Dear Abby

[Nottamus]

Been there.

we all vacation different, and Disney allows you to have many many options. No two couples’ vacations will ever completely sync up

You do you, we’ll do us - and we’ll meet later for dinner? Fireworks? A drink later?

Disney is a whole bunch of money to drop to do things you do not want to do.

 

[Goofyernmost]

I had that experience with my entire family. I organized and paid for a family gathering back in 2008. There were 11 of us total. We had multiple meetings and even a couple of dinners before the trip. We didn't plan out any attractions all we did was plan transportation, housing and even left things open for meals. I paid for airfare from Vermont to Orlando, rented two cars, (I had brought my own car. We decided what park to go to and that was on the same day, because we didn't have enough cars to accommodate each family so we agreed that if someone wanted to leave a park early they were to call us (cheap cell phones) and say that wanted to leave and asking for anyone that might want to go back at that time with them. I rented a 6 bedroom villa just offsite, and we either ate in the villa (full kitchen plus gas grill) or go to any of three remaining locations. Numbers of vehicles limited it to only three selections but with the villa itself it really gave everyone 4 choices. Sometimes we all went to the same place. Remember, offsite no reservations are necessary. We set up rules especially for the villa that all parties were to help maintain the place, share cooking, share basic groceries, dish clearing, etc. At the parks we all went our separate ways to experience our favorite things and if we wanted we used the phone to meet up at a quick service place or not. Totally at the digression of each group. We never had any problems, complaints and everyone, especially the kids had a very nice stress free time, doing the things we wanted to do and meeting often enough to enjoy each others company, play cribbage, laugh, compare notes of the day and decide what to do the next day. It was great fun. We haven't done it sense but that is probably because I haven't offered to pay of it again. I have had another granddaughter since then and they keep asking when we are all going again. I just say as soon as you pay for it and that usually stops the discussion.

 

[eliza61nyc]

Dear Abby; We are an older couple in our sixties and are very selfish with our WDW vacations. We always have a wonderful time and don't mind telling freinds and family this when they ask. Therein lies the problem. They see that we really enjoy ourselves and want to go with us. We are really reluctant to do this for a couple of reasons. The main reason is we have given in and taken freinds and family only to have it turn out bad, We tell them that we buy a good pair of sneakers and a couple of months beforehand we walk a few miles every chance we get and they should do the same. They don't listen. We tell them when we go, we get up at dawn and stay until dark and then some. They don't listen We tell them that we do the inverted and backwards rollercasters, free fall drops, dark rides, and they don't listen. They even say with a smile "I'm not doing that" and for some reason expect us to do the same. I'm not spending all that money not to so..... It has always ended badly and we end up going our own way, at our suggestion, with bad feelings afterwards. So how do we tell these people that they can't go with us? Or should we just sneak off and not tell anyone when we go?

Sincerly
MM

I vote sneak out. So I've been in this dilemma, I've invited various friends and family to vacation with us and its never ended well. our vacation with my brother and his family was a disaster.

just say no. lol

 

[JIMINYCR]

Dear MM,
Apparently you havent been listening lately. According to all who are in the know WDW S***S. Theres no reason anyone should be going and if you do go youll certainly regret spending the money to go because theres no value. So inform your friends that youve given up on all future Disney trips, you are now informing Disney by no longer supporting their greediness by booking anything and will stay home. Show your friends the multiple negative posts as evidence of your new WDW stance.
Then book a resort under your maiden name, sneak out in the dead of night and have the trip of a lifetime. When you return and they ask where youve been, tell them you werent answering calls, were quarantining against Covid at home and didnt want to possibly spread anything to such good friends.

 

[JoeCamel]

Abby's advice has always been no one can take advantage of you unless you let them

 

[chama1]

I have to say I've done Disney with family, friends, etc and I also will not do it again...I love them but since their grown I think they can manage their trips without me. I go to Disney to enjoy what I want love to do without teens, babies, adults/kids who complain about heat, cold, lines, etc...my days of that are over, it's my time as a "senior" to enjoy what I love...I know the little "quiet" places in the parks, that I can enjoy a dessert, cool drink, even eat my lunch without a care in the world....when they do visit me in Florida and ask me to meet them in the Parks I tell them I'll meet them at the Resorts...eat, chat, and leave.

 

[WallyWorld]

If you can't tell these people the truth, aren't they really acquaintances rather that friends?

 

[Sbk1234]

Tell them that a necessary part of travelling with you is they have to be willing to "swing." That should get most everyone to decide not to join you! lol

 

[tinker-ella]

Dear Abby; We are an older couple in our sixties and are very selfish with our WDW vacations. We always have a wonderful time and don't mind telling freinds and family this when they ask. Therein lies the problem. They see that we really enjoy ourselves and want to go with us. We are really reluctant to do this for a couple of reasons. The main reason is we have given in and taken freinds and family only to have it turn out bad, We tell them that we buy a good pair of sneakers and a couple of months beforehand we walk a few miles every chance we get and they should do the same. They don't listen. We tell them when we go, we get up at dawn and stay until dark and then some. They don't listen We tell them that we do the inverted and backwards rollercasters, free fall drops, dark rides, and they don't listen. They even say with a smile "I'm not doing that" and for some reason expect us to do the same. I'm not spending all that money not to so..... It has always ended badly and we end up going our own way, at our suggestion, with bad feelings afterwards. So how do we tell these people that they can't go with us? Or should we just sneak off and not tell anyone when we go?

