Top Ten Ways My Home is Like Disneyland
by Tom Sinsky
1. To increase revenue from rent, food & parking, we've had 8 other families move in with us. Yes, it's crowded, but more space should open up when we open up our Star Wars den and admit 5 additional families.
2. At Christmas I charge family members $12.95 for each candy cane. They aren't very big, but they're fresh.
3. Bathroom space is in short supply, but kids can get Fastpasses to bypass others waiting to go. I'd share more details, but it's complicated.
4. In addition to our dining room, there is Room 33, which only a few relatives can afford to enter. The food is said to be outstanding, and we recently added a window so other relatives can see them and strive to be better (richer.)
5. We have three cats.
6. When it rains or is windy we have no fireworks.
7. We never see Bob Iger here.
8. We have one car, but our dog has the only key & won't let us have it.
9. We wear a variety of overpriced Disneyland T-shirts.
10. Our backyard has DCA's Superstar Limo ride, perfectly restored & operational. It was surprisingly inexpensive.
North Korea & Gina Haspel have expressed interest in this attraction, though I can't imagine why.
