Things we all should know how to do... but don't (and previous generations did)

[prberk]

Today I realized that I had a button coming off of my sport coat at work -- the main button (the top one in the front), and I mentioned it to my friend, who said, "you have to take it to the dry cleaner's, and they will put it back on."

I said, yeah, I probably will. Then I commented that I really should be able to do it myself, and actually I think I might remember being shown some long time ago. But I know it would take some thinking to do it today. (The problem is remembering how to tie it off at the end, and exactly the best way to do it for best results.)

Any way, I thought I would start a thread about skills we realize everyone should have, and that previous generations never thought twice about having, but that today so many of us either can't or have forgotten. What are those skills for you? What are some of those skills that everyone should have, but so many of us don't and take for granted that we can pay someone to do -- but maybe we should do ourselves.

So, I will start:

• Sewing on a button.
• Plumbing/pipe-fitting

 

[Nemo14]

I asked my husband for some input about this, and I thought his reply was pretty interesting. When he and I were growing up, money was tight in both our families, and thus our parents did a lot of "fixing" things themselves. So it was only natural that he learned a lot about plumbing, carpentry, mechanics, and whatnot from his dad, in the same way that I learned cooking and sewing things from my mother, and enough manual skills from my dad to survive. I remember my dad would not let any of my siblings or me get our driver's license until we could successfully change a tire, and at least know how to check the oil and add more if needed. We had similar standards for our kids as they grew up.
So fast-forward to today - I still pretty much know how to do those things, but it's soooo much easier to just call AAA if I have a flat tire, or head over to JiffyLube or whatever when it's time for an oil change. Maybe it's just the result of being more able to afford those things now.

 

[trr1]

how about balancing a checkbook or cursive writing

 

[MinnieM123]

Polishing dress shoes with paste polish, and buffing to a high shine -- we used to do that every week as kids for our school shoes, and Sunday shoes. (Although the Sunday shoes were fancier patent leather, and I remember my mother telling us to use a little Vaseline on the patent leather to keep it from cracking. We'd wipe it off with a tissue in the morning.)

Polished shoes for years while in the workforce, too, but clothing and shoe styles have relaxed over the past 15 years or so, and I don't wear particularly dressy shoes to work anymore.

Actually, I hate polishing shoes!

 

[Goofyernmost]

The things I learned because I couldn't afford to have someone else do it is fairly large. Plumbing, electrical, auto mechanics, lawn mower repair, jump starting a dead battery, changing tires, doing car body work. Built a storage shed, removed and replaced clapboards on my house, putting a new roof on that same house. Installed an above ground swimming pool (24 foot). I bought it used had to take it down where it was and haul all the pieces parts back home, level the ground and install it again. The liner had a few wrinkles, but, it didn't seem to bother anything. I sold it to someone else 10 years later. I learned to sew on buttons and do some minor sewing repairs, iron my clothes, cook meals, both simple and complicated (I am still amazed at how many men still can't do that stuff).

Leap ahead a few years and I had put on a lot of weight, was no longer flexible enough to do a lot of those things so I started to pay people to do it. It was easier, but, the cost brought tears to my eyes.

I taught my daughters about basic car repair and had them do their own oil changes, check fluid levels, change tires and even at one point do a brake job on their cars. They can now go to a mechanic and not be snowed and fooled into repairs that they are oblivious too. The can talk cars and I even taught them to throw in a few "mechanical" words to send the message that they knew what what supposed to happen. To my knowledge, neither one has ever been taken by a sleazy auto repair person.

I have noticed that my grandchildren, have not been taught any of that stuff, but, they can computer with the best of them, which, I suppose is a handy thing to know in this day and age. My youngest granddaughter could maneuver an I-pad since the age of 18 months. Also in fairness, cars are not what they used to be either. I open the hood of my car and there is another hood, I can't even see the engine. I've decided I don't want to see the engine, in this case I am better off ignorant.

 

[trr1]

you know I was just thinking and addressing a letter for snail mail is another thing
or how to write a letter correctly

 

[MinnieM123]

Route planning via paper maps (distances/estimated time of travel related to miles, etc.) is a skill I hope we don't lose, by too heavy reliance on GPS.

 

[prberk]

Man, amen to all of this. Y'all have really hit all of the major ones for me. I teach a church youth group, and so many of them cannot do these skills, but the ones who can (especially mechanical) usually get so much more respect from their peers. They actually want to know (except, perhaps, the paper map thing -- for which they think I am old fashioned sometimes, until I show them that it gives me a broad view of options to see and consider before "locking in" exactly where I am going, but still some are not convinced).

When I have more time, I want to reply specifically to a few of you.

