister's dh argued that the kids "weren't ready". Maybe they are just not ready for his pace... like I said, kamikaze! LOL!

We probably shouldn't do WDW all together anyway. My family are "journey" people and my sis and her dh are "destination" people, KWIM? They attack the vacation experience, while we savour it.

They are at EPCOT today... found the KidCot stations in World Showcase and that seems to be doing the trick. Thanks for all the great comments. And keep 'em coming. They have 4 more days to survive! LOL! Plus it is HOT there now, which I'm sure makes everyone crabby!

~Holly

 

[Gooch]

I was just there with a 3 year old (first visit as well) and I honestly thought that she was going to freak out on the majority of the rides, but she was surprisingly calm. Even on Pirates and Haunted Mansion, which I thought had ''tantrum'' written all over them. She did kind of throw mini-fits on our way into some rides (the Figment ride in Epcot & another 2 which I figured were triggered by the rides being in the dark) but no real outbursts...the rest of the trip was a different story. Yikes. Haha.

Anyhow, it really depends on the child, I guess. Like I said, I was expecting the complete opposite of what happened in terms of the rides. She did have a hard time greeting characters up close, but that all changed when someone went with her. Just explain to the child the type of ride they'll be going on to calm them down. For example, we settled her down on POTC by telling her we were going on a boat to see singing pirates, etc. Just something to kind of sway their opinion without lying to them as some people tend to do.

Hope that helps.

 

[pjulie75]

They are at EPCOT today... found the KidCot stations in World Showcase and that seems to be doing the trick. Thanks for all the great comments

What is KidCot?

 

[Boray]

My son was 4 when we went for the first time and I came supplied with tons of queue diversions. The most successful one was a Magna Doodle that had a small microphone/recorder on it. He would hold down a button, talk into it and it would record about 10 seconds of sound. Press the play button and it would play back. The toy was about 5" square and 1" thick. He had no idea how long we would be waiting in line, because he'd be drawing and playing with the Magna doodle the entire time. Maybe something like that would be a great diversion...

As far as being scared of characters, I totally understand that. They're huge, and indimidating. Have him take that at his own pace. Stand at a distance from them and see how they interact with other children. Maybe the 4 year-old will see that the characters are gentle with the others and will eventually come around.

Kids can be very unpredictable. Unfortunately, you can't make a child not be scared of these things. The parents are just going to have to be patient and let the kid dictate his comfort level.

Good luck to your sister!

 

[Highland_Holly]

There are kids' activity stations at each of the countries and at every land at Epcot. Basically coloring tables where they can color a paper shape with a hole punched it in and hang it from a cardboard mask on a stick. I think at the countries, they do rubber stamps of each country. They are nice diversions for the little ones at that more adult park.

 

[MichWolv]

My son is 5, and has been to WDW 5 times and DL twice. There was one trip, when we was 3, where we had problems similar to the ones the OP's friend has described. We eventually figured out what to do with him.

Basically, he was overwhelmed by the combination of the crowds and the multi-sensory immersive environment of the rides and shows. So we changed things up and did things that seemed to by less immersive and environment controlling.

Tom Sawyer Island, the MK Railroad, Dumbo, the carousel, Aladdin's carpets, TTA, Pooh's Playful Spot, Mad Tea Party, Autopia all worked well at the MK. Epcot was a big problem because everything is pretty immersive. Animal Kingdom was better -- the safari, the animal treks and trails, the spinning dino ride, the Pocahontas Show, the bird show all worked out well. And the water parks. He loved the water parks at that age, and wanted to go on everything. Being outdoors and in an environment that didn't attack all the senses at once allowed him to really enjoy himself.

So your friends might need to have a different kind of trip.

By the way, we just came back from DLR, and my son wanted to go on, and enjoyed, every ride at either park, except for Tower of Terror -- that was still too much for him -- and HISTA, which still had some overpowering images. So tell your friends that their 4 y.o will likely outgrow this.

 

[Highland_Holly]

Thanks, MichWolv... but I've just gotta say... GO GREEN!!! :sohappy: Can't wait for football season this year... loving our new coach!

Holly
MSU... Class of 1992

 

[coltow]

This is a big fear of mine when we go in October with our 3 1/2 yr old son. We have let him watch the planning videos, youtube ride videos, etc, etc. I like the idea of the light in the dark lines so I will buy him one of those light up toys when we get there. I am already planning nap times, break times and switching with hubby the older kid if he does not want to go on certain things so that we all get to have some fun. This is our first visit with such a young one so should be interesting but fun. Good luck to your sis and her family. :wave:

Also try renting/buying the sing along dvd's. I fully believe that these helped my kids. The Disney Land and Animal Kingdom ones are my favorites. It helps kids with the characters, songs and even a few rides. The downside was that my nephew wanted to dance with the trees outside HM and DS wanted to take a boat ride with the Country Bears.

 

[Momketeer]

What does he seem to be afraid of? loud noises? crowded que? dark ride? Traveling to the World with my 2 little ones over the past 6 years, we've collected quite a few 'tricks', hope something is helpful.

My DD was overwhelmed by the noises of shows, parades, fireworks and some rides...brought her to tears. Total sensory-overload=meltdown. To help her, we got some kid-sized ear protection, think Air-traffic contoller but in kid size and colors. They block out the loud noises and cut down ambient noise but the kids can still hear you when you talk to them. Peltor is the brand we found and they work great. Clip to a backpack when not in use. Now with her 'earmuffs' she's fearless and can relax and enjoy.

My son hates crowds. "Earmuffs" and a travel-size MagnaDoodle (I think someone else suggested that too) or favorite small toy help draw his focus from the crowd to a more happy place. We play waiting games...Disney trivia, of course..in lines. It draw their attention to something more fun and helpd pass the time. Sticking to open venue attractions is a great tip you gave them and a great way to introduce some shows/attractions. Another poster had a great list. Then they have a safe/fun point of reference to go by to try the dark rides.

For the dark rides, I collect character key chain lights from the Dollar Store before a trip and they clip right to the kids lanyards so they can use them whenever needed. I do try to find things with a soft light that won't bother others on the ride but just be bright enough for the kids. Your sister may choose to run out to Walmart or something to get a little light to help make this trip better. Or spend the money for a light up toy there in the park.

To overcome character fears, my kids decorate a mini clipbaord before we go and with Sharpies and 4x6 blank index cards in hand, we get autographs from anyone the kids want. The kids called it 'coloring the paper' and if they are only willing to go to the same one character over and over, we aren't out an expensive autograph book. For my kids, having a task when meeting the characters made it a little less scary. They could better anticipate how the meeting would go since they could relate to the coloring and knew it was short! It took quite a few index cards before anyone wanted to pose with a character but we have some really cute candids of the characters signing while my youngest waits and watches with such a serious look. Also, start with face characters...a little less intimidating. Judges Tent is nice since it's just one or 2 families at a time in the room and a little less crazy. The princesses are usually the only face characters there though, don't know how much that helps.

Hope any of this is helpful. I know it can make your heart sink a little to see your child upset at WDW. Take heart, there are ways to make the trip worthwhile for all, it just takes a little creativity and a LOT of patience. Lots of pixie dust to your sister's family and hopes that they find some magical moments as a family to take home with them.