Sincerly
MM

Totally understand this ...we are frequent WDW vacationers, and over the years we have developed our own routines and speed. Other people just slow us down or want to waste too much time with chatting and visiting. Disney minutes are expensive and we prefer doing our own thing. For this reason we don't really announce our trips beforehand.

 

[graphite1326]

Totally understand this ...we are frequent WDW vacationers, and over the years we have developed our own routines and speed. Other people just slow us down or want to waste too much time with chatting and visiting. Disney minutes are expensive and we prefer doing our own thing. For this reason we don't really announce our trips beforehand.

I know exactly what you mean.

 

[bjlc57]

here is what we did with my two kids and their husbands.. We asked them to stay with us until NOON... and we followed the touring plans until NOON... and then they were on their own for all the rest of the vacation. to the point where both couples said .. "we are on a separate vacation then you are.. WHICH WAS OUTSTANDING... We did NOT HAVE AJOINING ROOMS.. we all did our own thing.. but we were together for breakfast and we were there for rope drop each morning.. this is a must.. after that when they ate or where they went was their choice.. and when they left the park and came back was their choice.. the one couple left the park early and came back when magic kingdom was open 24 hours.. they left the park at 3 am.. I was deeply asleep...we all had a good time..

 

[SSH]

I have done it before and I will never do it again. I refuse to travel with anyone outside of my wife and daughter to Disney. I am very selfish on my Disney trips and do not want to even think about what someone may want, or try to work around their plans. I have had to travel, with distant friends in the past, and vowed to never do it again. I could only imagine family would make it worse, than friends. Hard no!

I'm like this with HHN (Halloween Horror Nights at Universal). Halloween's my favorite holiday and I wait for this event all year long and I'm a bit of a park commando - I want to soak up the event as much as possible. I agreed to go a couple of times with others and it ruined the experience. Two diff years - two diff sets of people.

The first time, the person's significant other did NOT want to be there and made that clearly known all night - sulking, dragging behind, making snide comments...what a miserable sourpuss.

Second time, the folks we were with insisted on meeting for dinner outside the park first (knew that was a bad idea), then sure enough, were late getting to dinner, which seriously cut HHN time that night. They constantly wanted to rest - like every 15 min. Walked soooo slowly the entire night. (Which is totally fine - just not my style.)

Never again.

 

[spock8113]

All I think of here is John Pinette (God bless him) and his standup routine about Disneyworld. All true which is why it is so funny.
I won't link it here because that routine has some adult content. (M-L)

 

[Goofyernmost]

All I think of here is John Pinette (God bless him) and his standup routine about Disneyworld. All true which is why it is so funny.
I won't link it here because that routine has some adult content. (M-L)

Yea, but the Epcot Death March applies to all of us.

 

[jaklgreen]

I just flat out tell people that I go by myself or with just my husband and/or kids. That's it. I will give them all of the help and information that they will need, but I am not planning a trip for them and following them around. I like my time to do what I want to do and not what other's want to do. So far, everyone has understood.

 

[Club Cooloholic]

Dear Abby; We are an older couple in our sixties and are very selfish with our WDW vacations. We always have a wonderful time and don't mind telling freinds and family this when they ask. Therein lies the problem. They see that we really enjoy ourselves and want to go with us. We are really reluctant to do this for a couple of reasons. The main reason is we have given in and taken freinds and family only to have it turn out bad, We tell them that we buy a good pair of sneakers and a couple of months beforehand we walk a few miles every chance we get and they should do the same. They don't listen. We tell them when we go, we get up at dawn and stay until dark and then some. They don't listen We tell them that we do the inverted and backwards rollercasters, free fall drops, dark rides, and they don't listen. They even say with a smile "I'm not doing that" and for some reason expect us to do the same. I'm not spending all that money not to so..... It has always ended badly and we end up going our own way, at our suggestion, with bad feelings afterwards. So how do we tell these people that they can't go with us? Or should we just sneak off and not tell anyone when we go?

Sincerly
MM

I have traveled with friends and family before. It can be fun. Having an understanding that you will each have your own schedule but make plans for meals together is helpful. Another tactic is to do a few days with the friends but either before they arrive or after they leave have your own time set aside. Maybe 3 days with them and 4 by yourself.

 

[DfromATX]

No, we have our routine also and I wouldn't bring along anyone that we don't normally travel with (my husband and our kids). That's because we only go every 2 or 3 years so it's a big deal when we go and we have everything planned out. If I lived there and went all the time, that would be different. I guess then I wouldn't mind slowing it down for a new person.