For the dudes sitting as a lady stands...

Delgado

Active Member
Why does there have to be a "what if"? What if someone is lying about being injured, what if the stroller is full of crap from the parks, what if the child isn't sleeping but could stand themselves.
As a society we're so worried about justifying our actions because of what others are doing or not doing.
How about if you're physically capable just let someone else sit. Man or woman. Young or old. No you don't have to at all but if you're feeling up to it spread a little kindness.
After all, the guy with the stroller full of park souvenirs that you think needs to unfold i or put his kid in it, spent 300 dollars on his tantrum throwing kid who refuses to walk when his feet hurt just as bad as everyone else's. Or he just had a really good day. Don't worry about his stroller or his bags.
I'm just saying stop worrying about everyone else and do what you can and what you feel to be right and kind.
 

Andrew C

You know what's funny?
The men should offer seats to the women. If any of the women decline, that's fine too. It's not a matter of women being incapable of standing, it's a matter of anthropology rooted in history and biology. Men and women are different, no matter what the post-feminists would have you believe. One is not "better" and the other "worse," but they are different nonetheless.

Feminism used to argue that men and women are equal, which is something I wholeheartedly endorse. Fairly recently, the argument shifted to "men and women are the same," which is simply not true. Equality and sameness are different.

A reasonable post that is sure to offend people even so! lol
 

jaklgreen

Well-Known Member
My daughter and I had just missed the monorail and where waiting for the next. This was at Epcot so we were waiting in one of the "zones" for the next one. I have a foot issue so I was leaning against the railing on the side giving my foot a rest. Right before the monorail comes, this man with his son (around 11 years old) walk up and start to crowd us in. As soon as the door open, those of us who had been waiting started to walk in, well the son pushes past us to grab a spot on the seat and trying to save a spot for dad. Well I sat my butt down but my daughter did not get a spot. The dad and son pulled out some Mickey waffles that had been in their backpack since the morning(it was late afternoon) and started to eat them. I am sorry, but you don't send your kid to physically push people out of the way so that your fat butts can sit and eat on the monorail.
 

KeithVH

Well-Known Member
Way too much angst and overthinking here. Let me put it in terms most of you should understand. Offering up one's seat (or doing a myriad number of other things) is something a gentleman does. It is that simple. Four pages of discussion about it doesn't really show anything more than our current society's bastardized effect on the typical individual's thought process. This kind of discussion wouldn't have happened when I was younger, the answer is just obvious. So what, the world has changed. That doesn't mean our human concept of manners has.
 
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rob0519

Well-Known Member
My daughter and I had just missed the monorail and where waiting for the next. This was at Epcot so we were waiting in one of the "zones" for the next one. I have a foot issue so I was leaning against the railing on the side giving my foot a rest. Right before the monorail comes, this man with his son (around 11 years old) walk up and start to crowd us in. As soon as the door open, those of us who had been waiting started to walk in, well the son pushes past us to grab a spot on the seat and trying to save a spot for dad. Well I sat my butt down but my daughter did not get a spot. The dad and son pulled out some Mickey waffles that had been in their backpack since the morning(it was late afternoon) and started to eat them. I am sorry, but you don't send your kid to physically push people out of the way so that your fat butts can sit and eat on the monorail.

Well, we've all seen or experienced similar behavior, but would it have been any more acceptable to push people out of the way if the perpetrators did not have fat butts or were not eating? ;)
 

DryerLintFan

Premium Member
Why does there have to be a "what if"? What if someone is lying about being injured, what if the stroller is full of crap from the parks, what if the child isn't sleeping but could stand themselves.
As a society we're so worried about justifying our actions because of what others are doing or not doing.
How about if you're physically capable just let someone else sit. Man or woman. Young or old. No you don't have to at all but if you're feeling up to it spread a little kindness.
After all, the guy with the stroller full of park souvenirs that you think needs to unfold i or put his kid in it, spent 300 dollars on his tantrum throwing kid who refuses to walk when his feet hurt just as bad as everyone else's. Or he just had a really good day. Don't worry about his stroller or his bags.
I'm just saying stop worrying about everyone else and do what you can and what you feel to be right and kind.

This. Why does it matter who takes the seat? If you're able bodied, stand up and let someone else sit. If another able bodied person sits in the seat instead of someone you deem "worthy" then that's on them.

