Travelling with a new partner.

[brucie]

Hi everyone.

I am headed back to Disney World with my new partner for the first time. I have just been recently divorced from my wife of 10 years, we've been separated for a year and a half but I have so many great memories of us at Disney together. I have a slight fear that I am going to be flooded with emotions and memories of being there with my ex-wife.

It's a complicated story but I will always love my ex, I'm hoping it will just help me move on. I don't want it to be weird or awkward with my new partner though. Maybe I'm just being crazy and over thinking things.

Has anyone else been through anything similar?

 

[JasonDeyoung]

Hi everyone.

I am headed back to Disney World with my new partner for the first time. I have just been recently divorced from my wife of 10 years, we've been separated for a year and a half but I have so many great memories of us at Disney together. I have a slight fear that I am going to be flooded with emotions and memories of being there with my ex-wife.

It's a complicated story but I will always love my ex, I'm hoping it will just help me move on. I don't want it to be weird or awkward with my new partner though. Maybe I'm just being crazy and over thinking things.

Has anyone else been through anything similar?

When you arrive and enter the work of magic and Disney you'll be so busy having a great time and making new memories you prob won't even think twice about it. I had the same fears when I'd bring a new gf granted that's obv not the exact same as your situation. I wouldn't sweat it. If they are good memory's just smile and remember the good times and cherish all the new memories.,

 

[ajrwdwgirl]

I have not been in this situation, but I would advise trying to do some totally new experiences with your new partner. Try a new restaurant you've wanted to try, take a tour (the Behind the Seed is great and not too long). You don't have to do everything new but create some new experiences to compliment the old. It might make your partner feel good too to hear that it is something new that you are experiencing with her so she doesn't feel like you are reliving old memories either. But most of all relax and have fun!

 

[catmom46]

Hi everyone.

I am headed back to Disney World with my new partner for the first time. I have just been recently divorced from my wife of 10 years, we've been separated for a year and a half but I have so many great memories of us at Disney together. I have a slight fear that I am going to be flooded with emotions and memories of being there with my ex-wife.

It's a complicated story but I will always love my ex, I'm hoping it will just help me move on. I don't want it to be weird or awkward with my new partner though. Maybe I'm just being crazy and over thinking things.

Has anyone else been through anything similar?

The fact that you're even worried about this shows you're very self-aware and I'm sure even if old memories pop up, you'll know enough to let them flow through and then move on with new experiences with your new partner. As long as you don't dwell, you'll be fine. I agree with Jason that you'll most likely be busy making wonderful new memories instead. Have fun!

 

[brucie]

Thanks guys. I think I just needed that little bit of positive reinforcement

 

[Weather_Lady]

I haven't been in the same situation, but I imagine it's a little like one I have been part of -- visiting WDW for the first time after the death of a family member (in my case, my mother) who'd been there with me on every preceding trip. Everywhere I turned I seemed to see her, and to remember some vacation memory associated with that spot. Sometimes it was hard to bite my tongue, to avoid bringing her up constantly and distracting/depressing the rest of my family.

Of course you will be flooded with memories, and that's okay -- go ahead and experience the joy and pain that comes with them! At the same time, keep reminding yourself that the memories aren't over -- you're going to continue to make happy memories at Disney World with your new partner. If you don't want it to be awkward for your new partner, then just be sure that when you want to talk about a memory with them, you're talking about things you've loved about Walt Disney World (as opposed to things you loved about your former wife). Focus on "I" statements instead of "we (my former wife and I)" statements. (For example, instead of, "My former wife and I always used to stop here for snacks - it was one of our favorite traditions," say, "I've always loved stopping here for a snack - I think I've done it every time I've visited WDW! Are you hungry?")

It also wouldn't hurt to express to your new partner how special Walt Disney World has always been to you, and how eagerly you are looking forward to making new memories there with them.

 

[JIMINYCR]

Like previous posters have advised I'd try doing entirely different things, switch up the routine you had established before and even stay at a different resort so right from the start you have a completely new feel and start to your Disney vacation. If something pops up that begins to remind you of your ex.... look at your new partner, smile, give her a kiss and say ILY , that will take your mind off your ex. If she says whyd you do that ?, just say you love being in Disney with her.

 

[ArielLover]

Hi everyone.

I am headed back to Disney World with my new partner for the first time. I have just been recently divorced from my wife of 10 years, we've been separated for a year and a half but I have so many great memories of us at Disney together. I have a slight fear that I am going to be flooded with emotions and memories of being there with my ex-wife.

It's a complicated story but I will always love my ex, I'm hoping it will just help me move on. I don't want it to be weird or awkward with my new partner though. Maybe I'm just being crazy and over thinking things.

Has anyone else been through anything similar?

Brucie,

Yes I have lived this one. I was married 20 years and went to Disney with my ex every other year with our daughter since she was 9. Then we continued to go without our daughter. We had plans to celebrate our 20 year anniversary there, 2 months before leaving she announced she was having an affair and wanted a divorce (on my 40th birthday).

I met my someone new soon after and we went 2 years later for our first vacation together. We were able to use tickets and some other things from the cancelled anniversary trip. I went out of my way to avoid things I did with my ex. My ex and I had loved the Wilderness Lodge, so my girlfriend and I stayed at POFQ (I had never even visited there before). We had a great time. Did some new things - played some mini golf, and toured some of the other hotels. The following year we went back. POFQ again. This time we got engaged at Cinderella's Royal Table during dinner.

We went there for our honeymoon and every year since (Married in 2009). Made so many new memories. Went different times of the year that i had never done (Xmas being the most significant). We have gotten to the point where we have now even stayed at Wilderness lodge together. This year was Animal Kingdom Lodge and next year will be the Yacht Club.

Make new memories and enjoy. I had the same worries but it worked out great.

Joe

 

[Tinkerbell 8]

I have been in a similar situation. My ex husband LOVED going to Disney with me, we went every year for 5 years, it's even where we got engaged! After we separated I went with my new boyfriend (now husband) and it was a little strange, however it was his first time so I spent a lot of time pointing out small details in the park, giving a brief history, etc since it was my 14th trip. Thia helped to get my mind off my ex as I tried to share my love for WDW with him. My new husband actually doesn't like Disney so I've started going on solo trips, however I convinced him to go in November as I'm running my first half marathon and needed support.

As others have said trying new things may help get your mind off the times you went with your ex. But also, be mindful of feelings that may arise and be honest with your new partner. I've come to learn that although those memories do not disappear, being able to accept them and remember the good times can be very healing and helpful.