Evilgidgit's Flicks Fixer-Upper Thread

DisneyManOne

Well-Known Member
I've got an idea for a re-write. Maybe we could collaborate on this: Ralph Breaks the Internet. A film that goes against the morals of the first film (apparently going Turbo is good now) and kinda destroys the characters of the first film. Keep Ralph's struggles with expressing himself, but use that as a springboard to discuss toxic masculinity on the Internet. That would make a much stronger film, wouldn't you say?
 

Evilgidgit

Well-Known Member
Original Poster
I've got an idea for a re-write. Maybe we could collaborate on this: Ralph Breaks the Internet. A film that goes against the morals of the first film (apparently going Turbo is good now) and kinda destroys the characters of the first film. Keep Ralph's struggles with expressing himself, but use that as a springboard to discuss toxic masculinity on the Internet. That would make a much stronger film, wouldn't you say?

I did enjoy Ralph Breaks the Internet, and the messages about anxiety were fantastic, but the movie should've been Vanellope's story. The going Turbo thing now being a "yeah, okay" pastime with no consequences made no sense, and Vanellope all of a sudden became very selfish and Turbo-esque in her choices and actions, which is kinda a bad thing in the arcade as both Ralph and King Candy demonstrated in the first film. In fact, most of the whole story is kinda sketchy to say the least. The internet has confusing rules and mostly serves not to tell a good story but rather just to make internet jokes. I feel Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 served as a good toxic masculinity movie, and in a way Wreck-It Ralph already did that via the selfish actions of Ralph and King Candy. If necessary, I'd potentially rework the whole internet subplot altogether, with Vanellope having to choose between following the rules of the arcade, or following King Candy's shadow by repeating history, choosing the radical Slaughter Race over the aged Sugar Rush. Ralph would be in the supporting role to help Vanellope.
 

DisneyManOne

Well-Known Member
I did enjoy Ralph Breaks the Internet, and the messages about anxiety were fantastic, but the movie should've been Vanellope's story. The going Turbo thing now being a "yeah, okay" pastime with no consequences made no sense, and Vanellope all of a sudden became very selfish and Turbo-esque in her choices and actions, which is kinda a bad thing in the arcade as both Ralph and King Candy demonstrated in the first film. In fact, most of the whole story is kinda sketchy to say the least. The internet has confusing rules and mostly serves not to tell a good story but rather just to make internet jokes. I feel Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 served as a good toxic masculinity movie, and in a way Wreck-It Ralph already did that via the selfish actions of Ralph and King Candy. If necessary, I'd potentially rework the whole internet subplot altogether, with Vanellope having to choose between following the rules of the arcade, or following King Candy's shadow by repeating history, choosing the radical Slaughter Race over the aged Sugar Rush. Ralph would be in the supporting role to help Vanellope.
How would we deal with the quickly-becoming-dated Internet humor and the self-congratulatory Disney shilling? Do we get rid of it altogether, or do we tone it down? I will admit, the scene where the Disney Princesses save Ralph was a pretty awesome moment in my book, and one of the things that really stands out to me about this movie.
 

Evilgidgit

Well-Known Member
Original Poster
How would we deal with the quickly-becoming-dated Internet humor and the self-congratulatory Disney shilling? Do we get rid of it altogether, or do we tone it down? I will admit, the scene where the Disney Princesses save Ralph was a pretty awesome moment in my book, and one of the things that really stands out to me about this movie.

The Disney Princesses would be the one thing I would keep in.
 

stitchcastle

Well-Known Member
I have rewritten a version of that before, but the only major change I did was that Forte was reworked as the Beast's dad. There isn't really much point to rewrite a remake.

I've had a version of a live action Beauty and the Beast in my head for quite a while myself. It would hew more closely to the original and would involve the Jim Henson company using puppets and animatronics for The Beast and the enchanted objects as opposed to extensive CGI.

Story-wise it would follow the 1992 animated feature much more closely save for the addition of Belle's Sister who would act as a mouthpiece for what the town/society expects of her, even directly setting Belle up with Gaston and then having a change of heart later and being the one to break Belle and Maurice out of the asylum's jail carriage.

The songs are also taken from the Broadway version, which means it would include "Human Again". But i'm torn on weather or not to use "If I Can't Love Her" as the Beast's song or have a better sung version of "Evermore" from the remake. "Home" also becomes a leitmotif between Belle and her sister.

My dream casting was having Anne Hathaway as Belle; Benjamin Walker as the Beast; Patrick Wilson as Gaston; Danny DeVito as Maurice; Megan Hilty as Marguerite (Belle's Sister) and Jack Black as Lefou (basically this movie would've come out in the mid-2000's) with the original 1992 cast reprising their roles for the enchanted objects.
 

