Disney Bride & Groom Forego Catering, Host Mickey & Minnie instead

[Wendy Pleakley]

All weddings are different but it's pretty much a standard that food is provided.

If it's not, I'd expect that to be VERY clearly stated, and I would expect the wedding schedule would say "between x and x time guests can purchase food at one of the following locations".

With that info people can decide whether or not to attend.

Where was the alleged wedding held? At a WDW resort? I mean, it's like "go find food but I hope you made your ADR six months ago otherwise it's the vending machines for you".

 

[Dear Prudence]

I do have a certain level of respect for those that elope and actually do make it only about themselves.

...or have a small local public park wedding that takes about 45 minutes costs $100-$300.

I definitely think that those kinds of ceremonies can be more meaningful, because it's way less about the gratuitous displays of wealth and more about the seminal rite of passage type event.

 

[DryerLintFan]

All weddings are different but it's pretty much a standard that food is provided.

If it's not, I'd expect that to be VERY clearly stated, and I would expect the wedding schedule would say "between x and x time guests can purchase food at one of the following locations".

With that info people can decide whether or not to attend.

Where was the alleged wedding held? At a WDW resort? I mean, it's like "go find food but I hope you made your ADR six months ago otherwise it's the vending machines for you".

Don't forget to make your Genie+ reservation for the vending machines

 

[jloucks]

All weddings are different but it's pretty much a standard that food is provided.

If it's not, I'd expect that to be VERY clearly stated, and I would expect the wedding schedule would say "between x and x time guests can purchase food at one of the following locations".

With that info people can decide whether or not to attend.

Where was the alleged wedding held? At a WDW resort? I mean, it's like "go find food but I hope you made your ADR six months ago otherwise it's the vending machines for you".

I would add, if there is no food/drink, keep the entire shindig short!

If the wedding/reception is local and only 30 minutes max (I love these) then hey, no food is a minor issue. Nobody is going to be hungry for very long. "I do". "I do" Bing-bada-boom and done. No problemo no foodo.

However, if you're rocking a 2+ hours juggernaut with a foodless reception over lunch or dinner time? Pfft, come on now. Now you're just trolling your guests.

Run to the vending machines? That is some master level trolling. The thought of telling a guest that, to me, is horrifying.

 

[Californian Elitist]

I just reserved my spot for my friend’s wedding last night, which will be held at the San Diego Safari Park (and the invite includes park admission for the day…hello, giraffes!). I was ecstatic to see a drop-down menu of food to choose from. I chose short ribs.

No vending machines over here. Couldn’t be happier.

 

[MickeyLuv'r]

If I was invited to this wedding under these “unclear” meal pretenses, my wife would stay while I run out and get a dozen White Castle sliders, come back in, proceed to eat them at my table, leave the boxes in a pile, go home and stop payment on the check…I can be tacky too and it would be the best $35.00 for the stop payment fee I ever spent.

I was at a wedding a like this!

The bride's mom did not want children at wedding while groom's family custom was always children=family. Nobody gets left behind. The bride's mom very begrudgingly allowed the 5 children but was borderline hostile to groom's entire family. It was a weird wedding, because she wouldn't even talk to groom's extended family for the entire weekend. Plus, 2 of the 5 children were the flower girls. She expected the flower girls present, but the flower girl's autistic brother was supposed to stay hidden in the care of a complete stranger. She could not understand why that would have sent him into a full panic.

The children were well behaved.

One way mom tried to be unwelcoming was through the food. The meal was not very good. I don't recall what it was, but bride's mom clearly aimed to serve food the kids wouldn't enjoy, even many adults found it too spicy/not food they'd eat.

So someone ran out to get a little food the kids could eat. Again, I forget the specifics, but everyone wanted the 'kid food' he brought back! He ended up making TWO trips for 'kid food,' because it was SO much better than the wedding food. Everyone was just like, " I would LOVE some french fries right now!"

It was a weird wedding, but the kid food part was memorable.

 

[Smiley/OCD]

My wife and I just had a reunion with the old record store chain we worked for…we had about 50 people…spent about $300.00 for burgers, hot dogs, ribs and buns…someone brought the sodas, someone brought the beer, etc. I paid my caterer friend $100.00 to be the “grill meister” and had an AWESOME time! No one went home hungry or thirsty. It can be done! And they still would’ve had $$$ left over for Mickey & Minnie.
Just a weird situation…judging by the bride, I give it 3 years (and I think I’m being generous) lol

 

[MickeyLuv'r]

I expect that, and I expect the same at others weddings, too. It’s not about me. It’s about the bride and groom. You are a familiar face, friend, family member there to celebrate the bond of love. Not to be the one who is only showing up because food is there.

Actually...that's not quite correct.