I do have one more to add that it is a skill but more of a different way to do things. Have you all noticed that the younger generations are not taught how to hold a fork (or even a pen) between fingers and held in place by the thumb? I see many, many teenagers now still holding a fork like you hold handlebars, scooping their food up with broad strokes and letting their elbows go out for the kill while their hands head for their mouths!

(OK, maybe that was a little over the top, but it just reminds me why everyone I knew growing up was taught to hold the fork between fingers and pressed in place by the thumb -- giving a better control in your hand and a better angle for reaching the mouth without raising and sending your elbow into another person's space.)

I am not sure without pics you know what I am talking about, or if you were ever taught this, but I can say it makes a difference in control for both writing and eating -- and I see so many parents not teaching it today, but yet those same parents have these skills. It seems like maybe many parents are confusing individuality of personality (let your kids be themselves and learn for themselves) with simply teaching them skills that are useful.

Anyway, not exactly the same thing but something I see not being taught but was useful.

 

[Goofyernmost]

Route planning via paper maps (distances/estimated time of travel related to miles, etc.) is a skill I hope we don't lose, by too heavy reliance on GPS.

I found that long range GPS guidance is worthless. In a small area like a city, then it is quite handy and much easier then trying to figure out a map. If I've been to a place once, I usually remember how to get there after that, but, when I have compared my plans with what the GPS "demands" I do, it seems to me that they add a whole lot of unnecessary deviations to the trip. It also gets it quite confused. After you ignore a few of the directions and it has to start over recalculating, it cause it to have a panic attack. One time coming back from Maine, a trip that I took many, many times, I decided to see what direction the GPS would take me. It wasn't pretty! After defying it a number of times, at one point, it actually directed me to turn directly into a small lake. Might have been trying to get even with me, I don't know! I think that they can become quite vindictive.

 

[jaklgreen]

Man, amen to all of this. Y'all have really hit all of the major ones for me. I teach a church youth group, and so many of them cannot do these skills, but the ones who can (especially mechanical) usually get so much more respect from their peers. They actually want to know (except, perhaps, the paper map thing -- for which they think I am old fashioned sometimes, until I show them that it gives me a broad view of options to see and consider before "locking in" exactly where I am going, but still some are not convinced).

When I have more time, I want to reply specifically to a few of you.

I do have one more to add that it is a skill but more of a different way to do things. Have you all noticed that the younger generations are not taught how to hold a fork (or even a pen) between fingers and held in place by the thumb? I see many, many teenagers now still holding a fork like you hold handlebars, scooping their food up with broad strokes and letting their elbows go out for the kill while their hands head for their mouths!

(OK, maybe that was a little over the top, but it just reminds me why everyone I knew growing up was taught to hold the fork between fingers and pressed in place by the thumb -- giving a better control in your hand and a better angle for reaching the mouth without raising and sending your elbow into another person's space.)

I am not sure without pics you know what I am talking about, or if you were ever taught this, but I can say it makes a difference in control for both writing and eating -- and I see so many parents not teaching it today, but yet those same parents have these skills. It seems like maybe many parents are confusing individuality of personality (let your kids be themselves and learn for themselves) with simply teaching them skills that are useful.

Anyway, not exactly the same thing but something I see not being taught but was useful.

I get what you are saying about holding silverware or pens. I work in a restaurant and see soooo many people that do not give their little kids silverware to eat with. I see 2 and 3 year olds eating with their hands like wild animals all the time. Even my husbands sister did not teach her kids how to use a fork or spoon. We went to their house for the child's 2nd birthday and she had never held a spoon. My husband's aunt said something and they tried to make an excuse about how kids are unable to use them at this age when I showed them a picture of my child at 14 months eating with a fork and another with her eating yogurt with a spoon. I think parents are just too lazy now to teach kids properly. Parenting is hard and you have to work at it and constantly teach them. It is just easier to let your kid do whatever they want. Also it does not seem that kids are learning how to eat over their plate. A ton of food lands on the floor. When I was a kid you never saw a huge mess under someones table especially at a restaurant. I am not talking about a piece or two but almost half of a kids meal is usually on the floor by the time they leave and of course the parent does not pick it up. Just disgusting. Anyone see the movie Idiocrocy? That is what we are turning into.

 

[prberk]

I get what you are saying about holding silverware or pens. I work in a restaurant and see soooo many people that do not give their little kids silverware to eat with. I see 2 and 3 year olds eating with their hands like wild animals all the time. Even my husbands sister did not teach her kids how to use a fork or spoon. We went to their house for the child's 2nd birthday and she had never held a spoon. My husband's aunt said something and they tried to make an excuse about how kids are unable to use them at this age when I showed them a picture of my child at 14 months eating with a fork and another with her eating yogurt with a spoon. I think parents are just too lazy now to teach kids properly. Parenting is hard and you have to work at it and constantly teach them. It is just easier to let your kid do whatever they want. Also it does not seem that kids are learning how to eat over their plate. A ton of food lands on the floor. When I was a kid you never saw a huge mess under someones table especially at a restaurant. I am not talking about a piece or two but almost half of a kids meal is usually on the floor by the time they leave and of course the parent does not pick it up. Just disgusting. Anyone see the movie Idiocrocy? That is what we are turning into.