DisneyManOne

Well-Known Member
I've had a version of a live action Beauty and the Beast in my head for quite a while myself. It would hew more closely to the original and would involve the Jim Henson company using puppets and animatronics for The Beast and the enchanted objects as opposed to extensive CGI.

Story-wise it would follow the 1992 animated feature much more closely save for the addition of Belle's Sister who would act as a mouthpiece for what the town/society expects of her, even directly setting Belle up with Gaston and then having a change of heart later and being the one to break Belle and Maurice out of the asylum's jail carriage.

The songs are also taken from the Broadway version, which means it would include "Human Again". But i'm torn on weather or not to use "If I Can't Love Her" as the Beast's song or have a better sung version of "Evermore" from the remake. "Home" also becomes a leitmotif between Belle and her sister.

My dream casting was having Anne Hathaway as Belle; Benjamin Walker as the Beast; Patrick Wilson as Gaston; Danny DeVito as Maurice; Megan Hilty as Marguerite (Belle's Sister) and Jack Black as Lefou (basically this movie would've come out in the mid-2000's) with the original 1992 cast reprising their roles for the enchanted objects.
Go with "If I Can't Love Her." It's a far-better song than "Evermore." Plus, it would show that Beast does feel remorse for his actions. In the context of the show, he's practically kicking himself after scaring Belle out of the West Wing and out of the castle. In the 2017 version, he just doesn't seem to care, instead he's just checking on his dang flower. And that ultimately makes the scene where he saves her from the wolves come out of left-field.
 

stitchcastle

Well-Known Member
Go with "If I Can't Love Her." It's a far-better song than "Evermore." Plus, it would show that Beast does feel remorse for his actions. In the context of the show, he's practically kicking himself after scaring Belle out of the West Wing and out of the castle. In the 2017 version, he just doesn't seem to care, instead he's just checking on his dang flower. And that ultimately makes the scene where he saves her from the wolves come out of left-field.

That's true, though I did think that putting "If I Can't Love Her" in where it originally is would sort of disrupt the pacing of the movie with the whole sequence from Be Our Guest until the Beast fights the wolves being told from Belle's point of view. Interjecting it with a big Beast-centric ballad sort of ruins the flow.

I do prefer the placement of "Evermore" being sung when the Beast sets Belle free because it's at a point in the story where we the audience as well as Belle have really gotten to know the Beast and seen him change. So he's expressing himself musically the same way the rest of the movie does.

also Anthony Evans' version in the live concert made me do an about face on the song lol.

Now imagine this version of the song being sung by a lonely Beast, roaming the halls of his empty castle, visiting each room where he had special moments with Belle and looking forlornly at the doors just waiting. "I'll fool myself she'll walk right in..." we then track away from the castle towards...

Belle, riding Phillippe fast through the dark forest. "I rage against the trials of love...." the magic Mirror lighting an enchanted path towards her father, Maurice. As Belle reaches him and picks him up. We intercut with the Beast singing as he makes his way up the castle towers.

The chorus sings as Belle and Maurice ride back to the village. Marguerite sees them coming to the cottage and hurriedly runs out to help Belle take their father in. the song slows down "wasting in my lonely tower...." as Belle walks the steps up to the house, she turns around. We cut to the Beast, it almost looks like they're looking at each other. As the song reaches its climax "I'll fool myself she'll walk right in..." the cameras move away from each of them as Belle turns to walk inside the cottage and the Beast is revealed to be in his balcony, in the castle. The final high note of the song turning into a distant roar as we move away from the castle.
 
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mickeyfan5534

Well-Known Member
That's true, though I did think that putting "If I Can't Love Her" in where it originally is would sort of disrupt the pacing of the movie with the whole sequence from Be Our Guest until the Beast fights the wolves being told from Belle's point of view. Interjecting it with a big Beast-centric ballad sort of ruins the flow.

I do prefer the placement of "Evermore" being sung when the Beast sets Belle free because it's at a point in the story where we the audience as well as Belle have really gotten to know the Beast and seen him change. So he's expressing himself musically the same way the rest of the movie does.

also Anthony Evans' version in the live concert made me do an about face on the song lol.

Now imagine this version of the song being sung by a lonely Beast, roaming the halls of his empty castle, visiting each room where he had special moments with Belle and looking forlornly at the doors just waiting. "I'll fool myself she'll walk right in..." we then track away from the castle towards...

