Honestly, I don't know what to say. The things that have been going on in these forums for the last couple of weeks and days have been overwhelming. To say it's gotten heated is an understatement though you guys could argue I'm over-exaggerating. I thought about posting a long post but I knew people would not want to waste their time reading something very long.
Anyway, this war between the diehards or pixie snorters as some detractors have said and the critics or "haters" needs to stop. Both sides need to understand why the opposition is reacting the way they are and how to prevent disagreements from spiraling out of control and becoming a flame war.
Bottom line is this for all the diehards who have beef with the critics: I've said this time and time again. They love WDW. They really do. Maybe as equally or more than you. But there are some aspects they don't like and wish those aspects were addressed and if they're not, they get frustrated and vent in many ways. (Compare Disney to other companies, bring up the past, say they're not going to spend money there, you know the drill.) What they want most above all, is a better theme park, better vacation spot and a better product because we are the paying customers. We are the ones who are giving money to WDW and when it comes to spending money, we want to feel justified and satisfied for doing so. It's no different than paying thousands of dollars for sports season tickets, buying expensive jewelry or anything else we would not consider a basic necessity like food, water, shelter in our lives. Additionally, we all have brand loyalties and prefer certain brands over others. When products of our favorite brands suffers and/or the price skyrockets with it, we feel hurt, frustrated, angry, maybe even betrayed because we do not feel that we are valued as customers. That's really what they're trying to say. At least that's how I see it.
Now for the critics who have issues with the diehards: Again, it's not what you're saying, but it's how you're saying it. You can argue that your thoughts and opinions matter because "you care" but if you don't convey the message with clear, concise language and you don't say it in the tone you wanted to convey it in, then it gets misinterpreted and people will jump the conclusions. Something I read the other day pertains to film viewers who have beef with movie critics and while WDW isn't a film, the idea resonates that if you attack, it's basic and natural instinct for people to defend at all costs. The quote reads “Everyone wants to feel like they’re a part of what is conceived to be the winning group or side. No one wants to be associated with a conceived bunch of losers so every time someone attacks something we’ve aligned ourselves with, our first instinct is to defend it – whether it is a political view, a friend or family member, a beloved sports team or even something as contrived and ultimately meaningless as a film - if we love it and someone attacks it, then we WILL defend it!” I mean, put yourself in their shoes. Would you leap the defense? I'm not a mind reader for each and every single of you, but I would think that some of you would do the same. Personally, I think some of you need to strongly consider changing the way you express your opinions. Not all of you, but some of you. Why? So that you strongly convey the notion that you’re not sending a mixed message because if you send a mixed message, that could lead misunderstanding, false judgments and unintended consequences. I believe you can post criticism without the expensive of hurting others and it’s possible to do it without being too negative or too critical. Personally, if I were to post criticism, I would do everything in my power to sound compassionate without being snobbish. Does it work in all cases? No. There are some extreme cases where you need to be tough and more direct but for the most part, compassionate criticism works better. At least it does in my book.
To everyone: You have to keep in mind that typing your thoughts and opinions is a lot different than literally saying something out loud. When you say anything loud, it’s not just words that indicate what you are really saying. There’s tone of voice, emphasis on certain words, maybe even body language. Those factors can really enhance and convey the message and idea you’re trying to get across. You don’t always have that when you’re posting something on the Internet. It’s true miscommunication can happen anywhere, but on the Internet, it’s more likely to occur. If we do feel the obligation to post our thoughts and opinions, yes, it’s important to say them but also, it’s extremely important how we say them. I know it’s hard for each and single one of us to follow through posting without offending because we’re all so passionate about WDW. But we have to control that passion and not rub people the wrong way. I mean, the way we express our passion could really hurt people and we may not even know it at the time but by the time we do recognize it, it's too late in some cases. People are leaving the forums because of that.
This is just my personal thoughts on everything that's happened. I am aware that members have left the forums or have serious plans to visit less frequently because of the hostility. As for me, I want to believe things will get better on these forums. I called this place sanctuary. But as of now, I'm not entirely sure if I can really call it sanctuary and I really don't know what to do. I really need to think over what is the right thing to do for me from this point because you guys can give me all the suggestions or action plans but in the end, I make the final decision of whether I leave the forums for good, take an extended leave of absence or simply do what I've doing all this time. I've only been on here for 6-7 months but the whole nature of the forums have changed from when I first joined to what it has become today and not in a good way and I'm really concerned about it.
