I think the important thing is that you still get enjoyment from music, even if you aren't making it yourself. I can only speak for myself, but my goal as a music teacher wasn't to turn all the kids into little musicians. It was to get them to love music. And it doesn't have to be ALL music....I can't stand rap, and I don't really like opera. There are some who really relate to those genres, and that's great, they just aren't for me. But I can appreciate the art of it without listening to them myself.
My father couldn't carry a tune in a bushel basket, and my husband is pretty tone deaf himself, as is A, but E would be a better singer than I am if she got training. Unfortunately, she had horrible music teachers who killed any interest she had in making music, so singing along with the radio is about the extent to which she is involved in music. She used to do musical theater when she was younger, but felt like she doesn't have enough time to devote to it now that she's in high school and has homework. So she stopped doing that, and there is no chorus or band here through the school, so the only way for her to get music is to take the music classes at school with the awful teacher (there's only one good music teacher there, and E never got her and there's no guarantee she'd get her if she did music now.) and she's much more into chemistry and biology and math, etc....she would have to drop something she loves to take music. I would love for her to have the same love of music I do, and I wish that she had had decent teachers who would have fostered that, but at least I know she still loves musicals and Disney music. She still gets enjoyment out of the music she DOES listen to, and that's the important thing. She's never going to be one to sing professionally, but as long as we can still sing Disney songs or Phantom of the Opera while we bake together, etc, I'm glad that music is a part of her life.
It's great that you have those memories of your father, and you can still enjoy music personally. Not everyone has to be a professional. I actually really hate singing solo. I'm classically trained and I CAN, but I really don't like to. It's a huge source of anxiety. I would much rather be in the chorus. Just enjoy what you enjoy, whether that's singing, playing an instrument, or just listening. The audience plays a HUGE role in music...playing to an unappreciative audience is SOOOO hard. It's the listeners who really make or break a performance.