Belle, riding Phillippe fast through the dark forest. "I rage against the trials of love...." the magic Mirror lighting an enchanted path towards her father, Maurice. As Belle reaches him and picks him up. We intercut with the Beast singing as he makes his way up the castle towers.

The chorus sings as Belle and Maurice ride back to the village. Marguerite sees them coming to the cottage and hurriedly runs out to help Belle take their father in. the song slows down "wasting in my lonely tower...." as Belle walks the steps up to the house, she turns around. We cut to the Beast, it almost looks like they're looking at each other. As the song reaches its climax "I'll fool myself she'll walk right in..." the cameras move away from each of them as Belle turns to walk inside the cottage and the Beast is revealed to be in his balcony, in the castle. The final high note of the song turning into a distant roar as we move away from the castle.

My hot take on the remake has always been Evermore is a fantastic Beast song on the level of If I Can’t Love Her and both can and should exist as mirrors to each other.
 

Evilgidgit

Well-Known Member
Original Poster
Would rewriting the Fantastic Beasts films interest you or are they on the same terms with Star Wars and DC?

It has crossed my mind to write FB, removing all of the Grindelwald stuff and making it more based around catching the animals, but keep the anti-witch stuff in. I haven't seen Crimes of Grindelwald, but I've heard it is such a colossal train wreck, I don't really want to go near it.

If you have any ideas, please share them.
 

Suchomimus

Well-Known Member
If you have any ideas, please share them.
If you mean for the film, then I’m thinking about changing the beast roster; having the designs be more consistent with the book’s description, replacing the Nundu, Graphorn and Doxy with original beasts, and giving Frank two wings instead of six.
But if you’re looking for movie suggestions, then I would like to see you tackle some of Pixar’s weaker entries.
 

DisneyManOne

Well-Known Member
What about the prequels? To me, Revenge of the Sith is the only tolerable prequel; and it's good enough to stand up as its own film. Frankly, I feel you don't even need to watch the other two, because Sith tells you everything you need to know about the prequels without any filler.

How would any of you guys go about fixing The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones?
 

Evilgidgit

Well-Known Member
Original Poster
What about the prequels? To me, Revenge of the Sith is the only tolerable prequel; and it's good enough to stand up as its own film. Frankly, I feel you don't even need to watch the other two, because Sith tells you everything you need to know about the prequels without any filler.

How would any of you guys go about fixing The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones?

Well, there are a few things that need fixing:
-Less fanservice, more character development.
-Tone don't the CGI clusterbomb and make the films look more convincing.
-Jar Jar Binks can stay, but for the love of sanity, don't make him the Senate rep for Naboo or give emergency powers to Palpatine!
-Make the romance between Anakin and Padme more convincing, and not so wooden.
-Make the Jedi not so stupid. Their total detachment from everything around them made them blind and ignorant to the rise of the Emperor. No wonder they got exterminated.
-Age up Anakin in PM, and don't make him so whiny, pretentious, murderous, self-aggrandizing, dislikeable, stroppy, psychotic, furious, and frankly stupid! Obi-Wan said Anakin was seduced by the dark side, not turned out to be an angry raving lunatic destined to bring balance to the Force. Seriously, Anakin's joining of the Dark Side goes basically like this:
-Palpatine: "Wanna join the dark side?"
-Anakin: "Sure, okay."


I may expand on this some more in the future.
 

DisneyManOne

Well-Known Member
If I may, I would like to post my own "fix-it" for a film that will more than likely need it: Cats. I'm sure we're all aware of what a trainwreck Cats will be when it hits theaters this December, but I still think there could be a way to translate it well to film. First of all, make it animated, because if the trailer is any indication, having humans play cats does not translate well to live-action film.

~ ~ ~

Cats
based on the musical by Andrew Lloyd Webber,
which was based on T.S. Eliot's "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats"
Layout by DisneyManOne


Somewhere in the world, a young Boy is getting ready for bed. However, his train of thought is derailed by his curious kitten, Victoria -- an all-white cat, freshly new and learning to experience the world. Victoria is a playful young kitten, and the Boy is devoted to her. The two have a good time playing a bit before the Boy's mother comes in to tuck him in. It's a peaceful night. The moon is shining bright, full and round in the sky. But just as the boy's eyes begin to droop...