You cannot see a vast number of injuries or handicaps. To give your seat to a woman because she was born with ovaries but then to assume a guy with a bum leg is faking it is ridiculous.
 
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jaklgreen

Well-Known Member
Well, we've all seen or experienced similar behavior, but would it have been any more acceptable to push people out of the way if the perpetrators did not have fat butts or were not eating? ;)

Well , I have a fat butt but don't push anyone out of the way. And I sure as heck would not send my kid to push an older "big butt" lady and her child, that had been there before me, out of the way just so I could put my big butt down and eat on the monorail.
 

correcaminos

Well-Known Member
I do get slightly annoyed at young adults who do not offer seats. I did laugh to myself at a guy who offered my seat as I got up to offer it to a grandpa holding his 1yo (gosh he was cute, we had a nice chat). I laughed only because the guy didn't even see the baby really but as soon as I stood up he thought to offer. Yes I'm a woman, and no I don't mind. My youngest is 9yo now and needs to learn to stand. I'm good with public transport and say as much. I'd rather not give up my spot to sit truly.

I wish there could be a little more kindness in this world like that. If you are able and you see someone who looks like they need a seat, offer it. Don't sit there on your phone texting (not saying all do, I just saw it a few times and rolled my eyes).
 

carriebeth

Well-Known Member
As a woman who is truly very fit, tone, muscular (I work out hard for 2 hours a day everyday) and able bodied I can't imagine any woman ever taking an offer of kindness such as an offer of a seat as an insult or as someone underestimating my strength or ability as a woman. The number or times someone would feel this way would be so remote and unlikely that its a pretty flimsy excuse for not being a kind gentleman and just offering your seat or holding a door or whatever. Its just a fact that even though I am considerably strong for a woman, most if not all overweight unfit men or skinny scrawny lanky men are still going to be stronger than I am just because they are men. Although its not so much applicable as far as giving up a seat, as that isn't so much a matter of pure strength, it would be just plain ridiculous for me to get offended if a man ever offered me assistance with some matter that required strength because men are just stronger...its just biology. And if you think that the fact that times have changed means men should no longer have to offer a seat etc...well one reason times have changed is that too many people think its no longer important to have manners and show kindness allowing the world be become a ruder more uncaring place and more people to think such is just acceptable.

Now I will choose to stand if there is ever a chance a bus will be full because I feel there will always be some child, woman or man who is less capable than I or just more tired than I am who would appreciate a seat. I can tell you, though, there have been many times when I was obviously pregnant and holding another small child or baby and not even offered a seat or carrying a sleeping child and not offered a seat. Once I had two sleeping children, one draped over each of my shoulders and boarded a bus. After no one offered to get up I said "I am sorry but I am not going to be able to stand and hold both of these sleeping children" and was still ignored by everyone in a seat. I set the older of the two on the floor by my feet and it was only when she began crying having been awakened and set on the floor that someone rather begrudgingly got up so I could have the seat. That is definitely no longer a matter of feminism or anything else...its a matter of poor manners and an inability to have some fellow feeling or empathy for others.
 

Gabe1

Ivory Tower Squabble EST 2011. WINDMILL SURVIVOR
It's not an obligation, it's common courtesy and basic human decency. At least it used to be.

I am a female now into my AARP years. I in a heartbeat will give up my seat to a parent with a small kid or an elderly guest. Still I have seen others both male and female not. For those that are wired for common courtesy it is a given, for those wired for it is entitlement not so much. My son a 20 something always pops up for those who should be sitting. Just how we were raised and how I raised him to be.
 

Trisha Lynn

Well-Known Member
What we were talking about a young lady, should we have the same expectation that she give up her seat for an older gentleman?
Offering up one's seat (or doing a myriad number of other things) is something a gentleman does.

Yes, and they are also what a lady does. Also a woman, a dame, a broad, a gal, and a chick. Even sluts and can offer up their seats if someone requests it or they're feeling generous to someone who doesn't.

Do you offer your seat to people who are your age, and your gender?

Yes, if I don't think I need it at the time. Like, if I'm nearing my stop on public transit, I'll offer up my seat, I'll get up one stop earlier and offer as I start maneuvering towards the nearest/best exit.