What gets me sometimes is not just the lack of knowledge of how to hold a fork but a complete defiance when you are trying to teach them. They get offended and tell you they don't have to do it your way. It's like to usually beneficial message of individual rights has been repeated so often that people cannot see that you are actual trying to help them do something better.

But as for the parenting I do think to some degree it is laziness.

 

[jaklgreen]

What gets me sometimes is not just the lack of knowledge of how to hold a fork but a complete defiance when you are trying to teach them. They get offended and tell you they don't have to do it your way. It's like to usually beneficial message of individual rights has been repeated so often that people cannot see that you are actual trying to help them do something better.

But as for the parenting I do think to some degree it is laziness.

Oh, I know. I work with all of these ages 16 to about 22. A person can't even train them at the job because, of course, they are the most amazing, smartest, best, and most important people on the planet. I had a new kid tell me that he was going to tell me how he was going to do the job and that he did not appreciate me telling him what to do!!??!! I have been working longer then these little brats have been alive. I completely blame the parents on this and of course how society is now allowing this type of behavior. When I was that age, if someone dared talked to an older person that way then the managers foot would be up their behind. I have said it before and will keep saying it. Your kids are special to you but not to anyone else. Parents, you are not doing your kids any favors by raising them to think they are the best things on the planet. They will struggle at every job and at every relationship. Everyone needs to put in the work and the time, you do not get to be CEO over night and there will be people telling you how to do your job everywhere. Our job is to raise productive members of society and someone who goes from job to job because they do not like being told what to do. A lot of these kids have had more jobs then I have and I have been working for over 27 years.

 

[Sans Souci]

I think it's a good idea to know how to cook a few meals that have a basic recipe, but you can modify for different meals. I also think it's not a bad idea to learn how to make your own bread. I make my own no knead bread, it only has flour, salt, yeast and water in it. It is so much better than anything you can buy and it's almost like having bread on demand once it ferments in the fridge for a few days.

 

[Debbie]

I was just talking about this the other day with my mother. My son had a blowout on a two lane highway at midnight this week and I went to help him at least to see as the road wasn't lit. I keep a lightweight hydraulic jack in both vehicles just to cut down on the time it takes to jack a big truck up and that night, they finally understood why. I think one of the best skills I have taught my boys, who are now ages 24 and 21, is how to cook. They don't need rice cookers as they can cook rice on the stove. They can make a roux. They understand flavor profiles, marinating, and how to boil seafood correctly. They know how to break out a straight edge razor and clean an oven, how to take the oven door off and get to it. They also know how to clean and what chemicals work best for different spaces. They also know NOT to put my bras in the dryer, but to hang them up, which makes them cringe but they oblige.
I wasn't taught to sew as my mother was weird about things. I wasn't allowed to color until I learned to stay in the lines and she surely took my coloring book away from me if I didn't. My dad taught us well about tire changing, how to drive a standard shift, even a motorcycle. I wish I'd learned a bit more about changing out doors/frames, plumbing, and how to change out light fixtures, door locks etc.
Both of my sons prefer to print, cannot recall multiplication rapidly, cannot diagram a sentence, cannot tell you our state capitols, nor like to read a map, nor can they balance a checkbook the old-fashioned way, and they have never written a check. Unfortunately they were steered to use technology which is fine, but I feel it could be a handicap at times. At least they know how to properly eat at a table.

 

[FutureCEO]

cannot tell you our state capitols

Speaking of that topic, I see a bunch of videos on facebook and youtube with American's not knowing who Washington DC was named after (nevermind what the city is) among other stuff.

One video that comes to mind was the DC topic but this couple vacationing from Italy knew right off the bat.

 

[UncleMike101]

I think it's a good idea to know how to cook a few meals that have a basic recipe, but you can modify for different meals. I also think it's not a bad idea to learn how to make your own bread. I make my own no knead bread, it only has flour, salt, yeast and water in it. It is so much better than anything you can buy and it's almost like having bread on demand once it ferments in the fridge for a few days.

Yup.....
I'm appalled by the number of young, and older, people who don't even have the basic cooking skills to fry an egg.
And don't get me started on the #@&* in the frozen food sections.
Frozen oatmeal???
Frozen scrambled eggs???
Frozen baked potatoes???
Give me a break...........
My Mom taught me to cook from the time I was ten years old and I've never stopped.
We taught our kids to cook from scratch and they're teaching their kids to do the same.
I pity the people who have to rely on canned and frozen junk to survive.