...Victoria jumps out of the window and rushes out into the street! The Boy, startled, rushes out of his house and follows her through the streets of his town ("Overture") and into an old junkyard. Here, various cats have congregated, as if for a meeting. Much to the Boy's surprise, these cats can talk and sing. Apparently, these cats call themselves Jellicles, and they explain to the newcomer, Victoria, what it means to be a Jellicle cat. ("Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats") However, the revelry is interrupted when a cat notices the Boy watching. A silver tabby named Munkustrap approaches the boy, and asks if he's never heard of a Jellicle cat. When the boy asks "What's a Jellicle cat?", the cats react in shock and indignation. But nonetheless, the cats explain that being a Jellicle is being among the highest order of cat in the world. It means living up to your three names. When the Boy expresses confusion of that notion, the cats explain to him that a cat has three names: one that their human owners call them, a more dignified name, and a name that only the cat knows. ("The Naming of Cats")

Weirded out by the explanation, the Boy asks if he can take Victoria back home. But much to his surprise, Victoria speaks to him and tells him "I want to stay. Don't you know what tonight is? Tonight is the night of the Jellicle Ball!" Confused by such a process, Munkustrap -- being something of a storyteller for the Jellicles -- explains to the Boy that the Jellicle Ball is a special event that happens only once a year, and it has a special purpose. On this night, the Jellicles' wise leader, Old Deuteronomy, will choose one of the Jellicles to go up to the "Heaviside Layer" so that they can be reborn. Munkustrap goes on to explain that every Jellicle considers it a high honor to go up to the Heaviside Layer, and pretty much every cat gathered has hopes of going up themselves.

To demonstrate his point, Munkustrap suggests that the Boy meet some of the cats who hope to be reborn, first introducing Jennyanydots, an old "gumbie cat" -- a cat that seemingly does nothing but sit around the house all day. But when her human owners go to sleep, she sheds this lazy facade and sets about dealing with any vermin in her own unique way. She has the mice tutored in "music, crocheting and tatting" and makes sure they have a proper diet, and has the cockroaches enlisted in a scout troop in order to "prevent them from idle and wanted destroyment." ("The Old Gumbie Cat") The Boy is tickled by Jennyanydot's story, and suggests that she is far too important to be reborn. She should stay and make sure the mice and cockroaches don't break their habits. Just then, who should arrive but the Rum Tum Tugger, a wild and rambunctious cat who is noted for his picky and contrarian lifestyle. As the cats explain, "he will do as he do do, and there's no doing anything about it!" ("The Rum Tum Tugger")

However, the Tugger's revelry is interrupted by the arrival of Grizabella, a "glamour cat" who has since been shunned by the Jellicles. Victoria, being the youngest cat present, tries to reach out and touch her, but the adults pull her back. Two of the women of the tribe, Demeter and Bombalurina, explain to the Boy that Grizabella left and shunned the tribe in her youth. Now in old age, and with her beauty long since gone, Grizabella haunts the landscape. She has tried many times to regain the favor of the Jellicles, but they have always shunned her. After all, she turned her back on the tribe, and the Jellicles are a very proud tribe. But before the Boy can ask any more questions, Bustopher Jones appears on the scene! Bustopher Jones is an obese cat, but nonetheless is the toast of society, and very well respected by the Jellicles. ("Bustopher Jones - The Cat About Town") However, the mood is broken again by a loud crash! Fearing it to be the work of a being known as "Macavity", the cats scatter! The Boy is all alone in the junkyard. The Boy is unnerved by giggling. Suddenly, two cats spring up from the piles of junk and introduce themselves. Their names are Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, and they tell the Boy of their lives spreading mischief and causing destruction. ("Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer") Their song is catchy and jazzy, and the Boy finds himself dancing along! However, the other cats, seeing that the noise was these two thiefs, soon chase them away.

Just then, one of the cats, Mr. Mistoffelees, senses something on the wind. Old Deuteronomy is coming! As the cats prepare themselves, Munkustrap and the Tugger tell the Boy all about the beloved leader of the Jellicles. ("Old Deuteronomy") At last, Deuteronomy arrives and the cats greet him with respect. Deuteronomy is kind towards the Boy and to Victoria, and encourages the Boy to stay. With Deuteronomy here, the Ball can begin! It's a spectacular sight as the cats dance under the light of the full moon. ("The Jellicle Ball") However, at the conclusion of the dance, Grizabella appears again. Once again, Victoria tries to reach out to her, but is prevented. The Jellicles slink away, leaving only Deuteronomy and the Boy watching her. Alone, Grizabella tries to capture some of the magic of the ball, but she's too old, trying to dance is painful, and alone, it is pointless. She leaves, recalling "a time I knew what happiness was." ("Memory - Part 1") She does not notice the ever-sympathetic Deuteronomy reaching out to her.