Sitting makes men appear less manly.

Hah! Tell that to all the dudes who manspread. Sitting in such a way is the least manly thing I think a dude could do.

And speaking of the social contact, it gets weirdly complicated for me these days if it's a day where I have to use my cane or walking boot. Because I live in Minnesota where we have airlock-type entrances, a person who opens the first door for me may find me opening the second door for them because I've now just gotten to it first before they did. This gets more fun if it's a man who's older than I am, but not by much because who in this case should go first? The slightly older man, or the younger woman with a cane/walking boot?
 

ninjaprincesst

Well-Known Member
If you are sitting on the monorail, bus, boat, etc. and a woman, child or another dude holding his sleeping child gets on and has to stand as you sit, you may want to take a long, hard look in the mirror.

Society will never "evolve" to the point at which offering your seat to these folks will not be the right thing.

Saying so may make me unpopular but if anyone takes this to heart, well worth me saying so. It really does feel good to be a gentleman.
Speaking as a woman no 't give up your seat a woman person with kids , they had the same opportunity to get inline for the bus like you did, the fact that they come up at the last second is their own fault , the only people I would ever give a seat to are the elderly, they can't help being elderly, but these last minute charlies can help it.
 

jaklgreen

Well-Known Member
Speaking as a woman no 't give up your seat a woman person with kids , they had the same opportunity to get inline for the bus like you did, the fact that they come up at the last second is their own fault , the only people I would ever give a seat to are the elderly, they can't help being elderly, but these last minute charlies can help it.

When I had a foot injury, I had waited for the next bus to come so that I could sit down several times. I think if you are in that situation where you will be standing and you need to sit, then just let the ones behind you go and then you will be first on the next bus so that you can sit.
 

Trisha Lynn

Well-Known Member
When I had a foot injury, I had waited for the next bus to come so that I could sit down several times. I think if you are in that situation where you will be standing and you need to sit, then just let the ones behind you go and then you will be first on the next bus so that you can sit.

That only works if you're not in a hurry and the public transit comes by often enough. Other cities/towns are not so lucky

Also, since this year will be my first time, I have no idea about how frequently the WDW buses come during times where they're most likely to be standing room only. That might not be a good option for someone who is very foot-sore but not disabled.
 

jaklgreen

Well-Known Member
That only works if you're not in a hurry and the public transit comes by often enough. Other cities/towns are not so lucky

Also, since this year will be my first time, I have no idea about how frequently the WDW buses come during times where they're most likely to be standing room only. That might not be a good option for someone who is very foot-sore but not disabled.

Buses average about every 20 minutes. At busier times like at park closing they come closer together. And in my case, I was only talking about the buses at WDW, not a city bus.
 

Foltzy

Well-Known Member
While I always believe someone should give up their seat for someone injured, a child, pregnant women, or veterans, etc., that's just the way I was raised. I feel good knowing that someone needs the seat and got it because of my sacrificing. I've got stuff going for me, others might not, a seat doesn't mean squat to me.
However, this is basically how self-centered you are. If you would enjoy the seat more than getting up and giving it to someone in need, why would they get up(even though I disagree with not getting up)
 

Animaniac93-98

Well-Known Member
I agree with everything you're saying except the fact that you're offering your seat to a woman strictly on the grounds that she's a woman.

I'm a healthy 40 year old male and I will gladly give up my seat for someone who truly needs it: the elderly, a parent with a young child, someone who has an obvious need like a cast, cane or crutches (or if I saw them before we got on the bus and they obviously weren't moving as if they were totally healthy). Beyond that I feel that "first come, first served" is the rule of the day, and the only way to make a system like that fair to all. And that includes children above the age of 10 or so.

Exactly. These threads are always started by people who never deal with public transit at home, where being packed shouder-to-shoulder in rush hour traffic makes it impossible to ensure anyone who might need a seat (like the disabled or elderly) can get one, much less all women.

Disney's policy is to load wheelchair guests first, and then let everyone else on board in the order of who queued up first. It's the only fair and efficient option to get everyone on board short of running seperate wheelchair accessible buses.

If you want to offer someone a seat, that's fine, but save the chivalry lecture for some other place where 30,000 people aren't trying to get back to their hotel room at the same time.
 

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