Tipping for table service

[HRHPrincessAriel]

When I was starting out as a young adult and dining on my own, I used to give 15%. I thought that's what I was supposed to give (this was in the late 90's, early aughts.) However, a couple of servers who had been perfectly friendly suddenly turned their back on me near the end of my visit. I wondered if I had offended them. Dad told me later that 20% was now expected as a tip, not 15%. (BTW, the restaurants in question were Chili's and Denny's). Nowadays, I give 20%, even at buffets, because I'm so scared of offending the servers. I usually also round the tip up to the next dollar. I'd like to say it's because I'm an Italian-American and we're so generous! But it's really because I'm scared.

How would they know in advance what you are tipping? My bill/tip is the absolute last thing we take care of when eating out...

 

[HRHPrincessAriel]

This thread is the first I've ever known.that people think 20% is normal. Miss Manners says 15-20% with the higher end for great service and the lower for typical service. I'd be interested to see some print guidelines suggesting otherwise.

That said, usually we don't leave a tip until we leave so I don't know if they turn their backs or not.

By the way, Italian Americans are generally just awesome!

Same on the 20%. We are typically around 18%

 

[Phonedave]

I have know several servers that were not allowed to dictate when the kitchen makes the food. They are just able to put in the order. Not saying it is right but this is the reality of some places. The kitchen staff (mostly men) do not want to be told by a "girl" when and how to do their job. Management allows this because they do not want to loose kitchen staff because where I live it is hard to find any help at all. You just do not know what is going on behind the scenes and things are not necessarily in the control of the servers.

That is really poor management. I have known and know a number of people in the food service industry. Maybe because around here (NYC tri state area) there is so much competition that situations like that would put a place out of business.

Really, the answer to the situation that you describe is not to tip more or less, but to not tip at all, because you stop eating there.

 

[~Mad Hatter~]

For me inside and outside of Disney it has always been 20% tip to the servers.