Alone, the Boy asks Deuteronomy "Was it a good idea to cast out Grizabella entirely?" Deuteronomy responds "Looking back, I fear it was a horrible decision." Deuteronomy goes on to say "I was just thinking about what she said about knowing what happiness was. I feel we've all forgotten what happiness truly is." Victoria, having returned to her owner, expresses her opinions. "It must be a remarkable experience to go up to the Heaviside Layer. Maybe the cat chosen will be a cat who knows what happiness is."

The cats, having returned, bring on Gus, an old "theatre cat" who was a prominent actor in his prime. He reminisces about his time on stage, having received great acclaim and success. ("Gus the Theater Cat") The Boy asks Gus about his time in the theater. Gus tells him that although Firefroefiddle was his greatest role, his personal favorite was the Great Rumpus Cat in a play called "The Awful Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles". The Boy asks if he could still play the part, and -- with the encouragement of the rest of the tribe -- Gus agrees, and enlists the tribe to help him perform. Munkustrap serves as narrator, Tugger plays bagpipes and the rest of the tribe -- save for Deuteronomy and the Boy -- play the dogs. The story of the Awful Battle is about two rival dog clans -- the Pekes and the Pollicles -- who have an altercation in the middle of the street, which is soon joined by two other clans, the Pugs and the Poms. Such a fight is broken up by the arrival of the Great Rumpus Cat, who is able to scare all the dogs away. The Boy applauds the number, saying that Gus has still got a few good years left in him. Charmed by the Boy's words, Gus considers giving theater another try, much to the joy of the Jellicles.

The merry mood is heightened by the arrival of Skimbleshanks the railway cat, a cat who makes sure the train that carries the mail is able to get to its destination on time. ("Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat") But, as with everything at the Jellicle Ball, the mood is shattered once again by another crash. This time, it truly is Macavity! He sweeps into the junkyard and makes off with Old Deuteronomy! As the adults give chase, the Boy and Victoria are left alone with Demeter and Bombalurina, who explain exactly who Macavity is and why he is so feared among the Jellicles. ("Macavity") At the conclusion of the song, Old Deuteronomy...or at least what looks like Old Deuteronomy...comes back. But, Victoria is smart enough to claw at the "fur", revealing it to be an old robe. It's Macavity in disguise! As Macavity gloats about how he'll never reveal where Deuteronomy went off to, an enraged Munkustrap leaps upon Macavity and the two fight. Alas, Macavity is able to knock Munkustrap out, thus prompting all the Jellicles to take a swipe at Macavity. In a last-ditch effort to escape, Macavity cuts the power to the junkyard, killing the lights...but electrifying himself in the process.

Macavity is no more. But, the bigger problem remains. How will the Jellicles get Old Deuteronomy back? The Tugger suggests they call upon Mr. Mistoffelees, a cat magician who is a master with disappearance and re-appearance. ("Magical Mr. Mistoffelees") With his assistant, Cassandra, at his side, Mr. Mistoffelees is indeed able to bring Old Deuteronomy back!

The jubilance is cut short as Victoria and the Boy notice that the sun will soon rise. The night is almost over! The Jellicle Ball will soon come to an end! And that means it's time for Old Deuteronomy to make that fateful choice. Just then, Grizabella returns for a third time. The cats again shun her, but the Boy and Victoria persuade them to listen to her, an offer to which Deuteronomy agrees. Grizabella sings her shame of how she turned on the Jellicles, and how she's lost hope for a new life. ("Memory - Part 2") With Victoria giving aid, Grizabella is able to finish her song, and the choice is clear -- she shall go up to the Heaviside Layer to be reborn! As the cats see her off ("Journey to the Heaviside Layer"), a tire in the junkyard stretches ever-skyward and takes Grizabella and Deuteronomy high above the ground. A magical staircase appears in the clouds. Deuteronomy encourages Grizabella to take that fateful step and she disappears.

The sun is just starting to rise. The Boy and Victoria thank Old Deuteronomy for a splendid evening and prepare to head home. But Deuteronomy stops them for a brief moment, and encourages the Boy to come by for next year's Jellicle Ball. Tonight, he has become a good friend of the Jellicles and as such, Deuteronomy offers him the secrets to how he can make more Jellicle friends. ("The Ad-dressing of Cats") As the song finishes, the Boy wakes up. The whole experience with the Jellicles must have been a dream. He asks Victoria, who is once again mute, if what had happened the night before truly did happen. As the Boy prepares to head downstairs for breakfast, a meow catches his attention. He looks out his window to see Old Deuteronomy sitting outside his house, who gives him a wink.

~ ~ ~

What do you guys think? Do you think this outline could work well for a Cats-based movie? Frankly, I may do an outline for a Starlight Express movie next. I've always thought that that particular musical would work well in the style of the cheesy hand-drawn animated films of the 80s!
 

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