Traditionally, the a wedding is about the community. The traditional idea of a wedding is to bring two families together, and also to - I'm not quite sure how to word it - but to let the community know the couple has undergone an important transformation in their lives and that transformation = they need to be treated differently.

It is not unlike a wake/funeral. Or even a graduation/coming of age ceremony. Without a funeral, many people actually have a hard(er) time accepting that the person has passed away. A coming-of-age celebration also = this person must be treated differently. They are no longer a child.


Many have argued, that from a sociological perspective, the lack of a society-wide coming-of-age custom in America culture = confusion. That confusion is a factor in many of the societal problems we face.

Humans are social creatures, and we crave closure. Weddings exist in just about every culture that has ever existed because they serve a societal function. Weddings are central to many of Disney's own fairy tales, "They lived happily ever after."

 

[Pepper's Ghost]

I also don't get this connection between a meal and getting a gift. Once again, I gift people because I love them or at least really like them, NOT because they fed me. Why not just skip it if the relationship is so shallow that they only way you'll contribute is if it's reciprocated??

I can't speak for everyone, but I know many feel like what I'm going to explain. I previously said I've never been to a wedding where food or a formal dinner wasn't served. With that said, I personally want to help the bride and groom with the expense of the wedding, so I make sure that I always give a gift that will cover the cost of the meals of who I'm with. If I'm by myself, which I've done, I make sure I give enough to cover at least one meal plus extra as a congrats gift. If I bring someone with me, I give a gift large enough to cover two meals plus extra as a gift for the couple. I don't demand a meal in exchange for a cash gift. I give a gift large enough to cover the cost my attendance creates plus extra to help the couple. Most people I know do this. If the event is held at a ritzy restaurant or hall, my gift is larger to help cover the cost. If I was invited to only a ceremony with no reception, I'd still give a gift but it would be smaller since the couple is not incurring as much cost, and my attendance costs them nothing.

The part about this Mickey & Minnie nonsense is that it seems they had a reception which most people would've assumed would come with food, but they basically told them that we spent the food money to have people in costumes, so go find the vending machine down the hall. Like @jloucks mentioned, that's low-class trolling the people you supposedly love, or at least care about a little. If there was no reception, and the whole thing was about an hour including the rodents attending and was clearly stated in the invitation (2pm-3pm), I'd be fine with attending and dropping off a small cash gift for the happy couple, and leave for a nice dinner.

Having a reception where your guests have to fend for themselves is really sticking it to them. It's beyond selfish into the realm of rude.

 

[Pepper's Ghost]

A wedding is literally all about me. That is the entire purpose of a wedding.

Ever seen the show Bridezilla? I only saw the commercials for it, but holy cow, this attitude was exactly how those women acted in the commercials. Do you care nothing about the people you invited to your wedding? Of course a wedding is about the marrying couple. Everyone knows that, but I'd think that couple would be humbled by the love shown to them on their big day... not stomping up and down that "THIS DAY IS ALL ABOUT ME!!" This one statement tells me a whole lot about you.

 

[WondersOfLife]

This one statement tells me a whole lot about you.

"If there's no food I'm not going" tells me a whole lot about you. ;-)

 

[WondersOfLife]

I would like to clarify: I had a BBQ buffet, dessert bar, chip bar, a whole bunch of soda options, sparkling grapejuice bar, and a cheesecake+wedding cake at my wedding venue. We had plenty of food for our people, and everyone was happy.

But again, I don't see anything wrong with their decision.

 

[Dear Prudence]

I just reserved my spot for my friend’s wedding last night, which will be held at the San Diego Safari Park (and the invite includes park admission for the day…hello, giraffes!). I was ecstatic to see a drop-down menu of food to choose from. I chose short ribs.

No vending machines over here. Couldn’t be happier.

I am clearly friends with the wrong people

 

[eliza61nyc]

Ever seen the show Bridezilla? I only saw the commercials for it, but holy cow, this attitude was exactly how those women acted in the commercials. Do you care nothing about the people you invited to your wedding? Of course a wedding is about the marrying couple. Everyone knows that, but I'd think that couple would be humbled by the love shown to them on their big day... not stomping up and down that "THIS DAY IS ALL ABOUT ME!!" This one statement tells me a whole lot about you.