Anyway, this war between the diehards or pixie snorters as some detractors have said and the critics or "haters" needs to stop. Both sides need to understand why the opposition is reacting the way they are and how to prevent disagreements from spiraling out of control and becoming a flame war.
Bottom line is this for all the diehards who have beef with the critics: I've said this time and time again. They love WDW. They really do. Maybe as equally or more than you. But there are some aspects they don't like and wish those aspects were addressed and if they're not, they get frustrated and vent in many ways. (Compare Disney to other companies, bring up the past, say they're not going to spend money there, you know the drill.) What they want most above all, is a better theme park, better vacation spot and a better product because we are the paying customers. We are the ones who are giving money to WDW and when it comes to spending money, we want to feel justified and satisfied for doing so. It's no different than paying thousands of dollars for sports season tickets, buying expensive jewelry or anything else we would not consider a basic necessity like food, water, shelter in our lives. Additionally, we all have brand loyalties and prefer certain brands over others. When products of our favorite brands suffers and/or the price skyrockets with it, we feel hurt, frustrated, angry, maybe even betrayed because we do not feel that we are valued as customers. That's really what they're trying to say. At least that's how I see it.
Now for the critics who have issues with the diehards: Again, it's not what you're saying, but it's how you're saying it. You can argue that your thoughts and opinions matter because "you care" but if you don't convey the message with clear, concise language and you don't say it in the tone you wanted to convey it in, then it gets misinterpreted and people will jump the conclusions. Something I read the other day pertains to film viewers who have beef with movie critics and while WDW isn't a film, the idea resonates that if you attack, it's basic and natural instinct for people to defend at all costs. The quote reads “Everyone wants to feel like they’re a part of what is conceived to be the winning group or side. No one wants to be associated with a conceived bunch of losers so every time someone attacks something we’ve aligned ourselves with, our first instinct is to defend it – whether it is a political view, a friend or family member, a beloved sports team or even something as contrived and ultimately meaningless as a film - if we love it and someone attacks it, then we WILL defend it!” I mean, put yourself in their shoes. Would you leap the defense? I'm not a mind reader for each and every single of you, but I would think that some of you would do the same. Personally, I think some of you need to strongly consider changing the way you express your opinions. Not all of you, but some of you. Why? So that you strongly convey the notion that you’re not sending a mixed message because if you send a mixed message, that could lead misunderstanding, false judgments and unintended consequences. I believe you can post criticism without the expensive of hurting others and it’s possible to do it without being too negative or too critical. Personally, if I were to post criticism, I would do everything in my power to sound compassionate without being snobbish. Does it work in all cases? No. There are some extreme cases where you need to be tough and more direct but for the most part, compassionate criticism works better. At least it does in my book.
To everyone: You have to keep in mind that typing your thoughts and opinions is a lot different than literally saying something out loud. When you say anything loud, it’s not just words that indicate what you are really saying. There’s tone of voice, emphasis on certain words, maybe even body language. Those factors can really enhance and convey the message and idea you’re trying to get across. You don’t always have that when you’re posting something on the Internet. It’s true miscommunication can happen anywhere, but on the Internet, it’s more likely to occur. If we do feel the obligation to post our thoughts and opinions, yes, it’s important to say them but also, it’s extremely important how we say them. I know it’s hard for each and single one of us to follow through posting without offending because we’re all so passionate about WDW. But we have to control that passion and not rub people the wrong way. I mean, the way we express our passion could really hurt people and we may not even know it at the time but by the time we do recognize it, it's too late in some cases. People are leaving the forums because of that.
This is just my personal thoughts on everything that's happened. I am aware that members have left the forums or have serious plans to visit less frequently because of the hostility. As for me, I want to believe things will get better on these forums. I called this place sanctuary. But as of now, I'm not entirely sure if I can really call it sanctuary and I really don't know what to do. I really need to think over what is the right thing to do for me from this point because you guys can give me all the suggestions or action plans but in the end, I make the final decision of whether I leave the forums for good, take an extended leave of absence or simply do what I've doing all this time. I've only been on here for 6-7 months but the whole nature of the forums have changed from when I first joined to what it has become today and not in a good way and I'm really concerned about it.
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