Lol, that show was my guilty pleasure, that being said it was a reality show so of course, none of it was real
Now of course like every thing else the "all about me" can be taken to the extreme but for many celebrations there is the one person who, for lack of a better description it is all about them. Yes at my graduation from grad school it was all about me. I got to pick the restaurant, the food etc. I do not agree that it automatically implies the person is selfish or immature.
I just returned from Vegas to celebrate my sister in laws 60th birthday. The venue was a casino pool party, if you didn't like it, it was not changed. We didn't change it for the seniors and it was no kids under 16. Now again, that was clearly communicated.
I have absolutely no problem with saying I had the wedding I wanted, it fit my late husband's and my style. We have a number of different religions in my family, we weren't making changes to appease my grandparents sensibilities, we weren't changing the menu to appease someone's allergies.
Personally I think the opposite, lol you get the word a family member is getting married and they have to start taking in the entire families concerns yikes

Like I said before, they are not summons to appear before the monarch. If you rsvp yes, then yep I think one should let the couple do their thing however weird.

Lol you can always talk about them later

 

[Pepper's Ghost]

"If there's no food I'm not going" tells me a whole lot about you. ;-)

I said nothing of the sort. In fact, here's a quote of mine from earlier in the thread that states the opposite...

If the invitation clearly stated no food would be served, then I'd probably go, but put $20 or $50 in an envelope with a Post-It that said "congrats on your thing". I wouldn't be upset though because it was clear.

Here's another time I said the same...

If there was no reception, and the whole thing was about an hour including the rodents attending and was clearly stated in the invitation (2pm-3pm), I'd be fine with attending and dropping off a small cash gift for the happy couple, and leave for a nice dinner.

Stop misstating or in this case making things up completely to fit your narrative.

 

[Pepper's Ghost]

Lol, that show was my guilty pleasure, that being said it was a reality show so of course, none of it was real
Now of course like every thing else the "all about me" can be taken to the extreme but for many celebrations there is the one person who, for lack of a better description it is all about them. Yes at my graduation from grad school it was all about me. I got to pick the restaurant, the food etc. I do not agree that it automatically implies the person is selfish or immature.
I just returned from Vegas to celebrate my sister in laws 60th birthday. The venue was a casino pool party, if you didn't like it, it was not changed. We didn't change it for the seniors and it was no kids under 16. Now again, that was clearly communicated.
I have absolutely no problem with saying I had the wedding I wanted, it fit my late husband's and my style. We have a number of different religions in my family, we weren't making changes to appease my grandparents sensibilities, we weren't changing the menu to appease someone's allergies.
Personally I think the opposite, lol you get the word a family member is getting married and they have to start taking in the entire families concerns yikes

Like I said before, they are not summons to appear before the monarch. If you rsvp yes, then yep I think one should let the couple do their thing however weird.

Lol you can always talk about them later

I apologize. I don't think I stated anything that countered what you said. I agreed that it is all about the couple, or guest of honor in your example. I'm just saying that usually the person(s) of honor appreciate the attendance of loved ones... enough to provide some kind of meal and make it a nice experience for them. Doesn't mean it's not about that person(s). I was humbled at my wedding. I was humbled at my college graduation, and a few other times of how awesome everyone was. I spent time talking to each person at any event I have been honored, and I appreciated their attendance. I'm just saying that if you have a 3 or 4+hr event, show your appreciation to your guests by providing a meal of some kind. It's still about the guest of honor. Just don't have such a long event and ignore the guests either literally, or by not making the event enjoyable. It's not ONLY about the guest of honor. Heck, I have an annual Halloween costume party and I have it catered with a full bar.

 

[Magic Crush Drop]

Step 1: Don't go on Twitter.
Step 2: Actually, that's it.

Thanks for the advice dude, never thought of doing that ever in my life.

 

[Club Cooloholic]

Ever seen the show Bridezilla? I only saw the commercials for it, but holy cow, this attitude was exactly how those women acted in the commercials. Do you care nothing about the people you invited to your wedding? Of course a wedding is about the marrying couple. Everyone knows that, but I'd think that couple would be humbled by the love shown to them on their big day... not stomping up and down that "THIS DAY IS ALL ABOUT ME!!" This one statement tells me a whole lot about you.

My wedding I had to make the rounds with my wife, shake hands talk to family members and friends, some who has traveled far or we had not seen for awhile. Some were people we were close with some it was relatives from my wife's side that I was meeting for the first time,and the same with my wife for people from my side. We talked to so many people we missed the first course, and that was ok. Because, the part where it was all about me was the ceremony. The reception is about sharing the love with friends.

 

[WondersOfLife]

Stop misstating or in this case making things up completely to fit your narrative.

You seem upset. I’ll leave you alone.

 

[Diamond Dot]

When my sister in law got married we got the wedding list, we all bought lovely presents from it, but, at the wedding breakfast my mother in law decided she wanted to do something she saw on a film or something. It's where everyone pins money on the bride's dress, she didn't realise they did it instead of giving presents and only she pinned money on because the rest of us thought she was being ridiculous. my sister in law wasn't keen on it, but, went along with it and she had to put up with the embarrasment of having one £10 note pinned to her dress all evening.